Why does everyone act like after 30, your dating life is over?

[Anonymous]

do y'all know how many young people prefer older, y'all will do just fine

i prefer older

i don't

[Pinay_ako]

I don’t think dating for people over 30 is over. Sometimes, it’s just the beginning. Some people are just late bloomers. I don’t know who or why put a deadline on love life. Don’t ever settle for less just because people think there’s nothing or nobody out there for you.

[Guy13]

Especially if you are a man. My 50-60 year old Business Mentors get more young girls’ numbers than I do. It is quite clear to me that the older guy is the higher his perceived Value.

[Pinay_ako]

@Guy13 hmmm that depends on what he has to offer - money, great sex, power or he’s just incredibly hot!

[OpenClose]

@Guy13 You've got a point. My parents divorced around the same time my last girlfriend and I split up. He dated 5 women and remarried since then. She's about 10 years or so younger than him.

[Guy__]

Dating people over a decade older is pretty much settling for less.
Because they are more valued for having money and shit, but if a younger person has it all, the young ones will always be hotter.

[shaysh87]

Dating is best in 20s because this is the age where everyone is single, nobody has baggage, this is also the most social time of your life so you get to meet so many new singles.

When most people hit 30, the dating pool has shrunk because this is the time where people pair off. It will only shrink more by the time you hit 35. This is also the age where you start losing your friends because a lot of them have husbands or wives. By the time you hit 40, it will shrink even more. 90% of the people around you would be either married, engaged or have kids.

People in their 30s also tend to be more reclusive , much less social compared to when they were in their 20s. So their likelihood of finding someone also shrinks due to this.

[Jamie05rhs]

💯 #Facts

[Blueeyes81]

Truth

[Anonymous]

for guys i dont think it does. Guys if anything stay in their prime longer, And some girls think they get better with age


for girls i think they start to pannic, Because their clock is ticking

once a girl passes her early to mid 30s. Thats close to her expired date, For having kids, And most guys want kids



guys still peak, Into their 40s. Looks health. And being firtle,

we have a 30 year window. 20-50 years old

girls have maybe a 15 year window, half that, Until its expired goods


and thats the truth

[shaysh87]

A mans prime is definitely not 40s. A mans prime is late 20s to early 30s. By the time most guys hit 40 , they look like shit. Sperm quality declines as you enter your 40s. Its time to stop dreaming

[Opinion Owner]

@shaysh87 Yea but girls like older guys, and if you take care of your self. You still. Look good,

I know guys in their 40s. That look great for their age, And they have money. Too.

And I know guys in their 20s that look terrible

So its all a toss up.

Guys shelf life. Is usually longer, You see guys in their 30s-40s. dating late 20s. Women

You rarely see it the other way around

Its an evolutionary instinct, to go for younger women, And women to be attracted to older more dominant/ powerful men,

It goes back to how we are wired as humans for 1000s of years

[shaysh87]

I honestly don’t know of many guys in their 40s dating women in their 20s. Take a look at marriage statistics , vast majority of young women in their 20s aren’t marrying them in their 40s. It’s common for a woman in her 20s to date a man in his 30s.

I’m 26, and I can tell you that most men hit the wall by 35. Vast majority of them officially look like shit by the time they hit 40

[shaysh87]

I'm honestly so sick of old farts on here claiming that young women want old men. No, we don't want old men. We like "older men" by 5-10 years older, not an old fat uncle or a grandpa. Quit posting pictures of 20 yr old women dating 40 yr old men, like its your fantasy obsession or something. I'm 26, not interested in some old man with wrinkles, hair loss, weight gain, white hairs, muscle loss, saggy balls, erectile dysfunction, dick not working sometimes. Never am I gonna ever find that shit attractive. I like tall, dark and handsome muscular young guys , in shape, strong and fast with a full head of hair and no wrinkles.

There is an evolutionary reason why vast majority of young women tend to date young men. Young men have better quality sperm which means healthier offspring and better survival of children. Young men are stronger and faster And defend her and her offspring better. Never ever is a old man who is weak slow suffering from muscle loss, knee doesn’t really work, dick not working sometimes ever attractive. We, as humans, are evolutionarily designed to find youth attractive.

I don’t care about how you like to believe in lies that you make feel better. Men hit the wall too and get ready to face the reality that you won’t always be attracting pretty young hot girls in their 20s

[shaysh87]

It’s uncommon to see someone in their 40s to be dating someone in her 20s. The only reason why you say it’s “common” is because you can’t bear the reality that you will hit the wall eventually. By the time you hit 40, you’re already on a serious decline. You will be competing with 30 yr old men who look way better than you, Stronger , faster, better working dicks, financially stable enough to start a family, young enough that a woman in her 20s can relate to him, we aren’t looking for daddies or uncles. We are looking for someone with a similar maturity level that we can relate with.

