"food gets stuck in it and it gets in my mouth whenever we kiss and then sometimes the shedding beard hair gets in my mouth too and I have to pull it out"
Ew.
Maybe stop shaving your pussy and when it gets scraggly and overgrown and he wants you to shave, you can just calmly look him in the eye and be like "let's make a deal." xD
Sure. Just tell him to fuck off. There. Easy, done.
Guys get with girls hoping they'll never change. Girls get with guys thinking if they bug the shit out of them hard enough and long enough he MIGHT become something she can stand to be with. FAIL.
What sacrifice are you willing to make for him? Donāt ask without offering up something you know he wants in trade. Could be wearing his favorite outfits more often, cutting your hair how he likes more and so on.
It sounds like you are being fair in that you didn't ask him to completely shave it off. How you get him to do it is tricky. Can you offer him something in trade?
@rjroy3 If she's unhappy with his beard it'll cause more unhappiness over timeand affect the relationship negatively.
It's kinda like leaving an old milk in the fridge. Right now it's somewhat unplesant to do something about, but if you don't do it now it'll be worse in the future. And if you never remove it it'll cause a bad environment for the rest of thestuff in the fridge.
@rjroy3 that would mean she would resent him secretly about it - that never works out well. It works both ways, he should care about what grosses her out.
true, but her hangup is less about the beard and more about the upkeep. She emphasized the points 1. dirty 2. scraggly with hairs getting into my mouth. Then said it was better when it was shorter. If he merely takes better care of his beard that solves both those issues.
That's disregarding the point that emotional manipulation, through using sex as a weapon in a relationship is a bad idea. Sure, just stop kissing him until he bends to whatever whim she wants without discussion or compromise of any kind on her end... . Even if she gets her way through doing that once. The relationship will end with decisions like that. He'll resent her for doing it, which is assuming he doesn't get into a fight over her trying to control his appearance.
Yes, he should care what grosses her out. No, she shouldn't use kissing him/affection as a weapon to get what she wants. No, cutting the beard is not the only solution for what's bothering her about the beard.
I say this as a currently clean shaven guy who often just goes with what my partner finds most attractive. If he really likes his beard. It's actually worse for her to try and force him to cut it, than for her to compromise and merely ask him to take better care of it. She already stated she's good with the beard. Just not a out of control, dirty beard which is reasonable.
@GreenPenguin poor example. Because the options aren't binary in this situation. I get what you're saying. My point is emotional manipulation is bad end if story and no it isn't a lesser evil. Nor is it a matter of 1. emotionally manipulate to get your way or 2. suffer in silence.
There are other options lol. That's flawed logic, tho very very common. We tend to look at things that way at times when both parties can win.
@rjroy3 he refuses to even do a trim and you think they can find a way to agree on it? He won't even clean it up a bit. Tell us what she does if he keeps on refusing it then? How are they ever going to agree on something, if he just refuses.
If it was me it would seriously gross me out and there's no way I'd kiss him so eh lol and I like beard, it's just gotta be properly maintained.
Going by what she said. She hasn't actually talked to him about taking care of his beard. Just stated she's grossed out by lack of cleanliness and it getting wiley. The only thing she stated she actually said to him was to cut the beard short.
A trim could just be trimming stray hairs and keeping the length. But yea, we can try and assume he wouldn't consider working with her on this. But why would we assume that? She never asked. Sure, he should know to clean his beard better. Him not having done so doesn't mean he wouldn't when its brought up that he should do better lol.
It's kind of like saying if someone texts at dinner that they'd never listen if you asked them to put their phone away. Because they should know better anyways and haven't done so already. Same logic.
Get him a beard kit that has a brush , comb , and beard oil his beard will look nicer , be softer and will shed less. There's some videos on YouTube on beard care and beard grooming Otherwise make a bet with him on something that if he looses he has to shave or trim But try a beard grooming kit
Or to get your point across don't shave your legs for 2 or 3 weeks and when he asks tell him it's comfortable or tell him you will shave when he does
Well if it bothers you that much then just leave him. Usually when a woman begins changing her SO, way down deep she is starting to venture off to another. You must have identified another male in your circle that has this and your mind is trying to fit the current SO to the one you desire in fact.
