Is a woman's looks the most important factor for men?

[Anonymous]

Not the only factor, but the most important.

Yes

No

[Ratiocinative]

Depends on how you look at it, pun intended. Looks are not completely separate from personality. Being unhappy is probably the number one cause of overeating, and ultimately obesity. Thinner women are more likely to be happy and fun to be around. Same for men too.

Also, many women are completely delusional about how fat they are. I'm 5'9" 180 and I'm pretty muscular, I can bench 335 and deadlift 500, I would consider myself overweight, little bit of a spare tire. A woman who is 5'5" 160 is obese, despite these women often describing themselves as average.

For reference, here is a woman at an ideal weight. She is 5'8" and 120 lbs.
https://i.imgur.com/JWMpL.jpg

I don't mind women who have some flab. Women who are a little overweight can still be very attractive as everyone carries weight a little bit differently. But obese is definitely a deal breaker. An average woman who is 5'4"-5'5" should be wary when they start getting into the 130s and 140s as you're probably approaching obesity if they aren't a weightlifter.

[Blonde401]

That's not an ideal weight. That's underweight. That may be your preference but being underweight is just as unhealthy if not more unhealthy than being a little overweight. Don't tell women to starve themselves to be 'ideal' when it's complete rubbish.

[Ratiocinative]

@Blonde401 She is not underweight at all. That is a very healthy weight. The belly button/gut area is supposed to be the smallest part of the torso in both men and women.

The biggest giveaways for emaciation is an extremely gaunt face and visible outlines of the ribs in the upper torso from the front or back indicating muscle wasting. None of those are the case for this woman. She is at a very healthy weight and trying to say she isn't just shows how fat women, and people as a whole, are getting these days.

[xXiTacoXx]

She's actually medically underweight for her height. She's a healthy weight for a short girls, but an unhealthy weight for a tall girl like herself.

[Blonde401]

No. She's underweight, check your facts. Do you mean the waist? Not everyone has a defined waist. Waist measurements aren't always defined by someone's weight. I know people who weight less than me but don't have as small of a waist than me.

You can be underweight and not look totally emaciated, she still looks too thin as well as scientifically being too thin. Where did you even get this information? Medically she is underweight. You have a preference for underweight people then fine but that ain't healthy, never has been and never will be.

[Blonde401]

And how 'fat' anyone else is or isn't is irrelevant. She is underweight. Her bmi shows she is underweight for her height. End of story.

[Ratiocinative]

@Blonde401 You are delusional. Her weight is very healthy. Women are supposed to be thin. Women don't have the testosterone required for bulky muscular arms, legs, or glutes. Any woman with large arms and legs is just fat, or on steroids, but more likely just fat. Women especially tend to store a lot of fat in thier arms. That's why obese women have arms the size of professional wrestling even though they don't lift weights.

This woman does look like her breasts are a little small, so maybe she'd weigh 122 or 123 if she had bigger breasts. You're just calling her underweight to make yourself feel better about how fat you are.

[xXiTacoXx]

Dude ask your doctor or look it up. Everyone and thing will prove she is underweight for her height she is not healthy.

[Blonde401]

Breast size is irrelevant! Breasts aren't determined by your weight or shape or anything! You can be a size 8 with F size boobs or a size 20 with C's. Doesn't matter what size her boobs are. She's underweight, medically, a doctor will say she is underweight. That is a medical fact.

[Blonde401]

How fat I am is irrelevant! Use a bmi calculator instead of slinging insults.

[Blonde401]

@xXiTacoXx thank you.

[Ratiocinative]

@Blonde401 BMI is not a useful measurement of health, but even if you insist on using it 5'8" 120 is within the margin of error of a normal BMI, so you only refute your own claim she is under weight because BMI says she isn't.

BMI doesn't take into account whether you weigh more because of fat or muscle. Athletes or even just people who work physically demanding jobs are ranked as obese even with an average % of body fat and sometimes even when they have six pack abs.

BMI is not based on scientific data. BMI was simply based on how long people of certain weights lived. If a cancer patient loses weight and dies, that doesn't mean they died because they didn't eat enough, they died from cancer. Same for any other degenerative or muscle wasting disease.