Why would I go for a 40 yr old when I can get a 33 yr old easily?

[JamesDiaz11]

Probably because 99% of the time women over 30 are significantly less attractive than younger ones, and they're all available so who would pick the older ones? Top that off with the baggage they carry from being leftovers (both men and women). Failed relationships, kids, and a tiredness towards life is something most 30+yo have if they're still on the dating market.
So, you have less time, less energy, and are less attractive to the opposite sex- this is why people believe their dating life is over.

[shaysh87]

Reality is your looks will also go downhill as you get older. You won't be able to attract the pretty young ladies you once did by the time you hit 40.

[JamesDiaz11]

@shaysh87 Really? Tell that to every successful guy in their 40's and 50's who has a steady supply of those pretty young ladies...

[shaysh87]

@JamesDiaz11

Just think about what If he lost his money, would she still be with him? I think not

Don’t confuse a prostitute with a girlfriend. They aren’t the same.

And no, it’s not common for a 40-50 yr old to be dating

[JamesDiaz11]

@shaysh87 All of the men of means/ power/ influence in their 40's and 50's (unless they're married) are dating women in their 20's.
Also, I find it insulting to women to correlate preference for a man who can support them, and provide a good life, with prostitution- this is SURVIVAL, not pure opportunism.
What do you think a girlfriend is/ does? I'll read to see if you're single or not.

[shaysh87]

@JamesDiaz11

Sweetie, once you stop paying her, she won't be there anymore.

do you really want to a wife who wouldn't stay with you once your money runs out?

According to marriage statistics, vast majority of young women are marrying men around their own age. I can show you the data.

[shaysh87]

@JamesDiaz11

I'm 26. I would very much rather marry a man who I am in love with and I am attracted to and want to have sex with. Rather than some rich ugly old dude who I don't want to have sex with, just because I want a few extra bucks in my wallet. I have my own money, I don't need to marry for money.

But honestly speaking , I have never seen it being common for a man in his 40s dating a woman in her 20s. Its rather uncommon. And when it does happen, its typically a sugar daddy relationship.

[JamesDiaz11]

@shaysh87 How does that challenge my statement: That the upper 1% of successful men are dating younger women? Tell me a stat that say the upper 1% of men (if not already married) are dating older women. I'll wait.

[JamesDiaz11]

@shaysh87 You talk about it as an either-or thing. Either date a guy you're interested in, or a guy with money. It's not, and while a majority of people do date people relatively close in age to them, but clearly you've never been around well-off crowds, because I can tell you (across the country, and especially in other countries) they date much younger women- who are incredibly happy to have a husband just as devoted, but where they can go to Yoga at 9am, while you're out making powerpoints for the boss...

[shaysh87]

The average age difference (for a heterosexual couple) is 2.3 years, with the man older than the woman. In 64 percent of heterosexual couples, the man is older. In 23 percent, the woman is older, and in the remaining 13 percent, the partners are less than 12 months apart in age.

fivethirtyeight.com/.../

Vast majority of countries in the world shows average age gap is less than 10 years apart.

www.pewresearch.org/.../

[shaysh87]

Listen sweetie,

if women don't like your personality when you make 60k a year, they still won't like your personality once you make 200k a year. The only difference is you will be able to get a woman when you're rich but she will just date you until your money runs out.

I , myself, am worth 6 figures. I would never ever advertise myself as a walking dollar sign just to find a date. Because I do not want to be with dating someone that would leave me once I lose my wealth.

Only people with shitty personalities and bad values would go for those types of relationships. there's wayy more to love than just money and sex. I want to be with someone who loves me for who I am.

[shaysh87]

I live in new york city, one of the most expensive cities in the world. Over here, rich men tend to marry rich women. Most tend to be married prior to 43.

The rich old guys who only go for significantly younger women 15-30 years younger tend to be playboys who aren't looking for marriage. For the few that are looking for marriage, they are usually looking for a trophy wife.

What usually happens is that he will work a lot, not have much time, date her, use her for sex and never end up marrying her. After a couple of years, he will just trade her for another hotter younger woman. He is usually the one who breaks up with her, she never officially breaks up with him.
These relationships are rarely ever made out of true love. Once his wealth runs out, she always leaves. And once her looks run out, he either dumps or starts cheating.

[shaysh87]

I'd very much rather marry a man who will love me and stay with me regardless if I am broke or rich, wrinkly or young. I dont envy those types of relationships.

And the folks who are obsessed with these types of relationships are not decent quality people with the proper values.

