It’s been almost 2 1/2 years with mine (on and off) with the longest hiatus being 2 months. We’ve ended things twice, and this is our 3rd rodeo. I call us friends with benefits but we’re technically much more than that, but we do not consider ourselves a couple or in a relationship. Just casual.
We get along just fine. It’s just that we can only mess around for so long then we have to pull away from each other because things get intense and lines blur. He ended the 1st time but came right back. I ended it the 2nd time and told him I was falling hard and is being friends only would make this easier for all. A month later, we are back in each others arms and beds.
Can we keep this going long term? I failed to mentioned we are neighbors. So this kinda adds to the why it’s so hard to stay away from each other? I should also add that us being neighbors is his prime reasoning for not wanting to date me seriously/exclusively as this has come up before in our conversations.
So back to my question-can a friends with benefits be a long term arrangement? Or is someone bound to get hurt and this gets messy?
What Girls & Guys Said
Opinion
1Opinion
No, friends with benefits is not meant to be a long term thing. It’s also the worst idea to straddle the line because of how casual the arrangement is supposed to be. If you have stronger feelings than friends, you date. If he won’t date you, then you cut it off. But traveling down this road, you will undoubtedly get hurt. It will always be something, even if one moves away and I don't know what being neighbors matters, to me that’s like way more convenient to date so I don't know, it’s excuses on his end to me.
If both parties are haply with the arrangement then yes you can, but if you or he dosent then it is best to end things for both parties. If you have feelings for him or he has for you it is best you inform one and other because the feeling may be mutual or if it isn't its best to find out now then down the line and one of you guys potentially getting hurt.
i've had friends with benefits since high school, it's nice to have guys you're comfortable with