Have your parents ever switched trajectories?

[Lynx122]

My mom used to be so kind and happy and full of life and she'd organize a lot of things for the family and do nice things for people etc. She loved us so fully. My dad was always distracted with taking pictures he used to constantly go off the path that we were going and make everyone wait for him, or he would not show up when we said we were going to meet. He used to pay for other peoples food/drinks or even once a whole vacation, but when we wanted something he'd tell us, it was too expensive. He used to always kinda feel the need to prove himself, he'd even put me down sometimes or set me up to fail and find it funny or comment on it. Not like constantly but it happened. Sometimes, or often, depending on the year, it just felt like we were not a priority. And that doesn't feel great. Now though he's getting older and he's calmed down a bit and he came to visit me multiple times. He's making time for me, showing up when we discussed. He's paying for me and his new girlfriend instead of trying to impress his friends. He still makes us wait because he's taking pictures, but it's not as bad as it used to be. Probably also because he's getting older. I was always wary with him and I had to cut off contact with him multiple times. If someone doesn't really care enough about you, you have to protect yourself. But now I feel like we're actually connecting. His girlfriend is also helping she's kind and patient and I get along with her as well.

My mom though, she's become kind of bitter, she started hating foreigners, muslims etc. I don't know it seems like she's not over what happened with my dad and my sister and everything. She's angry and hurt. In some ways she's still her old self but in other ways she's bitter and lonely. There's things I can't even talk about with her because I know it'll end in a mess, which was never the case in the past. I think I'll ask her if she's ever considered therapy because it feels like she needs it atm.

[TrueConfection]

My mom was the same way. She loved being a wife and mother. Family was very important and she’d make every holiday special. We ate dinner together no matter what, we were always taken care of and she made sure to schedule all sorts of fun for the family. She loved to cook my dad’s favorites and she was loyal to him. She worked a part time job to cover the costs of our fun and wants while my dad covered our needs.

My dad was resentful of those fun family outings taking up his time. He’d have fun while there, but then complain later about having spent time away from work or whatever he wanted to be doing. My dad was always bitter and my mom couldn’t make him happy. Eventually, she gave up. It’s like she lost her spark and gave up on all of us. She’d perk up on occasion at the mention of getting together, but then it’s like the switch would flip and she would crawl back into her shell. I blame my dad mostly.

[TrueConfection]

Thank you for the MHO🩷

[MemeSupreme]

kinda? the longest my dad was ever sober was a year when i was a kid and it was a mindfuck lol he was just a different person

and my mom is a whole fucking zigzag that i won't trauma dump you about bc i dont feel like typing all that lol

[Anonymous]

My grandfather was controlling , the center , and what he wanted to do we would have to wait

My grandmother was fun , exciting , and full of love to give

Things shifted and my grandfather was the one to give up control , give someone else the spotlight to feel special , and no longer were we waiting… He waited for us.

My grandmother went full 180.
My memories will always be cherished , though I separate them from the person I got a glimpse of in a new light. My grandfather I cherish in body and in memory ‘sort of speak’.

One piece of advice : Just try to be good / do good in life and you are one step there.

[DishLady]

Yeah...