Does playing hard to get work for girls?

Question

My cousin says the best way to get a guy is to ignore him

Gingerbread_GB · Accepted Answer

The problem is the "play" part, you are pretending to be something you are not, and that usually doesn't work out in the end.

Imagine a girl playing hard to get to make a guy fall for her. He desperate seeks her attention. But at some point she has to show her true feelings unless she's just playing him. When she actually gives him the attention, the whole mystery goes away, he'll realize that she's just a normal girl with normal feelings, not the person he originally went crazy over. He'll feel cheated in the end.

So play the game if you want, but don't expect anything long term.

Spade_01 · Accepted Answer

No, not playing hard to get but truly being hard to get works. It shows that the woman knows her worth and isn't pretending to be worthy just to get the guy.

Pinay_ako · Answer

🤣 it could backfire. If a grown person starts playing mind games with me, that’s a red flag to not waste time on someone who’s not sure if they want to know me or not.

Avicenna · Answer

No, it doesn't. Showing some interest does work.

RangerBlue22 · Answer

Whoa. Whoa. Whoa.

Most women are already naturally much more choosy, picky and a pain in the ass when it comes to all of this. They often subconsciously shit test (some intentionally do it). They fall in love slower. Generally they aren’t as visually stimulated as men are. They often self sabotage themselves by rejecting men over fickle issues.

A lot of this is due to evolutionary factors. Women can get stuck with the baby. Historically they need a man to provide and protect them. Also female promiscuity was deeply frowned upon (at best) in most cultures over history.

With that said when women have a crush on a guy some of them can go absolutely nuts. They obsess over him and self control goes out the window. But they almost never have that kind of crush on a guy who already obviously feels the same way about them. It’s usually a guy who only feels so so about them or has very good self control not to show his feelings.

Anyway your cousin probably had a few bad experiences chasing guys that were out of her league and being too open about her feelings.

However again women already very picky much to most guy’s aggravations. Women also usually don’t need approach. They usually can just wait to be approached and that puts them in a position where they can accept/reject. In most dating scenarios they have huge advantage over men. Don’t screw up a possible good thing when a guy sticks his neck out.

RavVid · Answer

Not now, when girls will call the cops if you say Hi.

Hard to get with Yes-No-Maybe gets me hard every time. I'm a complete sucker for it.

If that doesn't make sense let me explain. The girl indicates interest, then appears to revise that to no she isn't interested, followed by another revision that she might be interested after all which sets up another loop around the mulberry bush.

It works because at first I think I'm gonna get in, then it puts up a challenge for me to smash through, then she turns out to be persuadable. I can be left hard for a week after that.

Ms_Facesitter · Answer

I always thought that was a stupid thing to do. Ignoring someone is avoiding someone. Telling someone "hey I don't like you." Why would you do that when you like him? It makes no sense.
That's not playing hard to get, that's playing "hard to like"

PizzaDaddyo · Answer

Not really. I couldn’t see much success using this method with certain women and I wouldn’t recommend this style of play. Lol. Just because men are supposedly more expected to initiate. It’s part of being a man, knowing what you want and going for it. Playing hard to get slims the man’s chances down drastically and if he’s serious about something he should get off his lazy ass and start loving.

serious · Answer

No, it does not work. That is a childish and immature mind game. Best is to show your interest, make it clear to the guy that you like him and if he does not reciprocate then it is best to forget about that guy and move on.

This is the most mature thing to do and is the best. Simple also.

HighValue · Answer

No. That is something immature people do. Then the other person could take it as no interest, or they may think it means the person playing hard to get will not put in effort themselves and nobody enjoys being in a one sided relationship. I think it is best when people are just honest about their feelings.

Anpu23 · Answer

Imagine you are a guy who has heard his whole life "no means no" and if she isn't interested it's time to move on. Now what kind of a guy will still approach if she seems uninterested? Someone who's respectful? Is that the kind of guy you want to attract? Sure it might work on some type of guys, but the kind you want in your life?

FilmGuy93 · Answer

Not particularly well, no. The thing is, any man worth your time is going to hear you say "no" and respect your decision. Playing hard to get only works when you make it clear that you are actually interested, but are still making up your mind about him.

There aren't many women who have the social skills today to know how to do that.

EricSummer · Answer

Ignoring him goes too far. He may be discouraged and see this as rejection.

Still, playing hard to get is an essential feminine strategy. Most girls will be slower to answer a guy on text, for example, and they may use fewer words initially. It can be annoying, but it still often has the desired effect. We value more what is difficult to get, not only in dating.

