I’ve been hot and cold with this guy for the past two months. Started off great, amazing chemistry, etc.
Then it kind of cooled off when I asked if we could be friends because he just got out of a relationship.
I confided in him recently that I’m going through some pretty major stuff and it’s causing a lot of emotional suffering for me.
He had no idea what I was going through and was very apologetic. He asked me to let him know if I needed anything. He texted me at midnight last night and asked how I was feeling and to let him know if I needed anything. I texted him this morning and told him I really needed someone to talk to because I’m feeling lonely and isolated.
He’s making time for me to meet over the weekend in the evening so we can talk.
He’s used to seeing me strong, and in control of my emotions. His tone became more empathetic when I told him I was going through stuff.
I don’t even know if he has a girlfriend now.
But I’m curious if this sounds genuine or if he just wants to hop in bed with me again?
What Girls & Guys Said
Opinion
1Opinion
Like Kraken said, the “again” implies you’ve already slept together, and in that case then yeah, I’d think he’s trying to get laid. Even if that’s not the case (like you didn’t hook up), I don’t think you two could be friends on that level. It’s nearly impossible for men and women to remain platonic, especially given your history, knowing there was chemistry and you may still feel something for him. I think you’re leaning into him a lot more than you normally would if you weren’t feeling lonely/isolated, and he may not be the best shoulder to cry on. His intentions are questionable. If I were you I’d rather speak with other friends, a therapist or even a journal. He’s not your only outlet.
Thank you for your reply. He probably sees me now as vulnerable and easy target I guess. You’re definitely right about being friends with him because it seemed like he didn’t want to be friends at all after I cooled things down with us.
I guess if he wasn’t looking for a “friend” in the first place and wanted something more beneficial, then it makes sense for him to change once you cooled things down. The sucky part is that even if you continued reaching out to him and tried keeping things friendly, on his end he may see it as you playing hard to get or changing your mind. I see that male perspective on here so many times. It’s just better to keep your distance, reach out to those who love you and try to get through your struggles another way.
Yea, great points. I really did want to be friendly with him but he practically ghosted me. It wasn’t until we saw each other at a group event a few weeks ago that he started coming around again.
Yeah, you can do better when it comes to friends and not have to risk ill intentions🩵
Also, do you think it was weird he text me at midnight? He’s never done that before.
I don't know if I’d say it was weird, just because I’ve also gotten those late night texts. It’s possible that he was just awake and curious what you were up to, or that he has been drinking. Hard to know for sure. In any case though I wouldn’t answer any more of those lol.
"again"...😂😂😂
So you’re saying he just wants some action?