Guys: Do You Confuse Flirting with Being Nice?

[DarkSamus]

I wonder, are men generally confused about whether or not a girl is flirting versus just being nice? I've heard feedback from some people saying 'oh he was totally in to you' or, 'you were totally into him' just because I was being nice and smiling.

I'm a pretty bubbly person and I'm not going to put on a mean face just because. And I've found that being nice and talkative goes a long way in the way people perceive you.

However, this has also backfired because of the amount of times I've gained male friends and have had to put them in the friend zone to their disdain. I like my guy friends but (I hope this doesn't sound conceited, as I'm sure it happens to all girls) it just so happens they end up liking me.

So, where do you draw the line between being too nice vs. flirty?

[asdaven]

Physical Flirty stuff is where I draw the line. And I'm not talking kissing or sex. More like small stuff like grabbing my arm, sitting really close, holding hands,etc etc. I know some girls who are really nice and outgoing and I realize that theyre just being friendly. Be friendly with guys. You can have platonic friendships with the opposite sex without feelings or physical stuff. They can be really rewarding and a lot there's a higher level of trust and support there than many close romantic relationships people find themselves in. It always seems like a lot of guys and women have nothing to do with each other other than for romance or sex. And anybody else they have nothing to do with. Why? Its called being social. Just because a

Guy talks to a girl or a girl talks to a guy doesn't always mean they're hitting on them.

[InquisitiveMale]

I of course get my signals crossed from time to time. It's unavoidable when you continually stick your neck out. That guillotine will catch us all sooner or later. It's not my fault anyways. One thing means 'this given this person' and 'that given that person'. No hard feelings.

Where is the line drawn between nice and flirty? We all get to choose our own balance. The line is drawn when you no longer can withstand the consequences your flirtatious nature.

[Eva_Grace]

True that for me at least, I'm nice than SHABAM all these fellows like me, and then I feel like a meany saying I don't like them so I say nothing and get myself in the awkwardest situations :|

[Bear_of_Death]

Your mind is saying "no", but your language (body or vocal) is saying "yes".

[Anonymous]

This is the reason why I'm no longer friendly to men. They think I'm trying to flirt when I'm actually just a kind hearted person. Sucks.

[why-makoto-kun]

I get accused of that too, and I don't even touch when I flirt. Bah.

[tadpole25]

this is hard because every woman is different.

some women are flirty, teasing and touchy with all guys they meet and it's just a friend thing. other girls only do it when they flirt.

by now, I've realized that just because they're nice doesn't mean they're flirty.

[1stPlace]

I can tell when a girl is flirting and just being friendly. I can't tell when a girl is just flirting to inflate her ego or because she is really interested, however. So, I tend to be suspicious and think she isn't being genuine when she is flirting. As for the girl who is only being friendly: you can't help who you become attracted to; but you cannot force someone to like you back. Shit happens!

[Anonymous]

sometimes guys do mistake being nice for flirting or showing interest. I've heard some very bubbly talkative type of girls say "i wasn't flirting I was just talking and being friendly!" but I wonder if that's a load of crap half the time

[Bear_of_Death]

It's a load of crap 100% of the time.

[SamuelB]

If a girl is flirting with me I have no idea. Everyone I work with is pretty nice so I figure people are just like that.

[e92brah]

i always assume they are flirting with me

[Lj237]

i just assume they are being nice