Why won’t men marry you if you don’t want kids if you as the woman has to do more of the care giving?

[Anonymous]

[BCRanger10]

Because that has traditionally been the role of a woman in the home and in the family. The man has worked to feed, clothe, and house the family and is typically larger and physically stronger, so he also shoulders the protective element. It's what he is naturally better suited and more inclined for. It's his responsibility in the family. That's what he "brings to the table", as the saying goes.

The woman, on the other hand, is the "soft and sweet" to the man's "strong and steady". She is more naturally suited for caretaking and homemaking. And yes, that is the woman's responsibility in the family. She's a softer, more welcoming, and less intimidating presence than the man. She is also more in touch with her emotions than a man is. So again, she is a better fit to take on the caretaking role.

So if a woman does not want this future with a man but he does, he's going to think "okay, why bother with her then?" It's not unreasonable, it's not chauvinism, it's not misogyny, or anything like that. They just want different things.

[Zack-Bann]

The question is why do women consider that a man has no opinion on his children because he has to do less of the care giving
(Which is 100% false by the way)


Yes only women can get pregnant and breastfeed
But a man can do quite literally everything else


And all of this doesn’t matter
What matters is: some people want kids and others don’t
You can’t force a man or a woman to have kids anymore than force a man or a woman to give up on their aspiration for being parents


The amount of work involved is irrelevant

[HollyK21]

So you don’t want kids because you feel as though you’d do majority of the parenting and not because of personal, moral beliefs? That’s just silly. What you do is marry a who’s interested in being a parent, then you don’t have to worry about him not being an active father. A guy who really wants to be a dad should not rob himself of that milestone, same goes for a woman who’s with a man that doesn’t want kids.

[Asker]

People don’t know how to act right I’m talking about adults to want to start over again.

[HollyK21]

That’s a broad generalization. Are there “people who don’t know how to act right”? Absofuckinglutely, there’s plenty of deadbeats out there. But to attach that label to someone not because of something they’ve done but because you’ve seen it happen before is just ridiculous. That’s like a guy saying he won’t commit to you because “women are sluts”. You did nothing to earn that labeling, so does it sound fair at all to put that on you?

[Asker]

I never said that all men are deadbeats I’m saying on the norm women are the main caregivers. Women are more expected to be involved with a child when it comes to stuff.

[HollyK21]

Obviously men can’t breastfeed but aside from that he should be doing his part when it comes to parenting. If a woman marries someone who’s lazy and inactive then he was most likely being a lackluster partner from the start and that’s who she chose anyway. You can save yourself all the stress by asking the right questions and having good judgement when it comes to who you choose to be the father of your baby.

[Asker]

Do you have kids?

[HollyK21]

Nope, but why would that matter?

[Asker]

Because I was going to ask you who got up more to feed the baby late at night?

[HollyK21]

I dont have kids but I’ve at least gotten to see first hand how my uncle’s behaved as parents, one of them is even the father of twins. They supported my aunts through pregnancy and after, but that’s because they’re good men. Meanwhile I have a cousin who sucked as a parent. 3 boys and his wife did majority of the work. But like I said before, it’s about who you choose to be a father and the signs are usually there beforehand. Like with this cousin he was always lazy and didn’t want to be a dad in the first place, she basically trapped him with kid after kid and she’s not a very good mom in my opinion. She always prioritizes him over the kids and their relationship was toxic from the start.

[Asker]

Children are for people who have the patience for it. High and likely it’s the woman is going t o be the main parent. That’s not being a negative Nancy that’s reality.

[HollyK21]

Well Jan, everyone is different. I never said you were being negative, I said you were making a broad generalization. You asked why men won’t marry a woman who doesn’t want kids, and it sounds like you don’t want them because you believe you’d do majority of the parenting. In my opinion that’ll only happen if you choose a shitty guy and/or one who doesn’t care to be a dad.

[Asker]

They can be a dad but the women still normally the main source people come to over a child.

[Asker]

Majority of people even in people who work in schools and hospitals are going to call you first as the mom when their is a problem with your child, society makes it the norm to depend on a woman when it comes to a child.

[HollyK21]

I have a question for you. Why ask about this topic if you feel like you already have the answers and weren’t going to be open minded, just completely biased? I’ve had no problem agreeing that yes, deadbeat and inactive fathers exist. So is it really this hard for you to meet me halfway and even consider that what it comes down to is who a woman picks as their baby’s dad? Why is it so difficult to understand that you can be in a relationship where a man does equal work without putting all that responsibility into his partner?

