Is this skinny shaming also does this lady sound like my friend?

[Anonymous]

To start off I am skinny/underweight but I also have a small body frame so I don't think I look that skinny.

In America, I feel like with everyone normally weighing more, I probably look like a skeleton to them. But I find it really annoying it's not easy for me to gain weight and also what's wrong with being skinny?

I have this friend and the topic of my weight sometimes comes up. She brings it up, I don't. It pisses me off and makes me uncomfortable. But I haven't voiced that to her because it's hard for me to be assertive.

She was telling me that she tries to eat healthy all the time. She looks normal weight to me. I told her I should do that more too that I eat unhealthy all the time.

And she said that's surprising because I am really skinny. I told her I have a fast metabolism. She said I'm lucky to have that. I told it's not that amazing to lose weight so easily I'd rather gain weight easily.

She said all I have to do to gain weight is eat more and I told her I do eat a lot. And she just looked at me with this smile like yeah right you eat a lot.

That pissed me off like what's your problem? It annoyed me and hurt my feelings. I actually don't like talking about my weight I have a lot of trauma tied to it because in school I was bullied about my weight from kids asking if am anorexic and making fun of me.

I haven't talked about my weight with someone since high school normally adults are mature enough to not talk about it. She's the first one in years to point out the obvious and I feel like I'm in high school all over again and I have to defend myself. It pisses me off.

Other than that we have talked about other stuff and had normal conversation. She has always been nice to me and given me nice gifts for no reason and she bought me these nice gloves for Christmas.

I always thought she was a kind lady but she has been bringing up my weight kind of often and I'm wondering if she's really my friend. I don't understand why she brings up my weight.

Updates

1 y

Another thing she said about my weight. I was telling her about how I used to work at Amazon but I quit because I was losing a lot of weight and I didn't want to lose anymore. And she said to me, "That's good because if you lose anymore you would just disappear." And I thought that was a weird thing to say. Like that doesn't make me feel good by her saying that.

[Guy13]

Yes, she seems to be trying to make you self-conscious. I would avoid her for awhile.

If you increase your good carbohydrates and twice your protein whether meat or bean then you will gain weight.

[Asker]

Will I gain mostly fat?

[Guy13]

If you eat proteins it will be muscle. You will need carbs or your body will burn proteins and you will never put on muscle definition

[Asker]

Ok I'll try it. Thank you. Actually I did gain a lot of weight in the past by force feeding myself. I would eat super unhealthy/ fast food every day. I was definitely eating over 2500. I gained 22 pounds in two years. But it was mostly fat. Then I get into this habit of being too busy to always stuff my face and I ended up losing 11 pounds of that weight in like three or four months. Now I'm like just at a skinny weight again. I feel lazy like I don't want to force feed myself giant bowls of ice cream and eat entire pizza or have a couple burgers. I just wanvto eat normal amounts like a normal person. Eat when I'm hungry and not worry about it you know? I like having a lower body fat %. When I gained that fat a good portion of it went into my chin lol I was kind of skinny fat but I had a double chin lol it was weird.

[Guy13]

I am talking like 3 eggs, 2 chicken breast soy or Lima beans for proteins. Until you start putting on fat keep doing carbs. If you run low on carbs body will take proteins. Look up good carbs which are fruit and vegetables. Let me know how it goes.

[Asker]

Ok I'll let you know in a couple of months. I won't see results until then. Thank you again for the advice :)

[Berethor]

I had criticized a skinny girl in the past, nowadays I mostly don't care about that.

[Asker]

Why did you criticize her?

[Berethor]

I compared her to skeleton, told her that she going to break, and show her that video.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v4HE4Ucsg1I

[Asker]

😂😂🤣 that's a funny video. But it's not cool of you to skinny shame her. I doubt she has an eating disorder and even if she did that's not the way to go about it with interacting with someone as delicate as her.

Attacking her weight isn't going to make her eat more. If it was that simple she wouldn't be skinny, she would be force feeding herself to fit everyone's idea of how she should live her life.

She could have turned it around on you and called you fat. Not saying you're fat though but just saying she could have made you feel bad as well.

I just don't see the point in treating each other like that. We should be kind to one another.

[Berethor]

She was vegan and eating very little, and she did criticize me on other things, so she was not innocent, but yea I started it, she also wanted to date me so yea it was not very smart move on my part, but I was really worried about her weight and that she going to break, anyway nowadays I don't do that, unless a girl is even more skinny, like to the point where her bones can be easily seen.

[MadKez]

Yes it's a thing