[JamesDiaz11]

@shaysh87 Not reading all that- if it takes you that much space to write a response chances are your argument isn't that good.

[shaysh87]

@JamesDiaz11

Maybe its cuz you're just hurt by the fact that vast majority of girls in their 20s aren't dating guys in their 40s.

Im 26 and i can say vast majority of us will pick a 30 yr old over a 40 yr old

[JamesDiaz11]

@shaysh87 Why am I personally hurt by it? Find me a single successful man who isn't dating a much younger woman? Open challenge.
Again, your small brain can't seem to get that successful men are 1% of the population; of course most women won't have access to them, and their relationships will be the minority overall, but my claim was merely that SUCCESSFUL MEN (albeit rarer) WILL DATE YOUNGER WOMEN, and there's no shortage of women who would date them.

[shaysh87]

@JamesDiaz11

It seems like you're really obsessed over dating the youngest women. Literally thats probably the 10th time you've repeated it. Thats why I'd say you're butt hurt. Plenty of old guys on here get really offended when I tell them that I'm not attracted to them.

Plus, 1% of men is an extremely tiny percent. what happens to the rest of the 99% of all men? I don't think its something actually worth obsessing over.

[OlderAndWiser]

My dating life after age 30 was much more active than it was before age 30. And much more satisfying.

[Apope16]

I just turned 35. When i hit that number 2 weeks ago... my dating life changed immediately. For women its even worse.

[Child_Of_Dust]

For woman, they have until approximately 34 before the chances of having children is greatly diminished. I think this also tells a timeframe of youth. After 30 people have their day jobs to work, own property maybe, and other responsibilities are heightened. I think the dating scene somewhat changes. It is less about having fun but about finding an actual partner for the purpose of a family. Also, after 30 you feel pressured to hurry up and choose. In your twenties you can kinda taking your time.

[VanillaSalt]

Life’s cruel isn’t it. Sure men get better as they age but their ability to be fathers also disappears lol.

[Child_Of_Dust]

@VanillaSalt Why would their ability to father disappear with age?

[VanillaSalt]

Well men also have a more difficult time as they age. Their options become more limited if they wanna have kids they have to find the younger women. And the longer men live the more disillusioned they become about women meaning they want less to do with them. Or I should say the less their willing to risk and smarter they are trying to avoid that risk.

[Child_Of_Dust]

@VanillaSalt I can see that. I suppose every person is different, but I can definitely see how people can fit into those categories.

[VanillaSalt]

Bigger point is… women get to enjoy not being alone longer while men have to struggle alone until their accepted and a woman sees fit to give them their own family.

[Child_Of_Dust]

@VanillaSalt I don't think one could really compare hardship between genders because it is so complicated with so many layers. Woman over 34 could be considered infertile, in which men who want familied won't want them. I think the bond is different between a married couple without kids vs a married couple with kids because the dependency level is different. Woman have to be choosy with who to raise a family with, but they better get married before 34 otherwise they sorta hit a wall. Mature men who have their act together come in short supply. It kinda takes a guy until they are 28 before they finally have themselves and a career sorted out. Women also have to deal with so many layers of portrayals as well. Example, in some cultures women are equivalent to owning sheep. Some cultures women don't have a say, not allowed to drive, can't even goto the hospital without a man's permission. So many cultures would rather abort a female to have a male son instead. Women have to tolerate always being objectified. Women have to protect themselves from predators. Their are risks to getting pregnant. Risks having a husband leave after already having kids. In many cultures women have to dress modest, not go out at night, etc or they will get kidnapped and murdered. Being a good husband isn't a simple duty that 'any' guy can do. You have to be capable of multiple roles to make sure the wife feels secure, loved, protected, able to raise kids, be supported, etc.

[VanillaSalt]

My whole comment was removed so fuck this shit.

[Child_Of_Dust]

@VanillaSalt Does girlsaskguys sensor?

[Slartybartfast]

My uncle is one year older than me... My grandfather was 67 when he was born.

[VanillaSalt]

Yes. But not generally.

[Child_Of_Dust]

@VanillaSalt Well I'm interested to read what your comment was. I think being bitter at gender difference is the answer, because biologically if it is how people are, it is there for a reason. It is more practical to accept and game-up! lol!!!

[DermalPunch]

My healthiest preganancy and best labour was at 35 .

[VanillaSalt]

Why is it when you mention “ the wall” women wanna point out that one or two people they know that had kids outside the ideal timeframe? Congrats on your achievement. It don’t change anything. Yes it’s possible to have kids after 35. Nobody said you couldn’t. Yes it’s possible for them to be healthy. But the ODDS of a successful and healthy pregnancy after 35 go down significantly! Real men are realists and play the odds. That’s supported by men in dating right now.

