I always help people but nobody ever helps me out when I'm in need of a help. Yet I can't stop helping people out. How to be not worried about it?

[kinggeorge007]

I have this ability of creating/suggesting solutions and making people good about things. Giving out positive thoughts and stuff. People seem to like my opinions and suggestions. So I like when they ask for ideas or vent to me for positive feelings from me.

But when I'm in need nobody seems to know what to say or what to suggest or they deliberately ignore them when they need to think of something and suggest me to do something.

When people want something they will call me or text me for very long times and I help them out throughout the time pausing whatever I did when they called/texted, but when I need something it's just one text or something and then they go silent leaving me on unread.

I just don't understand why and what to do about it. Any thoughts why?

PS: I mean I can resolve my issues and I know solutions to most of the stuff I face but I need a simple nudge or push to be in the right direction. Just a simple validation is what's needed. And I need it once in a while.

Even in a rare case when people suggest me to do something, they tend not to repeat the same thing again and again when asked the same thing again. (But for me, it's not a problem, I repeat myself when advising people. That's why I'm frustrated.)

Is it possible that they think I know what to do and they don't have to tell me what to do?

[Espresso-Grande]

It could be me writing this 😂 it's the same way for me

I think people assume you don't need help due to you being the one always there for them. Or they may think their advice and help wouldn't be any use to you considering you are good at helping others. And some people are useless at giving advice so they just don't give it.

[kinggeorge007]

Or is it just they are selfish? I didn't want to call them that but is it what it is?

[Espresso-Grande]

That's another reason 😂 some people are very selfish. They're all take and no give. But when you get to know someone over a period of time, it's easy to determine if the reason is because they're selfish or not

Years ago, when I was going through a bad time in my life, i craved for someone to confide in. I confided in a friend, but I got no response. It ended up in an argument, because I always supported her when she needed a shoulder to lean. She said she did care, but she just didn't know what to do or say. So she said nothing in case she said the wrong thing and made me feel worse.

So i guess there's various motives that people have for not being their for you.

[Espresso-Grande]

There**

[kinggeorge007]

I'm in a similar situation. I never confide in strangers or acquaintances. So these are long known "friends".

Yeah you maybe right. But then again I've seen there are people say things about them being best advisors and stuff. I just can't figure out where my case has gone wrong.

[Espresso-Grande]

I totally get where you're coming from. It's so frustrating and hurtful when people you've been there for aren't there for you. We all need a listening ear and advice at times. I have gotten so used to being there for myself now, that it never surprises me when people I care about can't or won't be there for me.

Even if i knew u couldn't help someone, I'd still try

[kinggeorge007]

Thanks a lot for sharing your experience. Reading this I felt like I'm not alone. Thanks for taking the time for replies. :)

[Espresso-Grande]

Thanks for the MHO

You're very welcome. :)

[Waldoe]

most people do not like to give advice unless asked, it is very Rude to offer your opinion when it is none of your business in the first place

[kinggeorge007]

This entire rant is about "when asked" situation. Sorry if I wasn't very much clear about it.

[NathanDavis]

what can I help you with?