So... I'm 17 and I've never been asked out or anything...

Well, ok, I was asked out once or twice, but it was just some random guys at my school, so it might have been a joke. idk.

I don't think I'm ugly or anything; my hair's fine, and I'm in pretty good shape. I don't wear makeup, but whatever.

I have a handful of guy-friends that I'll talk with, and I think a couple of them might have liked me, but I'm not sure (I don't get to see some of them very often). I act naturally around them, so I don't make an effort to flirt or anything -I'm just me.

So what's the problem?

If some guys could explain anything here, that'd be great.

Hey, thanks for all the feedback people, it's been really helpful. ^^ I just needed to know if I did something wrong or if it as all in my head, and you've all cleared it up pretty well. Thank you. ^-^


Most Helpful Guy

  • If there is one thing that strikes me about human nature, it's reciprocation.

    Smile at someone and they're more likely to smile back at you. Laughter can be contagious, and so can be retaliation.

    Part of what guys find attractive about girls is the attention girls give them in the first place (that indicates they are interested). Because people fear rejection, they often communicate in more subtle means. Flirting is one such indirect means to show interest.

    The problem is likely that you haven't shown enough interest to guys you're interested in. Consequently, they either never get to know you or don't pursue you because they think you don't like them back.


Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 4

  • I'm sorry that you haven't been asked out yet for real (although, are you sure those guys were joking when they asked you? There may have been, and probably was, interest behind the question.) I do feel your pain though: I've yet to have a girlfriend and really am quite tired of being single.

    I think that you should try to get out there a little more and meet more guys. You don't have to ask them out right away or become best friends with them or anything, just meet them. Maybe one will pique your interest, and you theirs, and something will happen. Also, you can't always wait for the guy to make the first move. If you want something, go for it, so get out there and meet some guys. You don't have to do it alone either. Call up your girls and see if you can all go to a party together, then you can all meet guys (then there will be plenty of opportunity to gossip about that hot guy at the party haha). Being yourself is awesome, keep it up. Don't be afraid to flirt a little though, it can help a lot. Maybe your aren't naturally flirty. That's fine, but a guy may never realize you're interested if you don't flirt a little with him (and flirting is fun too, so why not do it?)

    • There was actually a girl's ask dance at my school a little while ago. I thought about asking someone (at the least, as friends) but never got around to it. The dance eventually got canceled though, because not enough people bought tickets.This happened last year too -they couldn't even pay or a DJ. I'm kinda glad I didn't bother with that one. x )

  • Patience. Not everything comes up to you in a silver platter. You said you don't wear makeup right? That tells me your not too flashy or too flirty, and those are usually the girls who get the most attention. Is that cruel? Yes. Fair? No. So what can I say to that? Well that your unique because you don't try to conform to the majority and rather stick to how you like yourself best. This makes you stand out, even if it doesn't get you many guys scrambling for your number. Your advantage is that every guy that sees you and ends up noticing you, is noticing the real you. Not something put on for show. Your much further ahead to find someone actually liking you for you, and not for some stereotypical reason. Take pride in that and enjoy high school. Your too young to be worrying about why you haven't dated. It will come, just not in the grand scale you might want. Just be patient.

  • Perhaps you should try flirting?

    Is there anyone in particular that you like, or are you just waiting for someone that likes you to ask you out?

    • Well the one guy I kinda like doesn't go to my school, so it's more like I'm waiting for someone to ask me for real. Even if it's not like a big deal or anything, just something in that general direction would be good, because now I feel a bit passed by, like there's some a list and I'm not on it.

  • Hun you're perfectly normal link


What Girls Said 2

  • Dont worry too much. I wasnt asked out until I was 18 years old. During high school I often got upset over the fact that had never had a boyfriend when it seemed like everyone around me had experienced a relationship. I wish someone had told me then how much it really didn't matter. Honestly, looking back, most of those high school relationships were nothing but for show. Good things come to those who wait, just always remember that. If you choose to go to college, you will probably be overwhelmed with lots of potential guys. They are much more mature, and usually college relationships mean more than any high school relationship. So really, the only problem your having is waiting. I know it may seem sometimes like you're waiting for forever, but one day it will happen. Until then, just live your life for you and make the most of it!

    • I did notice that actually; while my friends have gone out with guys a couple times, the relationships only last a week (at most) and one even ended with someone's hat being burned... I don't think either of them knew what they were angry over anyways, they were just dysfunctional...

  • didnt get a boyfriend until I was 16 nearly 17 plus he was a horrid first and it lasted about 2 weeks. I think you are perfectly fine. only thing I have to say is if you like a guy try and make it very obvious like with looking at him talking etc. all I've learned is that guys are just as scared to enter relationships and need to be sure they are walking into a more than likely yes.