You were maybe a little harsh, but he should have worded that better. Now if he was asking you to get color contacts or whatever a few months into the relationship or mentioned stuff like that a lot then I would say dump him. It's possible that he didn't even realize what he was saying could be hurtful and was trying to spin it as a weird compliment. Then again, I obviously don't know what his tone was like or how he said it to make a true judgment. If you think you did the right thing and are content with your choice to break up then that's all that matters.
You are a complete and utter dumbass forgive my French if you go back to this man he is a shallow shallow can be if you go back to Someone Like This then you deserve the treatment that he will put on you down the road first of all you need to realize what he didn't say and did say.
I completely agree with you. Of course he thinks you are attractive, other wise he probably wouldn't be dating you. But making such comments about physical attributes is not acceptable. I am petite and if I guy I am dating with told me he would prefeer me being taller, that would make me feel terrible, even if I have no insecurity about my height in the first place.
not harsh but a bit childish , you 18 now things are gonna start changing and you have to be prepared for it, acting like that is not gonna get you want you want in life. you have to have a cooler head n your shoulders. even if your 24 it still the same message.
Why would you want a partner that points out things that he doesn’t like about you? That’s not being childish. Your partner is supposed to make you feel good about yourself, not shame you for the colour of your freaking eyes.
@AmourHoney i like to have a blunt partner that will tell me both sides f the relationship love AND hate , just having it one way has yoou living with lies which can lead too other things. which would you really rather have? a guy who lies too you or a guy who can be honest so you will see him for who he is?
There’s a difference between being blunt and making someone feel bad for a physical feature they cannot change. If a guy is going to make me feel bad for something as simple as the colour of my eyes, then he’s an asshole and I don’t want him.
I hate those kinds of people xD they think humans are robots and they can just pick and choose parts, instead of accepting and loving the whole. You just dumped a shallow ass, good for you!
Well, what he said was pretty silly, and kina insensitive.. But, y'all been datin for 2 months and it takes time to develop those type of feelins.. I get why you got upset at that.. I think y'all should have at least had a discussion about it, and if he stuck to the idiotic belief about his eyes then I could see lettin him go.. I just think it was hasty but at the same time i understand it..
As someone who got similar comments about my appearance from an ex boyfriend, I think you did the right thing. It might sound petty now but if you stayed with him then you would have suffered in the long run if he didn't change his attitude.
Lmao. Yeah i've always preferred girls with big tits would be great if you had them but oh well = to what he said What a fucking idiot. I love green eyes but why on earth would i say it like that. Also thinking of your babies to be perfect just cause they have an eye color is fucking dumb. Nevermind that's not how genes work his babies could come out not blue anyway.
Is the opposite, you are respecting yourself! Respect is something basic and elementary in a relationship. You deserve love, respect, and someone who sees beyond superficial things.
He sounds immature as fuck. It appears you have given the boy a lesson in life. Still you gotta wonder why he's so fixated on colors. Something tells me you should stay away. Really dark brown eyes and blonde hair is my favorite ;)
Way to go punish honest guys, no wonder all you will ever get is dishonest guys. So you don't match his perfect girl, wakeup it's unlikely that you ever will. So yes you where wrong dumping him for that, he wasn't shallow and just dating blue eyed women after all, so you had a chance and blew it because you didn't like his honesty.
No he states facts and preferences and that is neutral. He would have been shallow if he would have rejected her because of it. She is shallow because she reject him because she doesn't match his dreamgirl. We don't choose what we get attracted to. We are short minded if it let completely control our choices. She chose to be offended by the fact that she doesn't hit perfect score and take extreme action. She needs to take a step back and think about what message she is sending out by being so easily offended.
