My husband doesn't want us to leave his mother's house, what should I do?

[Anonymous]

My husband and I have been married exactly one year. We have no children and he works full-time, while I work part-time and attend University full-time. He's 26 and I'm 23. He is very irresponsible and I wish I had seen this about his personality way before I said "I do". We currently live with his mother and 2 young children and her husband. Its a pigsty of a house. Dirty with mice and his mother never cleans and she expects $750 a month to live in a dingy one room and sharing a bathroom with her and her family. I HATE our living conditions. I DON'T get along with his mother because she thinks I'm too clean and prissy. I'm not prissy but I came from a home where my mother made sure the house was squeaky clean. I feel like our relationship is going downhill in a crowded house with an evil in-law. I love my husband but he doesn't understand anything. I wish he would man up and move to an apartment where we could have space and be happy, but he's rather stick up under his mother where she cooks for him every night and hates my guts and acts like I don't exist. I know I made a foolish choice but I felt it was good at the time where my hubby promised me this lovely life that never happened.

[Aeranghae]

In my opinion, I think you should step into your husbands shoe and see his perspective. I'm not trying to say your wrong though! I know its not right to continue to live in your husbands mothers home but its better to discuss this with him privately without any interruptions. Although, saying I WISH isn't a good thing. You shouldn't be saying I wish*. A little more respect for your husband would be better... I understand, woman and men are clueless at times and don't seem to understand what your trying to say at times. Like most marriages, after they get married, they tend to drop their act they've kept up. Its best to find some alone time to say your opinions and hear your husband and his family side opinions as well. Continue to stay strong! Patience and endurance are important in a relationship : )

[Asker]

Thank you.

[sarcasticbella]

for the amount of money your paying I'm sure you can find an apartment. There has to be other reasons he doesn't want to leave besides her cooking because you could do that. Sit him down and find out why he really doesn't want to leave then address that problem. As a married couple its important that you have your own place right away so you can have a healthy relationship. Make sure he knows that you won't stick around forever and continue to be unhappy just because he refuses to grow up and be a man.

[xonycutiepie]

give him an ultimatum.. its not fair for you to live like that. You should have approached this issue before you married him but now its too late for that. Either you guys move out, or you leave him. You're clearly unhappy and that's not fair

[freewill10]

It broke my relationship when I lived with my in-laws. It was hell. Move by ALL means.

[Anonymous]

Tell him it is time for him to grow up and for the two of you to be on your own.