Is it game over for single women at 30+ (and single mums)? Should they give up on men and so kill themself? Guys, would you date women in their 30s+?

Question

I know i sound like a femcel but i have read the posts of many guys on gag/youtube and most of them want young women without kids. It just scares me since i am afraid of being alone and i rather would kill myself than being alone. So i am afraid of being 30+. I only have 9 years time.

Avicenna · Accepted Answer

First of all, don't take the opinions of a relatively small number of guys as some sort of gospel. It's certainly true that most men would prefer to date a childless woman in her 20s if they have the choice rather than a single mom who's older than that, but that doesn't mean women in their 30s and even some single moms don't have options- they do. But it is true that men don't want to have to deal with the drama surrounding other men's children and to come last.

It's ridiculous that a young woman your age is panicking like this. It does get harder to meet the right person as you get into your 30s because a lot of people have paired off by then and people in general get pickier or have kids, which is a dealbreaker for many prospective partner of these parents.

What that means for you is that it's best to meet your long-term partner while you're in your 20s- you'll have more options. However, you also need to choose wisely because you don't want to become a single mom in a few years. Think about what you want in a long-term partner and date only guys that fit that description and are ready to commit to the right person. Get an IUD or use birth control and insist that he wear condoms until you're both ready to try to get pregnant (something you should only do by mutual agreement in a secure relationship).

Also work on building your career.

NamerOfStars · Accepted Answer

Relax- it's nowhere near as bleak as you're making it out to be.

Now, this isn't how I like to like to think of it- I find it dehumanizing in the extreme- but picture the world of dating as a marketplace, where what you're buying is a romantic/sexual partner, and what you're buying with is yourself as a romantic/sexual partner. Certain things add value, and certain things subtract it. And these things differ between men and women. Women care more about a man's money than men care about a woman's, and men care about a woman's youth than women care about a man's.

Does that mean that being poor and old make you unsuitable? No- but it does make you less "valuable" in dating terms (I told you I don't like thinking of it this way; it just makes it easy to understand). It may require a slackening of your standards, but you'll probably be able to find someone. Having more perks and fewer detriments just gives you more choices.

silvermoon84 · Accepted Answer

30+ and (gasp) STILL SINGLE! I used to think that was so terrible when I was younger but it’s really not that bad, and yes there are men who will date us. As for the guys who won’t? Well, our age filters those guys out of the equation since they weren’t options anyway. You’ll be fine 😊

MzAsh · Accepted Answer

No way. Most guys really aren’t that picky. In fact, most guys take whatever they can get. As a woman, you’ll likely always have options.

OlderAndWiser · Answer

I dated single moms when I was younger and when I was older. Guy who refuse to date single moms are like guys who love big boobs: they run their mouths about it constantly. Guys who date single moms, like guys you prefer smaller boobs, don't broadcast the fact, but they exist in big numbers!

ohshee · Answer

When I was 15 and a half 16 I dated women in their forties and thirties for me it was a total turn-on now that I'm in my 40s I would date women in their thirties and in their twenties because it's a total turn on LOL it all depends on who you are what you like it's compatibility I honestly don't think you have anything to worry about I can read your words and their tell me you have a very beautiful heart and your beautiful person on the inside and that's what counts that's where true beauty is you just have to put yourself out there more chat with people get to know them I really honestly don't believe you have anything to worry about

FunkyMonkee · Answer

Yeah, young women without kids would be nice, partly because a lot of guys don't exactly want to become an instant daddy! But, a LOT of guys don't care! If you fall for a girl, hard enough, the other stuff doesn't matter! I'd love to have girl still in her baby-making years because I'd love to have kids and all the women my age have completely closed up the nursery and exchanged it for a playground!!

FoxnEagle · Answer

"afraid of being alone"
Do not expect a man to cure your loneliness. You still need other people, if you are feeling lonely now, fix that first.

"I only have 9 years time"
Plenty of time. Let me put it into perspective, once you hit 30, 9 years will have been nearly a third of your life.

Ninjazzed · Answer

What the fuck? Why would they kill themselves?

30 isn’t even old? It’s not even considered middle age? To be 22 years old, you sure don’t act like it.

We know our worth. We want someone to treat us right.. unfortunately there are really few of them.. we rather stay single than to waste time with someone with dangerous pride and little to no respect.

