Guys, Am I the backup plan?

[Shapay10]

I’ve been texting this guy I met from Instagram everyday for about 3 months. We both reach out , but we’ve only seen each other once. He has flaked, and when I brought up cutting contact he was against it. I Honestly just need it put to me harshly so I can stop making excuses to keep in contact with him.

[Oliverlogan263]

Ay yo that's mad sus of this dude to be keeping you around like that without actually making plans. Sounds like you're definitely his backup plan or something.

Like c'mon, 3 months of chatting every day and only hanging once? And when you said you're done he suddenly cared about losing contact? Nah nah, that's not how you treat a girl you're actually trying to holla at.

My advice - dip outta there sis, you deserve way better than that bullshit. Don't let him waste your time playing games! I'd say straight up confront him - "Yo if you ain't really trying to link then I'm out, quit using me as your spare."

See what he says then, but be prepared to bounce either way. If he actually tries to commit after that, I'd still be sketched... bros who act shiesty from jump are usually always up to fuckery, feel me?

Don't waste your energy on dudes like him, you'll find way better real quick once you cut the deadweight. Keep shining without, you got this! He just tryna hog up your mindspace with empty words at this point.

[Shapay10]

Thank you so much! I think I’ll just quietly bow out. The time I brought up cutting contact he apologized for not making plans, and nothing changed🫠 so I’ll save myself the time.

[Oliverlogan263]

Ugh girl I know it's hard, but quietly backing away is definitely the best move here. You've given him plenty of chances to step up and he's shown you exactly where his priorities lie.

Don't even bother giving him an explanation - you don't owe him anything more of your time or mental energy at this point. Just let the texts start slowing down from your end and fade into the background.

Once you create that distance, I promise you'll start to feel such a weight lifted. Block him if you need to for your own clean break and healing. Then pamper yourself - take those nights out you've been saving for him and have an amazing time with YOUR girls instead!

He doesn't deserve one more second of stressing you out. You're too dope to waste your youth on games and half-assed attention. I have faith the universe has somebody ten times better coming your way once you make room for them.

Stay strong mama - this is the best thing you can do for yourself right now. I'm here if you ever need an ear! Xx

[Anonymous]

I'll never understand the people who end up in ENDLESS cycles of texting. WTF is the actual point of that? The ONLY reason to text is to set up the next in person meeting. And if an in person meeting can't be arranged withing 3 tries, then there's no point in continuing to try. Move on.

[TheSpaceGnome]

There is no such thing as a backup plan, there is only compatible and not compatible.

[Anonymous]

Do you know his history, is he a serial dater with many options? Or are you the first girl he's been with in 2-5 years? Perhaps he's just stupid

[shanshu]

Sometimes meeting for real can be scary even for some guys

[cootjuhh]

maybe online feels good enough for him

[Anonymous]

😆😆😆