My girlfriend doesn’t want me watching shows with low/mild nudity. Ex. "The Boys" (weird but I like the comics) or "Invincible." What should I do?

[RyRedline]

[Tamera952]

This is where you should practice standing up for yourself. This is where you should recognize that this isn’t about imaginary chicks that you might be ‘viewing’ and that this is fundamentally about CONTROL. If you concede to her unhealthy demands, you are tacitly training her that this behavior is ok, and it’s not.

You should tell her that it’s too bad that she feels that way, and tell her that she doesn’t get to dictate what you watch or why. Her roll is not to police what you choose to watch, and not to interject herself where she has no business. You’ll have to reassure her that you guys are good (hopefully that’s true) …but it’s very important you shut this down as soon as possible, with a hard no. Tell her she’s being unreasonable.

She unfortunately is one of those possessive ‘girls’ who gets jealous about fictional Tik-tok girls, or comics, or cartoons, or girls in porn, etc. etc. —She doesn’t understand that this is not about her, and that just because you are watching naked or semi-naked chicks, that it is no reflection on her or how you feel about her. You watching whatever you want, doesn’t detract from her. It’s not a binary choice between that and her. That’s crazy!!

Guys are biologically hardwired for visual stimulus as well. Girls, especially young girls, don’t really get this. You should educate her that this is behavior that you don’t appreciate, and if you don’t set her straight now, you’re setting up a toxic dynamic whereas you will end up resenting her, doing it despite her wishes, hiding it from her, lying to her, and her manipulation will tend to escalate.

[HawkPerception]

Well said. There's nothing for me to add here.

[DishLady]

You’re 19 with the whole world ahead of you… what’s your priority? The gal or the TV. Think of it that way and your answer will smack you in the face.


Having said that, 90% of programming for your demographic has “mild nudity” and language. So what’re you gonna do? I guess just don’t KNOWINGLY watch something like that. At the same time, if you’ve watched the whole series and are just continuing the series she should get a clue… and you should find the “fast forward” button. (A fair compromise to just not watching the program at all OR pissing the gal off.)

[worldscolide]

Find a new girlfriend.

I dated someone like her once, she was so utterly controlling that I wasn't permitted to have contact with the opposite sex, even if they were family. I was required to look at her during nude scenes in movies and shows, and she inspected my browser history daily. Eventually she got physically abusive. I broke up with her and she chose to slice my face up.

What she's doing is a form of abuse. It will get worse. There is no way to deal with this beyond leaving.

[AviatorTom]

I'm not sure the saying still exists, but we had a saying when I was young...

"Tough titty said the kitty."

Tell her that, and that she can not want you watching those shows but that you will watch whatever you want to watch, and she can watch whatever she wants to watch.

If she doesn't accept that, as they say, there are other fish in the sea.

[Summeroflove]

She cannot control you. She can choose to not be with you if you aren’t what she wants…. But she can’t stop you. You need a compatibility talk… maybe you can work things out. Maybe it’s best you respectfully go your separate ways.

[Chazmatazz269]

Bail out! Controlling never goes away. It always escalates to abuse, and sometimes worse.

[Finchie40]

You need to dump her, that’s controlling and insecure

[Bitter_Sweet94]

Talk to her, but don’t just agree out of pressure.

A partner can have boundaries, but they shouldn’t control your harmless hobbies.

Low level nudity in a show isn’t the same as disrespecting your relationship.

Ask her what exactly bothers her insecurity? past experiences? fear of comparison? And then reassure her, but stay firm on your autonomy.

A healthy relationship doesn’t shrink you to fit someone’s comfort zone.

It teaches both people to manage their insecurities without limiting each other.

[egan3141]

This is the best answer. The other answers related to "just dump her", "do what you want" and "just stop watching" are ridiculous and a major problem in society right now. Just because someone makes a statement doesn't mean everything is said and done. People need COMMUNICATION. You do need to respect your own desires, but you should also communicate with her and understand why she wants you to stop (or any other thing she requests of you).

[Bitter_Sweet94]

Exactly, relationships survive on communication, not ultimatums.

People forget you can set boundaries and still listen to your partner.

It’s not about choosing sides, it’s about choosing maturity.

[SueShe]

Why would you want to look at nude people in the first place? There is absolutely no need to watch nudity.

Those wanting to watch shows with nudity, whether mild nudity are simply put voyeurs and nothing more. That is not appropriate in a relationship. There are plenty of shows available that have no nudity and where actors/actresses are decently clothed. I fail to see what is attracting you to those shows if not voyeurism.

This is simply not tolerable in a relationship and I do agree with your girlfriend that finds that, since you are in a relationship with her, you should avoid nudity/pornographic content. Otherwise, simply break up with her but if you want to remain with her, accept the fact that she finds it offensive to watch pornography/nudity.

[Tamera952]

Wrong, wrong, more wrong. This ^opinion^ above is just as misinformed as your girlfriend. She makes absurd claims. “Why would you want to look at nudity” …. really? Get a clue why don’t ya?

[RyRedline]

I’m not watching the show for the nudity. I’m watching the show because I enjoy the actually plot of the show. I’m not some simpleminded Goy that wants to watch that show to see nudity and I’m not actually seeking out that kind of context these are shows I watch before I go with her and even then I don’t care for the nudity in them. I wish it didn’t have nudity in it but I’m not watching it for nudity

[Tamera952]

It doesn’t matter why you’re watching it, nudity or not, and you don’t owe anyone an explanation. You have every right to watch whatever you want. @SueShe is making this about nudity when it’s not. She missed the point entirely, and is agreeing with your GF’s toxic behavior, and missed the point that it’s about her trying to control you, not about the content of whatever media you may be watching.

