New boyfriend doesn't contact me every day. Is this a sign he's not that into me?

[we3girls]

my boyfriend and I have been dating exclusively for 2 months and we live an hour apart. We usually see each other on the weekend and occassionally once through the week. He is very sweet to me and I think things are going well, but then I don't hear from him for a couple days. There has been times I've texted first, but if I don't it will sometimes take 2-3 days for him to text or call. I met his family and friends and they all say he seems so happy with me. If so happy, why does he wait so long to communicate with me? Am I missing something?

[Spirit156]

No its fine

Hes busy in his life and he's happy to be with you

Look.. I know kinda how you feel since he doesn't give you a lot of attention but he just isn't used to messaging people each day even not the one he loves but that is because he fully trusts you and isn't a clingy person

You should be glad to be with him.. Why? Well your not around each day, guys don't always think of their girlfriend each day (definitly not long distance) and we guys look forward of being with you instead of throwing messages your way

You know, if he really loves you he should be trying to find a way to lose the long distance between the two of you in some way, if that is not thr case ignore this answer

I had 2 long distance relationships.. One was 2 years and the other 3 months.. And the girl I had for 3 months did one thing and that was showing me that she was too needy for attention over the phone while I wanted her to live in with me and to see her everyday.. She got her attention elsewhere and I broke up with her

[we3girls]

I'm feeling so much better. We have only been together 2 months. The love word hasn't popped up yet, but he shows it when he's with me and his family can see it in him. I am not needy for his constant attention. I'm glad this is healthy. It's just not what I'm used to, so I thought I'd get some opinions.

[we3girls]

I don't want to appear too clingly especially at our age, but being an hour apart I look forward to hearing from him. We have only been together 2 months, so it might be a bit too soon to lose the distance between us. He moved because of his job. The love word hasn't come up yet either, but his family says nothing but positive things to me on how they see he is being with me.

[Spirit156]

Well his family knows him better then we do and there is nothing wrong with saying honey, I like to hear from you when I get home so I can get used to it before/because etc.

[Jinmetsu_Rasetsu]

If women and men act the same way, it is the beginning of the end. My ex started acting as such just before we split. I understand your situation. I am 34, and went from 2003 until 2011 without dating, so I know what it is like to be years out of dating.

Not trying to be the bringer of bad news and pessimism, however, he may not be that much in to you, and are trying to figure a way to let you go.

[we3girls]

He has been like this from the start. I just thought as we got closer, he would want to talk more. I just spent the weekend with him and went to a weeding he invited me to where I met his whole family. Everything seemed great. I talked to him Sunday night...and here it is Tuesday evening and still not a word.

[Jinmetsu_Rasetsu]

Forgive my cynicism, but I have become cynical over the years... He may not be as into you as you are him. Otherwise, he would talk to you. Either that or he is employing the asinine movie based, "3 day rule". Personally, I think you are wasting your time with him. If he don't have the common decency to call... Have you attempted to call him?

[we3girls]

What is 3-day rule? I'm not familiar with that. When we are together, he tells me how happy he is and he isn't going anywhere. I do initiate contact sometimes, and it always goes well. We get a long great and he says that our relationship just flows, like it should. I just don't get why he goes so long to contact me.

[Jinmetsu_Rasetsu]

Well, the three day rule is just a stupid idea that it takes 3 days for whatever to cool down before you should speak to the woman again... It is stupid, really...

Me and my ex got along better than my last girlfriend (being that I did not date anyone for 8 years after). And she totally flaked on me in January. Just saying, don't keep your hopes up...

[Jinmetsu_Rasetsu]

I am wondering, What has happened with this situation?

[Spr167]

So how is your new relationship going?

[rdabby]

My long distance boyfriend is the same when we first start talking he used to text me 20 texts a day, then they became 10 and less and less as months go by... I thought he didn't like me as much or starting to get bored I used to make a lot of drama and argue about why things changed etc... But then I realized, we re not in the getting to know each other phaze and now we re just comfortable with each other and sometimes now I don't text him a lot on a day so he could miss me or it just happens and he goes like where have you been...

Dont over stress and over think about those little things believe me its a headache.. If you feel like its getting too much and you feel something could be wrong you could just wait untill you guys see each other and ask him how come he sometimes disappears for few days and make it sound casual...