Like I said, men can’t breastfeed, but if the mom’s pumping then why do you not think he can get up in the middle of the night to feed them? Or be up early in the morning with them so mom can rest? Like it genuinely sounds as if you grew up with horrible examples of what a man should be doing not only in a relationship but as a father.

[Asker]

I just said that schools and hospitals recommend the mom as the source of care to the mom. People in general are going to look at you when it comes to a child. I live in reality not in a world that think is going to be fair to women.

[HollyK21]

You live in a world of utter bias. Please link whatever source you’re getting this from so I can read it myself.

[Asker]

I live in reality and not delusion unlike you most teachers and doctors is going to want the mom before they would contact the dad.

[HollyK21]

And please don’t go googling some random thing that you believe fits your narrative the best. I want the exact source you got these percentages and feedback from. Not even being confrontational I just want to read it myself.

[HollyK21]

Great, show me that source. Thanks.

[Asker]

Especially talking to someone who doesn’t have any kids go ask the woman who you know who is more involved in the child’s school meetings and taking the child to doctor appointments.

[HollyK21]

So you don’t have a source, just “trust me bro” and feelings.

[Asker]

I know more than you by seeing other people than what you know like you don’t pay that close attention to anything. Don’t need any source to show you when it’s common sense you’re just a dimwit.

[HollyK21]

Yes you do need a source when you’re talking about factual percentages and stats. Since the name calling has started you are clearly in your feelings so let’s just end the conversation. It’s really immature and ignorant on your behalf. Can’t even have a normal conversation about the topic YOU chose and upset that I’m asking for facts to back up your claims lol grow up.

[Asker]

Why don’t you look it up I bet you the percentage is higher on women than it is on men.

[Asker]

Here crybaby the internet tells you without an question the woman is hugely more likely to get custody over children.

[Asker]

https://ibb.co/xSnMDdy0

[HollyK21]

I wanted the source for what YOU looked up and read to be making such broad generalizations and passing them off as fact. But since you’ve degenerated into insults and name calling just because you didn’t like that I ask for a source, then you are not mature enough to have this conversation with me. Therefore it’s over.

[Asker]

Just searched it up bitch google it and it tells you in the main page.

[HighValue]

Many women, especially stay at home mothers are lazy and do MUCH less work than the man that works full time and supports the family. Anyone that claims they do equal work when staying at home taking care of kids and the house are liars that believed the same feminist lies that has been ruining women for generations.

And whether you want kids or not, why should a man marry a woman? To let her ruin him financially and steal his kids whenever she feels like it? ALL women that want marriage are thieves until they get the laws changed that allow them to abuse and steal from men. Marriage is only for abusive thieves.

[Anonymous]

Because believe it or not most men want kids. That’s a sad thing to say not wanting kids because the female thinks she’s going to have to do more of the care giving. W that attitude it’s best the female doesn’t have kids because she sees it as more of a chore then the love of her children, her family. If that’s the case she shouldn’t be a mother. Honestly children aren’t that hard to raise.

[Berethor]

Not needing to do the care giving make is easier for a man to want kids, why would a man marry an unfeminine and immature woman who don't want kids, what's the point?

[Asker]

Fuck you how are you immature for not wanting kids? I see a lot of immature people who do have kids and plus that tells me a lot that you don’t mind having children if you aren’t the one taking a lot of the responsibility. Like that’s like a job that pays you for doing nothing. You wouldn’t work the job if they actually made you do the work.

[Berethor]

A woman should have a maternal instinct, it makes women better at care giving.

[Asker]

So I’m immune because I don’t want to be worried with brats no thanks sounds like a setup to me. Can’t make me something I don’t want to do.

[Asker]

You don’t do everything a woman says for you to do it’s ridiculous.

[Berethor]

Why should I do everything a woman says to me? I man should be dominant.

[Asker]

That’s your problem you’re too much of a dictator Adolf Hitler number 2.

[Berethor]

And you hot-headed, the Godwin's Law says that you lost that argument, a bad play.

https://allthetropes.org/wiki/Godwin%27s_Law

[Asker]

I’m not clicking on that bullshit.

[Anonymous]

For the same reason women won't marry you if she makes more than you.

Both genders have their roles. Your gender's role is to give birth. You don't want to do that, fine. But "NO RING FOR YOU"!😆

https://www.youtube.com/embed/KAmaJkME2m4

[slatyb]

Why is not important. There are plenty of men who also don't want children. If you aren't meeting any, expand your dating circle.

[Anonymous]

If they want kids, they should be with someone that does.

[Zionne]

bec they don't have brains

[Asker]

Why you say that

[MasterKS]

sticking with one person is not so easy.