The age old debate.
1.9K opinions shared on Dating topic. The bill should be small enough that it's irrelevant. Men who take a woman they don't even know to an expensive dinner and often other entertainment on the first couple of dates are idiots in my opinion. Save that for when you are in a relationship, because otherwise you are just making women (who are strangers to you) feel entitled to use you.
I don't care if you bring home $1M a month, that's still not smart, and only attracts the wrong kind of woman and makes more of them.
Early dates are mostly for vetting each other, to see if you want to invest in them further. Get some ice cream or something, sure, but keep the costs down to the point where it doesn't matter. Focus on the other person, and not on using your money to try to impress them.31 Reply
Most Helpful Opinions
- 20 d
First date is always split. That way if it is bad, either can just pay for their own and leave on a less sour note. The option is there for the man or woman to pay for the others meal/drink if they wish, and the gesture means more.
With any date, regardless of how many, both should come with the same intent that they will pay for their own meal.
Here is a good dating habit. When it comes to the second date offer to pay for each others meals. The woman shows her financial stability, as does the man shows his.
It's 2024, everyone is struggling, and the economy is going to the toilet. The old 1950s style dating doesn't work in this day & age, as well as social structure.
We need new dating habits & traditions00 Reply
- 19 d
I do think the guy should pay for the first date but i don't think he should stress that it has to be at a nice restaurant. It all depends on his budget i wouldn't want someone to loan money just to impress me on the first date at a nice place. When i get asked out on a date i always allow him to choose and wouldn't be mad even if it's on a bench in the park sipping milkshakes from mcdonalds. If they insist that i choose i usually go for a nice and cozy cafe with acceptable prices, and always always offer to pay the bill or at least split it but it has never been the case.
10 Reply
- Anonymous(25-29)19 d
I never understood how this was a debate. I was like 20 when i first heard that men are expected to pay. I remember stressing about dates so hard cuz i was broke and had to make excuses why we couldnt go to xyz. Had I known the guy was gonna pay my part I would have relaxed. I just assumed we each paid our way… i dont see how i would have thought otherwise
01 Reply- 15 d
I think most men don't expect you to spend a ton of money in a date and will take it very kindly if you try to give something in return; even something very small (like a candy or something). But any self respecting man will walk away if you leave all the work up to him all the time. Lack of money will mostly not be the problem, it's lack of trying.
What Girls & Guys Said
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26Opinion
681 opinions shared on Dating topic. Society is so backwards, the woman should pay the bill, I'm in my soft guy era. Drizzle Drizzle.
If I met them online I'm going somewhere that costs 10 dollars or less, and if they try to run it up, they can pay. If it's from a cold approach I'll buy some food at a diner if things are going well, especially if it's day game and around lunch.00 ReplyWait... Why is there no option for "the woman should pay"? Hahaha.
I have never gone on a date with a woman that doesn't offer to split the bill.
Honestly, I don't mind paying, I'm in the top 1% earners. It's not the amount of money, but I do think that it's a considerate and a nice gesture when she wants to split the bill or contribute to the experience somehow (and I don't mean simply snowing up and looking pretty). It has never been the case for me, but if a woman always expected me to put all of the work in the relationship, I would walk away very quickly.
00 Reply- 20 d
Who is dating who? on a stereotypical level, a trad guy will please a trad girl when paying. A prog girl will be pleased to split with the prog guy.
Although, the reality as I lived it, is much less stereotypical than that. The best ideal possible situation I would see are that girl and that guy genuinely laughing, at the triviality AND the importance, of this payment issue during a date [:
00 Reply - 20 d
Solution: Discuss the bill upfront once a date is planned out, you should negotiate ‘you pay for your meal’ & ‘I’ll pay for my meal’ OR could say you’ll handle the bill OR suggest you split it.
If it were me, I’m going with the first option since I’d eat a small meal because I’m more focused on getting to know her personality / character / priorities / focused on the conversation aspect.03 Reply- 19 d
But it also depends on the age. Teenagers and students offer upfront to split ofc because they don't make that much money, but if i'm going out with a man who works and has his shit together i expect him to pay and appreciate it.
- 19 d
@Sunnysunny123 I would think teenagers and students would pay for their own meal instead of split since it would be paying more…. When you have less money to go around for one.