[we3girls]

We ARE in the get to know each other stage. Only been 2 months. He has been like this from the start. I jus tthought as we got closer...he would want to talk more. I don't want to seem clingy, so I refrain from saying anything.

[rdabby]

You met his parents and he met yours and you see each other every weekend and etc.. Seems to me he is pretty nice and sweet to you and he just needs a little space.. If it gets worse talk to him about it.. am not saying dont..

[kirstentaylorc]

It could just be that he has things going on, I typically talked to my boyfriend at least once a day but I know some couples who go a day or 2 without communicating. If you're not comfortable with it, just ask him.

[Anonymous]

i wouldn't love it but if you trust him don't worry so much..maybe talk to him. the fact that they met you is the biggest sign that he does care. guys are not as communicative, especially if they are busy.

[jennifer_bloom]

I think it’s okay for a guy to skip conversation days if he makes his interest in you clear and gives you acceptable reasons for not talking and letting you know he is busy so you will not doubt his loyalty to you. I always tell my friends when my phone is in airplane mode so they will not think I rejected their friendship if I ignore them when they text me.

[TheUglyOne]

Are you really over 35 lol? You sound like a teen. People our age know that boyfriends/girlfriends don't always communicate on a daily basis. In fact I've known women and even some men who broke up because their partner was daily calling them, thought it was too clingy.

So, no, it isn't a sign he is not into you. It's a sign he is a mature adult who knows to give his girlfriend enough space and a life of her own.

[we3girls]

Ok, even though you ripped on me, I like your answer. I was married for 18 years, so unfortunately I really am not too experienced with dating as a mature adult. :) My last boyfriend texted me all day long, so this is quite different. Just wanted to make sure.

[TheUglyOne]

OK now that I know your background, please accept an apology from an ass.

That is more understandable, entering the world of dating after being in a commited relationship for so long.

But yes, as teens, we like to call or talk every day. But when people, both men and women get older, we settle into our careers, hobbies, and give more space, so to speak, to our partners.

[we3girls]

Oh,It's OK. I was expecting it. Not only was I married for a long time, but was a stay-at-home mom. So this is all so new to me. It's good to know how he is behaving with me is healthy and not a bad sign.

[TheUglyOne]

From what you wrote, sounds like you have a healthy and good relationship.

Eventually if the relationship grows, you'll both want to see more of each other, but right now, at two months, that seems the right amount of time. :)

[ashtonm]

Amen to that.

[we3girls]

This is relieving to know. thank you

[martyfellow]

He's just busy with his life; be glad he isn't clingy and always stalking you. You can also live your own life without him looking over your shoulder all the time.

He's comfortable with the relationship and not insecure like a lot of guys in a physcially distant situation like yours.

[we3girls]

My last relationship we were in almost constant communication. I don't want to compare, but I was afraid this meant he wasn't that into me. It seems strange we get along so well. He even says our relationship flows so easy and he is happy. I just thought he would want to talk to me more.

[martyfellow]

He'll want to talk more as the relationship develops. He may want to take things slower than you would like. 2 months is not that long for most people, especially at your ages..so just relax and don't pressure him.

[we3girls]

Ok, I won't pressure. I just get a little worried when I don"t hear from him. Bad past experiences I guess. I don't want to initiate contact with him all the time, because I want to give him space and not appear clingy. I guess living an hour apart, I look forward to hearing from him.

[martyfellow]

Sounds like you're keeping things in a good perspective. Don't worry, when you don't hear from him, find people nearby to hang out with.

[kholland65]

It's a sign he's a guy...Guys don't like phones nor do we feel the need to be in contact with our SO every day. If we don't see you in person, we'll usually just refrain from any contact, because texting and phone conversations are annoying, and don't qualm our lust and longing for you. We need physical touch and closeness.

[notguilty]

But why do guys blow up your phone to win you? Why don't they start of with balance? It's the sudden change that confuses females.

[Roxxy99]

His expectations of the relationship may be different from yours. He may require more space than you do. It’s either that or he doesn’t want to appear to clingy and is holding back. In my mind, if you’re dating someone, you should be able to talk openly about your relationship and what you need out if it. Communication is key to finding common ground.

[Anonymous]

Some people just aren't clingy. He doesn't have to text you every day and say he loves you every hour to mean it. He's probably busy or doing something that doesn't give him the time to text you.

[we3girls]

Love word hasn't come up yet. It's only been 2 months. Waiting...:)

[Nikki1989]

Every day would be obsessive.