[DermalPunch]

@VanillaSalt pk. Sure. I know so many women with perfectly fine babies well into their 40s that it seems like a lot of fear mongering to me but hey.

[VanillaSalt]

Did they tell you how many times they had to try? How hard it was? How broken they were at the miscarriage? How many doctors visits and planning the perfect time of the month and making sure to set aside time to have sex at that time to guarantee pregnancy? I’m sure they went into intimate detail with all their struggles just for you to understand?

I’m looking at facts from millions of pregnancies and your looking at a few people that probably didn’t even share every fact with you. And even if your right public opinion says your wrong and who are people supposed to listen to, you or a study done over decades?

[VanillaSalt]

@child _of_dust summing up my bit earlier… let me start with this the grass is always greener on the other side. It’s normal to desire what’s hard to get and undervalue what comes easy. Women get tons of sex and attention easy and it’s not exactly what they want so they undervalue it but they struggle to get commitment so they desperately want it… Men who never get touched or told well done desire intimacy. Sex is the lowest and easiest for of them and they want it. Since commitment is their to give they don’t prioritize it like they should.

Men have to come to know and like you befor they commit. women file 80% of divorces so this supports that it’s women that can’t commit. So speaking of bond it seems women are more willing to break that bond then men.

And women SHOULD be choosy but if women WERE choosy we wouldn’t have the rate of single parents, such a serious abortion problem, and so many fosters…

Mature PEOPLE are in short supply. Women are forced to mature faster or they can’t get a marriage but men don’t have to so their slower. And a HUGE portion of women think they can be like men and start in their 30s or never and still be good wives.

Let’s not bring culture into this. In some cultures women are property in some their free… ironically women SEEM to be happier with less freedom rather then more. People desire limitation and struggle. Even if they wanna succeed the joy of success is lessened when their success comes easy. Besides imagine how much less traffic there would be if women didn’t drive lmao!

Ah yes objectified. Basically your saying your valued for your beauty and what you have to give… women have intrinsic value in their beauty and ability to make babies… men have no value until they can show they have better society. I’m tired of the whole don’t objectify me spiel… don’t you know what Ide give to be looked at with even negative attention over ignored as I kill myself at work every day for a society that thinks I’m nothing but a wallet?

[DermalPunch]

@VanillaSalt only one had. They are women of faith and weren't broken. They just waited and tried again. I had a dew miscarriages and theybwere all during my prime years. Also, they went into great detail. I know women in their prime years who've had still births. My grandmother had miscarriages and still births all in her prime years. I understand their is empirical data and no one is disputing that having kids past even 30 isn't ideal.

My issue is that they present in a way that causes women undue worry who are having "geriatric" pregnancies. In my experience, I have seen manynwomen have children within their prime and after. My aunt had her one and inly. child at 43. He's grew to a strapping 6'6" and is sharply. intelligent and handsome. All I am saying is what I have seen and lived makes me take what they say about later stage pregnancies with a grain of salt.

[VanillaSalt]

@Child_Of_Dust and idc if you agree with my take because that’s a truth I live with every day.

Men are murdered at much higher rates then women by the way. So violence happens regardless your gender.

Again women don’t seem to care about the risks of pregnancy to remain celibate… as for having a husband leave… alimony… child support… let’s discuss that for a minute. Alimony for a woman who gave up a career for her family… it’s the least a man can do… but what about the woman that continued to work? She still gets alimony. And men sometimes get it but rarely because women don’t like broke men. Very few women accept a male homemaker.

As for dressing modestly… would you want you 13 yr old daughter going out topless? In a micro skirt? Would it be bad if my schlong was swinging around in from of her? How’s about tight baby’s where ya can see my bulge? You wanna explain the junk outline when a guy gets stiff at a cloud? Modesty is important for everyone. If you don’t respect yourself you won’t get respect period.

One last point the very last thing you said. You pick them. Women decide the lowest of men they accept. They swoon over these chads and ignore all the other guys. Ok so I know that datings not really like that. But women complain about how all men just wanna have sex and here I’m wondering where my turn is. This ain’t some pathetic plea consider this. I’m amazing. I’m not going into how cause every time I do it’s fuckin cringe lol but just take my word for it… I’m amazing. Y’all picking guys that pump and dump, that abuse, that cheat… and I’m standing here like… hum you prefer these idiots instead? Women are fucking stupid. You CHOOSE your failure. You make bad choices in men and then refuse to take responsibility for them. Ah men are trash… men are dogs… men are what you let them be…

I can’t blame women entirely as there’s some sneaky fucking men out there but you ain’t gotta make it so fucking easy for them…

[VanillaSalt]

@DermalPunch fair enough. Lived experience over hearsay. Men won’t want you as much when your older is a fact. And that hearsay DOES have an effect on dating potential. And we’re having kids later and later. It’s effecting the tax system in ways that’s going to be felt. I don’t support the tax system but We’ll all care when we’re forced to work at 65 cause the government can’t afford to let us retire lol.

