The guy that I've been talking to thinks he's a downgrade after seeing a pic of my ex. my ex is a narc. he knows this, what do I do?

ok, so the thing is, we were skyping one night, and i was telling him how i found a pic someone photoshopped of my ex where they put a dick in his hand, making it seem like he was jerking someone off (it was pretty funny) and i showed him the picture.

he knows my ex boyfriend is a narcissistic psychopath, but he never saw a pic of my ex, anyway he saw it and he went, "Daaanngg Sara, thats your ex?" and he repeated it 3 times, i was shocked cause i thought "oh does he know him?" so then he says "Dang im the downgrade.", i said "No, No, you're actually an upgrade." he said "yeah but, im a downgrade, look at him... he's handsome." i told him "i know but he was an asshole." he then said "i know that but, daannggg duuddee".

this guy im talking to right now is super fucking sweet, i don't care for looks and all i care about is their personality. i feel like this guy is the one for me, and i wouldn't change a damn thing about him.

he makes me laugh, he's sweet, he's super down to earth, and he always brings a smile to my face. to me he is in NO WAY a "Downgrade". i love him just the way he is.

the great thing about this thing i am with him, is that we met through memes and our lame sense of humour. to me he will always be better than my ex.
okay so to the part that says "i know, but he was an asshole" i in no way called the guy im talking to ugly, that wasn't my intention, so thank you for pointing out my mistake, and to my ex wasn't just an ass, he was downright scary, and abusive, there were times where he would threaten to kill all my male friends and even threatened to kill himself if i ever left, but then made me feel like i was going crazy, cause he said i made all those things up when i had proof he had said those things.
and my ex* not "and to my ex"


Most Helpful Guy

  • Umm ok. This is normal and he will be paranoid. Narcissists can be VERY attractive.

    (1) DO NOT MENTION THIS TO HIM EVER AGAIN/do not bring up your ex-bf or anything ANYMORE.
    (2) Fine, your new boyfriend may not be the same in the looks department. But it's your job to make sure he feels like it - especially now that you created this unhealthy scenario. So make sure you show him that you like him for him


Most Helpful Girl

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What Guys Said 5

  • "I know but he was an asshole"
    You basically called your dude ugly and you're not with the other dude just cause he's an ass.

    • i didn't call him ugly, but thanks for pointing out my mistake.

    • A better reply would've been "you're the on for me, that's all that matters" if you don't wanna admit that he's attractive.

  • "to me he will always be better than my ex"

    just tell him that.

  • The last three paragraphs should be sent to him.

  • It sounds more like he was joking.

  • But your Ex is more handsome, so that's more important

    • no, just cause he's handsome doesn't mean he's a better person. looks shouldn't even matter, what matters is a persons personality. like he could be one of the prettiest people in the world, BUT he'll always have an ugly personality. soooo

    • Show All
    • If your ex is more handsome, then yes, you downgraded

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