How do you stop self-sabotaging in a relationship? (Page 2)

Anonymous · 2020-03-07T09:45:30Z

I have been dating a while but technically not a relationship yet because I keep holding back because I can't except good things happening to me. Objectively speaking it's going great. He tells me evertime he is crazy about me and how attractive he thinks I am. But I am instinctively searching for bad things. Like he tells me I look great, I get self conscious and don't feel pretty at all. I am looking for my flaws immediately and it keeps me from opening up. I think there are so many prettier girls he could go for and maybe will if he finds them. Or when he compliments me otherwise. I play down every compliment and don't allow myself to feel good about them. I am afraid in the long run if I accept all these nice things it will be taken away anyway and I will be worse off after. I know it's unreasonable but still I feel like this. I have self acceptance issues so I think I don't deserve good things happening to me. But I like this guy and he says he likes me too and If I could accept this thing it would be one of the best that happened to me in ages. How do I stop my destructive way of thinking?

Anonymous

(25-29)

Post Opinion

1 likes

What Girls & Guys Said

Opinion

Show Popular Opinions(20)

Hazelstar Follow
Xper 6 Age: 27

+1 y

Self love and realize your self-worth.

0

0 Reply
Anonymous
(36-45)

+1 y

Simple... stop choosing to.

1

2 Reply
- Thisgirl23
  
  +1 y
  Yeah because that’s how it works idiot. Self sabotaging is associated with a number of things. Past trauma, childhood experience you can’t just stop because it’s a psychological issue.
  
  Reply
- Mickey9999
  
  +1 y
  He’s right. Blunt but right. Now that she sees her pattern and what she’s doing, she halfway there. Now she needs to decide to stop... counseling will be a great tool to discover why and how to deal with the anxiety she probably feels and why she won’t accept good things. But it’s not just going to happen without a lot of work and effort and self discovery on her part. It’s like an alcoholic choosing not to drink every day... she needs to not listen to her negative thoughts and to choose to trust again. Because not every man is her ex that caused her distrust issues.
  
  Reply
VaheK39 Follow
Xper 3 Age: 25

+1 y

How long you're dating for

0

0 Reply

Home > Dating > Questions > How do you stop self-sabotaging in a relationship?

How do you stop self-sabotaging in a relationship? (Page 2)

What Girls & Guys Said

We're glad to see you liked this post.