I need advice people, im so confused in the signs?

[Newchick86]

So I have talking to a guy for over 8mths online and we finally meet 2 weeks ago for the first time. It was amazing and the connection was there straight away. He took me to his band rehearsal to meet his brother and mates. Which they said he has never brought anyone to rehearsals.
Once i left we kept talking on the phone and texting. He did say to me though he isn't ready for a relationship. But he appreciates me and I'm a good friend. I know he is going through a lot with family loss and his ex not letting him see his kids.
But he did say to me, he has never felt more comfortable with anyone like this before. And that no one has ever done what I have done for him. I'm just confused if im wasting my time. Because he keeps himself busy with work and band practice, to lock out the hurt and pain. Help because I'm so confused 😕

[WhatTheHeckkkk]

There’s not much advice to give you because he made it very clear that he is interested in you and very comfortable with you, but he simply does not want a relationship right now because of his current situations.


You two are very close friends it seems, and he is content with how it is right now. It seems as though when everything gets settled, he will be more open to a relationship. He’s very clear with his how he feels towards you, and it isn’t misleading or sending different signals.


It’s up to you to decide if you want to wait or not. It’s been 8 months of talking, so I guess you seem very committed to him, and he seems committed to you as well. Just try and talk to him more about it, see how he feels.

[Flower_Power]

Just be kind! You said their is some family loss in his life? That's hard to get through, and you being there for him is awesome and what he needs. It makes sense that he isn't ready for a relationship right now based on what he's going through, but in the future that may change. He will notice who has been kind to him all this time. He will notice who has shown him empathy. I feel like you still have a shot with this guy if you are patient. That being said, don't put all your eggs in one basket. Try to casually talk to other people just to keep options open. There is never a guarantee in the dating world.

[CallmeTheKnight]

What's there to figure out? The guy has some weight on his plate and appreciates you. If you were never clear on whether the both of you are friends or not, now is the time to let him know. To me, if he's got that much going on, it may not work after all, but it's fine to let him know what you were seeking.

If I'm talking to someone for so long and they had the nerve to say we're friends, I'll let them know that we're not and I'll take my leave If I'm seeking a relationship.

[In_Trance]

To be talking to anyone that long and all of a sudden he says he's not ready for a relationship means he's not interested in you. He may have felt the same way you do but clearly now he doesn't. I suggest you move on

[PrettyPriya]

I’m not sure what you are confused about. Sounds like you are aware that he needs some time to sort out the family issues and issues with his ex.

My best advice would just to tell him you are there for support when he needs it. Then, do exactly that. Be supportive where he needs it.

Just give the necessary time to grieve for his loss.

[Guslove]

Stay in touch with him but let him get in touch with you see if he is still interested. Let him decide what your future is don’t chase him