@Melshmallow046 Then he will get tired of it and get rid of it on his own. I did it and I got tired of it and buzzed it. Sometimes just subtle hints of pulling away in a kiss or putting on an icky look face is more effective than brute force ultimatums. I certainly could take a hint and it would plant the idea in my head that maybe this thing "ain't" so cool. When you got out, simply notice a guy with the face you like and let him know you like it.
Don't tell him to do something about his appereance, that's kind of like him saying 'you Have to shave your pussy or I won't eat it, or you have to shave in general or else I'm not okay with u', i mean you can't tell anyone what to do about themselves, it's his own fucking choice, he is his own person, and I'm SURE it doesn't kill u, so stop being such a brat and accept him for who he is, it's not that big of a deal.
A scraggly beard does look horrendous I agree, I suspect he is trying to grow it long.. But he needs thickness. Long thick beard takes time but you look good by slowly keeping it in shape as it grows.
2
0 Reply
Anonymous
(25-29)
+1 y
I don't understand either. but somehow it's funny lol. sometimes he shaved it all. but sometimes he doesn't want and didn't want to listen to me. he prefers to look older than younger. I don't understand. sigh. he's 10 years older than me, when he shave m, I feel like we are same age, but when he doesn't shave it, i feel like dealing with some old man 🧔 feels like I'm with a guardian. 🤦🏻āāļø I think I'll shave him when he's sleeping
Blackmail. The best way to keep a relationship healthy.. and alive. (Sarcasm). Counter ultimatum: she accepts his beard or she leaves. Sounds better to me :)
What the fuck is wrong with you and every woman who upvoted this? This is why women complain about being single, because they do childish shit like that. This is how you lose someone, not how you get them to do what you want. How about you approach the subject with maturity and not be bitchy about it?š¤ You have to strike a bargain with him. If you want him to shave, you're going to have to sacrifice something or do things he wants you to do. Saying, "Cut your beard or I'll: break up with you, not have sex with you, or won't shave." Sounds a lot like what kids say, "if you don't do what I say I'm not gonna be your friend anymore." If you're saying things like that you shouldn't be in a relationship with anyone.
Tell him to maintain good health and cleanliness of his beard. Don't tell him to trim he's obviously not going that and he doesn't have to trim it for anyone.
Let him keep it for a while, I can almost promise that eventually shaving will enter his mind. A comedian said it best, I can't remember who; the only reason he said he grew his beard is because men dont have anything else left for themselves lol but its sorta true.
Tell him to shave that damn thing off there's nothing worse than a guy going down on you and you getting stabbed by all this freaking hair or when you're trying to kiss him and it just stab you in the face
It's up to him what he wants to do with his facial hair. How would you feel if he told you to shave your lips and you didn't want to (if you don't shave)?
See if you can both compromise but ultimately, it is his choice.
Stop shaving your legs, pits, your floofie, your lady mustache if you have one. Whatās good for the goose is good for for the gander. When he asks you why you stopped say ā let me look like a homeless personā. And laugh 😆 Iād shave
Geez. My man gets pretty rough and I'm curious for weeks of when he'll get a haircut and clean up his facial hair. He eventually do it or try if you ask rather politely a few times. But when he does, you have to reward him 💋
Itās similar to asking your girl to shave her legs if she doesnāt. If you canāt agree to a compromise and itās that big of a problem just leave him. No doubt it would be a stupid reason if you love each other. Otherwise you should accept him as he is
What Girls & Guys Said
Opinion
85Opinion
"food gets stuck in it and it gets in my mouth whenever we kiss and then sometimes the shedding beard hair gets in my mouth too and I have to pull it out"
Ew.
Maybe stop shaving your pussy and when it gets scraggly and overgrown and he wants you to shave, you can just calmly look him in the eye and be like "let's make a deal." xD
I'm glad I wasn't the only one thinking this... lol...
The Swiss have done research that says that the germs š¦ on a guyās beard š§ is worse than the germs found on a dog! https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=Ctb9VIOeCVA
@Poppykate it's very simple: grow a beard, fucking keep it clean lol
You'll have to drug him and then shave him against his will.
Sure it illegal, but thats pretty much the way its going to be.
Or
You leave him
He is not going to shave it off or trim it unless he wants to.
My beard is 3 feet long
Sure. Just tell him to fuck off.
There. Easy, done.
Guys get with girls hoping they'll never change.
