Why are men always asked to compromise their standards when dating?

[Coby7]

it seems like men are always told to lower their standards when it comes to dating but women are encouraged to have high standards. Why is that?

[DaveJord]

I think everyone eventually reaches and age where they have to take an honest look at themselves in a mirror and ask themselves what do they really need in life, instead of what they think they need in someone else.

I dated a few very attractive women when I was younger, like 8's to 10s on the physical attractiveness and sexy scale. Seriously I turned away some really hot ladies because I was so full of myself in thinking they were not hot enough for me. But honestly I probably set my standards too high for myself because none of it worked out.

After divorce at 45, I changed my approach... honestly because at 45 and after 20 years of marriage, I don 't think I had the same pull that I had at 25 when I was a lean, mean sex machine. But I do not think lowering my physical requirements was a compromise. Because I realized what I though was important was not as important as I thought. So instead of 8's and 10's I ended up with a solid 7 and she is the most attentive, compassionate, caring little sex machine I have ever known.

Sure she may not be a 10 or even a 7 to you, but she is to me. Because I learned from my mistakes and grew as a person and did that self evaluation and then started looking for the right person.

Did I compromise? Well maybe, but if I did then I did it for the right reasons in order to achieve the best result. Character and personality is way more important to a person who wants longevity.

And where does it say compromise is a bad thing?

[wtf636]

I think both sides do it. Both have unrealistic standards. Both are told by the other side they should be looking for different things.

Women want the bad guy that changes for them, they want a man that pays for everything, but still gives her the power when she wants it and takes it back when they don't. They want an emotionally available man, that still knows when to shove their face into the pillow and make love "like a real man". The man that all the women want, but he will never cheat on her, love her the most. And someone who makes enough money to brag to their friends about a bit and buy her nice things. They want all of this in one man, who will never ask for anything in return. This man is less than 1% of the population.

Men want the innocent bad girl. The classic "madonna whore" A woman that is kind, sweet, caring, nurturing, and feminine. But then they also want her to look, act, and fuck like a pornstar, without having slept with a ton of men to gather that experience. Then maintain that even if the man falls apart, or after kids. The woman he can show off to all his friends, that only has eyes for him. A lot also lack basic living skills and expect a woman to pick up after them, and cook for them, without complaining about anything. Again this woman is hard to find.

Social Media is the culprit.

[This_Is_My_Opinion8]

Give this man MHO. Like now!

[Juxtapose]

I just want a woman who doesn't make me want to swan dive off of a cliff.

[wtf636]

@Juxtapose stop chasing hot chicks. Find a nice girl that likes you and you find attractive.

[Juxtapose]

I do try!

[2Bunnies1Babe]

I guess it would depend on your standards. If you standards are purely physical, than lowering your standards is a mature and logical thing and would be encouraged, because physical beauty is a small aspect of a life-long relationship and doesn't last. If by "standards" you mean that you want everything: looks, success. intelligence, etc., I can't speak to that fully because I'm a female. As a female, I was pushed to find "the perfect" guy because my parents were incredibly insecure with their own relationship and projected those insecurities onto me. Because women can be impregnated, there's a huge pressure on us to find "the right guy" who will be a responsible father. Since men tend to look at physical beauty first, finding a perfect "10" woman who is all around perfect just isn't going to happen, and wiser, more mature men would advise to "lower your standards" to find an ideal partner, not a shallow barbie doll. Since women tend to not care as much about physical appearance, it's easier to find a "good guy" who isn't a ken doll and maintain their high standards, whereas a guy may be miserable if he has an unattractive wife and he can't get past that. Different standards may be what is causing the confusion for you.

[spuitkaas]

Actually I think many men should have higher standards. Especially when it comes to personality/emotional regulation etc in their partners.
I think men are looking at the wrong things, such as bed partners, if a girl has the same interests/hobbies/music taste or if the girl has a clothing style he likes etc. These things eventually really don't matter that much.
I notice all the time with guys I'm dating is that they will date anyone they can hold conversation with, is attractive and somewhat has the same interests, even though the convo is mostly me just talking and him listening, me having so many interests that I always have something in common and me or him being intellectually or emotionally on a completely different level. So then I reject them and they don't understand why, because they thought "we had no awkward silences so it should be good". Sir I could talk to a rock if I wanted and have no awkward silences. Y'all should have higher standards in that in my opinion.

