Should you just stay friends if you’re physically attracted to one another but can't see yourself getting sexual with eachother?

[DizzyDesii]

So the guy I mentioned on my other post… I’ve always found him incredibly attractive. Gosh his smooth dark chocolate skin, bulging arms, cute little nose, lovely thick brows, adorable smile, nice firm American football ass etc. He’s always been attracted to me too and even nicknamed me “Little Bit” back in HS to show appreciation for my little booty 😆 But more than anything he’s always adored my goofy playful personality.

He remembers important facts about my life and we’ve always had a lot in common in terms of our interests— theme parks, religion, casinos, wrestling, music, shows, sports, etc. He’s always treated me nicely. My moms always liked him for me and his aunt was even married to my uncle so the fam knows him (but we’re not related). I even love how his voice goes from a bit deep and manly to randomly cracking when i say something that surprises him. The only dealbreaker was when he wanted to work as a male stripper but luckily he never went through with that.

Even though he's always been into me in return, I don't know if i could see us gettin freaky. He used to try to kiss me and I’d always shy away but gosh I adored his hugs. His height always bothered me because I’m 5’2 and he’s like 6’4 or 6’5 and thats a turnoff to me. I don’t even think my head reached his chest. So I don't know i always saw his sneak attacks coming plus its hard to imagine kissing someone so tall. I’ve been dreaming about him a few times a month since last summer and they always have us saving one another from freak accidents.

Anyways, should I just leave it at friends if i dont know if i can see us getting physical? I mean I’m not going to act on anything while in a relationship with this other guy anyways, but maybe this is why I’ve always bounced my friend back into the friendzone. Im scared of us not being sexually compatible even though one dream said otherwise. I see romance but not passion #FeelFreeToList

[Extraterrestrial1999]

You gotta go for him. I know you don't want to feel like took two steps back, by calling it off with one person, for another person, just for it to possibly not even work out, however, I always say if you're not sure about your current relationship deep into it, it's probably not meant to me. If your physically attracted to the other man, and have been for a while, go, even if you can't envision the dirty part, it'll come naturally. Like on the first date let's say, if you already think he's overly attractive, and still you feeling him, by the time that first date's over, you'll probably have to contain yourself from ripping his shirt off, in the car lol.

[DizzyDesii]

Haha good point

[Wiredone]

If I was in your situation, minus the current boyfriend, I'd give it a try. Go on a few dates. See how things go. Just tell him that you don't want to ruin the friendship you both have together. You might be surprised at how compatible you both are. It's better to try and fail than to end up saying " what if" for the rest of your life.

[DizzyDesii]

Oooo makes sense cause we’ve been un what if node for like 14 years

[DizzyDesii]

*in what if mode

[Wiredone]

Do you want to stay in what if or do you want to take him for a test drive.

[DizzyDesii]

I’ve never been interested in test driving anyone, not sexually anyways

[Wiredone]

Test driving the relationship to see if it would work out

[DizzyDesii]

Oh 😆

[Wiredone]

Thank you for the mho

[Finchie40]

As much as it sounds that you 2 would probably be a great match romantically, it’s probably best just to remain friends and not cross those lines of getting intimate together , just because you said you don’t feel the passion for him , without passion , you really don’t have anything and it could definitely ruin your friendship if you did choose to cross those lines . It’s definitely a cross road and a tough decision because they always say it’s best to get into a relationship with someone that is your best friend but sadly it’s a 50/50 chance on whether it will work or not. I have been in that situation before with girls’ that I just considered friends and I crossed those lines with some of them and sadly those girls’ are now longer in my life because we chose to take it to the next level instead of just remaking friends , the sex was amazing at the time but we eventually realized we were better off as friends. My thing is once you are in a friend zone with someone just remain in the friend zone , only continue with someone if the passion is there right from the start , when passion is there from the start that’s someone you should take your chances with over someone you are unsure with from the beginning , I hope that made sense lol

[DizzyDesii]

But how can you feel passion off the bat with someone? We have chemistry. i just haven't felt sexual towards him. He has such a handsome face and sexy body but i never thought about riding his dick lmao

[Finchie40]

Ask yourself why you don’t want to ride his dick? If you are that attracted to him what is stopping you from wanting to ride his cock lol? Because of his height? Most girls l’ love being with a guy she feels safe and protected by , Most girls’ love being submissive to a man that she feels she can look up to? So what is the main reason why you just want him as a friend? Just goes to show the difference between guys and girls’ If I am friends with a girl that I find absolutely gorgeous and beautiful to my eyes , my dick is going to want to be inside her lol

