Do you tend to value men or women's opinions more? Why?

Question

I dislike that my boyfriend appears to ONLY value men’s opinions. Anything I or any other woman says to him goes in one ear and out the other. But let a guy say the same thing and he's all ears and ready to take the advice.

Anyways, it made me question whose opinions I tend to value? I am very stubborn and not many people can get through to me. I can only think of one girl who has just really gotten through to me but I guess I notice that it’s mostly been guys, thus I value men’s opinions more.

I don't know if my guy simply values the male view more because he’s so insecure and intimidated by other men, which he says all the time. But I value the guys perspective because I want to know how to captivate, communicate with, and better understand the gender that I’m attracted to.

Some may call that a “pick me” but I don’t consider it the same thing. I feel pick me’s seek validation while I more so want advice and guidance. Who better to understand a guy I’m into than a guy himself?

If I wanted advice on how to improve my appearance, dress style or to better control my emotions, then I’d seek a woman’s advice since we better understand one another’s insecurities and reactions. I rarely ask other women for advice on guys though because so many take it as competition to go after that same guy. Its so weird. Girlcode always seems to go out the window.

Another thing could be that I grew up looking up to my grandpa more than anyone else. I also got along best with my male cousin and my uncle. My friends have always been 90% guys. Like, my mom held it down for a bit but her inconsistent behavior and broken promises really got to me. So I stopped looking up to her. Maybe she, my grandma and a bunch of flaky female friends and cousins ruined it for other women too.

Some men have wronged me but never as many men as women. I guess same can be said for my boyfriend since he feels more women have wronged him yet all I ever see these days is men treating him badly. #FeelFreeToList

Do you tend to value men or womens opinions more? Why?

AlexEfron · Accepted Answer

😂 this question will label me sexist 😂.

I do tend to "accept" a guy's advice more often than a girls. I'm open to hear everyone's opinions, but from my personal experience, I haven't had too many girls who've given me good advice.

(Generalization) I've seen that guys tend to be more thoughtful about the consequences and are better at analysing and predicting possibilities. Girls on the other hand, have always given me advice which might seem great at first but almost always has led to a disaster. (NOT ALL GIRLS. There is one friend who's reliable. But 1 out of so many, makes her an exception).

I've seen that a girl's advice is often directly linked with some sort of gain. Example: a girl I knew was having some trouble with her relationship. Her friend (girl) gaslighted her into believing all is well, they guy will eventually come back, everything's great, she doesn't need to worry. There was absolutely no reason to give her a false sense of hope. For the very same context a guy's opinion was - it's over. There's no hope left. Don't bother trying, you'll only hurt yourself more. Guess what she did? She chose the girl's advice and now she's on a complete social media detox 😂. Hibernation after the trauma.

I think (completely my opinion), this is because of how boys and girls are. Girls generally hide a lot of things. Anything that might have adverse effects is as good as nonexistent to her. Guys on the other hand are more direct. If it's bad, just face it, it's bad. It can get worse, but right now it's bad. No sugarcoating, no flattery. Direct and blunt.

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

It depends on what’s it’s about. I think one major hang up guys have about trusting female advice stems from our past experiences with dating. What women “say” they want in dating and romance often contradicts what they really want. That is a hard lesson many young naive young men had to come to grips with a one point. This left a very negative impression on a lot of men and makes men trust female opinions a lot less.

Women tend to make more decisions emotionally and men tend to make decisions based on logic. This extends beyond romance. You see it in politics. Women also change their minds a lot more often on issues than men do.

This is not to say I am never going to trust any woman’s advice and trust every man’s point of view. Hell no. But men are held to a higher standard when it comes to controlling out emotions when it comes to our decisions and advice. Women go back on their word often due to being “emotional” and men are supposed to accept it. However there is a saying about “being a man of my word” If a man keeps contradicting himself people lose trust in him fast.

It’s also one of the reasons men have a harder time seriously saying “I love you”. Because for us it’s not just an expression of a feeling but it an actual pledge of loyalty. We don’t take that lightly.

Simslover92 · Accepted Answer

I think I value the male perspective just a bit more because I didn't grow up with a father in my life so I have only grown up with the woman's perspective and when I did finally get a decent father figure in my life, I really valued his views and opinions. He taught me a lot about how to value myself and how to love myself and have respect for myself. And then when my current boyfriend and I became friends, I valued what he had to say and he taught me a lot about the male mind and how it works. A lot of what they say and do are more pragmatic and logical than a woman's opinion. This is not to say a woman can't have logical opinions or be practical but more often than not they tend to give emotional opinions and advice and when I listened to their advice when I was dealing with the first guy I fell for, it was the wrong advice.

I think about the movie He's Just Not That Into You and the main guy gives sound advice to Gigi about men. When they don't give a shit, they generally don't give a shit. A woman is not going to tell another woman this. Instead she is going to feed her bullshit on how the guy may be into you but just doesn't know how to express it when really he just doesn't care anything about you.

dustybiker2 · Accepted Answer

I've noticed both genders can give an opinion with the goal of manipulating the reader.

