Wow that is an excellent explanation of how it works!
I try. Thank you.
OMG I know right! You took the words right out of my mouth.
It's baffling. Should've paid more attention in Biology and Chemistry classes LOL
Nope. Sorry. I took those classes. They didn't teach any of that sh! t; otherwise, I would have been paying attention! 😂
@Guardian45 Even if they had I was sleeping. lol
Hahahaha, @Guarduan45 and @coachTanthony after I sent the comments on Science Classes, if they mentioned anything about Sex or Human Attraction I wouldve peeked up paid attention Audio Record and took very good notes... I would still have those notes today... LOL
coachTanthony, thank you for the MHO.
Spot on! 💯
Thanks for the MHO
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Okay so you are saying you can't help who you are attracted too but it's a choice to act on it?
Oh no. You CAN HELP who you're attracted to AS well as it is a choice to act on it or not. ^^ It solely depends on one's REASONS for the attraction. For me, I am an observer by nature. My reason for attraction is solely based on what is natural to judge a person's level of attractiveness. But other's reasons can and usually are based on sex and lust. Those are not mine. I can notice a person, acknowledge their attractiveness and then move on. Why? Because it's not important. Other people see somebody they find sexually attracted and wants to hookup right away. Why? Because that's their intentions and mindset. We are built and designed to know these things. But how we choose to base our attraction is simply the choices we make and what we're exposed to throughout our lives.
Well alright.. . thanks for the comment!
I have seen people who immediately didn't like a person's looks, but once the other changed their appearance, all of a sudden it drew the other person in. Gene can only do but so much. But our upbringing, being exposed to sexual perversion early as it happened to me, getting bad advice from friends, other family members, etc can greatly shape who we want to be attracted to and who we do not want to be attracted to.
Our of genuine curiosity, would that mean someone who's gay choose to be straight?
Of course! I seen and known people who choose to go for the same sex because they grew tired and scared of the opposite sex and vice versa. People can change and not everybody is so called born the way they are. We put a label on it and now it confuses people and it becomes common practice. This is why so many of them even when they find others like them, are still confused and seek acceptance for the practice.
Your mind interprets the image your optical nerves relay in as appealing to look at which sparks interest innately.You don’t consciously think I find that person attractive until after the subconscious act of doing so first
You clearly don't know men.
Asker meant why do you accept him, as opposed to domeone you dont: How free are your choices/thoughts?
I dont think it is. Sure we have some ideas of what we want and why, based on logic, interests and needs. But most of it isn't really a choice in my opinion.
I'm sorry I accidentally touched dislike. By the way, I'm interested in your rambling. Or maybe, could you please share me a reference/study/research?
I'd need a bit more information, which part are you looking to be cited? Since various aspects are built upon the others, but were still addressed in separate papers.
When a person is attracted to someone, what happens to the body? What chemicals play in this situation? How? As far as I know it's related to 3 layer in a brain. The lowest layer (reptile) produces some hormones to make you desire, the top layer (human) controls your actions. Something like that.I've read from somewhere but I'd like to have more references.
Not being attracted to people is definitely not a choice. I'm not attracted to the majority of the population and it makes me resent myself.
Why? Because you don't feel like you're giving them a chance?
Not being attracted to the majority of the population is not a bad thing and is no reason to resent yourself.
Why would you resent yourself?
Because it seems I'm only attracted to people who are toxic to me.And can't be attracted to the ones with the best intentions no matter how strong the emotional connection is.
I can relate. Don't feel bad that's actually quite common.
Okay I guess. You lost me man and I do this shit for a living. lol
Lol, sorry. I don't know, guess I just explained how I see it. You can choose some attractions but others are natural. That's all I meant
Alright fair enough man! Thanks for the comments!
I don't think physical attraction is a necessity, I hate this attraction, at normal times it's ok but whenever a super cute, beautiful, sexy, etc. Just get my feeling.. comes in contact with my eyes I just Rome around that like a mad man. It ok for me to have attraction, but when it becomes necessity then, (actually, it's just a imaginary story, I have more imp works than girls) when some super ___ were to approach, I would rome behind her through out the city to get details about her. It's it the worst thing to be physical attraction to be necessity. ... I do look forward for replay and having a conversation
@rushabp To me, it just feels like something is missing if there isn't at least some degree of physical attraction. I've tried to make it work with an otherwise great guy before and it never did.
I don't know which age group u r from...But let me rephrase it for uU r having attraction but u r searching for love...U seem to be searching for a person to have love whom u can spend a lot of time...U will not understand it... I know... it's the thing that everybody may be telling u...I will try to explain(If not for my mood u would have definitely understood it) Let's start with the general definitions.. just get the feeling...Attraction: it's the desire to have sex.Love: it's the feeling, such as care, affection, admiration, etc.In simple words, it's the feeling for respect and care...What u seem to lacking is that feeling of respect and care..If u understand it, I know u will find a guy who is handsome, smart, respect and cares about u...Trust me, it's very hard to find a complete perfect guy.If u do want a bf/ partner u just need to find a guy who respects and cares about u..It's the secret of having a good relationship... if u don't, it will never last forever..Hey, don't get it wrong, but I wonder what type of girl u r, i would like to chat with u, as u are keeping the identity hidden u will never talk to me even when I promised that I would not develop any relationship (common case scenario)Guess what, even u r not interested in personal chat, we can talk keeping both of us keeping identities hidden..Let me clear onc thing for u, I am already engaged, for the crazy and weird thinking of ladies
One more, if u want to talk just talk if not don't talk, I am just happy helping someone
I forget to tell u one more thing, if both the parties are not understandable to each other and don't accept each other's views, then the relationship will go from good to bad.. just get the feelings...U can consider this to be a second point/priority to build a good relationship
@rushabp I don't lack any feeling of respect and care, and I'm not looking for anyone perfect. But if I have zero physical attraction to someone at all, it just won't work. I'm weird enough about physical stuff as it is, but it feels wrong when it's with someone you have no attraction to. It always feels like there's something missing. I don't expect a guy to be knockout handsome, just remotely physically attractive in my eyes, which can be average to a lot of people.