[mark000h]

These are good points, men should have higher standards too, but men have different things they value in a woman. It doesn't make it wrong for men to value appearance or youth. We're just different.

[spuitkaas]

I don't think it is wrong to value appearance. I don't think I said that and I agree men are different, but I think the points I made are fundamental to have a successful relationship.

[spuitkaas]

I do think however, women should not be told not to value appearance either, because we often value appearance as well. I know it sucks to be rejected because of your height and other things you can't change, but we can't help it either. I'm just not attracted to men that are shorter than me.

[mark000h]

I agree. We all have likes and dislikes and they should be important. My point is that some women think that the things men value in a woman are shallow and are not as important. It's just different things because we are different. Men are more visual and also fertility and youth are more important because men can give sperm at any age but women only have a set period of time to reproduce, hence why a man values younger women.

[spuitkaas]

Personally as a medical biology student, I'm always very critical of the naturalistic fallacy. Also just because your biology says you should do something, doesn't mean you should.
Other than that, I think every person should be critical of their standards and think why you have them/where they come from and if they're something you can compromise on/are important. In my opinion, I think if a guy says "SHE MUST HAVE A BIG BUTT" you should think "is it because otherwise he's not attracted (which is valid by the way)" or because society says you should like big butts, because they're the beauty standard, but you actually don't think it's that important. Anyways, something to think about.

[Lionman95]

What things should guys look for if hobbies/the same interests/music tastes or style of clothing are wrong things?

[spuitkaas]

@Lionman95 it's not wrong persé, because having somewhat the same interests is definitely handy in a relationship, but having different interests is not a dealbreaker since you can learn from eachother.
I think the most important things are emotionally compatibility. How does she deal with situations that are difficult? Is she able to reflect on her actions and why she acts the way she does?
But also intellectual compatibility. Do you feel like she can get by with the things you say, or do you constantly have to explain everything? Are you intellectually stimulated by her?
Another thing are values. Do you think it's important to care for people and does she too? Is honesty or protecting someone's feelings more important?
I don't know this is also based on me and what I think, but think about it with yourself. What are things you can't live without if she doesn't have it or does have it.

[Lionman95]

@spuitkaas Thank you for the explanation. I agree with that.

[TruthBringer]

You're saying you're critidal about doing things that nature tells us to do, yet somehow there are stats and studies out there who clearly show that both men and women not only prefer but are more happy with the type of jobs that are more in tune with our nature. Hence why you see women doing more social jobs like working with kids in a daycare while men do more blue collar work or engineering. I also recall seeing a study that shows that more traditional relationships tend to bring more overall happiness compared to more 'modern' relatiosnhips.

Sure, just because nature tells us to do something, doesn't necessary mean we should, unless it is in our favor I can argue. For example, men are biologically engineered to spread their seed as much as they can, does that mean I should impregnate every woman I see, even despite being in a monogamous relationship already? No.

When it comes to standards, I agree. People should have high standards. But I can argue only on the CONDITION that they themselves live up to those standards. Imagine if I was a fat loser with no aspiration in life and I wouldn't date anyone who is fat either. That doesn't make sense, yet that's the reality we're living in. While being a very in-shape person myself soon about to go to the US to fly the F-35, I have the right to have a higher standard.

[Shiningtempest]

@spuitkaas On the contrary, dating a woman with the same interests/hobbies/music taste matter in the short run & long run.

[ChiTown33]

@spuitkaas I have no problem with your post so long as you admit you see your double standard. You speak very logically on how guys need to have higher standards and not focus so much on the physical. But then you fully admit you do that. The only difference being between the 2 genders is you can afford to take this attitude. Because at the end of the day men will line up to date you. While most guys have to put in work just to get a date.

[Uptowngirl88]

Right they don't have standards nor moral.

[Neosporin]

I don’t agree that men have higher standards.

[TruthBringer]

@ChiTown33 Very well said! Women are born with value, men have to build their own value. That is one major difference between the two genders

[Neosporin]

@TruthBringer everyone has to build their value women included. I don’t agree with what you said.