For two, if a guy has 2-3 dates in the week that amount of money adds up especially if it is an unsuccessful date… It really depends on 1) His income 2) Restaurant and 3) How many dates in his book. That is a lot of money to consider here. - 19 d
Yes pay for themselves you are right i didn't consider that someone may want to order more stuff.
Yes but just coffee is not expensive also if a man can't find someone decent in 20 different dates then he needs to consider looking somewhere else 😂
It depends on who’s dating who. My first dates are usually drinks at the pub and I’ll pay for the first round. If she offers to pay for the second round I know she’s a decent woman and I’ll offer to take her for dinner afterwards and I’ll pay. If she downs shots and expects more I’ll make my excuses and say my goodbyes
10 Reply- 19 d
if your friends, you should go dutch, but if you're in a relationship, the man should pay it, simplifies it and makes more sense. some women might agree with this
22 Reply- 19 d
@cheapshotbobI am probably old fashioned, but I would expect it.
- 19 d
how does the man paying simply it?
777 opinions shared on Dating topic. Girls are you crazy, the guy should pay. At least if he asked you for a date.
61 Reply- 19 d
id feel bad if someone paid for me
- 19 d
Since women rarely ask guys out on first dates and it is usually a guy asking a girl out he should probably pay. You asked her, she didn't ask you.
00 Reply - 19 d
Split.. but if I am super willing to split I have no interest in seeing you again. If I let a guy pay its cuz I want to see him again.
04 Reply- 19 d
@77five If I don't want to see the guy again I split so I'm not using him. The guy I like I want him to pay because it shows he likes and values me. Plus it makes me feel safe moving forward with him. I am also not into this soft guy stuff, so if he isn't willing to pay I already know how he is and I have no interest in moving forward with a man so pathetic.
- 19 d
- 20 d
Guy should pay unless it gets into a pissing contest then split it. If you girls are using this contest as a "test" DONT. YOU LOSE EVERY TIME
20 Reply 12.1K opinions shared on Dating topic. The one asking for the date should at least offer to pay.
21 Reply- 19 d
Yes @Nikki1989
1.7K opinions shared on Dating topic. If a guy didn't pay for me I wouldn't be seeing him again
00 Reply- 19 d
Split. I can pay for my own food. Unless you insist, and I will appreciate it, but it won't impress me.
00 Reply 489 opinions shared on Dating topic. If he invites her out and chooses the venue, he pays. If not, split it.
00 Reply3.9K opinions shared on Dating topic. The waiter should since you two are so special.
10 Reply444 opinions shared on Dating topic. The form of this question twice today. If you don't care to pay don't ask her out. Whomever asks the other out pays. It's a date.
10 Reply- 19 d
Who cares. If it went good n u like her pay. If u dont like her but maintain good character pay and move on. If y'all just out and not on a date then anyone can throw in
00 Reply - 19 d
Women are becoming increasingly independent. The guy paying would be very polite, but I see nothing wrong with wanting to split it.
00 Reply 3.1K opinions shared on Dating topic. Split the bill to screen out the gold diggers 😎
01 Reply- Anonymous(45 Plus)20 d
To me this isn't a debate. I'm going to pay. But if other guys or girls want to split it that's up to them. I'm not telling other people how to live their life.
00 Reply - 19 d
First dates should be cheap like coffee or a home cooked meal
00 Reply - Anonymous(36-45)19 d
It it is a date the guy should pay. If it is in friendship then any possibility is open
11 Reply- 19 d
why should the guy pay?
The one that asks, pays.
20 Reply- 20 d
Definitely split the bill.
20 Reply whatever feels right on the date
00 Reply- 19 d
Split the bill 💵😋😈
00 Reply - 15 d
Guys take care of women. Set the tone.
00 Reply 324 opinions shared on Dating topic. The gal should pay.
00 Reply- 20 d
The asker should at least offer.
00 Reply - 19 d
The one who asked for it should pay
00 Reply - 20 d
Caring is sharing. Split the bill
10 Reply - 20 d
Split the bill.
20 Reply 2.5K opinions shared on Dating topic. IM OKAY WITH PAYING
00 Reply- 19 d
I think the asker pays.
00 Reply Go Dutch
20 Reply- 20 d
Guy should pay
10 Reply
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