I have a nosey mother, what can I do?

[Anonymous]

My mom is very nosey, spying kind of person. She doesn't respect privacy. she looks through my stuff all the time. One time she looked through some personal items (sexual) and started to interrogate me about it which made me really feel angry and violated. Like jeez i am an adult and my dick is none of ur business!!!

I feel i can't even breath. She is awake all the time i dont even have personal time to talk on the phone with my girlfriend. She is suffocating me. I moved out years ago but i visit her for extended periods because she doesn't want to be alone. She is like that since i was a child. And No her spying ways never protected me from harm. It had always negative results. I feel like i am in prison where no stone is left unturned. The house is big but there is no place in this fucking big house where i can hide anything personal from her.

even when i ask her to respect my space she becomes more aggressive in spying.

Why is she doing this? Is she crazy?

[Anonymous]

i'm gonna guess your parents divorced at a very young age because my mother acts the exact same. you're just lucky enough to have moved away. there is no setting boundaries for these types of people. sometimes you just have to take it. but then your mental health takes a hit. and that causes even more problems with you two and makes situations even worse. there is no winning with this one.

[Asker]

Thats true. My parents are actually seperated. And yes she doesn't understand boundries nor respects them. Something i woulr never understand

[Asker]

*i would

[OlderAndWiser]

She is crazy and you appear to be a willing partner in her insanity. You can't control your mother's behavior but perhaps you can change your own behavior so this doesn't continue to happen. . . unless you ctually enjoy participating with her games.

[Asker]

No i dont enjoy such games at all. Its just i get tired of acting careful all the time. I just ignore her spying until i can go back to my place. But it gets really tiring to feel watched all the time. She even watches me through the cctv camera leaving the house

[OlderAndWiser]

Stop going to see her at her home. Offer to meet her at a restaurant for lunch or dinner.

[Asker]

Its a bit difficult to meet her for a short time as i live hours away and i have to stay to help her out with many things. I think i would just make the visit days less for now.