You make 0 sense. Preferences aren't neutral it is shallow, all human beings are shallow anw. She isn't shallow, she is insecure. She has the right to be insecure because the way he stated it makes her feel like she is not good enough. There is a way in stating it and the way he said it was stupid and offensive and childish even. He could have said regardless of my preference I am attracted to you. And not " I would be 10x prettier if my eyes were blue like his"
Preference are only shallow if they are hard requirements not if it's just what put value on the scale between drop dead gorgeous and horribly ugly. Her insecurities are her problem not his, so they don't justify her actions just explains them. So her actions are still wrong, if your insecurities is in the way of you having a honest relationship you need to work on them instead of lashing out and claim to be a victim. In this situation she overreacted and women like her is what causes dishonest men. If they can't say their honest opinion you will make them silent or dishonest.
And preferences are facts not something good or bad by nature. You can't claim that liking brunettes more then blonds is better then the reverse. At least not from a global perspective, from a personal it changes depending on where you end up and the number of potential matches, there is after all more natural brunettes then blonds, If no one had preferences, the world would be very systematic.
sure it's your prerogative, but you might want to hear him out and accept his apology. Guys often say stupid things and if you like him for more than his interest or disinterest in your eye color, you may want to reconsider the break up. seems a little extreme to break up over one stupid comment.
Ya could have responded I like your eyes as blue and mine as brown cause it makes us unique. Rather than break up. You could also point out having different eye colors could also mean your kid could potentially get Heterochromia. Which would look really cute.
But of course now ya kinda just gotta live with what you chose.
If he wants a woman with blue eyes, he can go find one, he doesn't have to make her feel shit about it. She wasn't the one complaining, he was, so why does she have to prove to him that she is pretty? please xD
@bakingperfectionist if you don't show that you love a guy he's just going to assume you're not worth any effort and I hate saying this but guys notice and take notes when girls say they have had 2+ guys and never made it work. Its like if you're that focused on just letting guys go why should I put effort into the relationship that will probably just end with you saying its not worth it to stay. FOREVER alone type of shit.
Sure walking away is always an option but at a certain point if you can't keep a guy period and you just keep walking out of relationships you're no better than the other extreme of MGTOW that guys do.
What in Gods name are you on about xD She deserves someone who thinks she looks good just the way she is. The world doesn't revolve around men and what they want. I would rather end up alone than with a shallow loser :) sorry if women having standards plays offends you
@bakingperfectionist Standards only go so far if you corner yourself in a situation where guys are going to assume you're just using them for the money and sex.
@bakingperfectionist My point is that her choice was EXTREME for what the situation was. Whether men or women like it rumors do spread. Especially when it comes to relationships what is done is done but. I wouldn't put it past the boyfriend if the game of telephone doesn't catch up to her.
mate did you read her question? He literally told her she would look better with other features. Thats disrespectful, shallow and rude. He deserved what he got. It wasn't extreme; his comment was telling of his shallow personality and therefore his morals didn't match hers. Just say you're also a shallow man and move on lol
@bakingperfectionist Takes two to tango if you want a relationship if all you do is run when things get tense you're never going to find a keeper or be a keeper. Is my argument.
@bakingperfectionist If you want to be known as a "runner" go ahead but its going to send the wrong message if your new other half ever finds out your relationship history.
If it takes 2 to tango, why isn't he playing his role and being respectful? it seems to me you just want the woman to take all the disrespect. You're clearly a moron so I will end this here. I would rather be alone than with a shallow asshole; welcome to the 21st century.
@bakingperfectionist Well communication and respect goes hand in hand and in ways if you're just running from explaining why something is wrong your just exasperating the problems women are going to have.
Sure cold hard logically yeah men can always numbers wise find another but. if women don't take the time to explain why something isn't correct men are just going to keep following their habit. Its like the problem with modern feminists and how they demand so much that men change but after bringing up issues. They never give a solution they want guys to even attempt to try. Instead its the constant buzz of men toxicity which then men just walk away.
If you want to make change ya gotta actually influence it.
No. I am not your mother to tell you what you should change. Women aren't put on this earth to raise you. You either know how to treat a woman or you end up alone. I can guarantee she will find someone else within a week and he will constantly be being broken up with for being an idiot. Don't worry about her :) pretty girls are never lonely. Shallow men always end up crying over the one that got away. Grow up or stay single. Women aren't raising grown men in 2020. Raise your damn selves.
