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No, no one should date someone severely depressed. When someone is severely depressed they aren't mentally ok to be a good partner and be in a relationship. On the other hand, no one should date someone depressed "to help them", lead by compassion. You should support as much as you can as a friend, but is a therapist and not a lover or a friend the one that should mainly help the depressed.
However if the severe depression happens when they already were in love, the story is a bit different. Or if they are already going to therapy. Or if it's a slight depression and seems to acknowledge well their situation and have some sort of control over their demons.
I guess so, I mean their is medication for it right? As long as they keep up with meds and going to counseling on top of that, then it should be fine. However, I do wonder if the drugs would have any negative effects on their body, like say they get better and we decide to have kids... i just hope that wouldn't effect the baby in any way.
In all honesty. No, I can't stand someone who is mad and sad all the time. I've gone through depression and everytime I see or hear someone talking about suicide or something extremely worse, it triggers me and... i just can't. It ruins my mood and that will be the thing I will be thinking about all day.
Not a good thing to do for any of the involved.
Wait until depression isn't present for the moment.
Personal do I not date when I'm depressed or sad since we humans have a tendency to be bad judge of character and the same with decisions.
An other thing is that we give shitty vibes, tends to drain others of energy.
The same goes for dating someone with depression.
Personal do I recommend to deal with your decision and do thing's that makes you get control over it (that usually makes us get rid of it) .
What *kind* of severe depression?
Are you meaning bipolar (sometimes called manic depression), acute anxiety disorder, post traumatic stress disorder, or even something like borderline personality disorder can exhibit the same symptoms as depression.
Or do you mean any depression in general? If so, then yes. People are damaged, so why shouldn't we love one another?
Say it was manic depression
@Lindseyromeo In that case, yes, I would still date them, but would also try to help them through the more "manic" times, which usually require psychotherapy, if not medication. Love is selfless, right? Where do we draw that line, and even if the relationship fails, and they move on... what if they were better for the time, and brought more joy to the world? That is time well spent.
IF you're not a psychiatric or psychological professional, you cannot help someone through manic depression: they need therapy and medication. If they are taking none and getting none, they will not get significantly better and will be unstable: not candidates for healthy relationships.
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I am a victim of depression. And I've been in 2 relationships. I would say , no , because from my experience, I tended to depend on them to fill that empty void. But in reality it should be me. Someone who suffers from depression should take care of themselves first.
yes but question is would you? I mean many of us out there who have severe depression and anxiety, are the more understanding and never judge those who are sufferers of such issues... instead we tend to spot the signs and know what it's like so we tend to be more supportive as we can easily relate
I don't think so because I unknowingly did one time and three months in she would have these episodes where she would freak out and tell me she wanted to kill herself. It was really hard.
Plus I'm a really positive person so I don't see that working out. I would support someone if they had acute depression but long-term severe depression would be too much I think.
I tried to at one point. I discovered that it was a constant drain on me that I couldn't handle. I made the mistake of trying to be the one to "save" her and it caused me to make a lot of foolish decisions that hurt her and me. I don't have what it takes to love someone who suffers from severe depression in the way they truly need to be loved.
I'm presuming that I KNOW before hand, or after date #1, that this person has SEVERE depression.
So... Absolutely not. To the 43% (so far) who say "yes", I ask have you ---- ever been around a
SEVERELY depressed person for any length of time? It's like watching a train wreck, over and over and over again.
I have and that is why I clicked no, but I would try to help them. And over the course of 2 or 3 months they get better then maybe I would date them.
@fionaglenanne And what makes you think you're qualified to help a clinically, severely depressed person?
I'm not... but my father is a psychiatrist
@fionaglenanne Well your father isn't going to be dating the person, so you're not really equipped to handle a severely depressed individual on your own, other than to be as "nice" as you can be. Unfortunately, that alone doesn't address the nature of someone's deep depression.
good point
@fionaglenanne I understand wanting to help, but it's a very, very complex thing to tackle.
Honestly, no. I don't want to get depressed along with them which would happen because I'm pretty unstable. I would definitely try to get them help tho and if they overcome it who knows we might get together later.
depends on why they are depressed. If they are sad because their wife or girlfriend died then maybe I would. If they are sad because they think they have a horrible life, and they themselves (the person) is not doing anything to help himself then No.
I have to be really honest here, I would not be able to date someone with severe depression. Because I really feel like people should first love themselves and then go on to the next step. However I would do my best to help her out of the depression, all the little things count and time is the only thing that heals.
If someone is experiencing current severe depression, they are not in a state of mind that is conducive to dating. They need to be encouraged to get help, if they are not already doing so.
No. The only reason why is because their emotions would be contagious. I would feel horrible because they're depressed and I don't want to feel that way since I'm a genuinely happy person.
I don't date because I have depression and some medical issues. I don't want to spread the joy...
I wouldn't date them BECAUSE they have depression. I'd date them if they're a great person overall. The mental illness is just one part of them, not the definition of what they're like as a person.
No, they are emotional vampires who cannot truly see you due to the magnitude of their issues.
It sounds harsh but that is the reality.
Not true.
Depends little on what kind of depression and how that person works.
But the energy part is spot on.
They get a different way of seeing thing and tends to become narrow minded, also tends to get pure judgment and decision making. very common with selfishness. even harder to see what they are and contribute with.
Little to many tend to look for quick sex often. especially female's.
I have chronic depression and on medication along with therapy. If they're managing their symptoms and are trying to get better, then yes.
@crazy8000 I do yoga everyday and I take vitamins that were recommended to me by my doctor. I simply have a chemical imbalance in my brain. Don't speak about something you know so little about
I'd be friends with them just fine, but dating, that depends on whether they were seeking help or not and how well they were coping.
No, unless I was in the relationship prior. It would be too much of a toil on my own health and would become toxic.
No. I can be a friend. If that person cannot love themselves first, they won't be in the condition to love other people.
Considering I have it myself we can be fucked up together
I believe that if you are capable of authentically loving someone, and not just what you can get from them or what they can do for you, then yes. You/I can date someone severely depressed if we are sincere.
To be honest I'll take what I can get. But seriously, what if I'm the border between them and suicide?
What if they felt like they had nothing to live for and I end up being what they live for?
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