Right now I just feel as if everything and everyone is against me. Now this is mainly about guys and my love life. All the guys I’ve liked have never liked me back and I never like those who are interested in me and I feel like that’s because I project what I’m usually used to onto those who do like me.
There’s this one guy who rejected me twice and a close friend of mine of 6 years decided to use me to hook up and then just left my life. I always try thinking of what’s wrong with me. I just know it’s because I’m short and as stupid as it sounds it’s true. I’m 4’11 and being the height of a 7th grader isn’t exactly ideal. It has always been an issue in the past when that’s always the reason why people I’m attracted to aren’t attracted to me. I’ve always heard “oh she’s too short for me” or regular comments regarding my height.
There’s this one guy who I had been talking to and dated. He seemed to love me a lot and while it was really sweet I didn’t feel the same no matter how hard I tried to. I don’t know what the problem was. He is attractive and extremely kind, but I think that since I’m so used to the bare minimum it’s hard to accept that someone actually likes me. I was projecting my experiences onto him. I broke up with him because I realised I just wasn’t emotionally available.
When I think about all this I just get extremely insecure because I just hate how my life is all together. I have extreme insecurities regarding looks. I wouldn’t say I look bad, people have liked me just not my height. I have a big surgical scar on my abdomen which I hate so much I literally hide it, and I have a lot of problems with my family. I always ask myself why I have to have all these problems, literally the whole package. I feel like I’m missing out on a lot as a teenager and I know it’s all normal to have a lot of feelings and caring a lot about certain things as a teen but I just feel like my situation is unfair.
There’s this one guy who rejected me twice and a close friend of mine of 6 years decided to use me to hook up and then just left my life. I always try thinking of what’s wrong with me. I just know it’s because I’m short and as stupid as it sounds it’s true. I’m 4’11 and being the height of a 7th grader isn’t exactly ideal. It has always been an issue in the past when that’s always the reason why people I’m attracted to aren’t attracted to me. I’ve always heard “oh she’s too short for me” or regular comments regarding my height.
There’s this one guy who I had been talking to and dated. He seemed to love me a lot and while it was really sweet I didn’t feel the same no matter how hard I tried to. I don’t know what the problem was. He is attractive and extremely kind, but I think that since I’m so used to the bare minimum it’s hard to accept that someone actually likes me. I was projecting my experiences onto him. I broke up with him because I realised I just wasn’t emotionally available.
When I think about all this I just get extremely insecure because I just hate how my life is all together. I have extreme insecurities regarding looks. I wouldn’t say I look bad, people have liked me just not my height. I have a big surgical scar on my abdomen which I hate so much I literally hide it, and I have a lot of problems with my family. I always ask myself why I have to have all these problems, literally the whole package. I feel like I’m missing out on a lot as a teenager and I know it’s all normal to have a lot of feelings and caring a lot about certain things as a teen but I just feel like my situation is unfair.
