I think it was a bit over the top considering it was her first offense and that his grandchild isn't at fault for her/his mother's narcissistic behaviour. I think he should have let her stay for the moment but warn her that if anything happens to the cat (even by "accident") he'll actually throw her out.
He is right
He is right to be upset, but that is a bit too much as a first offense
That is wrong, he shouldn't put the cat over his daughter
Other
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+1 y
So it is ok to put your child and innocent grandchild into a situation of homelessness without even checking if she is mentally ok? I mean, a pregnant woman who is single and has no place to live is certainly a vulnerable individual at a low point in life. If you, as family show no empathy then who should?
Was thid man overreacting by deciding to throw his daughter out of the house for sending his cat to the shelter?
I have seen here on GaG that some people value their pets over a human. Like if you had to save someone who didn't like dogs or your dog, which would you pick. A lot said the dog. So why can't this guy value his pet that has been with him since a baby? The daughter - she is divorcing her husband so is entitled to child support, spousal support, and half of what they have so she should be able to get her own place and not be homeless. She has no right to get rid of someone else's possessions without consulting them for their approval. He pays the rent , not his daughter, so it is his rules, not hers. If she can't deal with it then she should get her own place or live with her husband until she can afford her own place as it is his kid too. They made the baby so they should deal with it together, not have to have mom and dad deal with the fallout of bad mistakes on her part. So he needs to lay down the law about his cat and if his daughter accepts it she could stay. If not she should get out. Dad's way or the highway. And that would be her choice, he is not making her go.
She lays a hand on me again and she will draw back a bloody stump! That bitch ain't gettin' rid of me that easy.
That wasn't the point. If your family shows no empathy when you are at your lowest point in life then who will? If this isn't her regular behaviour i think it is just cruel. And who cares his daughter wanted the baby? It's his fucking child and grandchild, not a stranger. He also chose to have his daughter. And he knew his daughter since she was a baby too. I am. not saying she should be tolerated, but it's too much for her first mistake. He could pay for her rent or find another family member than ca be a host to her.
And you didn't hear what I said. She is married, she should be with her husband and he should support her. She should therefore not be homeless. I would think living with her husband would be better than living at home in this instance.
She's divorced... and as far as I know, it's not always split 50/50. Depends on the situation. Anyway, in his place, i wouldn't make my children and grandchildren homeless unless they were really shitty people and didn't deserve any of my help. But her child isn't even born, so he is as innocent as it can be and we don't know if that was her first mistake.
He did the right thing. I used to work at a cat rescue and we often got elderly cats who's owners had passed. People usually want younger cats. On top of that a lot of the time the cat is depressed, refusing to eat, refusing to interact, afraid of the new care givers, confused. What she did was really wrong. You don't just take it upon yourself to get rid of someone else's pet. If it was a dog I bet a lot of people who disagreed with his choice would feel differently.
As messed up as this sounds, he didn't lay down to make the baby, she did. She should have thought about the repercussions her actions could have. The only thing I'd say this man did wrong is not throw his wife out as well. I would feel differently if the child was already born though. That would be too far.
He did make a baby, he made her... and as her parent he should know better and seek. other solutions first. and how would it be differently if the baby was born?
He mad her yeah but she's a grown woman. She's not 16 she's 26. She'll figure it out. As someone whose been pregnant and homeless, I would definitely kick my kid out for doing that. It would be different if the baby was born obviously because a baby sleeping on the streets vs a pregnant person sleeping on the street are very different.
No it wouldn't be different, because she would provably still be homeless after the baby is born, if she/the baby survives. And just because it happened to you it doesn't make it ok. If people think it is ol to treat family like that then there is no wonder this world sucks. If your own family doesn't love you, then who will?
First off, this guy told her she had to leave within one month. She's not just on her ass in the streets. Were going to have to agree to disagree because you're not going to change my mind and I'm not going to change yours. Why put the poll if all you're going to do is go through the comments trying to push your belief onto everyone you disagree with? Lol
It's called debate. 🤦 A rational person should seek to see things from different point of views, not get mad when someone disagrees. That is your problem not mine. This website isn't just for asking about things you don't know.