BMI is garbage and any doctor who uses BMI is garbage. You can clearly see this woman has low body fat and that she has a normal level of muscle for a woman, which shows she is completely healthy as far as he weight goes.

[Blonde401]

No. She's underweight. It doesn't fit your agenda. End of. She's unhealthy.

[coachTanthony]

No... its the first important factor not the most... because that is what draws a man in...

[ChromAzonyx108]

Nailed it - very accurate answer.
One caveat: not all that glitters is gold. ... though I guess you implied that.

[coachTanthony]

@ChromAzonyx108 Correct!

[brain5000]

If a man isn't drawn in, then no relationship or sex occurs. Nothing compensates for looks, so I think it _is_ the most important factor.

[WriterAndPainter]

Agreed. It's the same for women. If there's not an initial attraction then there's nothing to begin with. No one goes at the someone says "hey I'm not attracted to you, but you look like you're really nice".

[LittleSally]

Oh definitely.
Why? I've seen plenty of guys who go on dates because they love how the girl looks, they lie to themsleves that she's also funny and smart... and perfect for them until the reality hits them, but they still stay in the relationship because they don't want to give up the sex... and how his friends view him as some sort of a hero for pulling off such a hot girl.
He's also, of course, shopping around for someone equally as hot - with a hopefully better personality. When he thinks he finds her, he leaves the first one and moves on... And the cycle either goes on, or the girl dumps him first...
Either way, they would make all sorts of excuses for the hot women and date them proudly and despite of their actual emotional needs... because looks, although not everything, are what's most important to the majority of them.

[applesandoranges22]

who hurt you man?

[applesandoranges22]

such a specific story lol

[LittleSally]

@applesandoranges22 Haha I've seen this happen in the lives of at least 12 different dudes (more than 12 actually)... That were all my friends - band members...

[LittleSally]

@applesandoranges22 *Expected a comment just like yours, though... xD

[_caaaaaaam]

You go girl. Honesty at its finest.

[LittleSally]

@_caaaaaaam Thank you. =) Much appreciated.

[Anonymous]

I know society makes it seem like it is nowadays but I actually wonder the same thing. When I was in my early to middle teenage years I wasn't exactly attractive and always felt sad that I couldn't get male attention. Now that I'm in my twenties I look a lot better now than I did then but I wouldn't say I have the best luck with men. They don't really approach/flirt with me. I know that men can get intimidated about approaching as do girls but sometimes I can't help but wonder if something is actually drawing guys away from me.

[NyomiMcClinton]

Most guys will go for someone who is attractive to them or easy on the eyes. That doesn't mean you have to look like 10 or have a supermodel body. I never cared how people perceived me, or if any guy liked me. Stuff like that is way to overwhelming.

[RJGraveyTrain]

Most important? Depends on how you look at it; most people are drawn to others by their appearance initially so you could say so, but for many if you have the personality of a Nazi crap-sack, how hot you are won't do much for some.

[JuicyBrain]

I agree !
And goddamn, you look even more gorgeous than usual on your profile pic. The smile really suits you lol.

[RJGraveyTrain]

@JuicyBrain Baha, thank you very much.

[spnsfi]

@JuicyBrain troll. me/images/two-face/two-face. jpg

[brain5000]

I like your picture too! Can't wait to see the other eye! ;)

[UnknownXYZ]

www.court-records.net/.../miles-crossed(c).gif

I think it is but she doesn't have to be drop dead gorgeous. He just needs to find her sexually attractive. There are plenty of girls who aren't so good looking but they turn me on so fucking much.

That being said, I think it's not that hard for girls to sexually attractive to men than vice versa. If a girl simply keeps in shape, that's enough to make most guys want to bone you (even with the most mediocre face).

[MusicMayhem]

It isn't but you know, it helps a lot if a guy meets a girl who is pretty.

For me, despite the perception that all guys just want sex with a pretty women, I think the main thing you need to understand is that the majority of women are very beautiful to us men. They have sexy curves, exacerbated by womens clothing styles that expose flesh. Add in how much time women take to look pretty before going out doing their hair, picking a great outfit, and their natural flirtyness etc. and it's hard for a guy not to put a lot of importance on a women's great looks!

