Coffee or meal date?

[Anonymous]

I’ve been out of the dating scene for about 5 years after my last relationship ended. So, I’m here looking for opinions or advice! I see that nowadays the guys on dating apps want to meet up so quickly lol. Is this normal? Tbh, I’m good with coffee or light meal cuz it’s chill and if I don’t have any further interest with that person, it’s also easier to break it off and maybe we can be friends not friends with benefits after. But I’m on the fence of accepting coffee dates lol cuz I’m influenced by social media where people say not to accept coffee dates as it’s super low effort. I’m on the dating app to make new connections and see where it’ll go. Not really in a place to look for a relationship just yet but I’m definitely not looking for something casual or a hook up. I’m hesitant because my last ex boyfriend don’t do coffee date with me lol. We took quite some time to get to know each other before we meet and he planned a light dinner and drinks date in a pretty good rooftop bar. But lol, the guys I’ve talked to briefly seemed kinda cheapskate? I don’t know.. COFFEE or BIG MAC? Bruh, Big Mac? Meh, I don’t want that. I can eat that anytime I want hahahaha. Don’t bash me for having my own opinions cuz I’m allowed to. 🙃 Feel free to chime in!

[NamerOfStars]

They're not "being cheap", they're just not trying to impress you with wealth. Like you yourself said, it's a less formal and easier-to-break-off-if-it's-going-nowhere method- why would you not extend them the same courtesy? Presumably, if you DID hit it off, they'd (ideally both of you'd) expand into bigger and more effortful and expensive stuff.

[Asker]

Yea true that! Thanks for your opinion:) I’d just see how it goes!!

[In_Trance]

You have been out for a while.

Yes it's normal to meet up quickly; what's the point in text back and forth for days or weeks?
Yes a coffee or "big Mac" is normal for a first meet up. It has nothing to do with being a cheapskate. What happens if you meet up for a fancy meal and decide it's not a good match? Now you've spend a lot of money... for nothing.
It's normal to meet up for the first and even second time and pay your own way. once you agree there's something there, then the fancy meal will happen

[Asker]

Ah I see! Interesting! I think maybe Ill just do drinks.. I don’t wanna be meeting someone new to just eat MCD it’s just weird fir me lol

[KrakenAttackin]

Asker "drinks"? Alcohol rarely equates to good decision making.

[Asker]

Nah I mean like boba tea or cocktails HAHAH or desserts

[Anonymous]

you say coffee date is super low effort, but it's actually ideal. you're trying to ease back into it, if it goes nowhere you can easily cut off, coffee is a cheap date to test the waters. so honestly it's your best option from what i read of your goals for this.

[Asker]

Thanks for ur opinion!! Sounds good it seem. :)

[xCherryKizz]

Coffee is the go to for me. No stress on either party to pay more for a date that doesn't work out too

[Asker]

That make sense! Thanks for ur opinion:)

[KrakenAttackin]

Coffee. Meals are only for women we are sleeping with.

[Asker]

Interesting insight! Why hahah

[KrakenAttackin]

Because men are tired of paying for foodie calls.

[Asker]

Ooooo.. LMAO.. I mistook one of the guy's message & I asked why Big Mac? He said that the only food that can be afforded after a meal cuz too full.. LOL.. so he planned to have a dinner date 😅

[Lookitsmadmax1994]

Coffee ☕️