Can you be FWBs and truly never catch feelings?

[DopeTurtle]

I know it’s theoretically possible but I’m very curious to hear about your own personal experiences. I want to hear your stories and how you navigate the situations/ flings.

Please feel free to go anonymous if you want

Yeah i can

Someone always ends up with feelings

[quaranta]

I have been in these situations although they transformed into relationships and they got feelings, not me.
I think a situation where FWBs are really possible for me (where I'd be sure the guy wouldn't get feelings) is with some childhood friends or exes from at least 10+ years ago and with no bitter feelings left. That means someone who can't imagine to be romantically attached to me (and I couldn't as well).
Out of boredom I and a childhood friend could have some sex time to time but our bond wouldn't improve from that because we explored that already and its limits, we know exactly what we don't like of each other etc. No room to get into each other at all I would say, no room for discovery. And I think no jealousy would kick in if we find a partner, because we both know we don't consider each other potential partners, and care about each other's path in life independently. (However it would be a bit strange to do that with a childhood friend though).
I'm not saying that people outside this configuration couldn't have any real friends with benefits but that makes it more safe from feelings. Of course there are for sure cases of working FWBs who are not childhood friends or old exes.
The rule should be that: both the participants know by fact that each other don't want to date each other but are actively looking for a real partner to commit to, which is not the friends with benefits. And so, being ready to stop it when one of the two starts dating someone else. If this is an agreeable condition for both then it's easier. While if starting a friends with benefits means like a way to get a romantic chance with that person that is definitely the worst mistake to make while looking for a relationship, since friends with benefits is precisely meant to describe:"you are not dating material for me".

[Anemone978]

I personally couldn't do it... I thought I could and decided to try it once but I caught feelings for him hahaha... I don't know how he feels... he blocks me and adds me back all the time... I told him I don't want to hookup with out a relationship so he blocked me 2 weeks ago when I said that... but he messaged and called me today asking if we could please connect and I said I want a relationship again... and he said come see him don't say no... but I said no... I met him 2 times but only sort of hooked up with him once and that was months ago I don't get why he doesn't just delete me forever... he has 2 other "friends" that I know of...

[OlderAndWiser]

FIrst, you need to think about the definition of FWBs. If your relationship doesn't fit the defintion, then you are really fwbs, are you?

And the real question should not be "is it possible" but, instead, you should ask "how often does it happen?"

[SnowedIn]

It is possible yes. Works for some and not for others. The danger, I think, lies in the 'F'. When you're friends, you always have the opportunity for it to fall over the millimeter small line from friends to feelings.

[Twalli]

I can't have sex without being in love with another, so I could never be in an friends with benefits relationship unless I know we can't get married. For example, if my girlfriend and I discover we can't get married we'll probably continue having a sexual relationship until one of us finds someone else.

[Haha456]

you can only get feelings when you "kinda liked them romantically" in the first place. but you just didn't realize it early on.

sex causes attachment, not romantic feelings.

[Anonymous]

No you can't. The friends with benefits thing burns out pretty fast. If you want something more lasting, go for the fuck buddy status. As much as I despise Tinder, it's better than a friends with benefits thing. If you go for the fuck buddy thing, play by the rules. If you expect monogamy, you can kiss it all goodbye.

[AsaKyo]

I don't know, I don't participate in that dumb crap