I already seen it from the other point of view which was my point of bringing up my past. He is not responsible for HER child. Im sorry you feel that way but that isn't life. Yes, its nice to be able to take care of your family and love your family but actions like this require consequences and she's just lucky he gave her a month. You under estimate the love of a mother and what it can make you do she's not going to just be homeless. And even if she was put flat out on the streets, like I said that wouldn't make me feel any different. This debate is pointless, I already said my said and you said yours I don't need for you to continually try and change my opinion because I can guarantee you, you never will. So us engaging with each other at this point is pointless and I think it best we end the conversation with each other. I heard your point of view, I lived your point of view, and so my opinion hasn't and won't change. I mean if you would like to continue to debate with me on the topic thats fine we can run around in circles saying the same thing in different ways, never actually changing how we feel... OR we can do what NORMAL people would do and move on. And FYI, I never thought this websites use was just for. asking things I don't know, if you took the time while you were clearly on my profile you'd have seen I've also provided numerous opinions so far. I think you're just upset that the majority of people don't see it your way regardless of how many times you comment "but what about the baby? He's her famimily!!!" I'm sorry to have to point this out to you but the blood of the covenant is thicker than the water of the womb.
No, I'm not saying that it has become relative... Im saying there's no point in engaging at this point. We both voice our points, I'm head strong you also seem head strong. We won't be meeting in the middle anytime soon. So whats the point of a discussion beyond this point? There isn't one in my opinion.
As much as I accept it was extreme of him to react that, to his daughter and his wife. I can understand how he felt. It's obviously seen that he was very attached to the cat and has a long history with it. The daughter did take things too far by sending the cat away eithout even consulting him first or taking his permission.
I can neither agree or disagree with his actions but I can understand why he chose to act this way.
I'd tell my daughter to go back and get that mother effing pet back. ASAP or I'm giving her 2k and telling her go find some other place to live. Never mess with a mans pet or your asking for an apocalyptical situation.
She is 26. An adult. If she is incapable of understanding her actions and consequences - then it is fully on her. Yes, you can argue the parents probably spoiled her too much to act like this, but a reality check will do her good. 100% approve of this.
Ten year old cat is not old for a cat... Anyway, stupidest damn thing his daughter could do and nuts that his wife went along with it. Giving her a month was kind. Plenty of programs for single moms out there. I would not have given her a month. I would have given her an hour. It’s my fucking house. She could take and sell my personal belongings under the same guise. So no. She’s gone. Find a shelter... that’s too much of a line she crossed. My wife would not be off the hook so easily.
He's her father, he knows her mental state, throwing away a pet because it could be a nuisance without the owner's permission is bullshit, relative or otherwise, pets can be considered family. She was definitely out of line. I would probably throw her out too, but make sure she has somewhere to stay.
I think the daughter is over stepping her boundaries, but that being said she is his daughter and she’s pregnant and has no home, I definitely think her dad should let he stay for the sake of her and her baby’s safety
It's an old dirty cat is this real or some made up rubbish? I can't imagine a cat having so much sway over a guy, maybe there is some type of strange disorder or illness he has makeing him love a cat like a person shouldn't, I don't like em they are phycopathic play with pray for fun and kill for nothing not even to eat and they carry a lot of things that's harmful to kids so he's a fool, ye if this is real he's a fool that's not worth knowing.
How about the baby? And so, it is ok to throw out your child and let them be homeless at their lowest point in life without second chances? I am not defending her shitty behaviour, but I can see she may not be thinking clearly.
Dude, that is grandchild. That is why this world is fucked. If you are willing to put your grandchild at risk and your daughter at her first offense then who will you show empathy towarfs? If it isn't her usual behaviour, he could have sent her to therapy, a pregnant woman who has nowhere to live and no husband anymore is a very vulnerable and instable person. He could find a way for her. He is her dad, he is responsible for brining her into the world, so he shouldn't be so harsh. He could find. a way to. protect the cat and her baby.
@emmily2396 She should be getting both child support and spousal support so she would not be homeless. She just wants to mooch off mom and dad instead of her husband where she should be staying as it is his kid too. Mom and dad shouldn't have to support her - her hubby and her should be paying the tab as I'm sure they have health insurance for expenses and both have jobs.
