Do you like talking to women?

[OddBeMe]

I think this plagues my kind. I see a lot of 20s guys asking for help. And gf’s rarely come from nowhere. You have to have a rep of smooth, known to be a good talker, easy flirt but still care about chicks.

Yes

No

[mandyfire98]

I think a lot of guys don't really like women outside of sex. Not all guys but a lot. I've noticed many men just don't really like us at all minus how we look. I see complaints all the time about women liking this and women liking that, don't like how we dress, don't like what we are into. A lot of guys want to make women into what they want instead of what we already are.

They don't want to know us or talk to us, pretty much just want to use our bodies. That's why you see so many opinions where guys claim men and women can't be friends. It's because they dont want to be friends with us. They only want sex. That's why guys ask other guys for advice about us instead of actually trying to ask us instead. They don't want to really talk to us or get to know us sadly because outside of fucking us they don't really care ror women at all.

Which is fine, if some guys don't like women then nobody is forcing you to like eomen but don't think that women are programmable robots that will magically just change completely just to take care of your needs. We are who we are and you either like us or you move on down the road.

For all the men that actually like being around women and talking to us and being friends with us even if sex isn't possible... You are truly mature and good people. Guys that truly enjoy being around women, genuinely, have Good Dick Energy.

The most hilarious part of that is that they aren't just in it for the sex but they're better with women because of their experiences with women so they'll end up getting laid more often anyway.

The "I hate women" crowd aren't the ones getting sex but are the one's most obsessed with getting laid.

[NathanDavis]

excellent take, and genuine insight... as always (=

[mandyfire98]

Thank you. It's just what I've noticed a lot. Not with every guy obviously but for the men that always always have negative viewpoints constantly about women. They just don't like anything about us at all and only want us for sexual gratification. I'd love to know the crossover between their views on women and if they have narcissistic personality disorder or antisocial personality disorder.

[NathanDavis]

yes, and it is true as well... these things happen way too often, and I've seen too as a guy

because many guys and men, have said some of these things to me... especially younger ones, around high-school and college age, they really don't know much about women, because they just don't care that much about actually getting to know women

they see the ones they like, they fantasize about the idea of sex with them... so they do fixate on their own selves "what do I do as a guy, to get her into bed" and then they assume they're in a competition with all other men around " everyone wants to get her in bed, so how I do win her over them" and this is when they upset themselves...

and, in this process... they never really considered these girls as... people, they don't really get to know women as women, nor a particular woman as an individual... it's sabotage, and it's a lack of care and then, all of that turns into resentment, these are of course the more extreme situations

but there's also many other guys who are actually more interested in women and not just their looks, but they're still clueless and struggling with these ideas which they get from these other idiots but also, they compare to the other guys who have a more normal and healthier with women, and actual relationships with women and tend to think that if a guy is "lucky with women" then that's just because he's either rich, or has this or that, you know... "perfect 10" and what not

[NathanDavis]

I met a couple, well a few of these guys who were younger than and me for some reason they looked up to me, so yeah... I had to smack them left and right to get some sense into them "you don't know women as they really are, this girl you like so much? you don't really know a thing about her, you NEVER spoke to her before, so number 1, do not idealize her, and number 2, do not crucify her either"

it took some time to make them truly understand about these things... because, they have first to do some other things with their own mindset, and then actually be better with other people around them, especially women... but they got there eventually, lol

today... they're much better man, and have a normal approach to women and people in general, they're both actually married... which is what they always wanted

[mandyfire98]

💯 this. Pure facts. These guys struggle with women but yet don't want to be friends with women or truly get to know them. So it's only sex they want but they never get it.

You however have an amazing view of women and outlook in general. I bet you don't ever have any issues with being successful with women. Funny how that works out. You've taken the time to be friends with women and truly get to know us. If I was single and knew you in real life, you'd be the one I'd be all over in a heartbeat.

[NathanDavis]

well, I would have to say that no, I don't have it an issue nor a struggle with either, being friends with women and/or being in a relationship with them because I actually am into that, and I do give it the proper time and effort and with the genuine dedication, friends or girlfriends... both

and yes, does work even better with someone that is also as genuine and also outstanding, as you are Mandy

[RandomUser1000]

I like talking to women when they are friendly and nice. :)

Women are usually less macho and more feminine then guys which can make them more pleasant to be around.

I think the main problem with talking to women is there is bigger risk of misunderstandings and such.
Like if a woman think you are interested in her (no matter if you are or not), if she's not interested in you it can lead to her treating you poorly or even hostile.

Men don't usually assume you are interested in them so you usually don't get those kind of misunderstandings.

Like if a a guy is "your bro" and chill and stuff you can even act like flirting and make gay jokes and stuff and can just laugh at it without having to mean something.

Girls are more likely to react to something dumb and cause drama.

Sometimes it would be easier if all of humanity was asexual to not cause those kind of misunderstandings.

To summarise
I don't like when girls act hostile.
But when they are genuinely nice and friendly, then sure they can be nice to talk to and be around.

[mandyfire98]

It's case by case. So yes there can be misunderstandings for sure but most of the time people pick up on social cues and understand. Very rarely is it to the point that someone gets offended over standard conversations. If the conversation goes into uncomfortable territory then there can be offense taken or something could be viewed as harassment or being creepy. Most people know how to socialize properly tho.

[RandomUser1000]

To put it simply,
I like when people are friendly and nice (without an ulterior motive),
Regardless of Gender.