Girls get with guys thinking if they bug the shit out of them hard enough and long enough he MIGHT become something she can stand to be with. FAIL.
What sacrifice are you willing to make for him? Donāt ask without offering up something you know he wants in trade. Could be wearing his favorite outfits more often, cutting your hair how he likes more and so on.
It sounds like you are being fair in that you didn't ask him to completely shave it off. How you get him to do it is tricky. Can you offer him something in trade?
Haha I know what you mean, I like stubble but too long can be gross.
stop kissing him, till he trims it 😂
Horrible advice for a happy relationship lol
Actually, not a bad advice at all. Sure it won't be a happy relationship until he shaves, but he will shave.
@GreenPenguin I qualified my answer for that reason. I assume people want a happy relationship, rather than just putting up with what they have.
@rjroy3 If she's unhappy with his beard it'll cause more unhappiness over timeand affect the relationship negatively.
It's kinda like leaving an old milk in the fridge. Right now it's somewhat unplesant to do something about, but if you don't do it now it'll be worse in the future. And if you never remove it it'll cause a bad environment for the rest of thestuff in the fridge.
@rjroy3 that would mean she would resent him secretly about it - that never works out well. It works both ways, he should care about what grosses her out.
true, but her hangup is less about the beard and more about the upkeep. She emphasized the points 1. dirty 2. scraggly with hairs getting into my mouth. Then said it was better when it was shorter. If he merely takes better care of his beard that solves both those issues.
That's disregarding the point that emotional manipulation, through using sex as a weapon in a relationship is a bad idea. Sure, just stop kissing him until he bends to whatever whim she wants without discussion or compromise of any kind on her end...
.
Even if she gets her way through doing that once. The relationship will end with decisions like that. He'll resent her for doing it, which is assuming he doesn't get into a fight over her trying to control his appearance.
Yes, he should care what grosses her out.
No, she shouldn't use kissing him/affection as a weapon to get what she wants.
No, cutting the beard is not the only solution for what's bothering her about the beard.
I say this as a currently clean shaven guy who often just goes with what my partner finds most attractive. If he really likes his beard. It's actually worse for her to try and force him to cut it, than for her to compromise and merely ask him to take better care of it. She already stated she's good with the beard. Just not a out of control, dirty beard which is reasonable.
@GreenPenguin poor example. Because the options aren't binary in this situation. I get what you're saying. My point is emotional manipulation is bad end if story and no it isn't a lesser evil. Nor is it a matter of 1. emotionally manipulate to get your way or 2. suffer in silence.
There are other options lol. That's flawed logic, tho very very common. We tend to look at things that way at times when both parties can win.
@rjroy3 he refuses to even do a trim and you think they can find a way to agree on it? He won't even clean it up a bit. Tell us what she does if he keeps on refusing it then? How are they ever going to agree on something, if he just refuses.
If it was me it would seriously gross me out and there's no way I'd kiss him so eh lol and I like beard, it's just gotta be properly maintained.
Going by what she said. She hasn't actually talked to him about taking care of his beard. Just stated she's grossed out by lack of cleanliness and it getting wiley. The only thing she stated she actually said to him was to cut the beard short.
A trim could just be trimming stray hairs and keeping the length. But yea, we can try and assume he wouldn't consider working with her on this. But why would we assume that? She never asked. Sure, he should know to clean his beard better. Him not having done so doesn't mean he wouldn't when its brought up that he should do better lol.
It's kind of like saying if someone texts at dinner that they'd never listen if you asked them to put their phone away. Because they should know better anyways and haven't done so already. Same logic.
@rjroy3 i didn't assume, she did ask him to trim and he got "irritated"
@rjroy3 Did we read the same question?
@GreenPenguin dont know what you read
I read the one where she asked him to at least upkeep it., the comment was meant at Rjroy3
Get him a beard kit that has a brush , comb , and beard oil his beard will look nicer , be softer and will shed less. There's some videos on YouTube on beard care and beard grooming
Otherwise make a bet with him on something that if he looses he has to shave or trim
But try a beard grooming kit
Or to get your point across don't shave your legs for 2 or 3 weeks and when he asks tell him it's comfortable or tell him you will shave when he does
I still recommend the beard kit maybe beard beads
Well if it bothers you that much then just leave him. Usually when a woman begins changing her SO, way down deep she is starting to venture off to another. You must have identified another male in your circle that has this and your mind is trying to fit the current SO to the one you desire in fact.