[Child_Of_Dust]

@VanillaSalt Nice spiel! I think you are right about quite a bit of it and I think there are a lot more factors you haven't touched on as well. There are a lot of layers to the topic. I'll do some filling in:

You were thinking that if women get lots of physical intimacy they will undervalue it and instead desire commitment; while, stating men lack physical intimacy so they focus on that first prior to thinking of commitment. You also stated it takes a guy a while to become committed to a woman. You also mentioned how women hate being objectified... My answer: I don't like being physical because I want to know the person who I am with first. I think it is a way of showing respect towards men. I hate being objectified because I'm being seen for my body and not who I am. I had a lot of issues with my ex going on about how he wanted all this 'physical stuff' then tell me he didn't like me talking about my career as a biologist which I'm passionate for, and I told him dating me meant hearing about my career. (Obviously, he got dumped). I think if men were 'loved' only for their d@ck and not their character, eventually they would also have the same complaint about objectification. Imagine if a girl only cared about sleeping with you, but absolutely nothing else about you, and didn't want to hear a single word from your mouth. Guys sometimes treat girls this way. The media also pressures women to meet a particular standard that is brainwashing and creates low self-esteem, all this to meet what a guy wants sexually. Girls are told, able to be loved, they have to give away what is precious to them, their body! But instead they get used. Yes, it goes both ways. I'm simply talking from a women's point of view.

[Child_Of_Dust]

@VanillaSalt Next topic: Women filing 80% of divorces. This is probably a mix of a hundred different layers of why it is weighed on women. I'll picking this one apart. For one, I know a lot of guys where they will settle with any women as long as she has teeth, can read, okay appearance, and isn't annoying. Women have to think about the needs of their children, finances, and their own well-being. They often hit the case where their partner is supposed to be providing for the family but has let the ball drop. Maybe he is abusive. He will never file for divorce because the relationship is in his favour of laziness or selfishness. So the women divorces because she has to put her family and well-being first. Men also have pride which holds them in relationships as to not admit things are not working. Some men are selfless and don't want to make the move to divorce even though it should happen, because he doesn't want to leave an abusive wife. In traditional marriages men are seen as the provider and the women the giver (she gives herself), men as the figurehead who is boss over the relationship, women are vulnerable, etc. The women as being the 'server' in the relationship under the man being the head, is also the one who calls for the divorce when the head is no longer doing his duty... I think this makes sense. BUT in some religions only the man can divorce the wife, and can leave her on the streets without ANY compensation...

[Child_Of_Dust]

@VanillaSalt Another topic I'd like to raise is historical abuse towards women. Women was considered a man's possesion like owning sheep. This is man's ego and desire to dominante being pushed at women, who were weaker and couldn't defend themselves. Men even forcd women to wear burkas and head coverings out of ownership and so other men couldn't see her, but really it is another form of dominating. Women were not allowed to be educated or to drive. Etc. For the longest time, men thought they were smarter and more egotistical then women all around. I think women didn't fight much cause their nature is to be nurterers. They wanted to stay home and look after children, so that's what they did. It was actually judaism that treated women with more respect (historically) compared to many other societies. The torah even allowed women to divorce the man. etc. The women were not allowed to own property (downside). It makes sense why Christianity also pushed for equality between genders in a traditional sense. Ie, eventually women could be educated, own land, etc... When Christianity was established throughout North America and Europe, I think it makes sense why the Women's movement took place then, it was a safe place for women to finally speak up.

[VanillaSalt]

@Child_Of_Dust I don’t necessarily think men will focus physical intimacy as they want the relationship on a grander scale but as physical intimacy is the easiest to get with the least effort many tend to focus on that and lose sight of the big picture and stop too early or else “take what they can get” and choose bad partners. Hell I’ve got a choice to make myself and pick someone who’s not a match for me or someone I value more… if men want kids these are the choices we gotta make and we don’t get as many chances to make this choice as women.

Men want the physical and don’t care who they get it from while your wanting to know them first. Your way is best for picking a partner and ours is best for racking bodies. It’s a balance cause women get to choose that’s why I feel comfortable blaming man hoes on women rather then men lol. I respect a woman that wants to take it slower and get to know someone first. It makes you look more valuable and less likely to cheat to me.