First of all I dont see any women begging for guys on here xD second, they're asking where all the MEN are, not shallow little boys who don't know right from wrong and need their mommies to teach them basic respect. She will forget this douche existed within a week :)
He wants you back. Give him another chance. Yes, he said something stupid, but he's sorry. And the fact that he wants you back and he's pleading for forgiveness is proof that he really does like you. I mean, you can punish him a little, but I think you should give him another chance. He probably won't be saying anything stupid like that again.
Wow, do such idiots still exist? You did well. Confused at all guys saying you are overacting. I guess they want girls to be prepared for receiving negative comments from them at anytime, and don't even show a reaction and stay oppressed. Yikes.
You did the right thing. He’s trying to shove Eurocentric beauty standards onto you. I don’t understand men at all. He should just get with someone with blue eyes. Why did he waste your time in the first place?
No, he was honest when he said it. I'm skeptical about the apology. You did the right thing. He can find a blue-eyed woman to date.
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Anonymous
(25-29)
+1 y
I dont think you did the wrong thing. If youd been dating for years and broke up over that, it would be a little much (although he'd deserve a slap) But he was honest, and clearly only regrets what he said because of the consequence. You can do better
He said a very ridiculous thing but you dumping him just for that sounds even more ridiculous to be honest. To be fair, a man who says such things unironically does not sound very mature but dumping someone over such a small thing does not sound very mature either.
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You were maybe a little harsh, but he should have worded that better. Now if he was asking you to get color contacts or whatever a few months into the relationship or mentioned stuff like that a lot then I would say dump him. It's possible that he didn't even realize what he was saying could be hurtful and was trying to spin it as a weird compliment. Then again, I obviously don't know what his tone was like or how he said it to make a true judgment. If you think you did the right thing and are content with your choice to break up then that's all that matters.
You are a complete and utter dumbass forgive my French if you go back to this man he is a shallow shallow can be if you go back to Someone Like This then you deserve the treatment that he will put on you down the road
first of all you need to realize what he didn't say and did say.
I completely agree with you. Of course he thinks you are attractive, other wise he probably wouldn't be dating you. But making such comments about physical attributes is not acceptable. I am petite and if I guy I am dating with told me he would prefeer me being taller, that would make me feel terrible, even if I have no insecurity about my height in the first place.
not harsh but a bit childish , you 18 now things are gonna start changing and you have to be prepared for it, acting like that is not gonna get you want you want in life. you have to have a cooler head n your shoulders. even if your 24 it still the same message.
Why would you want a partner that points out things that he doesn’t like about you? That’s not being childish. Your partner is supposed to make you feel good about yourself, not shame you for the colour of your freaking eyes.
@AmourHoney i like to have a blunt partner that will tell me both sides f the relationship love AND hate , just having it one way has yoou living with lies which can lead too other things. which would you really rather have? a guy who lies too you or a guy who can be honest so you will see him for who he is?
There’s a difference between being blunt and making someone feel bad for a physical feature they cannot change. If a guy is going to make me feel bad for something as simple as the colour of my eyes, then he’s an asshole and I don’t want him.
@AmourHoney no there not being blunt is supposed to make you feel bad and hurt at times and make you laugh. its a double edged sword.
no, not if it’s a physical feature somebody can’t change. That’s just being a jerk, end of story.
@AmourHoney we can talk more when you calm down , you clearly to upset to talk rationally
Uh what makes you think that I’m not calm? Wtf just because I don’t agree with you doesn’t mean I’m not calm dude 😂💀
@AmourHoney i know just picking with you lol , its Friday , 3 day weekend and all
I hate those kinds of people xD they think humans are robots and they can just pick and choose parts, instead of accepting and loving the whole. You just dumped a shallow ass, good for you!
