How can anyone's confidence be so low?

[Anonymous]

Recently, I started thinking about my life and things I wanted to do. I turned 28, and I didn't do anything. I didn't live my life.
My extreme lack of confidence has been making my life really difficult in every aspect, e. g., I can't look at myself because I find myself ugly, although people mostly tell me I look good, or at least average or "normal." But I don't think so. I just don't believe it. I hate it when I see my picture somewhere, and I try to avoid looking at it. Not to mention mirrors - those are my kryptonite. Never in my life have I taken a single selfie because I just can't stand looking at my face. I don't have profile pictures anywhere. People don't understand it and tend to get upset when I refuse to join them when taking photos.
I have difficulties joining conversations because "Why would anyone care what I think?"
When I see someone in need, I don't help them because I'm afraid I would fail somehow. When someone asks for help and there's more of us, I don't offer help because, "why would anyone need MY help?" This is the reason people often think I'm an arrogant douchebag. Although I just have an extreme and nonsensical lack of confidence.
I have never been able to develop any relationship with a woman. Yes, I am 28, and I am still a virgin. There were certain moments when I could have had sex, but I always stopped it. I started wondering how anyone could be able to like me. Why would anyone date me, let alone have sex with me? Just why? And that was it. The moment was gone. I had to make up something so that the girl didn't consider me the weirdo that I was, and I left.
Honestly, I haven't met anyone with such a lack of confidence as mine. It started driving me mad in the past weeks because I am almost 30, and I don't seem to be making any progress in life. Not to mention, I wasted the best years of my youth, and that's something I will regret till the end of my days. Has anyone experienced a similar problem, and did you manage to solve it?

[artgorgeous]

I've never experienced this, but maybe you shuld try developing yourself in some specific area/profession and become very good at it. They say if you spend 10000 hours on a skill, you become an expert in it (but i assume to you it might seem too late already). While you polish your skill, try to participate in events where you have to cooperate with people, and then step by step eventually try to give a speech on your research/observation/achievement in your skill. There are tons of conferences and you have to gradually gain communication skills. After you gain more confidence, more and more women might be interested in you plus you already have decent communication skills. Become at least very good at something, this will give you more confidence.

[Asker]

Thanks for your advice. Yes, I think all of this could help, but it's very difficult. I tried it already - join a conversation, talk to people, go on events. But I just don't seem to be able to improve my communication skills or gain any confidence. I think I need a therapist, but the problem is I have difficulties even going to groceries and asking for help if I need something, going to a hairdresser, or going to a workshop of my car breaks down. So, going to a therapist is another level.