I've also known both genders to give a neutral opinion not caring if the reader agrees or not. So I do not hold value with gender when it comes to advice.

I'm less inclined to accept angled advice.

Advice freely given is usually solid experience. You can tell straight up which is coming at you.

Billlewis · Answer

Women's options, always.

Drew-1990 · Answer

I can't vote on this because honestly it depends on the circumstances. Sometime I listen to women more and sometimes men more. If it is dating and stuff in usually listen to girls more because they are who I am after so I want to know what they want and need. When it's normal guy's behavior if I think I'm got a different opinion than most or something like that I listen to guys more because us men know each other better, we think differently from women. I think when it's comes to other things again it depends sometimes guys know better and sometimes girls know better.

ShadezMcgee · Answer

Namely men's. Because the issues I have tackled or deal with have namely been regarding an experience that really men have gone through or can offer insight on as fellow men. It isn't anything against women, but when going to a woman as a man, it tends to backfire in the sense of how they view you in terms of competence.

RavVid · Answer

I do feel more confident in girl's explanations of girls. A girl and I had a pact of vetting girls/guys of interest to us. It was pretty clear both of us missed some major negatives in our interests. Girls primarily seemed to miss that a guy is bullshitter and can't seem to help but like arrogance couple with ignorance

For anything other than girls then I would value a guys opinion more unless the woman had professional qualification in the area.

mstbooblover · Answer

Difficult to know on forehand whether I'd value more men's or women's opinions, because this depends on what subject or topic would be involved. When my wife was still alive, I generally asked for her opinion. Still, maybe I tend to have a wee little preference for women's opinions. Maybe, in spite of my nightmare of a stepmother and stupid father, different women had an excellent influence on me during my childhood.

RHK36 · Answer

A bit of both depending on what the topic is. Not necessarily value one over the other. Usually get the opinion of both sides out of curiosity. I almost take no one's advice, just ask to gauge how my decision will go. Most times I'll ask more women than men because I'm a man, so I already know how we think. My inner circle is 2 of my best guy friends and we have healthy conversations which helps for the male perspective. So I do have a couple girl besties I'll run shit by to see how a woman looks at it.

CheeseMonster · Answer

Generally women. I just haven't met many men in my life who I could reason with honestly—including myself for a long while. I trust women's judgement more because I think if she has given her opinion before and turned out to be wrong, she would be more likely to change it. I've also met unreasonable women, just not as many. I know this is a huge generalization.

Purpleronnie · Answer

It really depends on the subject or genre of advice I need and who I consider to have the right experience , emotional intelligence , wisdom etc to give me what I need. Advice givers can placate you , tell you what they think you “want” to hear. I need honest advice with reason and understanding and sometimes it needs to be hard to hear or take because that’s the “right” advice. This is NOT about gender !! It’s about who you look to. Most days I bet on me , I trust my gut , my head and my heart but we should all feel comfortable letting those that are experienced guide us as long as it comes from the right place. Gender features nowhere in this

Lottydotty · Answer

Depends on the women but yeah mostly women. They're great for a lot of things actually. Guys I'm around have too many insecurities to make real decisions based on anything other than what sounds cool and funny.

kellytheman · Answer

I think I do value women’s opinions or perspectives so I can see what they see. Also most of my guy friends are kinda stupid and only think about what they think. However it also depends what subject or situations you need for a different perspective.

elaphe · Answer

Women's opinions. They tend to be more mature and perceptive.

MemeSupreme · Answer

kinda depends on the topic but it's usually women. i just talk to my grandma and best friend 90% of the time so it just happened to be like that

i might ask my dad for advice on drugs but that's it for dudes lmfao

PeachyPie93 · Answer

I never really thought of it but I don't think I really value anyone's opinion, since most people give shit advice. Maybe I take guys more seriously tho, it depends on if I think the person is smart or not.

Wiredone · Answer

I used to value my parents advice more than anyone. Now that they are both gone, my wife and I discuss everything. Her opinion matters the most

Amiapowerlessman · Answer

Mostly a woman’s opinion due to experience… usually a woman will give me an opinion and have a good reason as to why as for my guy friends they don’t really have anything to back up what they say lol.

mandyfire98 · Answer

The person not the gender really.

Twalli · Answer

I go to Pepper who can answer the question better.

Counterculture, my dad

Medical, my mom

Coding, my supervisor

Sexual, my sister

Dogs, my dog

Love, anyone in my family

So it really depends on what I want to know. Those are wome examples.

dragoblack · Answer

I tend to value women's opinions more, because of the questions I ask on here, requires women's viewpoints, rather than the usual guy assumption responses... but there are times where i question the responses, due to common actions saying the exact opposite of what they think.

strateguy632 · Answer

yes, for certain types of questions here, where i suspect a sociological bend, i prefer how pink answered those or how blue answered others.

in general i love reading replies here. pink n blue, some i even like! n mark like too.

molonski2 · Answer

It depends on the topic , as to how I qualify the opinion giver , I don't care about gender , but that's if they know what they are talking about , experience will also account for a great deal.

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