Is it sexist to want a woman to cook, clean and raise your kids?

Question

Cook, clean and raise your kids? If so, why do you feel it is?

This was the marital arrangement and societal norm for literally thousands of years. Men have been (and are still) expected to pay for a woman's dinner, be the primary breadwinner, keep the house in good repair and to take care of women when they are pregnant. Women still expect men to ask them out and court them and compete for their affections.

I only want to date or marry a woman that will raise our children and cook, clean and take care of the house. I don't want her to work outside the home unless she can make good money at a real job, as long as she is willing to do these things alongside myself. I cook and clean too, but I think it is a woman's job to raise the children.

Updates

+1 y

Also I only want a woman that has saved herself for marriage

Updates

+1 y

No, I just think some women are of lesser value than other women but that's all down to personal perspective and opinion. I make enough money that I could easily buy a house and make 2.

Instead I spend it on booze and karaoke with my friends lol

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

If she agrees it's fine. Many women won't mind doing this if the man makes enough money and doesn't treat her like a maid just because she cleans and raises the children. Marriage is really a contract in a sense, if you both agree to certain parts it's fine, but the problems really hit when men start saying women are inferior or dumb or worthless for doing this. If you treat her like your maid, that's when it's a problem. If you treat her with respect and appreciate that she does this, it's okay. This means that she should appreciate you and your breadwinning as well, don't get me wrong.

On the other hand, different people want different things. If a woman wants a career, you can't force her to change for you, and she can't force you to change for her. You just need to find someone with your values.

About the virginity thing...that's nice and all but the majority of girls are not virgins unless you are pretty religious and looking for a girl with the same beliefs. There's a difference between not being a virgin and being a girl with a "reputation" who slept around with everybody in the fraternity. If a girl had sex once or twice in her life and has class and manners and treats herself with respect, I think it's a bit closeminded to rule her out because she had sex, but that's just my opinion.

skittledittle · Accepted Answer

it's sexist if you think that's my sole purpose for existence and if you think you should never have to lift a finger to cook/clean/raise your children.

i will say that with the economy that's happening right now, that standard is changing. men are losing jobs and women are entering male dominated fields. usually both parents are working, so if you expect me to work and do everything housewife on my own, you're definitely out of your mind.

i think everything should be fifty-fifty. you should cook at least twice a week and help with the chores. you should definitely be more than the disciplinary figure when it comes to the children as well. I think it's important that kids themselves see equality so that they know to equally respect their parents (sometimes the dad works and losing the relationship with the children and sometimes the mother loses her parental power since she's just seen as "mom"). hope that makes sense.

brunettebelle · Answer

The roles are changing, there are stay at home dads where they do the housework while mom is the one making money. I must ask, do you wish you lived in the 50's?

I personally would be bored if I was a stay at home mom, I want to work and travel, make new friends as well.

I agree that women should be the caregiver to children, women are openly emotional and the reason is to give love to her offspring. HOWEVER the husband should help and not kick back with his beer as the little fu'ckers are running around making a loud ruckus. He should be loving and firm but really chill too.

xViVx · Answer

I personally agree with you on the virginity thing, it’s a big deal where I come from . As for the cooking , cleaning , raising the children part , in reality it is what most women do after marriage even if it sounded sexist to many women , after all this is what they end up doing and that fact does not express my feelings on this matter , I still think a woman must seek a good living for her family outside the house by having a decent job that will send her children to college one day or pay for her children`s piano lessons , help pay the bills , buy her own clothes and jewelry ...so many things.

So my point is, as women we are bound to do both, have a job and cook, clean, raise children, we do BOTH that’s why we are supposed to be CHERISHED for it!

Anonymous · Answer

You can want certain things, but not all women are going to do this.  I personally don't want children, so I wouldn't be compatible with you.  I also expect you to your half of the chores, as a I work just as many hours of the day as you do, if not more.

Anonymous · Answer

no I don't think so. If you believe this is what you want, it's fine. Although it doesn't matter if it is sexist or not. If someone you love wants to take that role, it is fine. It is just not fine to be forced in that role. I think that's what sexism is, when people are *expected* to take one kind of role. As long as you are not forcing everyone to do that for u, its not sexist. Someone special might love to cook for you and raise your children and thas fine with everyone else too.

TheBigGuy9 · Answer

Nope, not one bit. Especially if you’re the provider. You make enough money that she doesn’t have to work, she should be cooking you food. Doing your laundry. Ironing your clothes, giving you a back rub. Making you feel like a king.
That’s not my thing though. I like an equally active woman and I prefer to do the cooking anyways. That way I know it will be done correctly.

SkyBlossom · Answer

Hey if he doesn't want me to have a job, then I would totally do an awesome job at all of those things.

What I feel is a double standard is guys want to have a job and for us to work on top of taking care of the kids, the house, the chores, etc.

udolipixie · Answer

Not sexist it's sexist to think a woman is of less value than a man.

purplepearls · Answer

it's not sexist but personally , I want a man that can cook, clean and take care of the house. It has to be a mutual thing.

itskatiee · Answer

No it is not sexist at all! I completely understand that you want to have a women to raise your children and help around your home. I also think its great that you want a girl who saved herself for marriage :)

Anonymous · Answer

Yes it is.The responsibility should be shared

Is it sexist to want a woman to cook, clean and raise your kids?

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