Static_In_The_Attic · Answer

If I like someone I’ll let them know & if they play hard to get I simply move on & look for someone else.

Razp_Sorbet · Answer

No, and I don't think it's anything a sane woman would do. If a woman is playing hard to get then let her continue playing and run in the opposite direction. She's got problems that are not worth the effort.

BungusHighFivePizza · Answer

Doesn't work on me. I just multitask. All right, this girl hard to get. I play the field. Hard to get here, easy to get there, super easy to get here, kinda hard to get there.

razelove · Answer

Maybe in high school. Not at our age though. Hell, ask yourself, would it work if I played hard to get with you? Even if I have money, looks, and a captain cool vibe, it doesn't matter if I never express that I want to get into your pants.

purplepoppy · Answer

Guys already find getting a girl difficult. If she's not responsive he's not going to waste time risking rejection, he'll look elsewhere.

Anonymous · Answer

Nowadays men do not lack women. If not one, then the other woman. Men adjust to anyone, anywhere. If they are interested in someone from the heart, the girl does not need to be hard to get.

trvial · Answer

We absolutely hate when girls do this, but on a deep psychological level, it does work. It's just very unethical and immature to force a guy to chase you. Make your interest in him known and you'll still get the same end result, minus the egoic power trip.

admles · Answer

Nope, most guys despise this type of manipulative behaviour and won’t waste our time on women who do it.

Phoenix98 · Answer

That's poor advice and I wouldn't suggest following it, the best to get a guy to not chase you is to ignore him.

RealMarek · Answer

Typically not, especially if you’re trying to cause him to feel initial attraction toward you.

SAMI_DABBAB · Answer

I'm a guy, I consider it a red flag, if you're gonna tire me out for dopamine I'm simply gonna look for a serious person, this behavior is unacceptable from an adult but understandable from a younger person

AnusNdaPainus · Answer

No this is why ghosting exists and women get ghosted more than men  The best looking man you know has less standards than the ugliest woman you know

slatyb · Answer

Games are for children. If I ask a woman out and she declines, I'm not asking again.

imawfulatusernames · Answer

It’s better not to play games. Not to mention that this line of thinking encourages men to keep pursuing you after a genuine no

jamesgoldman · Answer

No, here a guy can go to prison for harassment if he pushes a woman for a date etc. So if a girl plays hard to get then it's best to abandon her

aoihewgf · Answer

Not for me. I wouldn't put so much time and effort into trying to get some girl to go out with me when there are billions of others.

mommymommymommy · Answer

No. It just messes with him, and annoys him. The quickest way to a mans heart, as well as a girls hear, a la, ice nine kills, is through their ribcage

Pohjolan · Answer

Its counter signaling. A bit like a guy not taking care of its facial hair and wearing broken clothes.

However only a high tier person can pull that off and only on some.

If a gal plays hard to get then I'd just move on.

DizzyDesii · Answer

I never used that sillyass technique. I put in the same effort i expect to receive

AaronKrieger · Answer

For most guys it does, but do not push it. You have to throw us a bone

TacosRAwesome · Answer

Might work if he already wants you really badly. But normally it doesn't.

Redstang88 · Answer

Nope. This isn’t highschool, I’m far too old for those games

Snedger____ · Answer

Partially true. If it’s for a relationship, if a guy is attracted to you, it doesn’t matter if you play it hard or easy. but too easy may create a “casual relationship” vibe.

Catsdaddy24 · Answer

What is hard to get, don't play games, hard to get should only he in the form of you not wanting any relationship and someone comes along and changes your mind

Forceinhand · Answer

I move along very quickly from girls playing childish games.

ChiTown33 · Answer

It works until the guy figures out the game she's playing. Then NOTHING she does works after that.

zagor · Answer

Most guys will return the favor if you do that. Don't listen to your cousin.

the_sinner · Answer

Most guys nowadays hate This behaviour and think that the girl is too self absorbed. They don’t pursue her anymore.

CB-Raido-Time · Answer

No interest shown translates into interest lost.

hammeronfire · Answer

Don’t play hard to get. Quickest way to make us lose interest

Europa789076 · Answer

no if a girl does that instant turnoff and i find someone else.

SpaceGalaxy · Answer

sometimes it does... most of the time, it does not

Mimi_758 · Answer

your cousin is some what right :)

dudeinohio · Answer

Mind game. I'd just move on.

shortster · Answer

It doesn't work on me.

DizzyAster2 · Answer

If she ignores me, I'll just move on.

Anonymous · Answer

Yeah if you wanna work his way out of his game

sravmr123 · Answer

Not a great plan

Does playing hard to get work for girls?

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