[ChiTown33]

@Neosporin we are talking in general. Any woman can get a date. Sorry to sound crass but all the need have is a vagina and SOME guy will want to date them. Guys don't have that advantage with women. You know that even if you won't admit that lol

[spuitkaas]

@TruthBringer I don't know if you can back up those claims, but thinking about how those studies would be done. Would they ask "are you happy?" and then see what job they do. This a heavily flawed method because of many confounding factors. Are they happier bc the job that fits their gender norm creates a less hostile environment? Etc. I could talk about this for hours why not every study, especially social studies, should be taken as a fact. Same thing with the relationships. You should ask yourself why that was their conclusion and if there are other factors. Just assigning it to biology is the naturalistic fallacy.
I agree with that condition. I think you should be realistic with what you have to offer and adapt your expectations.

[spuitkaas]

@TruthBringer also I don't agree with the born with value and build their value. That is based on nothing? It also promotes purity culture, which I don't agree with.

[spuitkaas]

@ChiTown33 I never said they should focus on physical appearance. Read my reply to the other guy.
I want to add a correction. Men line up to have sex with me, not for a long-term relationship persé. It's not as easy as you think.

[spuitkaas]

@Neosporin never said guys have higher standards and every person has value. One person is not more valuable than the other.

[Neosporin]

@spuitkaas I misread your first sentence as "I think men have higher standards". Sorry my mistake.

[Neosporin]

@ChiTown33 I think your point is exaggerated. Any man can get a date too as long as they're willing to accept desperate women. Just because there are some desperate men (or women) out there doesn't mean that you're fine enough as you are in the dating world. Hooking up with the desperate who will take anything should not be equivalent to success.

[TruthBringer]

@spuitkaas "By far the most female-dominated occupations are personal care workers, such as health care assistants and home-based personal workers. "
ilostat.ilo.org/.../
So that proves my point that women tend to work more in the social sector.

According to this study, having a more traditional relationship equals more frequent sex compared to modern relationships. Now the cause and effect to that we can simply guess and one which I have a strong feeling it has to do with being "equal" and stepping away from the more traditional gender role method.

"Throughout this article, we
assume that greater sexual frequency is generally a desired good: conflict may exist over
the timing and frequency of sex (Elliott and
Umberson 2008), but more frequent sex is
linked to higher sexual and marital satisfaction for both men and women."
www.asanet.org/.../Feb13ASRFeature.pdf

When it comes to gender role happinesss, read this article which directs you to the study above:
www.kstatecollegian.com/.../

[TruthBringer]

@spuitkaas Biology can be an explanation to why certain things are experienced. Biology may not be the only factor or the main cause (which I actually tend to believe it is), but calling out that as a logical fallacy just for the sake of you disagreeing, without actually debunking the theory, is what we call a fallacy fallacy.

So before you start using the fallacy fallacy, try to bring some evidence yourself to why biology isn't an important factor within the arguments we give.

When it comes to women being born with value compared to men. We are talking about the SEXUAL MARKET here, not human value. Time has shown that average women can get partners much easier than average men. Especially when it comes to online dating. So even if women have to live up to certain beauty standards, it is definitely not on the same level of intensity as men. Afterall, men are supposed to do the pursuing whille women have to be pursued. Try online dating. You'll get a ton of matches compared to your average Joe. While the guys who catch your eyes definitely have somethign going on for themsevles (tall, good looking, most likely ambitious, have achieved certain milestones etc.). And this is speaking in general terms. So with tha tbeing said, it's like what @ChiTown33 said, just having a vagina already puts you ahead of the game in terms of dating. There are many social experiments just on youtube about this topic that you can see for yourself.

[TruthBringer]

@Neosporin At first you say that you disagree with our statement, then you actually start to contradict yourself by pointing out desperation out there. It's exactly this why average or even below-average women tend to have guys lining up to date or have sex with them. Because they are desperate. And from my experience, there are a lot less desperate women trying to get with an average to below-average guy comapred to the complete opposite.

When we say that women are brn with value and men are not, we are talking about the sexual market. Men have to make something out of themselves in order to attract the opposite gender. While women (generally speaking) have to keep themselves available, young and pretty and they'll have plenty of suitors. If you're not aware of this dynamic, then frankly, you're living under a rock and have some catching up to do.

Yes, EVERYONE has to build their value. This is a philosophy of life. We all have to make and find our way in this world. Just being stagnant won't get us anymore. The point here is, that even a stagnant woman can get herself a partner far more likely than a stagnant man. Why? Because what men and women seek in a partner are vastly different. Men want young & fertile women whom they can make the mother of their children. Women want to have a man on a higher level they can look up to. Hence why this whole "outrage" about women needing to "date down" because they are becoming higher educated than men. So much that it made national TV.

