Is this a good flow for a new relationship?

[Anonymous]

For some context, we are both 26 years old and met on Hinge back in early June, we went on subsequent dates almost every weekend, which included dinner dates, movies, bowling, mini golfing, shopping, and board game cafes, and late August made things official during a brunch date. For each date also important to note I brought along fun dating conversation cards that helped us open up. We are both new to the relationship world; this is our first serious relationship, and we are both virgins.

Since making things official in late August, we have continued going on dates, on weekends, and sometimes on Fridays, and as of earlier this month, he took me to his work gala and introduced me to his co-workers; I have also been introduced to a few of his friends, and as of recently I was briefly introduced to his mother and brother before his hockey game.

We kiss every time after our date; as he dropped me off and yesterday, he held my hand as we hiked in total darkness during a Halloween party as I was wearing short heels.
We text each other about three times a week before our weekly date to check in, as he told me that he would rather us text less, as our time together is more special to him than texting every single day.

With that being said, I'm new to the relationship world, lol we have not done anything sexual yet, as we had a short discussion on this, and we did agree to discuss anything before we try.

With that being said, we are both shy, so do you have any advice on how we should progress in our relationship?

Thanks!

[mattdzz]

I don't think anyone on here has anything worthy to tell you guys- you both seem very wholesome, and are heading in a positive direction.

[Kinkyhubby]

One of you is going to have to make a move one way or the other. But that is up to you both and should have a conversation about it

[BarryLiverstone]

Yes I’m thinking of lots of advice. But where do you want the relationship to go to? How deep are your feelings for him?

[Asker]

I hope the relationship will be something long term, as we are both 26 already and I have deep feelings for him, I really do like him and I overall feel safe and secure with him.

[BarryLiverstone]

I’m glad you feel secure with him as that’s important. Him constantly meeting with you must have made your feelings deepen. However it sounds like you all should be making more progress. So I’ll throw out a few ideas:

1. Plan a trip with him. Could be over a weekend or a week. Go somewhere new. It’s an adventure and can help you both figure out how to work as a partnership.

2. Find a ‘mentor’ couple. Could be your parents or a married couple you both trust. They can be there to support you and can offer suggestions when you all hit issues.

3. Explore sexuality. Yes you are still virgins but after an entire summer together it’s ok to Google topics and discuss so you learn more together. You are not just friends so flirt and go beyond just a kiss

4. Discuss your holidays (Thanksgiving and Christmas plans) as things to look forward to. Also discuss other goals you can accomplish together. You are now official so don’t need to limit spending time to just dates

Make sense? Or what else did you wanna know?

[Asker]

Thank you so much for the advice!!
In regards to trips, he did mention to me about two weeks ago that his family is potentially planning a trip to Seattle, so that is something he would like to bring me along ; however, they are just in the planning stages. However, I will suggest a short road trip :)!

Thank you!! This is such a good idea! When we first met, he did mention he had asked his parents for advice alongside his friends in terms of relationship advice, but they didn't comment on too much, so I will certainly look into that.

Such a good idea! I will add that to the list, lol when I visited his home about two weeks ago for the second time, he did take me to his bedroom to show me his new bed sheets and had me sit on his bed to try out the mattress the first time I visited, so I'm unsure if this is a sign he wanted to escalate something? He also designated a full bathroom to me and wants to ensure the decor is to my taste.
We were also playing around, and I touched the top of his hand slowly; he said he liked it but got shy and apologized, but I will undoubtedly suggest we google topics and discuss.

Thank you! He will be taking me to his work Christmas party in December; however, I will add this to the list, alongside discussing goals and so forth.

This makes all sense! Thank you once again!!

[BarryLiverstone]

You are welcome. Overall if he’s shy at you touching his head then he’s gotta come out of his shell and feel more free to express how he feels. That will take time, as he shouldn’t have to apologize yk? Based on that try to find friends who are a couple and don’t rely on his parents as he would feel embarrassed to ask them real questions (sexual or otherwise)

When you start to Google and research, learn about escalating. For example you held hands and that was comfortable.. maybe next you touch each other’s faces or necks when you kiss.. then you start to touch lower than the neck. The key to escalating is to have someone lead and go slow in case someone doesn’t feel comfortable.

[Asker]

Ok, Thank you so much once again for the insight!!!

[Asker]

Hi

I guess I should post an update; this past weekend, we had a 2-hour session exploring things and went beyond kissing for like 2 hours, and it went well, he said he did some research so Thanks for your advice!

[BarryLiverstone]

Thank you for the update. Happy to see things are going well