Is being "busy" a good excuse for not texting back?

Question

It's a convenient excuse. Everyone uses it. I get it. However, realistically, how long does it actually to take to TYPE a text message? Between reading a message, and replying, we're looking at maybe what, 15-20 seconds? So when people finally reply after sometimes days of no response, is "I've been busy" code for I just don't wanna talk to you? For some reason being left on open or read is so frustrating, just take 5 seconds to say hey I'm doing x y z at the moment I'll message you later. Anyone disagree?

PrettyKitty31 · Accepted Answer

I feel like there are a few factors that come into play. I think it depends on the relationship you're in and I think it depends on the content of the message. If you've just written me out 5 paragraphs of text yea I'm not responding to that immediately unless I've got several minutes to kill. Personally, I think it's rude to just shoot a sentence to someone after they've written a book.
I have said "you've written a lot, I'm busy right now, I will respond when I can with a thought out answer"
however, that again depends on the relationship. If you're some guy I've known for 10 minutes I'm probably going to just let you hang there for a bit. Because I feel like with some people you're damned if you do and damned if you don't. As I've said, I have told people I was busy. One guy had the nerve to basically demand I respond then even after saying I'm busy and I'll get back to you because "you had time to respond just do it now!" Who the f*ck do you think you are? Nope!
I try not to leave people hang for days or weeks but, I admit, it happens. I read the message when I'm busy and totally forget to get back to it. It's not always disinterest, at least not for me, I just have a shitty memory.

blasiangirl12 · Accepted Answer

It depends. No because for example if you're not texting back but I see you posting on social media and then hit me up the next day saying 'I was busy', I'll think that's rude. People make time for the people they want to make time for. It's called priorities. Even if they don't text back as soon as you message them but they explain before hand that they're text back game is weak or they'll be busy, that's more understandable than nothing at all.
Yes because some people are generally busy people. If you didn't think you would be busy but you actually end up being busy and couldn't text someone saying that then it makes sense

Zelea · Accepted Answer

Outside of a relationship, yes. And yeah sometimes busy means I don't feel like talking and that's ok, I still love you the same as before. Sometimes I'm busy relaxing, enjoying my own company. If I'm around other people I find it rude to hold a text convo. Or I might actually be busy with work, errands, adulting, etc.

In a relationship, no, you prioritize things you find important, but that doesn't mean you "deserve" a text back within 5 minutes.

Citara · Accepted Answer

People who expect an answer right away are way more annoying then people who say they won't text back because they are busy. Sometimes it seems that people just can't accept that they have to wait for someone to text back and believe their conversation is the most important thing in the world. And yes, it can be very distracting to answer messages when you are busy, even when it just takes 10 seconds

LinguistRick · Accepted Answer

I'm a terrible texter and my girlfriend has gotten upset with me numerous times because of this. I told her that I am not ignoring her, that I am really busy and prefer to focus on the work in front of me. I recall one time she sent me a follow up text 5 min after she sent the first one. The second one said "?" I thought it was cute. A lot of women want an immediate response, which is the expectation now days with social media and everyone being connected. I told my girl I would not change and that if it's very important, to call. She kicked and screamed for a while but now she understands. Unfortunately couples think it's a good idea to text non stop. What they don't realize is this is slowly ruining the relationship.

brocklee · Accepted Answer

It is a petty thing. How did our ancestors find ways to seek ways to get the attention of their love when out working, shopping, basically just living life? They didn't. The absence was GOOD.

Today we have the ability to communicate at any time, any place. It has turned men and women into attention seekers. "Needing" constant affirmation from their object of desire. It is weak. It is bullshit.

Heythere2013 · Answer

I am on the fence w/this one. When dating, I noticed a trend, if the guy was too busy to do things for/with me, he was interested. If I'm in a relationship that is different. When my boyfriend gets busy, he cannot text, but he still makes an effort. If the person claims to be busy and is updating facebook, they are telling you lies. My long distance guy would always make excuses why he couldn't text, but he could post on social media.

ojpaudu · Answer

Dude, stop worrying about how long it takes for people to respond to you. You're going to drive yourself crazy with it. The only solution to it is to start living your own life (cliche i know) , stop waiting for other to respond to you and get busy yourself.

Mantis595 · Answer

It depends on the topic and on whether or not answering that one text might lead to a full blown conversation. Sometimes people are actually busy and would rather not get distracted.

But yeah, most of the time it's just a convenient excuse to avoid conversation.

ElisaPlease · Answer

Yes because the more you respond to texts, the more the other person assumes you are to conversation. Sometimes I'll keep it going if I can tell they want to talk. But most days, I just won't respond. Warning someone before hand about bad texting habits is a better solution.