[Neosporin]

@TruthBringer you say that I contradict myself but here you are saying both that women are born with value and that everyone has to build themselves? Which one is it? That women don’t have to do anything or that everyone should make some kind of effort regardless of how they’re born. It seems to me the confused one is you.

[TruthBringer]

@Neosporin Did you not read what I said? I clearly distinguished living life itself from the sexual market. We all have to build ourselves when it comes to living life. When it comes to the sexual market, women have the upperhand... well that is until their 30s and 40s depending on how well she has taken care of her health. The only one who seems confused is yourself since you clearly didn't read what I said properly.

[ChiTown33]

@spuitkaas re-read my initial post you misread it. I never said you said you said they should focus on physical appearance. You said the opposite! You said women shouldn't do that but then admitted that even you're guilty of that. I was commending you for your honesty but saying you can't hold men to a standard you won't keep yourself. Then I said the only thing is you don't understand fully I think that women can have the luxury of being picky while guys can't you can decide "well he's just too short I'm not interested". Guys can't! I mean a guy can say "well she's just a little too girthful for me". But that might be his only option. That girthful lady might be the only woman will give him a shot.
And I do realize when I say "date you" that I'm including the guys who ONLY want to sleep with you. But how many guys do you think look at you when they first meet you and think to themselves "hey I'd like to sleep with her"? Most? Almost all of them. Point of what I'm saying is most guys are driven by that urge. It doesn't make them bad people and most of them actually form a relationship with the woman in question. If she's interested. So you see you can't just dismiss guys who want to sleep with her. Because most aren't in it JUST to sleep with her.

[ChiTown33]

@Neosporin you can think anything you like it doesn't change reality.

[Neosporin]

@ChiTown33 reality is not melodramatic exaggeration buddy.

[Neosporin]

@TruthBringer I would say you are the confused one since you think there is some kind of clear distinction between sexual success and success in life in general. If one requires work then so does the other. Trying to make all the special exceptions so that it seems like women have this magical pedestal when in reality they’re just as flawed any human being. A two hundred pound walrus will not have success with guys just because it’s a female. And if two weirdo males decide to f- that thing is that still considered success? Hardly.

All in all my main point here is that I don’t think women are born with value and then men have to work for their value. Either we both have to work or we’re both born with it the sexes are equal.

[ChiTown33]

@Neosporin neither is your OPINION

[TruthBringer]

@Neosporin The irony of calling someone confused and then proceed to use strawman arguments in a desperate attempt to debunk anything the other person said. It's obvious that you're resorting to not only logical fallacies but plausible deniability. I guess that cognitive dissonance is something you have to sort out for yourself.

The fact you also think that men and women are equal goes to show you need to get out of that cave and enter the real world. But whatever helps you sleep at night ;)

[Kiran_Yagami]

Because we live in a pussified society where women are viewed as "the prize". In reality, women are not the prize. Women have not been the prize since our population was stable enough to survive an entire generation of women refusing to have children.

When women are viewed as the prize, a man is considered lucky to have any woman at all. However, a man's ability to live a happy and fulfilling life without women is vastly underestimated. Given the current dating climate, sex is relatively easy to come by even for a man and he doesn't even have to offer anything in return most of the time. With the right attitude and resources, you can bang broads by the truckload without ever having to get to know them, so living a life of sexual abundance while simultaneously avoiding relationships like the plague is far easier than visa versa. If men treated women like the abundant resource they actually are, they wouldn't compromise their standards when dating. But most men are stupid. I'm OK with that, though. It just leaves more for the rest of us.

[silvermoon84]

I can only speak for myself, but I encourage both women AND men to have high standards and never settle for less. Women get told to lower their standards when they’re single past 30. I believe a woman’s expectations should be lowered, but standards? No, as long as said standards are pertaining to a man’s personality, values and moral character and not idiotic things like his hair color or favorite sports team. As for women who tell men to lower their expectations, these are bitter angry women who are just mad they can’t get a man to look at them. A woman who is secure about herself and not bitter isn’t phased by the men who don’t want her because she knows those men aren’t options for her anyway. She just wishes them well and goes about her business.