[brain5000]

You phrased this question rather well. Yes, I think looks are the most important thing. I believe this is true for both men and women. Hasn't it been written somewhere that people - including women - decide whether someone is fuckable/spongeworthy within five minutes or less?

Quoting @RJGraveyTrain , "if you have the personality of a Nazi crap-sack, how hot you are won't do much for some." This is also true, but I have slept with a few women who I later learned might secretly be Nazis. Those relationships didn't last, but we got laid.

Looks buys you a ticket; personality keeps the show going.

[oddwaffle]

It's not the most important but it's a decisive factor.

I mean if you look like a fat worm then your chance of having a guy striking a conversation with you is astronomically low. It's not that the guys are being shallow or anything but that's sort of how a guy run a preliminary check before he attempt to look like a fool.

I mean, if you are a decent looking girl and you are in a bar to fish some guy (or hunt? What's the term women use these days?). You see a couple guys walk into the bar. One of them have the look that even his mother couldn't love him. He makes the next guy looks positively decent. What are your chances of walking up to him with a smile and fish?

[MarkRet]

For most men, looks are NOT the most important factor. After all, you have to connect on a personality level for something to work. There are some guys however, even here on GaG, that will moan about how they just can't find a girl. I have a suspicion that THEY'RE the ones who only want a hottie. For them, looks are the most important factor.

[Anonymous]

There are only two areas where people can have value as a member of their sex. The first is from gender roles which we have done away with. The second is access to their reproductive parts. In other words for sexual gratification of the ability to make babies.

Humans can have value outside those areas, but they have nothing to do with being a man or a woman. All value men and women have outside of those areas do not give them any value as either a man, nor as a woman. So if someone wants to be respected as either a man, or a woman, those are the only areas that matter.

So in a world without gender roles, a woman's looks with likely be the primary thing that he will value her for as a woman. No one is going to be happy with someone they are not attracted to, but plenty of people will stay with horrible partners do to the attraction they have for the man or woman that mistreats them. Human's, both men and women, are far more shallow than we pretend to be.

[Panay]

It's a starting point. attraction is needed, and a certain level of this will come from looks. How much varies with the guy; but for most looks only spark sexual desire, anything more, like a relationship or into navy requires a good personality.

And again for most men, even if they find someone sexually attractive based on their looks, they won't won't to actually do anything unless their personality meets their standards

The thing with personalities is you need to spend time with someone to get to know them. And you can't spend time with everyone.
So when you want to fuck or have a relationship withsomeone attractive and with a good personality, looks are the place to start because they're immediately obvious

[Bandit74]

Well I would say looks are the most important thing for women too.

Your personality generally only matters AFTER you meet that person's looks criteria first. If you don't, then it doesn't matter what your personality is like, you can't be with that person. Looks are the biggest predictor of what kind of people you are able to date.

Also an attractive murderer probably has better odds of having sex and getting into a relationship than an ugly law abiding citizen would.

[tiajoker]

Nope, not true. I don't think I've ever legitimately thought a guy was attractive until I got to know him. Its like what others might see as the ugliest guy around, I'll think he's the cutest one I know because what I like about who he is makes me 100% attracted to him. After I usually find out he's a jerk though, I almost instantly see him a lit less attractive then the world does.

[TripleAce]

Looks matter more because personality often time changes to accommodate each other if you really want it to work. But looks will be the same relative to each

Which is why you almost never see people dating someone they find unattractive, that is because from what it seems, personality does not matter more

[GingerGuy]

I wouldn't say "most important" no but important yes. I believe you must be attracted to anyone you're with and that goes for both men and women. Not that they have to be models, but YOU have to find them attractive as well as like their personality. Looks are also generally what guys notice first. But certainly not the "most important" Unless a guy wants only a purely sexual relationship.

[SaraLovesUnicorns]

I think a lot of men also care about personality, but it depends on what stage of life they are in and what kind of partener they are looking for

[sedrftvgyhujik]

Most if not all of us care about personality.
What she is like to us, avoiding money grabbing types and likes us for the right reasons , looking for someone that wants complimentary things , trustworthy , trusting of us but not naive.