Again on objectification… you don’t wanna be seen for the wrong reasons but we just wanna be seen. I don’t think a woman will ever understand being ignored. Cry and people come to help. Post a selfie and simps swarm. Complain and the government/society moves mountains to make you happy.

I agree that we would think the same if the problem were the same. But their not. Again men will take what they can get because they don’t get what women get. Bad attention is better then none. Look at children that misbehave for attention. I want you to imagine never being talked to in public… every comment on social media getting completely ignored unless you get a lucky 1 like per 20 posts. Imagine the closest you ever feel to people is when you sleep with them… I can see why women hate the treatment they get but most men don’t even get that treatment. Although women do want men to step up and “be a man” to pay the bills but when we complain about mens rights women shush us about how we’re misogynist…

[VanillaSalt]

@Child_Of_Dust I have a theory of brainwashing… your accents a form of “brainwashing”. It’s called a “worsh rag” not a wash rag. Every feeling we have is based off personal experience and bias we inherited from family and friends. Society and the people around us. And not every “brainwashing” is a bad thing. Monogamy isn’t bad is it? Societies not bad. Well… on a general level it’s not ours sucks… religions not something everyone agrees with but ironically they all say not murder, rape, or pillage… aka don’t be a dick. There IS a better way to do everything and society was “better” overall when women were less equal…

I’m curious. Shouldn’t men and women strive to be desired by the opposite sex? Is it a good thing we now have “body positivity” so people think it’s ok to be 400 fucking lbs or a twig? We push beauty standards too far sure but… we’ll people don’t like ugly people. It sucks to say but an amazing person who’s ugly will always be trash in the opposite sex’s eyes. So yeah pushing men to workout and be gentlemen and women to be hot and modest is a good thing in my eyes.

I wanna be very clear. Nothing a woman can give is more precious to a man then her body. She can give him children with her body, a comfort that can’t be found anywhere else. Counter question to this argument. Why should men date women and not men instead? What’s the difference? Their bodies the difference without it their just men. And let’s be clear that’s women misunderstanding the message. The real message is your beauty and body have value beyond anything else you have so treasure them and take care of them. Don’t just give them away to the first man that wants some… that’s the message I see. It’s what I tell women on here too. If you’ll put out in the first date I’m not saying no but if you hold off for a month or two you can vet out the worst men and lessen your risk. I’ll respect you more too.

We’re both commenting on our points of view on this. Again the grass is always greener

[VanillaSalt]

@Child_Of_Dust there’s many layers here yes. Christians and the people with multiple divorces… my numbers don’t account for that. But I really hated your comment “it women having to think of the kids”. We have a system in place that pushes women to file for divorce. I don’t like taking a choice from women like divorce but… like abortion, having an easy way out makes people not think about consequences. I believe we need a… finality to our choices. In a situation a man’s not being a man that’s on him but who should we favor the man or woman? But i have considered this possibility that men get lazy and women just de facto file before. I just don’t know the numbers… and what’s best for family hoping he’ll turn around or doing it herself? Let’s be honest. She’ll do it herself alone anyway so having a second partner pulling at least SOME weights still gonna be better in Most cases. Clean the home or pay 1 single bill? Unless the atmospheres trash and he’s completely useless then it’s better for the family to stay together. If the burden he places is equal to or less then he bring to the family it’s best to keep him around. And you can’t say women don’t do the exact same thing… my ex stopped cleaning after the first year… complete stop. I was working 60 hrs per week for years. Where the fuck was my clean home? I had to do it. She worked too but refused to clean home. If we both refused what you think the house looked like?

[VanillaSalt]

@Child_Of_Dust And it’s not pride that keeps us… it’s 1 alimony. 2 options. 3 we are content in less then ideal circumstances. 4 when it’s done we’re alone again… but pride isn’t even a top 50 on my list for why men stay… your whole view of marriages wrong. Men ARE the leaders and here’s why. You need a leader to take charge in emergencies. Even government recognizes this and gives the president unilateral wartime power. Besides women are attracted to qualities of leadership. How you gonna be attracted to a leader then complain he leads? Men make more money. We work more hours, do harder more dangerous jobs. We are the ones on the front lines when the bastards try and take you from us. We are the ones with the gun and slippers at night when there’s a noise at night. When the spider scares the girls we smash it because it’s disrupting the family.(I don’t I set it free but lol) we take all the risk for keeping the family safe and if the family goes hungry we take all the blame for not keeping them fed. That’s what it means being a leader. You take the best and worst of everything. The wife’s duty is to submit. I don't know why women hate this word. Submission means to support and follow not be walked on. Women play an important role just as men do and if one side don’t understand that role the whole system collapses.