[bgreek]

Women need to"Grow Up"with their expectations
-No One is perfect
-Money isn't all important
-Communication is important
-Trust
-Respect
-Sense Of Humor
-Morals/Values
These are very simple expectations

The difference between men/women dating
Women like the pump and dump
And be used for sex
Women can learn from men

Men will date any woman. And give them a chance
If it doesn't work out men move on
Until they find the right woman
Women need to stop listening to society
And decide what they want in a man
Society rules don't pay my bills, or anyone

[AncientWisdom]

It’s because we live in a society that is biased in favor of females. It’s a hard truth but in western society men are considered disposable. Females have value at birth. Men have to earn their value. I’m not saying it’s right but it’s true. I am seeing a conversation arising , and that is promising. Good men and women are waking up to this fact , and starting a conversation. The best thing a young man can do right now is work on himself and his success , and stay away from marriage. There’s always a willing hookup these days and that will work until you become a high value man then you can pick what you want because you’ll have options.

[MCheetah]

The women who say this are hypocrites and worth ignoring. Nothing more than that.

In my opinion, everyone should have realistic standards. Meaning, don't ask for anything you yourself can't produce the equivalent of (with maybe one or two exceptions). If you're a 2 out of 10, don't expect to get a 10.

That's why I, as an overweight guy, want thick women and wouldn't ask for some size 2 model or something. It's hypocritical to expect others to be something you yourself can't live up to. Like I said, one or two exceptions are okay though. I like big boobs in a girl, and men usually don't have boobs. I also like a girl to dress feminine and girly, but as a male, you'll always see me dressed like a man and not wearing pink or a pair of Crocs or some crap.

[Diodoro]

It's more sneaky than that

On the list of standards girls have for their dream guy they tac on these without mentioning them
- and wants exactly what I want
- and wants me exclusively

So it's not that they're asking you to compromise. They're just looking for a guy that is looking for a girl like her, wants all of the same things she wants, as well as fits all the other standards she says outloud.

Problem is if a girl thinks about guys wanting what they want and guys who want them they realize how much more rare and potentially impossible that is to find for guys that have the other things on their list

[Effably]

No one really asks that. I can see where you're coming from though as for an average person if a guy and a girl want roughly equal amounts of dates that is how it would work out.

She as a girl who typically enjoy more ease in dating would end up more selective. If you have 20 people to choose from it only makes sense you pick the ones you like most. Wouldn't we do that too?
And he by contrast who likely has two people or so to choose from would often try to see if there is chemistry even with people he might not normally be into.

It does sort of match reality in the online dating world. It is worth noting though that this power-imbalance goes away when you stop being girl1 and guy14 and become people with names and personality.
So well. I see your point. You're not all wrong. That mindset while sort of true will do you no favours.

[YollyM]

It's not just men we all have to compromise our standards sometimes.

Men sometimes just have standards that are above their caliber when it comes to looks, income & lifestyle so when women that meet their standards reject them they feel like they have to settle for less (compromise), when in reality they are just biting what they can chew.

High value women are typically attracted to men who are gentlemen; independent & wise.
In essence men usually have high standards for their ideal woman but often don't match the standards of their ideal woman.

[ElvenMr]

Let's just say a lot of women don't have what men want, and a lot of men don't have what women want.

Everyone means different things when they talk about their standards. Some people have super shallow standards, that doesn't go beyond looks, or money. The other qualities of a person doesn't even seem to matter to them, until they get hurt by them eventually.

Also i find it funny how "high value women" is generally usually just used for women who are good looking, maybe went to college, but that's it.. Meanwhile for a men to be called high value he needs to tick all kinds of boxes, basically just be perfect in every aspect lol.
So like.. high value men/women, okay but in what way are they high value?

There are always exceptions, but there is a reason men complain more about women's unrealisticly high standards, then there are women... Like as you can see.. it's not even called high standards anymore, which would be still too much, that's why it's called "high" no? Because it's asking too much.
Standards are just that, standards which a person wants to have in their partner, within reason.

[JC1981]

When women are told to up their standards, she generally has low self esteem and dates guys that treat her badly. When men are told to lower their standards, generally have unrealistic standards in wanting a supermodel for a girlfriend and want a unicorn woman.

[globetrotter22]

I don’t know if men are being “asked” to comprise although feminists are never satisfied and they do demand more and more in general.

