Girls, What do you honestly think of a 30 year old virgin?

[Anonymous]

Would you care if your 30 year old partner had
1. limited dating experience
2. very limited to no sexual experience

I have always been worried ill struggle finding anyone due to my lack of experience

Honest thoughts please?
feel free to ask me more questions if you need more details.

[Tiffany_Taylor_Made]

I would be very curious as to why he hadn't had sex yet because being a 30-year-old virgin is extremely unusual. Guys commonly lose their virginity around their later teen years or early 20s at the very most. If the 30-year-old virgin claimed that he was "waiting for marriage," I likely wouldn't believe him unless he comes from an extremely strict culture such as Islam. In America however or the Western world in general, hardly anybody is truly waiting for marriage in this era and many women tend to desire men with sexual experience. I believe virgins this old are likely to lack sex appeal or the confidence to approach women. For that reason, I don't think I could date a virgin that old because the chances are high that he is an unattractive weirdo. I can't think of any other reason a confident and attractive man would wait so long to have sex. As for whether or not you could find someone, don't lose hope.

If you have confidence and the social skills, no woman has to know that you're still a virgin. I wouldn't recommend telling her because many women are turned off by older virgins and you're not likely to find a virgin around your age group. When you do meet a girl, don't worry about how you perform. Just let the sex flow naturally and enjoy yourself. Sex should always feel like a fun activity, not a series of tasks. If, for whatever reason, she believes that you're a virgin during sex, or that you're not pleasing her in a way that she's used to, simply say that sex isn't the same with every girl and that you tend to improve the more you get used to having sex with them. If she doesn't say anything, don't tell her this, and don't ask. Worry about whether or not she wants to fuck again. If she comes back for more, then you're good.

[Asker]

Haha well for me its without a doubt due to being shy.. and social anxiety...

in the past I even had my crushes ask me out and I denied them out of fear? :P
so I know im not "unattractive"
maybe a bit of a social misfit though

[Tiffany_Taylor_Made]

@houseatreides: Yeah, that's something that you need to get over. It's weird to be shy at 30.

[Asker]

haha thats likely true

[Tiffany_Taylor_Made]

If you don't mind me asking, why are you so shy anyway?

[Asker]

I've also suffered some a lot of social anxiety
I can fake it pretty well at this point in my life

but in college/high school it was extremely difficult to deal with

RIGHT NOW
im just dealing with issues in my life that prevent me from having any real social life

[Tiffany_Taylor_Made]

@houseatreides: What I mean is there has to be some sort of reasons for this. What are those reasons? If they're personal and you don't want to discuss them publicly, you can DM me. If you don't want to go into detail at all, that's fine.

[Asker]

I guess you can message me if you want?

[AmandaYVR]

Just that they are very shy.
I don't look down on them. I just think they are unfortunately missing out on one of life's pleasures, both physically and emotionally being with other people.
The act of sex itself is made into more of a big deal sometimes than it needs to be. It's very easy and natural when you're in the moment. The hard part is meeting people and forming connections, and being on the same page.

[Asker]

yes im very shy :(

[bobalife]

I’d admire a guy who wants to save his virginity for someone special. It’s understandable that we all build our dating experiences at different stages in our life. Don’t doubt yourself. Some girls don’t mind it. However, personally I do prefer a guy who is more experience and can lead the relationship.

[Asker]

for me its more out of being shy

[menina]

I would have no issues with dating a 30 year old virgin. I'm a virgin myself and I won't lose my virginity until I'm in my 30's (no, I'm not waiting for marriage and I'm not religious).
I would just ask him some questions, I would like to know why he's a virgin and why he didn't have many dating experiences.

[Asker]

thank you!! :) I've always been very shy

[menina]

You're welcome! I'm also shy, so I understand you.

[blmoore6108289942]

IMHO it would be somewhat of a relief. There wouldn’t be so much pressure on sex, and more attention to emotional connection... it would be interesting really to see what ways other then sex that the two of would connect on! And when the time for sex came it would be more calculated and thought out rather then rushed because “it’s normal”. Overall I wouldn’t be bothered.

[Asker]

WEll for me, I think its largely out of social anxiety :(

[blmoore6108289942]

That’s expected. My social anxiety seems to get worse as I get older.

[Egirl28]

Inwould see it as that you are waiting and want it to be special! I would see you as rare and respect your choice. I too am a older virgin and I know its hard to find people who understand the struggles but its not a badge of shame but a badge of pride! You know what you want and you won't settle! Own that

[Asker]

would you mind giving me your opinion on some other things?
if not its okay! :)

[Mhmmmalreadykno]

Honestly, I wouldn't care if my boyfriend had limited dating experience. If he was a virgin and 30, I wouldn't mind because the guys I would perfer dating are virgins. So dont stress, some girls may be wanting virgins

[Asker]

awesome!! :) thank you!! :O
I've always been kind aworried about it

[Mhmmmalreadykno]

No worries :))

[fallen_wings]

Depends. If he has a reason to be a virgin (for example, because of his religion) I accept that. If he doesn't have a reason, I don't really care. It's fine

[Asker]

I've just always been super shy :O
and now.. I've got so many things going on that im not sure if id be able to date?

[sheikalana]

It could be for religious purposes. There's a bunch of people who are still a virgin in their 30s because they haven't found the right partner and are looking forward to do it with that one special person exclusively.

[Asker]

I am mainly just super shy

[sheikalana]

and that’s okay. that shouldn’t bother you and no one should judge your virginity that doesn’t make you a better or a worse person.

[Asker]

thank you :)

[Dazed0N0Confused]

I wouldn't care, I don't mind taking the reigns in bed and giving direction. I wouldn't think it odd, just needing a little nudge in a direction or two

[Asker]

Awesome! :) I've always been a bit worried about it

its largely cause I've always been a bit of a social misfit :P
im very shy... have a bit of social anxiety

[Dazed0N0Confused]

I'm a social misfit too, but thankfully I have a band of misfits to fall on. Don't worry too much about it, be yourself and do what feels natural.

[Asker]

Would you be comfortable answering some more questions?
and just giving me your advice/opinions

if not its okay! :)

[Dazed0N0Confused]

Sure, thing :)

[Asker]

Would you be comfortable messaging me?
I am only 1xper... so apparently i can't message first haha

[Dazed0N0Confused]

Done :)

[silvermoon84]

It’s really not as big a deal as you might think. Yeah it might be a dealbreaker for some women but not for others. Speaking for myself it wouldn’t be a deal breaker for me.

[Asker]

Ehh, I suppose im just a really awkward person at first
im very shy :(
and have a bit of social anxiety...

and i spent most of my life being unable to read women

[silvermoon84]

That’s understandable. Social anxiety can make dating tough on both genders. I have a good friend who suffers from it, but don’t give up hope. Finding love is hard even without it, but the right girl won’t care. As for not being able to read women, we can be complex so it’s not just you.

[Asker]

haha ya! :O
thanks!!
ill try my best

id ask more stuff
but i dont wanna bother you

[flamiE]

I wouldn’t have a problem with it. I would think they’re either shy or focusing on themselves. Either way that’s cool with me.

[Asker]

awesome! :)
I've alwys been a bit worried about it

[flamiE]

Well you shouldn’t. It actually shows you’re a good guy if anything. The only thing I can think as of why someone wouldn’t be perfectly fine with it is cause men normally want to explore. I mean I’ve seen it plenty of times but that doesn’t mean all men are like that of course. Not my personal view just giving you a different perspective.

[Asker]

For me its largely been out of fear :P

[flamiE]

I’m sure you’ll be just fine 😊 good luck on finding your special one

[Asker]

thanks!!