Ah, men from all levels of attractiveness, personalities, and professions know it well. Every so often that perfect girl falls into your lap...things go well and then they don't. Before you know it, she's talking down to you and you're taking it like a wimp. You're aware of it, but she's just so your type you can't help but go along with it. Such are integral parts of:
CRUSHING ON A GIRL WHO DOESN'T LIKE YOU
Since this take is so specific to the maze that is male logic, I will write in question answer format, so as to address the many counter arguments bred out of our societal teaching to chase instead of discover.
The Every Guy: She's so hot...and so smart. She would love my humor...she would! She just doesn't know me well enough. I just need to show her.
Wrong, buddy...The problem is she isn't interested in getting to know you, and deep down you know the reason why. It isn't about you...it's about your PERCIEVED VALUE. You aren't high value enough for her to want to get to know you. The reason for this is for another Take. But, don't think that people don't percieve value of others. There are girls you are interested in talking to and other's who don't interest you at all. You are assigning value personal to your own tastes. This is not wrong. They are entitled to their tastes as you are your own. You wouldn't think it right for a girl to say: How dare you don't like me?! You think you're better than me?! No, so neither should you.
Yep...
The Every Guy: Dude, I'm afraid that if I don't get this girl I will feel like I can't get girls that attract me as much as she does.
Ah, fear. Fear drives us more than any other emotion. The fear of death keeps us alive. Yet, fear has its downsides. Think about it this way, from the mindset that you have something to prove...then if you get her you will still feel like you have something to prove and that means you won't feel like you deserve her. You can't just go "I win" and it be over. The point is you felt, at one time, that you were lower and needed to prove something to go higher. That point of view doesn't change just because your circumstances do...at least not for long. After you enjoy a nice honeymoon period, the thought will creep...do I deserve her? Is she too good for me? Is another guy better for her? Don't listen to your fear.
So wrong, so true.
The Every Guy: I have feelings for her. I could be an awesome boyfriend. It's happened before man...remember that girl? I saw her, I worked on her for months and I got her.
Past tense: got. You're glorifying a system that continues to punish you day in and day out. Play it as long as you want...play it as hard as you want...you'll still lose. That girl with the fake tits and the mini skirt that makes her look like she has an ass has got more "power" in this system than you do if you have a PhD. It's the ladder system. The girl you want is at the tippy top. You keep climbing thinking you'll reach it, but something always comes to push you down every time you're making progress. You must abandon this system in favor of a new system. This system is a system where you only involve yourself with girls where there is a mutual attraction FROM THE START. Not you like her a lot and she likes you a little and then she warms up to you...FROM THE DAMN START. This is what you are. This is what you deserve. This system is human. Your old system is egotistic and mysoginistic if you're a guy.
That bitch status though...
The Every Guy: So, what will get me through...when I meet this amazing girl and she's not really that into me but will talk to me every so often...how do I stop myself from trying?
You have to believe that you're worth it. You have to believe an amazing girl is out there who actually just wants you. Believe that god damn you. Stop thinking only sluts and "average" girls want you right away. Are the girls you want right away slut? No? They're actually pretty smart, well dressed, interesting, funny, etc. etc? Right. Have hope, brothers. Go out there and meet women with no expectations, but to explore the world around you...your Queen is coming.
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