Family & Friends
1 mo

Do you ever feel awkward or guilty about being better off than friends?

I think class and wealth in the UK are far more complicated than people make them out to be. I wouldn't consider myself rich or particularly well off. Like most people, I still worry about money, dread checking my bank account after filling my car up, and have months where there's very little left in our joint account after bills are paid.

I grew up in a three-bedroom housing association house with my two sisters. Space was tight, we had mould on the walls, we didn't wear designer clothes, and we often had to save birthday money if we wanted things like phones. My mum worked in a supermarket and my dad was a painter and decorator. Despite that, my parents prioritised travel and we were lucky enough to go abroad regularly, even visiting America a few times. Later in life, my parents became much more financially comfortable and now live very differently.

My husband came from a more middle-class background, with both parents having high powered jobs for large companies. He has also received more financial help than I ever did, although he works incredibly hard himself and is one of the hardest-working people I've ever met.

Today, we live in a three-bedroom townhouse and have savings, but I don't see that as being rich. Many of my friends have little or no savings and some are in debt, so when they see my savings they assume I'm wealthy. In reality, I think a lot of financial stability comes from saving, budgeting and being responsible with money.

I recently met a friend who lives in a one-bedroom flat with her partner and baby. She suggested somewhere cheap for lunch and only ordered a bacon sandwich and coffee. It made me very aware that our situations are different, and I almost feel uncomfortable letting people see my house because I don't want them to think differently of me.

To me, wealth isn't always about income. Circumstances, priorities, family support, spending habits and financial decisions all play a huge role in where people end up.
Do you ever feel awkward or guilty about being better off than friends?
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