RealandGenuine1991 · Answer

Everyone doesn't have their phone in their hand 24/7. but saying you're busy is a lame excuse. Sometimes I have my phone at the bottom of my purse when we're out somewhere , I don't always check my messages but when I do, I do make an effort to respond. I think it's rude to see a message and not respond on purpose. It shows you aren't concerned or interested to me

Ads123 · Answer

It's better if you know you're going to be busy at the start to say look i can't talk i'm busy and when things calm down i'll get back to you,
But even if someone says they're busy after days without replying it could be that they didn't want to say they were busy or get themselves into a conversation with you that would distract them

Anonymous · Answer

Yeah if they haven't replied by the end of the day or next morning I think it's an excuse. You do have to account for really busy shifts though like in the healthcare profession etc, or those that travel with network coverage etc. But yes generally after 24 hours it becomes an excuse.

loraa · Answer

A lot of people are lazy texters and using the "I'm busy" text is pretty convenient for them. But using it all the time is annoying and you can already tell that they are lying.

Harrisontb · Answer

Sometimes you're in a situation where having your phone out, even if for one text, is impolite, like funerals (one of many examples). I think there's more to it than just how long it takes to type.

ThisDudeHere · Answer

It does not indeed take long to type a text. But you type back once, they'll write again, and then you'll have to type back to that, and to the one after that, and after that, ad infinitum.

pinkzoesbb · Answer

I don’t think it’s an excuse at all. You are right. It doesn’t take that long to respond. Even to say hi can’t talk text later. I know in some situations texting back is impossible but, very few.

cutestboyever · Answer

I work at home, covered in grease (don't want to touch my phone) so I'll just hit the button to stop and totally forget being so busy. Sometimes I'll work until I notice its gotten dark and 730 by the time shower and dinner happens you really aren't focused on a phone.. at least some people don't glue their faces to a phone.

JayFromEngland · Answer

I don't really appreciate "busy" as an excuse. There is nothing wrong with being busy, it's totally fair. But I'd like a bit more openness - being so vague is just going to leave the person left our or unprioritised.

TwinCKI · Answer

Its not an excuse. If they really cared about you then they would try their best to respond to you at least sometime in the night. No one can be busy ALL day

Anon85 · Answer

Well, if I'm out with friends or aquaintances it's a bit rude for me to keep pulling out my phone to text someone who isn't even there with me

Matt_Dingus · Answer

I can't text back when I'm driving or working with my hands or with a client or hanging off a ladder. I also need to think up a reply but I can't because I'm busy working or recovering from my day. I also likely have 75 other unopened texts to sort through, 300 unopened emails, a stack of unopened mail, and 45 notifications on my work project management app. I'll get to it when I clean the grease off my hands while I have a chance to sit and think for a minute.

kitty71 · Answer

Totally agree with you it does not take taht much to at least say something like you wrote. Hey I can't get back to you at the moment I will text later or tomorrow, etc etc

ATuairiscean · Answer

It falls into the depends category - Couple of hours is valid - Couple of days you are being binned off.

Z-Spark · Answer

No, no one is that busy even trump is not that busy shit it takes like 2 seconds

Eridan · Answer

It's a good excuse for not texting back in a metter or minutes or hours, not longer. Some of us can't be on their phones 24/7

apstraktna · Answer

Yes most of the time, it just depends on the situation the person is in :)

Anonymous · Answer

If it happens once in a while, the person can be truly busy. If it happens most of the time I would stay it’s in excuse. Not a very good one. Do the same to them. Or straight out ask if they want to text you.

NotJoeDirt · Answer

Someone is not too busy all day. They have breaks at work and school. If they have time to check Facebook, then they have time to respond to a text.

Descapla · Answer

Yeah. If you're doing something that's quite stressful or requires your full attention you may not always give the best response or take in a text fully.

Unit1 · Answer

Not this shit again. Social media is the new, modern cancer.

ssk55 · Answer

Is not being busy a good person so time is available in texting

TheChatWanderer · Answer

Dude if this is happening to you probably the bitch don't want you maybe if you were Tatum Channing it would be a different story.

TunisianDom93 · Answer

it is not an excuse and I stopped texting people because they used that "expression"

Naydyonov · Answer

Yes. When I work I don't check my phone, so often I'll text back only the next day

huckleberryhound · Answer

Nope, my thoughts exactly

Artemisia8 · Answer

Yes, or pretending to sleep

cupidkisses · Answer

It os not a good excuse

TonyRyanAgain · Answer

I work a very busy job so yeah, sometimes.

myusernameislong · Answer

Excuses don't give results

Anonymous · Answer

The sleeping bullshit as well.

Is being "busy" a good excuse for not texting back?

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