[worldscolide]

Normally you have good responses, but this one is just moronic. Just because a show has nudity doesn't mean it's bad. Thank God your puritanical idiotic views aren't shared by rational thinking people. @Tamera952 is correct.

[HawkPerception]

SueShe is a misandrist. Do not listen to this nonsense.

[worldscolide]

It explains why she's not a mod anymore

[SueShe]

@HawkPerception yawn!

[bddddd]

Watch shows with high-level nudity. Problem solved!!!

Seriously, though. Your girlfriend is insecure. Rather than address her insecurities though therapy, self-love, exercise, developing hobbies and achievements, success in her career and at school... anything at all that would give her reason to feel more adequate... she has decided that the cheapest way for her to feel good is to manipulate and control you.

If you choose to stay, an enable her pathology, then it's 99% likely going to get a lot worse over time.

[KBird]

Tell her you're not watching it for the nudity... if you're watching it for the comics and it makes you happy, then continue watching it. You have every right to watch what you want. That is controlling behavior.

Also, just tell her that if it bothers her, she doesn't have to watch it with you.

[Zionne]

That’s usually a sign of insecurity or control, not actual “protecting the relationship.” The healthy move is to talk to her calmly, set a boundary, and let her know you’re allowed to enjoy normal media without policing. And if you want help communicating that without blowing things up, a dating coach for men can guide you so you stay firm and respectful.

[OneViewpoint]

Let your girlfriend know she doesn't control you. Either set reasonable boundaries now or she'll lose all respect for you going forward and your life will be miserable. Your choice.

[dragoblack]

She's projecting her insecurities. Help her realize that insecurity, ask her to show you some trust. Having her show trust will help her get past her insecurity. If she can't trust and emotionally mature, the relationship won't stay stable. Projecting Insecurities always destabilizes a relationship

[Abbycado]

With movies having nudity these days, I don't know how she is avoiding it completely. She sounds very controlling.

[Abbycado]

You need to tell her that.

[RyRedline]

She doesn’t like my friends either and recently I hung out with my lifelong best friend and we ended up having one drink the night before Thanksgiving and she flipped out on me the next day.

[Abbycado]

Then she shouldn't be your girlfriend. She is toxic.

[RyRedline]

I tried to tell her that and she goes “I don’t think you deserve to be trusted with that stuff” because I told her “you telling me what to watch is controlling and seems like you don’t trust me”

[Abbycado]

Not sure what else to tell you. She is toxic and controlling. Leave her or put up with it. Those are the choices.

[SueShe]

@Abbycado The G AFOB question was removed as the asker did not expect that you cam up with the right answer. She was displeased and my reply to your answer was

"I was mistrusting your information but upon checking the web, I must admit that you are right. Kudos for finding what I could not 🤔"

Darn, I lost so many points now!

[Abbycado]

@SueShe I just messaged you about this. I was so disappointed. ☹️

[SueShe]

S**t happens and so short before Christmas 🤷‍♀️

[Tamera952]

@Abbycado IS 100% RIGHT! She called it just like I did. Absolutely SPOT ON

[Abbycado]

@Tamera952 ty 💕

[snermcger]

Just start calling her 'mommie'.
Not mother, not mom... Mommie.
Like this.
"When I knock you up, what comes out of you after nine months, that, you can tell what to watch. Mommie"

[jshm2]

She's only your girlfriend, sunny. Not your wife or mother.

Tell that moist bint to stop being so insecure, and grow up.

[exitseven]

You have 3 choices, You don;t watch it, you watch it anyway but do not tell her or you can man up and tell her the she's not the boss of you.

[NoDecision]

Get the "edited for nudity" copies on DVD and watch them instead.

[WonderingManII]

She doesn't sound reasonable. Because most shows have got some of that in them.

[DextroShade]

Tell her she's not your mom and you will watch whatever you want. If she can't handle that it is better for you to get rid of her sooner rather than later.

[RavVid]

Easy. Do it surreptitiously and enjoy the nefarious vibe you get from that.

[MannMitAntworten]

Agree if she deletes all her social media and ceases keeping men best friends. Good trade. No boobs for you and no outside validation for her.

[Anonymous]

Listen to your girlfriend, you're lucky to have one.

[RyRedline]

you’re the reason there is a chair the corner of hotel rooms

[Opinion Owner]

What do you mean by that?

[RedInnocent69]

Tell her to lighten up, or watch something with her that she finds hot

[beefcakebradybatson]

Talk to her about your typically boyish affinity for low-grade nudity.

[SueShe]

@beefcakebradybatson Oh boy, you are in for serious trouble by @Tamera952 if you take the girlfriend's defense. She will not like it a bit because, let's face it that lady will jump at your throat for your opinion.

[beefcakebradybatson]

@SueShe Is she a, big broad?

[SueShe]

No idea how big she is but she definitely has a big mouth.

[Tamera952]

@SueShe facts. I do.

[melssvdv]

@SueShe @beefcakebradybatson Just give her a good punch on @Tamera952 's face. So she will understand not to hit a man (stronger sex)

[beefcakebradybatson]

@SueShe Not as big as mine, and I'm much more articulate.

[Anonymous]

She's your girlfriend, not your mother. She can't forbid you from watching a movie or show because of nudity.

[Drumlin2001]

Sounds rather controlling. Ditch her

[dudeinohio]

Watch whatever you want. You are an adult.

[slatyb]

Dump her and date an adult.

[AngryCarl2]

Tell her to suck a large one.

[chickychickyparmparm]

Tell her to get over it.

[ABC1x1x]

There's nudity in "The Boys"?

[guesswhereivebeen]

Tell her she can’t watch it either

[Jmmmfi4]

Tell her to kick rocks

[sirderpsalot123]

Dump her

[Filthy_Immigrant]

dump her ass