[Browneye57]

Well, the guys that said 'no' are clueless. Or dead.
A woman's youthful beauty is her most valuable asset - it's what puts her at the peak of her SMV. After that it's just, well, starting to get past it's 'sell by' date.

Peak value rounds out a lot of things for men, so theirs comes much later. But no, for a woman, it's her youth and purity, her beauty.

[brain5000]

There are some very beautiful older women tho. Everything you said is true except for your focus on "youthful" beauty. Looks usually fade but not always.

blog.soirmag.lesoir.be/.../mon.jpg

[Browneye57]

@brain5000 - Uh, no, age does not benefit the female physique. Pictures don't lie. LOL
Trust me when I tell ya... :)

[brain5000]

An older woman might be less likely to have The Perfect Body, I guess, but I see a lot of good looking older women around. They might not look as good naked as a younger woman but they are far from hopeless.

[Browneye57]

@brain5000 Who said anything about 'hopeless'? The question was 'is looks the most important?"
The answer is, "it's high up there on the list", but it fades. This is just reality. There's no point in arguing it. And there better be something there besides to back it up. Some women rely on their looks alone and never amount to much. By forty they're pretty washed up. Others are much more interesting.
But no, you gotta wake up each morning and look at her so she better look pretty fukkin good to you. I call it natural beauty - what do they look like with no make up, just climbed outta bed? If she doesn't look great you'll have a lifetime of disappointment. OTOH natural beauty never gets old - always a joy.

[brain5000]

Makeup is totally a factor, but come on. You think first thing in the morning this "looks pretty much washed up?" Granted Selma Hayek wasn't 40 when this photo was taken. She was 49!!!

https://static.latercera.com/20150518/2118632.jpg

[brain5000]

Even if we all agree the boobs are fake... still smoking hot. I'll even allow for some boob saggage.

[Browneye57]

@brain5000 You're just proving the point that looks are important. LOL

[brain5000]

Looks ARE the most important thing!! I already posted my own comment in the main thread to that effect.

[Kuraj]

Looks are needed to draw me in, personality is needed to keep me there.
But since ugly people are just as likely to have a shitty personality as pretty people, I'm not going to bother with them and go for someone who meets more of my requirements from the get go.

[Riogrande499]

Growing up with women taught me a lot. Like women don't like to be objectified. Looks are cool but there not everything. Like I personally try to get with women who have a quirky Cuteness. Like braces or short hair small chest area likes comics.. those are things GS I enjoy and if she has em and wants to date hell yeah just off of her being herself.

[red324]

I've said this many many times. She doesn't have to be a super model, in fact I'd rather she not be. Also what fun is it if she doesn't understand my quirky personality and gets offended by everything I say? So to sum it all up our personalities have to get along, and I have to be attracted to at least a few of her physical features.

[PinkMichae]

I think that something needs to attract them physically. Like the legs, ass, eyes, face, body, etc.. But not every part of a woman has to be attractive. Personality is a must unless he's just planning to fuck her.

[writing_essays]

I think looks determines whether the relationship will start while personality determines whether the relationship will last.

[Anonymous]

I voted A.

It shouldn't be.

And for me if I were single, it wouldn't be now.

But realistically, yes. It's shocking to see an overweight unattractive woman with a guy who is successful and good looking. It's shocking to see a gorgeous woman with a loser. It's the single biggest driver of her desirability.

We don't look at the hot girl with the loser and think 'she's probably a bitch that's why she can't do better'. No, we know she could do better anyway.

[ambertaylor]

I think it's important to have that initial attraction not just for men but for anyone - the first encounter between two people will be solely based on looks and if that doesn't light the spark then I'd argue that it would be a means to an end.

[Anonymous]

Personality and looks are 50/50.

You can have a great personality but if I'm not attracted then no. I don't think a girl would feel happy if she knew her boyfriend didn't find her physically attractive. I know girls say they care about personality a lot but I think they do value their own looks in regards to how turned on their boyfriend gets just as much as guys care about a girls looks.

Likewise.

If a girl is super hot but a bad person. They won't get a second look from me.