Before I start I feel a bit of context is necessary: I'm born and raised Californian, having spent a period of my time living in Washington and New Mexico before moving back to California before I was 13. At 19 I enlisted in the Navy as the town I was living in at the time did not offer me the training I desired. Every command I went to spent excessive amounts of time on sexual harassment seminars, mandatory reading, and carried out extreme punishments for sailors who didn't put their careers first. Usually they were processed out or given non judicial punishment. I personally witnessed E-7's and E-8's get kicked out for cheating on their spouses with each other while on deployment. Being in an integrated Navy was always more difficult due to the stress of having to serve with females while never being able to show interest in them without consequences. The constant threat of not completing my enlistment and receiving an honorable discharge loomed over my head even more so than the average sailor because of my sign on bonus. If I did not complete the terms of my contract the Navy was going to take it back, I wouldn't be able to find a job and pretty much end up homeless. The Navy did leave me homeless but that's another story.
The education system I was brought up into did not give me a good early understanding of how to approach women, something I had to learn later on. There were a few times that I was surrounded by extremist feminists (being a kid I didn't know they held extreme viewpoints) who taught us boys that we were the rapists, the abusers, that hitting a girl is never okay (but what about if she hits you? What, how am I a misogynist and what is that?), their patriarchal views on society, the works. I had some crazy teachers and when you're an impressionable young child being trapped in a room with an androgyny that actually hates men so much she went full lesbian... Well I fail to see that as anything but indoctrination. At campuses everywhere you will see the banners popup every so often if they are not prevalent already, posters where men are abusers, the violent ones, the one's doing harm. Women are flawless and incapable of these things apparently.
I really feel like the training I've been given is in complete disparity to the reality I've experienced. Women can be abusive. Women can inflict severe emotional pain because they know exactly the right thing to say to get under the skin. They are much better at this than men, we may pull a good biting remark once in awhile when emotional but women take the cake in that regard. Women are better communicators due to their neurochemistry, they are better biologically wired to discern inter-personal relationships.
IMHO this results in women shit testing men constantly. Label me egotistical but I find people that shit test ignorant as to how to properly get to know a person. Being direct and finding qualities or traits that attractive is a much better way to attract a well balanced person versus a douschebag. Women don't seem to realize this however and the majority waste their time on relationships that suck because they didn't adequately vette that person before they became an item. To me this is a red flag that she's dumb, doesn't know what she wants, and I will avoid the majority of women because of this.
Direct women that approach me, get my attention, and are forward enough to make their intentions known are the only types I even consider anymore. My time consists of mostly professional work when I'm not fucking off on video games. I won't waste my time on females that treat me as disposable, either she see's my value or I'll continue spending my time alone because my time with myself is amazing. I am too busy for her bullshit or games.
Too busy being Pie Man.
So for me it isn't worth approaching. The chance that at some point I'm going to have to walk away because she can throw a false sexual harassment claim, rape, or some other baseless argument at me and it will be believed because she is a woman makes me not want to give up control of my life. I don't have kids, alimony, any bad former relationships, divorce, or anything holding me back. I plan to keep it that way until I know for damned sure, 100% without a doubt that she is interested and I'm the only guy for her because everything else is bullshit in a bullshit society with too many double standards for men and zero accountability for women.
I've made this anonymous because I don't trust this community.
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