@emmily2396 According to a lot of what some women say here on GaG she should have gotten an abortion. I would never say that but there are a lot of pro-abortionists on here that would.
Let's not play the "oh the children" or "oh the baby" card here. Pregnant women are not helpless, and pregnant women don't get a free pass to do as they please in others' homes. She got herself in the situation. She had a chance to live at the parents' home for the foreseeable future, but squandered it. He gave her 30 days to find other accommodations, so she needs to get cracking. She'll figure it out.
I wouldn't treat my family like that unless they are really shitty people, let alone a pregnant family member. And how do you know she will figure it out? How will she work considering she will have a point when she will need to stay at home due to health reasons? Plus, nobody will hire someone that will need to take a lot of time off in just a few months. It was her first offense, as a more mature person and her father he could have analyzed her behaviour and decided if it is out of ordinary. That was probably one of her lowest points in life and probably needed therapy, not eviction. That is why this world sucks. People can empathize with a cat and not with a human being. I am not saying she was right or that he shouldn't stop her from touching the cat, but that putting his cat above his innocent unborn grandchild and daughter doesn't make him less of an asshole.
Why do you ask a question yet dismiss the majority of the answers here that say he has the right to ask her to leave? I have said she should be getting child support or spousal support but you just keep carrying on about the baby. If she got pregnant when the marriage was sour that was her decision and her problem that SHE needs to deal with it, not come to her parents house and act like she is a queen and dispose of someone else's property. As others have said they have women's shelters for pregnant women. She can go there but if she does the same stuff there I'm sure she would be kicked out there too.
Oh, she'll figure it out because she has to, and people can be pretty darn resourceful when they're in a situation where they can't rely on others as a crutch. For starters, where's the baby daddy in all this? That's the best place to start. Friends, his family, and failing that, social services - she can be a welfare mama for a while. We don't know the family dynamics other than the one event, so details as to circumstances of her marriage and divorce aren't available, and it's foolish to guess at info that isn't even available. Instead of rationalizing why things can't be done here without even trying and coming full circle back to rationalizing why it's some sort of obligation to keep her (oooooh, the unborn baby, oooooh the pregnant daughter), she has 30 days to get off her butt and figure it out. Again, she will, and it may be the best life lesson she ever learned. If a woman in her 7th month of pregnancy can scramble and find work at Home Depot, she can do the same. Pregnancy does not mean invalid. Individual value judgements based on what YOU might do don't apply to the rest of the world here. He may be an asshole, but he's within his rights to be. She's not a ditzy teen who got herself pregnant, she's 26. I'm a criminal defense lawyer, and sometimes empathy is warranted, sometimes it isn't. This is one where it is not. As far as "first offense" goes, she's not in a court of law. His home is not a democracy. He has a right to be an asshole here, he has to live with it. And she has an inherent right to be stupid. But she has to live with it, not expect others to accommodate her. And when it's all over and she's on her feet, she owes him the $100 he had to spend to get the cat back.
@Daniela1982 Abortion is definitely an option for her, and might be a good one for her at that. Beyond the pregnancy, how is she going to care for it? Suck on the parents' teats and rely on them for support?
@luvmesomeboysI never recommend abortions except under certain circumstances and this is not one of them. We also don' know how far along she is so there are laws that do apply here.
Hence I said might be. You’re right, we don’t know how far along she is. It depends on her state of residence where the laws are concerned and I’m all to familiar with them. Regardless, it’s an option and a choice. Personally I’m not a fan of abortion or adoption (of newborns) either. But I do question suitability and ability to care for a baby when she doesn’t seem to be doing too great at caring for herself. But it’s a family squabble, they can figure it out. Or not.
Sorry, I misread it, but I still think she's got the chance to apologise and live with the cat being there. In other words, I voted A, but he hasn't chucked her out yet, and he can't demand an apology, because anything she said then would be worthless. It's up to her.
I mean, would you throw out your pregnant daughter and risk making her and your unborn grandchild homeless at her first offense? I'd be pissed off too, but my future kids would have to be really shitty people to make me do something like this, especially if they are pregnant at the moment. The unborn kid has no fault. I would tell her that if anything happens to the cat, even "accidental", then I will throw her out, allow her to sleep in the basement/garage only, or call the police for animal abuse.
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