His beard wasn't like that when they got together, so it was him who changed first
@Melshmallow046 Then he will get tired of it and get rid of it on his own. I did it and I got tired of it and buzzed it. Sometimes just subtle hints of pulling away in a kiss or putting on an icky look face is more effective than brute force ultimatums. I certainly could take a hint and it would plant the idea in my head that maybe this thing "ain't" so cool. When you got out, simply notice a guy with the face you like and let him know you like it.
@Melshmallow046 OR maybe he is out on the prowl because he thinks some women like this.
Don't tell him to do something about his appereance, that's kind of like him saying 'you Have to shave your pussy or I won't eat it, or you have to shave in general or else I'm not okay with u', i mean you can't tell anyone what to do about themselves, it's his own fucking choice, he is his own person, and I'm SURE it doesn't kill u, so stop being such a brat and accept him for who he is, it's not that big of a deal.
Donāt shave your vagina and tell him you wanna grow it as long as his beard. 🤷🏻āāļø
Why do they dislike you? Haha
Lmao because their all for the beard to stay šš
A scraggly beard does look horrendous I agree, I suspect he is trying to grow it long.. But he needs thickness. Long thick beard takes time but you look good by slowly keeping it in shape as it grows.
I don't understand either. but somehow it's funny lol. sometimes he shaved it all. but sometimes he doesn't want and didn't want to listen to me. he prefers to look older than younger. I don't understand. sigh. he's 10 years older than me, when he shave m, I feel like we are same age, but when he doesn't shave it, i feel like dealing with some old man 🧔 feels like I'm with a guardian. 🤦🏻āāļø I think I'll shave him when he's sleeping
Give him an ultimatum. If he won't shave, you don't kiss him. If you have to live with that, so does he.
Blackmail. The best way to keep a relationship healthy.. and alive. (Sarcasm). Counter ultimatum: she accepts his beard or she leaves. Sounds better to me :)
What the fuck is wrong with you and every woman who upvoted this? This is why women complain about being single, because they do childish shit like that.
This is how you lose someone, not how you get them to do what you want. How about you approach the subject with maturity and not be bitchy about it?š¤ You have to strike a bargain with him. If you want him to shave, you're going to have to sacrifice something or do things he wants you to do.
Saying, "Cut your beard or I'll: break up with you, not have sex with you, or won't shave." Sounds a lot like what kids say, "if you don't do what I say I'm not gonna be your friend anymore." If you're saying things like that you shouldn't be in a relationship with anyone.
Tell him to maintain good health and cleanliness of his beard. Don't tell him to trim he's obviously not going that and he doesn't have to trim it for anyone.
Let him keep it for a while, I can almost promise that eventually shaving will enter his mind. A comedian said it best, I can't remember who; the only reason he said he grew his beard is because men dont have anything else left for themselves lol but its sorta true.
Tell him to shave that damn thing off there's nothing worse than a guy going down on you and you getting stabbed by all this freaking hair or when you're trying to kiss him and it just stab you in the face
It's up to him what he wants to do with his facial hair. How would you feel if he told you to shave your lips and you didn't want to (if you don't shave)?
See if you can both compromise but ultimately, it is his choice.
Stop shaving your legs, pits, your floofie, your lady mustache if you have one. Whatās good for the goose is good for for the gander. When he asks you why you stopped say ā let me look like a homeless personā. And laugh 😆 Iād shave
Lol, I bet that would stop the problem really quick.
Light greased lighting !
Like*. Hate autocorrect
Lol. I said the same. If this story was the reverse i wonder what the reaction would be. I should post in reverse. Girl quits shaving
Do it!
Geez. My man gets pretty rough and I'm curious for weeks of when he'll get a haircut and clean up his facial hair. He eventually do it or try if you ask rather politely a few times. But when he does, you have to reward him 💋
Like training a dog, when they behave you reward them! Positive reinforcement training!
Precisely.
tHoSe CrAzY nOrWeGiAnS
Itās similar to asking your girl to shave her legs if she doesnāt. If you canāt agree to a compromise and itās that big of a problem just leave him. No doubt it would be a stupid reason if you love each other. Otherwise you should accept him as he is