Anyway women are more confident that they can “date up” compared to men. This is very obvious when they waste so much time fantasizing about landing a celebrity male. They generally have higher standards for men then they have for themselves.

However I’ve seen women throw all caution to the wind if a guy knows how to push their buttons. Sociopaths and/or assholes are good at this.

Its rare for a decent man to be able to date up. However I have seen a few exceptions. The guy was usually lucky enough to be in the right place at the right time. He also was extremely fortunate to be in the right state of mind. That is absolutely critical. Establishing a good first impression on a girl makes or breaks the relationship. The guy also knows how to push and pull at the right moments.

[Anonymous]

We can be told to lower our standards all we want. The good thing is we don't have to. Control the thirst and be patient. It takes time to find a girl worth your time but they do exist. If she's money focused (not the same as career focused), ditch her. If she's expecting you to pay 100%, ditch her. If she doesn't want to compromise, ditch her. See how she treats others. Study her situation with friends, family, and colleagues. If she can't get along with them, ditch her. If she has a standard on height, body, etc. Make sure she fits your standards. If she can't, ditch her she's a hypocrite. If she wants a bread winning man as part of some tradition and she's not in the kitchen fixing you 3 square meals, popping you 3+ kids, has a body count of 0 before you, ditch her, she's a hypocrite.

[Subarugirl]

Men should have realistic standards, people want a partner who has their shit together. If you don't then you aren't going to be attractive as a partner.

[Subarugirl]

Lol who on earth disagreed with this? No one wants to date someone who is a mess,...

[Tstrbrainer]

Doesn't it apply to women too?

[Subarugirl]

@Tstrbrainer obviously

[TruthBringer]

We all should have high standards GIVEN that we live up to those standards ourselves. You can't expect yourself to be entitled to requirements you set up for someone else if you yourself don't mean it.

As for your question itself: Welcome to the world of double standards feminism has brought.

[TruthBringer]

To the woman who said "Because women are seen as easy when they do that."

- Women are already easy because they themselves choose that lifestyle, regardless of their standards. So on one hand you have women who are very promiscuous while wanting (or even demanding) a traditional family man. That's not how it works.

[Anonymous]

Men are constantly telling us that looks, youth, and fertility is the most important thing to them and you wonder why we question their standards? How many men are actually getting the exact type of women they want? Almost none. What does that tell you?

[cookiecrusher]

How is your 6, figure, feet, pack, inches husband doing by the way?

Joking aside, men are pretty reasonable for just wanting a basic feminine woman, with not much extra.

[Guffrus]

That is not what you were told.

[Uptowngirl88]

Because a lot of times you men aren't attractive, don't have a career, don't have any money, don't have a car, don't have a house yet have the audacity to approach women. Stop approaching women if you don't have shit. Lower your standards to where you are.

[Uptowngirl88]

Oh yeah and don't have an education yet have the audacity to approach us like stop it

[Wester1967]

Because simps are so desperate for the vag, they will give up everything. All their money and time, standards, human dignity for some nasty old used up vag that looks like a dang subway sandwich.. When they could just be smart and go out and pay a prostitute $100 and be done with it.

[CallmeTheKnight]

In general, that's untrue. If a man is told to compromise his standards, then he's clearly in the wrong environment and also should stop entertaining insecure people. If he doesn't want certain types of women, then he's not gonna look their way.
As far as the women who are told to raise their standards, look at her environment and who encourages that

[Anonymous]

Literally everyone is asked to compromise their standards when dating. What's up with the gender wars all over the internet lately? It's so ridiculous. Chances are anything you think is exlusive to men, women think is exclusive to women. We're all human we say and do dumb shit to eachother regardless of gender lol.

[jerdanro]

Definitely.

[dragoblack]

We live in a society where everything is sexualized & idealized, that tends to affect our choices to become unrealistic. But in dating society, men are dime a dozen. Men blow up womens social messages all the time, especially on dating sites. So they have plenty of options to weed through, so they have a right to have higher standards... especially with how many insecure assholes are out there that take it out on other people.

[slatyb]

It’s the same for both. Have you been complaining about your inability to find a partner while only being willing to date the most beautiful women?

[Lionman95]

I don´t know. I have been and experienced so many things but I´ve never heard that guys should lower their standards all together. I think it rather refers to physical expectations guys might have of women.