Crazybeeguy · Answer

That kind of stinks that you are stressing about your age and you have 9yrs left?
Look honestly you should worry about finding a guy who will be good to you that you are attracted to, not that you only have 9 good years left. Because you have more, the problem is there are plenty of guys that would be great husbands to you, but that's the thing there are also many that are just shit. Knowing the difference is the hardest part. Good luck!

ChrisMaster69 · Answer

Nothing wrong with women in their 30’s or even 40’s.

A guy that slags them off, will be a bit Hypocritical if he finds himself single at 35 - 45 and his options are women in their 30’s or 40’s.

Never be afraid of being alone, there is loads to do and fun to be had,

Caliguy88 · Answer

Shit. I’d say don’t even start dating till 30. I missed a lot of good times in my 20 dating the whole way through. Depends on where you are too. Big cities people get married way later than small town. I’d have probably been married by now if I didn’t focus on education and career for all my 20s as well.

Yanagi_Kaze · Answer

I date depending on couple of things:
Prettiness (Not necessary sexual appeal, but pretty)
Personality (Must be compatible to my personality)
Education/Intelligence.

These don't say anything about age.

Tstrbrainer · Answer

I don't think so. There are guys without such concepts.  Anyway, I'll date women of any age as long as they are adult.  But that doesn't really count as my interest is only sex, no relationship

zagor · Answer

If you don't change your mentality you will definitely be single at 30. But that isn't a bad thing. Learn to live for yourself.

Anonymous · Answer

I tried but they tell me I'm a kid. So that's it. I tried when I was 25, and also now that I'm 27 and soon 28. Yet when they know my age it's the same stormy they change how they treat me and they start telling me friend. So it's their loss.

bamesjond0069 · Answer

Im 34 and id date a woman in her 30s if she's hot but also only if it was casual. Id not be interested in marriage or having kids with her. You know from other posts i prefer much younger for serious relationships.

blank_expression · Answer

The 30yos with a kid that I have seen get someone, went for a lot older, and they had $$$.

Leavesbound · Answer

No of course not. It merely means there may be fewer choices but not that there are none.

exitseven · Answer

There are plenty of women over 30 that are great dating material. A lot of people concentrate on their careers and put off getting married for later.

Hispanic-Cool-Guy · Answer

Single moms definitely aren't for me. Women in their 30's are fine.

Guardian45 · Answer

If you think it's game over, then you need a mental health counselor. DON'T BELIEVE ANY FING IDIOT who tells you this, ESPECIALLY your family!

DarcRefractions · Answer

u can always date a beta dude that's like 2/3 of men

shiril · Answer

If dating is not going to end up necessarily in bed then it is to understand each other widening your horizons... Having one more friend... I think it is ok to date.

AmeerX · Answer

I actually love this girl who is going to be 30. I want to marry her and I don't want anyone getting interest in her

Anonymous · Answer

Yes you should (rolling eyes). Why do women feel this way? Society and other women do it? Make you feel "worthless".

DaveToo · Answer

At my age, it would be worse than robbing the cradle! My oldest daughter is 48, the youngest is 44.

egykimo · Answer

I'm 33 and never been in real relationship and it us ok gir me to date a single mom or a a girl in her 30s

Dchrls78104 · Answer

30+ year old woman, I would date; woman who has kids, I wouldn't date.

Jamie05rhs · Answer

I don't think you have anything to worry about. I'm sure you will find someone before then.

Shihab91 · Answer

If she is perfect to me, and she wants more kids with me... I think yes I would give it a try

TallAnon · Answer

Bit out of my age range, but around 28 that would be fine. Single mother though? No thanks.

Romeocuck · Answer

I would date even a single moms or even a pregnant woman...

COMMODOREII · Answer

I would date you. You seem cool. 😎

Joshua0213 · Answer

If she had a good personality yeah no problem

JesseJayNeak · Answer

Young man here. I wouldn't tbh.

Anonymous · Answer

What’s wrong with you?

Alexalex92 · Answer

Noooo not at all! 30+ is the best age ;)

SamFromFL · Answer

Kill them selves

Is it game over for single women at 30+ (and single mums)? Should they give up on men and so kill themself? Guys, would you date women in their 30s+?

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