When I am in a group setting playing a sport or hiking with random people, I tend to either smile at people I just meet, say hi to strangers, introduce myself, or strike up conversation with people I hardly know. I'm a very smiley person and also greet people from afar a lot. In a friend hangout, if there are cliques, I end up making my rounds and striking up conversation with everyone at one point. Mostly I just want people to feel welcomed. Fyi: I'm not touchy, I don't talk to straight men with me being the only girl in the group, and I don't flirt.
Men, is this a turn off?
I've hardly been outgoing for most of my life. This is something I just started to practice now in my twenties.
Guys, is it a turn off when a woman is "too friendly" to everyone?
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When I was 20s it was a big turn on for every guy I knew, if a woman was friendly and comfortable talking to men.
"being overly friendly" from the POV of a guy looking for serious would be her actively flirting. That is sexual flirting with every dude or worse, getting touchy. Cause it indicates she's sleeping with every dude and guys looking for serious tend not to want to share or risk it on a woman who doesn't think "loyalty" is a thing. If he wanted that he could just get a hooker for way less hassle. Of course, the usual feminists would claim that what I'm saying is unfair because "men and women are the same". Just ignore that crowd if you want to be attractive to men in non-shallow ways.
It can be although it depends on the culture what too friendly means. I want to be seen and treated differently from other guys by a girlfriend / wife. If a girl is too friendly with everyone, when I'm with her it may not look like our relationship is special. I know it may come off a bit possessive but I'd appreciate if my girlfriend treated me in an extra friendly manner in public, compared to other guys /girls.
If in your culture PDA and flirting is common then being friendly is OK, coz that'd be a differentiating factor. In my culture being nice and friendly is a sign of interest from a girl. Coz usually women in my culture act very aloof and reserved with strangers, especially men.
I think it's actually an attractive quality. It shows a certain level of confidence and maturity. As long as you're not pushy or getting yourself into bad situations I think it's a good thing. Just don't let yourself be gullible. If a man or woman has a problem with their partner being this way it's because they are insecure. So if you love them just work on making them feel more secure in your relationship maybe even help them to start interacting with people more. Maybe even while you're interacting with others make a point to give your partner a quick wink or something to let them know they're special even while they're across the room. Just remember as long as you have never given them any reason to be jealous then it's their issue that they need to fix and being their partner you should try and help them but don't let them take away the good things in you
It can be if the woman treats him no different than them. I had this conversation with an ex where she told me she hated how I was nice to everyone because she didn't feel unique or special when I was nice to her. It's not so much an issue because you're nice, but rather I think you may relate to this next statement: you want to feel like you're special to that person or something about you/what you've done makes you stand out. Often times, treating everyone well makes it feel more like a standard and not the exception.
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Anonymous
(45 Plus)
1 y
Because guys KNOW that while you think "he's just being nice", THEY know he really wants to f*ck you. Guys KNOW that's most guys interpret ANY female attention as possible sexual interest. So when you talk to other guys its kind of humiliating for your guy. Think of how you will feel if he openly flirts with a girl in front of you. Jealous and humiliated. Now I'm not saying that this is reasonable-you are probably just making conversation-but you did ask why guys find it a turn off and that is why. Insecurity.
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Anonymous
(30-35)
1 y
Yes, like when you can tell she’s “putting on her nice face” for you, or other people… her voice suddenly jumps into the next frequency range, and there’s just that fakeness to it, like you know she doesn’t actually talk to people that way. You know what I mean?
Don’t do that lol. Be nice because you’re nice. Talk the way you talk. Don’t talk to people like they’re your puppy dog. It is definitely annoying. Maybe some people think it’s cute or something, but I see through it. Be yourself. Plain and simple. If you’re changing the way you talk around people, you’re doing it wrong. Talk the way you talk.
No it´s not. It can be an advantage because being helpful and friendly is something many lack nowadays. It can be "dangerous" though when it starts to seem you treat everybody equally meaning you treat your boyfriend just like some male colleagues from work because that could enhance jealousy and lead to fights and probably break up.
It's not - I have many friends like that and they all have stable and passionate relationships. More to it - if I see a friendly individual, be it a man or a woman, I'm immediately attracted to it. If it's a woman, it's certainly a trait I'd waste a moment or two to think about.
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Anonymous
(30-35)
1 y
Yes. I’d prefer girl be friendly with me and not others and I want that to be apparent. In my experience, I like expressions of niceness but I also become immediately aware that it doesn’t mean anything more. I want to feel that it’s for me and every time it’s not I get a bit mad.
Not at all. I have always had the best relationships with flirty females. I love to watch them being themselves. Guys usually get jealous of me because I'm the one the girl goes home with.
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