Well, what he said was pretty silly, and kina insensitive.. But, y'all been datin for 2 months and it takes time to develop those type of feelins.. I get why you got upset at that.. I think y'all should have at least had a discussion about it, and if he stuck to the idiotic belief about his eyes then I could see lettin him go.. I just think it was hasty but at the same time i understand it..
As someone who got similar comments about my appearance from an ex boyfriend, I think you did the right thing. It might sound petty now but if you stayed with him then you would have suffered in the long run if he didn't change his attitude.
Lmao. Yeah i've always preferred girls with big tits would be great if you had them but oh well = to what he said What a fucking idiot. I love green eyes but why on earth would i say it like that. Also thinking of your babies to be perfect just cause they have an eye color is fucking dumb. Nevermind that's not how genes work his babies could come out not blue anyway.
Sounds a little racist too maybe?
Very well so.
Is the opposite, you are respecting yourself!
Respect is something basic and elementary in a relationship. You deserve love, respect, and someone who sees beyond superficial things.
He sounds immature as fuck. It appears you have given the boy a lesson in life. Still you gotta wonder why he's so fixated on colors. Something tells me you should stay away. Really dark brown eyes and blonde hair is my favorite ;)
Way to go punish honest guys, no wonder all you will ever get is dishonest guys. So you don't match his perfect girl, wakeup it's unlikely that you ever will. So yes you where wrong dumping him for that, he wasn't shallow and just dating blue eyed women after all, so you had a chance and blew it because you didn't like his honesty.
He is shallow and mean for mentioning it because he is criticising an attribute she can't change.
No he states facts and preferences and that is neutral. He would have been shallow if he would have rejected her because of it. She is shallow because she reject him because she doesn't match his dreamgirl. We don't choose what we get attracted to. We are short minded if it let completely control our choices. She chose to be offended by the fact that she doesn't hit perfect score and take extreme action. She needs to take a step back and think about what message she is sending out by being so easily offended.
You make 0 sense.
Preferences aren't neutral it is shallow, all human beings are shallow anw.
She isn't shallow, she is insecure.
She has the right to be insecure because the way he stated it makes her feel like she is not good enough.
There is a way in stating it and the way he said it was stupid and offensive and childish even.
He could have said regardless of my preference I am attracted to you.
And not " I would be 10x prettier if my eyes were blue like his"
Ow and for " she isn't shallow she is insecure"
I meant in this context
Preference are only shallow if they are hard requirements not if it's just what put value on the scale between drop dead gorgeous and horribly ugly. Her insecurities are her problem not his, so they don't justify her actions just explains them. So her actions are still wrong, if your insecurities is in the way of you having a honest relationship you need to work on them instead of lashing out and claim to be a victim. In this situation she overreacted and women like her is what causes dishonest men. If they can't say their honest opinion you will make them silent or dishonest.
And preferences are facts not something good or bad by nature. You can't claim that liking brunettes more then blonds is better then the reverse. At least not from a global perspective, from a personal it changes depending on where you end up and the number of potential matches, there is after all more natural brunettes then blonds, If no one had preferences, the world would be very systematic.
I really don't have the patience to read all that so moving on 😂👋🏿
sure it's your prerogative, but you might want to hear him out and accept his apology. Guys often say stupid things and if you like him for more than his interest or disinterest in your eye color, you may want to reconsider the break up. seems a little extreme to break up over one stupid comment.
Ya could have responded I like your eyes as blue and mine as brown cause it makes us unique. Rather than break up. You could also point out having different eye colors could also mean your kid could potentially get Heterochromia. Which would look really cute.
But of course now ya kinda just gotta live with what you chose.
If he wants a woman with blue eyes, he can go find one, he doesn't have to make her feel shit about it. She wasn't the one complaining, he was, so why does she have to prove to him that she is pretty? please xD
@bakingperfectionist if you don't show that you love a guy he's just going to assume you're not worth any effort and I hate saying this but guys notice and take notes when girls say they have had 2+ guys and never made it work. Its like if you're that focused on just letting guys go why should I put effort into the relationship that will probably just end with you saying its not worth it to stay. FOREVER alone type of shit.