[mandyfire98]

Yeah you gotta beware of the narcissists out there who take advantage of people.

[OddBeMe]

@RandomUser1000 not blaming you…but why do you think there’s so much gender blame game going on?

[RandomUser1000]

I don't know,

It seems like many times people like to "put others in boxes"
Not literally...
But like to make generalisations and assumptions without much care if it's true or not.

I mean I guess it sometimes can be useful.
Like you can get to know everyone on a deep level.

But sometimes it can be to much
It usually doesn't have to be like either you are on Side A or Side B with no other options.
Often you can just be you...

But often people tend to go into a we vs them kind of situation that in worse cases can lead to discrimination and hate and violence.

I don't really know why.
It's a complicated question.

I guess it to some extent is part of human nature.
But you still have choices.
You can choose to let it be part of you or you can refuse to discriminate and hate people just for being different then you.

[RandomUser1000]

meant to say
"you can't get to know everyone on a deep level"
can't = can not

[NathanDavis]

I actually like to get in boxes...

[RandomUser1000]

@NathanDavis Maybe you are a cat?

[NathanDavis]

[Apple1996]

I like talking to both men and women

[OddBeMe]

Are you at all biased when choosing friends?

[Apple1996]

Nope

[OddBeMe]

That means you’re a lesbo. Lol

[Apple1996]

I am

[OddBeMe]

Boom. I was kidding but maybe there’s truth there…

[AmeerX]

Really @Apple1996?

[sawno]

I do, very used to it online but I don't have much chances in person. I unfortunately live in a very isolated world as far as genders go. My co-workers are men, my hobbies attract men, I don't like alcohol or music so thats out of the question to.

So for me in order to meet women its either online, or something like a dating event. I wish I had a place where my type of girl was commonly found, issue is my type is in the same boat and also pretty isolated that much I discovered from experience.

[antelope51]

No, I don't like talking to women. But... I'm not attracted to them and as I'm non-binary I don't "relate" to them on a mental level very well either.

FWIW, Craig Ferguson and I tripped over each other backstage at a gig once. No sparks, lol.

[OddBeMe]

Why relating to them only a romantic thing? I’m married and relate to them.

[antelope51]

It's not though. I seriously do not understand women, and I don't like the fact that they try to push me "into line" to be more what THEY think a woman should be. I don't understand a lot of their interests, their values, their hormones, their motives... they are a vast enigma, and for 48 years have tried to tell me why there was something "wrong" with me because I just don't think the way they do. It had nothing to do with romance or attraction and everything to do with not "getting" them. It's like an alien race to me.

[OddBeMe]

For sure on that. I would say “same with the guys” but I think women can be harder on each other.

And what we’re doing backstage with Craig? Were you performing?

[antelope51]

Boston 4th of July Fireworks Spectacular at the Hatch Shell. Craig was the MC, and I was playing with one of the performance groups.

[OddBeMe]

Cool. Say anything to him?

[antelope51]

"Sorry/Excuse me?"

[OddBeMe]

So clutch.

[Kaamraj]

No, men and women generally do not have anything in common nor do they share the same life experiences. Men only talk to women most of the time because there's a sexual motive.

[OddBeMe]

Funny. I think and experience the exact opposite.

[jamesgoldman]

Only in the capacity of being their gold, they generally have lighter stuff in more abundance that they change out often

[OddBeMe]

Sorry rephrase this for me..

[jamesgoldman]

Buying not being, women change jewellery with fashion, men tend to buy big chunks and keep them for years until they stop wearing them or break them

[OddBeMe]

How does this relate to the Q?

[jamesgoldman]

I only talk to women in the pursuit of business... I have zero interest in them outside of the

[OddBeMe]

Gay?

[jamesgoldman]

Asexual

[RandomUser1000]

Sometimes I wish everyone was asexual.
I think there would be less misunderstandings that way.

[NathanDavis]

I do.

[OddBeMe]

More than guys, equal or less?

[NathanDavis]

most of my best friends are women... so, generally speaking I talk to women more than I talk to men

60/40 probably...

[OddBeMe]

Good. I wonder why more guys don’t? It helped me to date.

[NathanDavis]

maybe... the fact that I am not trying to date every woman I speak to, has helped...

for example, when I had my girlfriend in high-school... I would still talk with 4 to 6 other girls to, as friends, as classmates... as neighbors, and it was just socializing and getting along with other people in my circles, in this case women

then I had my girlfriend in college... I would still talk and sometimes hang out with... maybe 6 to 10 other girls no problem, again... just friends, classmates, acquaintances, coworkers... and I wasn't there trying to "get them to date" or anything like that, lol

and same and so on, till today... with men, and women

[OddBeMe]

Same! Even not having a girlfriend in high school…whew, still stings…the friends were always there. Had a blast at prom going with a huge group. Most without an official date.

[mandyfire98]

This is called GDE for sure.

[NathanDavis]

@mandyfire98 haha... I call it BMS, just being my self...

[LiamJHayden]

I like talking with almost anyone.

[Sevenpointfive]

no i

[AmeerX]

Not much

[OddBeMe]

Why?

[AmeerX]

For starters, most women are just crazy and paranoid. It's hard to keep friendship with them. The good ones are hard to find. And if you give them too much attention they think I am flirting and stuff. Especially younger girls tend to be so full of themselves 😂

[OddBeMe]

I mean I don’t find that to be the case. Could it be you?