I have been working at a job for four months and I’ve had to go off work sick for stress anxiety and depression due to how my manager is treating me and the toxic culture and insidious behaviour from some of my work colleagues which has left me questioning myself and my intelligence
I am very well qualified and have a Masters degree. I have two degrees and a music degree and it’s not difficult for me to find employment. Since I joined this new job, I have experienced certain bullying behaviours from colleagues which has isolated me and has got me questioning myself and my sanity.
My manager told me at my three month meeting that I was underperforming and threatened to dismiss me at month six if I didn’t step up my performance. So I reached out for support with my learning disability to help me pass probation. Since then my manager has been passive aggressive and made out that she hates me. She told me I shouldn’t have reached out for support and what I did was wrong. When I go into the office she ignores me all day so I’m left feeling something is wrong. In all our manager meetings, she picks apart all my work and criticises everything I do. I’m damned if I do and damned if I don’t. Nothing I do is good enough
Another work colleague who is responsible for delegating me work I think she is setting me up to fail. She hands over impossible tasks to me which I haven’t been trained on and expects me to complete them whilst overloading me with work. Then when I reach out for support with the task, she ignores my messages and says she’s busy, and never has time to help me, so I end up getting in trouble with my manager.
Another work colleague absolutely LOVES fault finding all my work, nitpicking it all apart and telling me on a daily basis what I’ve done is wrong, down to tiny spelling errors. She tells me that she looks at my schedule and always sends me messages asking what sort of work I’m doing.
Am I being bullied?
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Wow, I'm really sorry to hear you're going through all that crap at work. It seriously does sound like you're being bullied - those people are totally singling you out and making your job super stressful for no good reason. It pisses me off that your manager threatened to fire you just for asking for support with your learning disability. Like what the hell? That's such bullshit discrimination. And that one coworker always giving you impossible tasks and then not helping when you need it - what a jerk, she's definitely trying to sabotage you. I can't believe with all your qualifications you're having to deal with that. Those guys just sound jealous and pathetic honestly. I wouldn't want to stick around people who make me feel crazy either. You shouldn't have to walk on eggshells and stress over your job like that every day.
I'd definitely start looking for something new ASAP, somewhere you'll be treated fairly. In the meantime though, you gotta take care of yourself too. Don't let them mess with your head - you know you're capable. Maybe take some sick days if you're feeling overwhelmed too, do what you need to take a break from the toxicity. And definitely document all the specific examples you mentioned, like unfair criticism, ignoring you, piling on work - keep dates, times, what was said, anyone who witnessed it. You might need records in case you decide to report them after leaving. Don't let them ruin your mental health or confidence. Brighter days are coming, don't take shit from those losers! You got this.
In short, you think the entire office is out to get you?
Stop and examine that perspective from the outside. It’s narcissistic to think that any one person is sacrificing their own personal productivity in order to sabotage you. To think multiple people are doing it is just bananas. Most people are simply not that important. The ones that are aren’t wasting time on social media platforms like this one. They’re too busy dodging assassination attempts. Ell oh ell!