Sure walking away is always an option but at a certain point if you can't keep a guy period and you just keep walking out of relationships you're no better than the other extreme of MGTOW that guys do.
What in Gods name are you on about xD She deserves someone who thinks she looks good just the way she is. The world doesn't revolve around men and what they want. I would rather end up alone than with a shallow loser :) sorry if women having standards plays offends you
@bakingperfectionist Standards only go so far if you corner yourself in a situation where guys are going to assume you're just using them for the money and sex.
I think you have issues and you didn't even read the question.
@bakingperfectionist My point is that her choice was EXTREME for what the situation was. Whether men or women like it rumors do spread. Especially when it comes to relationships what is done is done but. I wouldn't put it past the boyfriend if the game of telephone doesn't catch up to her.
mate did you read her question? He literally told her she would look better with other features. Thats disrespectful, shallow and rude. He deserved what he got. It wasn't extreme; his comment was telling of his shallow personality and therefore his morals didn't match hers. Just say you're also a shallow man and move on lol
@bakingperfectionist Takes two to tango if you want a relationship if all you do is run when things get tense you're never going to find a keeper or be a keeper. Is my argument.
@bakingperfectionist If you want to be known as a "runner" go ahead but its going to send the wrong message if your new other half ever finds out your relationship history.
If it takes 2 to tango, why isn't he playing his role and being respectful? it seems to me you just want the woman to take all the disrespect. You're clearly a moron so I will end this here. I would rather be alone than with a shallow asshole; welcome to the 21st century.
@bakingperfectionist Well communication and respect goes hand in hand and in ways if you're just running from explaining why something is wrong your just exasperating the problems women are going to have.
Sure cold hard logically yeah men can always numbers wise find another but. if women don't take the time to explain why something isn't correct men are just going to keep following their habit. Its like the problem with modern feminists and how they demand so much that men change but after bringing up issues. They never give a solution they want guys to even attempt to try. Instead its the constant buzz of men toxicity which then men just walk away.
If you want to make change ya gotta actually influence it.
No. I am not your mother to tell you what you should change. Women aren't put on this earth to raise you. You either know how to treat a woman or you end up alone. I can guarantee she will find someone else within a week and he will constantly be being broken up with for being an idiot. Don't worry about her :) pretty girls are never lonely. Shallow men always end up crying over the one that got away. Grow up or stay single. Women aren't raising grown men in 2020. Raise your damn selves.
@bakingperfectionist If pretty women aren't ever lonely then why are there so many out here asking where the guys are at?
First of all I dont see any women begging for guys on here xD second, they're asking where all the MEN are, not shallow little boys who don't know right from wrong and need their mommies to teach them basic respect. She will forget this douche existed within a week :)
He wants you back. Give him another chance. Yes, he said something stupid, but he's sorry. And the fact that he wants you back and he's pleading for forgiveness is proof that he really does like you. I mean, you can punish him a little, but I think you should give him another chance. He probably won't be saying anything stupid like that again.
Wow, do such idiots still exist? You did well. Confused at all guys saying you are overacting. I guess they want girls to be prepared for receiving negative comments from them at anytime, and don't even show a reaction and stay oppressed. Yikes.
You did the right thing. He’s trying to shove Eurocentric beauty standards onto you. I don’t understand men at all. He should just get with someone with blue eyes. Why did he waste your time in the first place?
No, he was honest when he said it. I'm skeptical about the apology. You did the right thing. He can find a blue-eyed woman to date.
I dont think you did the wrong thing. If youd been dating for years and broke up over that, it would be a little much (although he'd deserve a slap)
But he was honest, and clearly only regrets what he said because of the consequence. You can do better
He said a very ridiculous thing but you dumping him just for that sounds even more ridiculous to be honest. To be fair, a man who says such things unironically does not sound very mature but dumping someone over such a small thing does not sound very mature either.
He could have worded it better.
You have overreacted and pulled the trigger like trigger happy.
But that's your business, not mine.