Let’s also stay away from history… women arnt property anymore. They can now vote… ironically they can vote without being part of the draft which means men are being oppressed there… let me ask you honestly. Do you think powers pointless? The world runs on power. Even the meek plebs have power if they come together. Government has guns but if all of the general public come together they wouldn’t stand a chance… men are more powerful then women and thus their in control. That won’t change. Every system of control is defended via force. The difference is your okay with being told not to murder or else… when your told don’t be a slut or else you get angry.

[VanillaSalt]

@Child_Of_Dust I would be happy in a world of women being owned by their husbands… you would be happy in a world where men were owned by their wives. The real issue isn’t who owns who it’s how they treat them. I’ve thought about this… my wife don’t need rights. I’m not looking to lock her in a basement or make her wear a hood on her head. I’m not looking to take unnecessarily from her or make her do or give anything I wouldn’t be willing to do or give. I ask the family be put first. I worked on average 70hrs a week for the last 4 years… if I gotta come home and clean… shop… cook… what do I have you for? What good are you to me what do you bring to the table? Sex? Okay then I guess your a series of holes then. Companionship? You just got done bitching I don’t clean around here! With companions like you I’m better off alone. I work my fucking ass off I do have expectations. But I don’t think their unfair.

Men actually are smarter. By range it’s pretty average but men makeup the very smartest and the very dumbest people. And being egotistical isn’t a good thing. em are violent and dominating because women like men with power. It’s always been that way. Like women have been nurturers. And without men supporting them women have died young… women needed to be needed or they were cast from society. They died of people didn’t like them. Makes sense women would weaponize it lol.

Funny thing about rights… only only have them until someone with more power then you takes them away. Your only ever allowed to do what your allowed to do. If the government suddenly takes abortion for instance your forced to suffer the pregnancy your “right” to abortion means nothing. It’s just a matter of treating people the way you wanna be treated… fucking religious texts are way to big to get such a simple point across.

[Slartybartfast]

For me and my friends it was.. there comes a point where the costs outweigh the benefits. I just wasn't willing to put up with the double standards and misandry anymore. Especially when you don't want sex with them anymore, they can't give you the children you wanted and they still want you to jump through hoops like a trained monkey for their attention and demand you meet a list of requirements they couldn't meet themselves.

The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results.

It's a strange game, the only winning move is not to play.

[Starlight007]

I think men are the lucky ones because women younger than 30 are with 30+ year old men and the older the guy gets his still lucky because most women want to be with older men. Men also tend to prefer women younger than 30 or younger than themselves because younger women are more youthful looking and they are attracted to that.

but when it comes to women its a bit different because most men do not want to be with older women over 30 because that's when most of them start becoming infertile and most men want to have kids. However they are men who prefer 30+ women over younger women so they may be at an advantage in that sense, but I mean a majority of 30+ men prefer women who are younger than them.

Do not get me wrong I'm not saying aging is bad, aging is a wonderful thing and its a blessing because nowadays a lot of people die young, but like everything that's good aging comes with it implications that's how nature works we just got to accept it!

[chris_987]

But it's works the same way, when I was younger girls my age would always date guys older and look down upon guy there age. But now that I'm 30 I dont look at girls my age because girls in there 20's look upto me. The same way those girls my age look upto older men.

[shaysh87]

@chris_987

late 20s to early / mid 30s is a man's prime. Once most guys hit 40, thats when they stop attracting chicks in their 20s.

[chris_987]

Naww girls are hypergamos. So there always looking for the best option. If a guy is 40 but he has money status and wealth. She no longer see age. That's why some young girls will turn me down but go after Michael B. Jordan or Drake even though we're all the same age.

[shaysh87]

@chris_987

reality is, vast majority of guys don't have either status or wealth by the time they hit 40

[chris_987]

It doesn't matter, aslong a girl think she has a chance with a guy with status she will be obviously to the fact that most guys don't have status and money. Like if Justin Bieber messages a girl. She will feel like she has the ability to get a guy like that. We're as guys don't think like that. If Rhianna messages me or a normal girl that is poor messages me I'd still want them both. I wouldn't all of sudden think the poor girl is beneath me.

[shaysh87]

@chris_987

Vast majority of young women aren't looking for a MSN 15 to 20 years older. I can assure you of that. Take a look at the marriage statistics.

[chris_987]

The vast majority of women will message a celebrity or leave thirsty comments on some guy she thinks is higher value, so obviously not all of them are gonna marry a rich dude but the fact that they hold money is such high regard you can conclude that they respect it more than a guy who has nothing going for himself.

[kaylaS91]

My dating life only really got started at 28.
I’d been in a 7 year long relationship prior to that but because I was too young at the start to know what was acceptable and what wasn’t, a lot of toxic/manipulative behaviours became normalized for me in a partner.