[Finchie40]

He sounds like your knight in shining armor Desi , you and I been friends on here for a long time , and I know you and I have a lot in common because we are Aquarius’s So what is stopping you from being in this guys’ arms lol

[DizzyDesii]

Its because i dont care for sex like that. I have to love someone and built up towards sexual stuff to want to have sex with them. I’ve never just wanted him as a friend. We’ve both always wanted more. I just haven't tried cause if it gets awkward and we breakup then i can't be his friend anymore either. I’d like to say my current boyfriend is stopping me from being in his arms 😆 but even before i started dating this guy, i kept postponing things with my friend and we def almost went on a date last July

[Finchie40]

Ok well since you are already involved with someone else then you are best to distance yourself from this other guy out of respect for your relationship. How would you feel if your boyfriend had an attractive female friend that he was curious about as well? Desiring temptations is important if you want your relationship to be to last the long haul , I know at times it’s hard but you have to treat your partner the same way you want then treating you.

[Finchie40]

Denying temptations my bad

[DizzyDesii]

Did you not read the stuff i said at the very top of the page lol. I am distancing myself but not hanging out with him. But my relationship is on the fence rn and im just saying if i ended up single again, i might go for it

[Finchie40]

My bad lol , We are so much alike it’s sick lol Us Aquarians are great lovers but when a partner crosses the lines in the relationship and makes us feel on edge , you better be prepared for what we do next lol I am going through the same shit with my wife now that I shockingly gave another chance with , I made it clear to her if she doesn't stop being selfish , she will see my selfishness shine , don’t think there isn’t another girl waiting to be in my arms lol i will only be faithful if she stays faithful to me , if not there’s the door and don’t let it hit ya in the ass on the way out. Lol

[Finchie40]

I am still in shock with myself for giving her another chance , usually I don’t give second chances , but I been going through so much shit in my life this past year and she is the mother of my children , that was begging for me back ever since I busted her having an emotional affair with her co worker that I finally caved in and said fine , prove to me you love me , and prove to me you never slept with him , and she proved it to me Shockingly she said she never slept with anyone else when she was with me. So that’s why I gave her another chance. If she didn’t prove it to me then I would t of taken her back , I take relationships seriously but the second you fuck up it’s over. Is Aquarians don’t like Sucker written on our heads lol

[DizzyDesii]

Woooow i can't believe you gave her another chance. You missed the pussy huh? Lol

[Finchie40]

Yea it was great for a while but now turning to shit again , maybe time for a new pussy lol

[DizzyDesii]

How can you keep playing with marriage like this? Were y'all never divorced? Cause if not you were still technicslly married and committing adultery with your little girlfriends

[Finchie40]

Legally we are still married but cuz we both decided not to go through a divorce , we basically separated without going through all the legal nonsense of money. We both agreed to take time apart and reflect on our own lives and agreed to be there for the kids , We acted like mature adults in a friendly way , and promised to be honest with each other , She knows I dated other girls and I told her she can date other guys as well , she claims she doesn’t want anyone else but me but understands her and I don’t see eye to eye on a lot of things , I still love and care about her , we were married for a long time , I think has time went on we both lost the passion for each other , She knows my love language is touch and I told her if I get serious with another girl I promise to end it completely with her , I know it sounds crazy , but as much as we both know we aren’t really good for each other her and I are still friends and care about each other. I don’t want to bash her whatso ever but the reason we drifted apart is because she became very selfish once our kids got older , she started distancing herself from me and barely ever wanted to be intimate with me anymore , it got to a point I was pretty much begging her for intimacy and affection , part of me thinks she’s bi sexual or asexual , her and I had a lot of serious talks together and come to an agreement to take things slow , because she knew she fucked up. I have told her to move on but she says she doesn’t want anyone else , I told her i do, I want to feel loved and wanted. So her and I agreed to just remain friends and live our lives , she met a girlfriend that part of me feels she is fooling around with , she invests a lot of her time and energy into this girl , I have asked her of she is more than just friends with this girl and she denies it every time , my gut thinks otherwise. I told her just to be honest with me and for some reason she can’t when it comes to that girl , I think because that girl is

[Finchie40]