U kept me thing for half an hour...I wonder which environment u r living in..In my town, the boys try to show respect, care and affection when they like a girl there choice is always a random girl, Here is the thing, girls here knows that it's a physical relationship which can lost longer than expected if the girl wished, What max of them do is prefer studies than having a physical relationship. Girls that I saw have no desire to have a boyfriend.As for the boys, Even when the they r rejected on the very next day I found them proposing another girl. Moral of the story, boys in my town (don't know about other town), just want a physical relationship. I have seen two types of couples,1) only need physical relationship ( heard lots of stories from my friends)2) loyal and have the will to keep the relationship at longer duration of time. The girls here r so obsessed with the studies that my few of my have performed a failed suicide attempt, actually my friends were madly in love with themHere's the common factor, they were beautiful, smart, intelligent, good at sports and studies, Lacks no respect and carelessness. (If u r similar characteristic. Then, instead of approaching someone, let them come to u. The classic scene where a boy proposes a girl.Don't u think it's better)Well I don't know if it will help but it is what happens near meU seem to obsessed with having a boyfriend, I don't know why u obsessed butReasons may vary from person to person I possible reason that I found is "My all friends have one bf/gf , so I want one"If u r jealous, don't be jealous, Just be yourself Don't get me wrong, I just felt that u r jealous. So, I said it.It's common to have bf/gf in foreign countries specifically in newer generations, not having one is a problem.
@rushabp I absolutely am not obsessed with having a boyfriend, lol. I've been single for nearly 4 years by choice. I have no jealousy issues and don't care whether my friends are in relationships or not. I've found out that it isn't for me for multiple reasons.
I give u...If u were to find that missing thing, please do share with me..
half and half? you mean like 50% chance or rain and sunshine today?
No; half of it comes naturally and the other half is a choice.
You're supposed to let it happen on its own. Once the personality is developed, supposedly around age 25, it's presumed constant until an environmental shock is introduced.
Dude, you sound conflicted. Please speak to someone. I had a therapist who helped me a lot.
Yeah okay I am with ya on that!
I think you are attracted to who you attracted too... it's not a choice for me or them. So not sure what you mean.
I was comparing each in logical statements.x = gay / lesbian / etcy = straightx + choice in partner = sexualityy + choice in partner = sexualityI don't think we can say attraction in hetero relationships (your pic) are a choice any more than gay people choose who they are attracted to.
I think everyone no matter gay or straight chooses a partner of their liking. I don't think that is in question. What I am saying is... I believe attraction isn't a choice. So if I am attracted to Scott then I will choose him as a partner. If I am attracted to Missy then I will choose her as a partner. That is if they will have me of course. We can choose a partner who we are not attracted too I guess but that would be a very unfulfilling life. We might be on the same page here.. not sure.. help me out! Just talk to me like I am 5... I've been drinking a bit lol
I agree that attraction isn't a choice. I think many politically correct people will say that it is a choice though and stuff like "looks shouldn't matter." They are the same people that would be outraged if this was said against gay people though. That's my intuition.I agree with you totally. I think most of our attraction is based on genetics or their biology. There are some parts of what we find attractive that can be altered but those are subconscious anyway so we aren't actively choosing them.
Oh great.. okay so we are on the same page! Yeah I am with you bud!
Sounds good. Enjoy the cowboy game. I'm watching a replay of the Patriots (Tom won't be around forever).
Cowboys lost LOL
Ah bummer. Without Drew Breeze too
So true but Teddy brigdewater ain’t no slouch !
Attraction being a chemical reaction in the brain for that one particular person. I don't feel attraction for every young attractive woman on the planet!
ha ha ha good point!
Attraction is a chemical reaction in the brain for some people... a Ferrari or a nice watch is not the same thing man!
Women base a man's attractiveness on how she rates him socially, financially, physically, and other objectifying traits. Which is why many women will say they "grew to love" a guy they thought was ugly when they met him.Women also find a males ability to get other female attention as a measure of attraction.So an attractive guy who is broke with no job and other women seem to avoid would not be as attractive to other women as a not so attractive guy with lost of money, a good job/status, and women around him all the time.This has been tested time and time again
You are using attractive differently then the question asked. Is this job attractive to me in Dallas because it pays more? YES I am talking about when someone sees somebody... are they sexually attracted to them. If the guy is rich that doesn't mean she is sexually attractive to him... maybe attractive as a long term partner if money is what she cares about! Sorry for the confusion.
Well yes and no. I am talking about physical as well since women begin to find men more attractive the more she gets to know him and like him. Unlike men who are visually stimulated and are drawn to women based on that alone.Women can see a guy and think he is attractive physically until he speaks and they lose that attraction completely
Agree to disagree man! Thanks for the comments!
You just blew my mind LOL.
Well... What i meant is that I have no choice of what I find minimally adequate but everything else after is just some bullshit image of them I chose to make up inside my head and barely has anything to do with them in reality. A pretty voluntary delusion.
I feel ya bro.. your original answer was like a weatherman.. 50% chance of rain today 50% chance of sun LOL.