Only after that (plus some unrelated wisdom/maturity) do I truly feel confident in the dating world. My boyfriend is 34 and I love how, partially due to his age, he’s definitely got his shit together as well.

[OpenClose]

That's what I thought.

Then I turned 30 and it seems like a lot of girls are suddenly "I won't date a guy unless his is within 6 months of my age" and then nearly every girl around my age is married.

It's like those jobs that want to hire new graduates but they need to have 10 years of experience. But when they have 10 years of experience they are suddenly too old for the job.

Maybe I just need to get out of the Midwest.

[Anonymous]

It’s because young woman get pursued more. A young woman who remains bitter and fools herself that her career and her pet cat is real love she’s kidding herself. When a young woman understands her mistakes and puts herself out there it’s much easier to find man. For guys is tougher because women judge far more on every aspect. As guys get older, his window is closing/narrowing. However, when women get older their sex drive lowers, their youthful looks fade and all she’s left with are her mistakes and missed opportunities of not capitalizing on a guy who liked her and showed her respect. But alas life has to be difficult because people have crazy high expectations and stupid fantasies.

[Vegasrunner]

Life is all about perspective. When you're 18 being 30 feels like the end of your life. Reality is life really doesn't get started till around 30. Because of social media more young people are convinced that their are 20 year old millionaires falling from the sky when in reality most men dont reach peak earnings until around 45.

[Ευδεμονια]

I can say it’s a bit true, especially after the 25 y. o. for my personal experience every thing related to dating is over. At 25 your body starts the physical decline (obviously you are an adolescent so the body is healthy, but it stops growing and improving), the mind starts taking things slower and you got less time because of work.

[menina]

I know right? Many people believe that once you're 30 your life is over. It's not just your dating life is your life in general. I hate that!!!
I guess it's because we live in a world where youth is praised and maturity is underrated.

[mobiusforniner]

Im married and in my 30s and i get WAY more attention from women than i ever did 10 years ago. I think men get more attractive with age whereas, for women, its harder to find a guy cuz the good ones all get taken. There are many beautiful 30+ women out there.

Problem is, their options are limited. They get either basement dwelling trolls who live off doritos chips and games; or divorced and bitter dads paying a lifetime of child support...

[anon1903]

Mostly because the biological clocks start to tick and things can get serious pretty quick. Majority want to settle down after 30, if you haven't kudos to you.

I personally don't go for age gaps, it causes many misunderstandings in my opinion. But you're very right — a lot of women dig older men. Good luck.

[FictionalCharacter]

There are women in their 30s who didn’t settle yet and men in their 30s who are divorced with kids. It’s usually men with more baggage in their 30s than women. Because men claim they were trapped in a relationship in their 20s and never left the toxic relationship. That it built up over time along with the children and exes. While women have higher standards and never settled for less and became career oriented.

[FilmGuy93]

Dating after 30 is supposedly harder, but I'm a firm believer that people just need to work on their personalities. Your looks go downhill from your 20s, apparently, but I've met a lot of hotties in their mid-30s.

Women especially, will trip over themselves to date someone with a genuinely magnetic personality. Just don't be a jerk and your age won't be an issue.

[VRCXZ]

Once people turn 30, it's very, very difficult, if not impossible to have conversations that are actually fun and don't feel like job interviews. I would argue it happens at 25 years ago, as people mature and just stop caring about having fun or making friends.

[kinggeorge007]

That's relieving. I mean I don't actively seeking to date, but if I had a chance I will give it a shot. I don't date older women. 25+ probably.

The thing is I prefer slightly mature women, but the pool is pretty shallow in that age group. People have just started to divorce their first marriage in that age group. Not many is available.

That's why it looks like there's no one to date.

[ODC2112]

After the age of 30, appearance begins to matter less. If your way of dating was based on that you are left out. A good part of women have only appearance (given by nature) they do not make any investment that makes them pleasant outside the physical part and their possibilities become the same as those of males.

[DermalPunch]

I don't know what I'm supposed to vote but a shocking amount of young people prefer older people. In my day it wasn't so much. But social media wasn't what it was and people were still somewhat normal with basic human decency.

[Asker]

so is liking older bad?

[DermalPunch]

No. Of course not.

[midnightmoon05]

Who is everyone? I just got remarried. We dated six years.

[Jamie05rhs]

That's because you're a quality woman.

[midnightmoon05]

@Jamie05rhs thank you Jamie. You too deserve to find a quality woman to be a part of your life. Enjoy the journal.

[midnightmoon05]

Journey *

[Jamie05rhs]

@midnightmoon05 Thanks!