+1 y

I am addicted to my "friend with benefits", had unprotected sex, and could you men give me advice?

ok I have been seeing this guy for about 8 months now. he is very honest and straight forward, sometimes a little too straight forward. we get along great when together, but in the begining he told me from the get go he didn't want a relationship. Told me about his previous girlfriends and how they cheated on him. He said he wanted to be " selfish" right now in life and concentrate on himself. by this time we were already intimate, and I thought I could hide my feelings from him and be in a friends with benefits relationship. to make a long story short feelings got a lot stronger. now I can't stop thinking bout him

he has admitted that he understands how I feel and that he understands that sometimes you can't control falling for someone. I kinda told him that when I am with other guys all i can think about is being with him. He blushed and thought it was cute. He told me he really cares for me but he is just not in the mindset for a relationship. he is like it takes time, devotion, you have to work thru problems, blah blah, its work. And that when he is ready for a girlfriend he will find one.

Ok the problem is while he is telling me all of this he kinda gives me mixed signals. when we are intimate he always initiates cuddling, kissing. Sometimes he opens up to me and then just kinda pulls away ( telling me how he feels etc). Then he'll reference me in the future as if he plans to have me in his life months , years down the road. He has even made references to marriage saying " if I asked you to marry me you would know you would say yes". I don't know maybe he was kidding.

when he acts or says these things it confuses me and draws me closer to him. He's like a darn drug, and I am addicted.

even when I tell him I am getting attached he continues to draw me in, but occassionally back off. just making me feel like I mean more to him then a friend/ or sex partner. its confusing.

he'll call me just to hang out when he has time. he is actually a pretty busy guy.he travels a whole lot for business ( always going to conferences in other cities and visiting his family every other week in NY which is an 9 hr drive) and works full time at the hospital as a nurse. From the first time we were intimate he told no matter how goregous the girl, he always straps up for safety. And for the 8 months we played it safe with condoms. says he doesn't want any children out of wedlock. but the other night I don't know what happened, we started kissing and making out and we had unprotected sex. ( I know I know, that's really bad)

ok guys, seriously, I need to know what I need to do right now. part of me wants to back off, but another part thinks this is the right guy for me but he just needs a little time. I just don't know what to do. Someone give me GOOD advice before I make a mistake and end up heart broken.
I am addicted to my "friend with benefits", had unprotected sex, and could you men give me advice?
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