Married as well and doesn’t want to cause any conflict with her husband. I know this sounds crazy but it’s honestly the truth. My wife won’t give me a straight answer , she goes away with trips with this girl and makes it clear just the 2 of them are going , I am not allowed to go with them , another Red Flag , I told her I don’t want to be in a relationship with a girl that needs to exclude me from vacations etc. I want a girl that wants to experience things together and work together. My wife did a huge 369 on me ever since my kids got older , almost like she was faking this whole marriage with me , She is not the same person , she is still caring and nice to me but I don’t feel she is really in love with me , if she is , she has a damn weird way of showing it , she is definitely a broken person , she had a horrible upbringing , so I feel she can’t live like a normal person loves. She doesn’t want to hurt my feelings cuz she knows I am a nice guy with a big heart , she tells me all the time I am the best guy she has ever been with , I ask her why can’t you love me that way then? She said she does t know , So I just been focusing on myself and not really looking for another relationship or a marriage , I am pretty much over all of it unless I meet a girl that is really in it for the long haul , most girls’ I meet are just in it for the short that lie to me saying they want long. My life has been absolutely crazy this past year and I feel so lost , Why I just been focusing on my own self and focusing on my kids and trying to start up a brewery business with my brother and best friend, I told my wife she can either join me or go her separate ways , Her and I are more Friends then anything at this point , We still have sex on occasion but very rarely , only when she is in the mood , it’s just sex but nothing more. I want more , so I guess her and I are both selfish people now , we don’t hate each other just know we aren’t great for each other if that makes sense

[DizzyDesii]

But if you’re religious (which I don't know if you are) then you’ll realize this is still adultery if you’re not full on divorced. So how you gonna call me adulterous 😆

[Finchie40]

I am not calling you adulterous what so ever , I am just saying don’t string someone’s heart along for your own selfish benefit. Kind of what my wife is doing to me. I have religious beliefs when it comes to God and marriage but I am no Holy roller , I been nothing but honest with my wife , it’s her that I don’t feel is being honest with me , She sadly can’t give herself completely to me so I told her I can’t do the same for her because there is things she isn’t telling me. She is ok if I screw other girls ‘ she tells me just don’t fall in love , I said I can’t promise you that , if I fall in love I am filing for the divorce completely , I think it turns her on when another girl wants me , crazy to say , I told her it does t hurt your feelings knowing I am with another girl , she said not really she said it will hurt her feelings if I fell in love with another girl , my wife is sadly very broken and I told her to go get help , Her selfishness is speaking louder than words , I told her I am perfectly ok if she wants to be with that girl , she won’t give me a straight answer , like she is embarrassed by it or trying to cover up for her girlfriend , part of me wants to call her girlfriends husband and ask him some questions as well, which I already did somewhat , sadly I think her husband is cheating on his wife as well , from the stories I hear , I just stay out of it and tell my wife do what you want , I am over the fucking drama

[Finchie40]

People have changed it seems to me , ever since social media really became thing , people have lost their fucking minds , mine included with all the shit I read and hear about and experienced , I am just focusing on positive as much as i can , I feel this world has gone to hell in a hand basket by the way people are treating each other , it’s disgusting what this society has become. I know I am not perfect but what I grew up to believe with love and marriages is sadly not the same today , people are cheating on each other left and right like it’s all of a sudden ok to do , not caring about STD’s and AIDS anymore , i can’t just stick my dick into some random girl , I have to feel chemistry and connection and attraction and feel the girl has good morals for me to even consider having sex with her , some of the girls’ I have dated recently were all fucking liars , selfish liars just like my wife is crazy to say, I think that’s why I gave her another chance , it seems all girls are this way these days I hate to sound negative but from my experiences this is all I see right in front of y face , I want to believe true love exists but sadly with this selfish society it’s very hard to find

[Finchie40]

So I am being selfish as well and focusing on my own happiness , I am tired of games and drama , life is too short to dwell on negative energy , if the whole world wants to have an orgy I guess I have no other chance but to join , who knows, it seems people have lost their minds , It seems Nobody really focused on religion anymore they just use it as an excuse for their selfish actions my wife claims she is a Christian but she doesn’t show it what so ever only when it’s convenient for her , I am at a point Indont think I want to be married ever unless I find a girl that c’s eye to eye with me , Which sadly is hard to find , I just know my life is already half way over and I have to find my happiness , I am not giving a fuck about a lot of things anymore , I told my wife you either be by my side or leave , I am over the drama , You want to go be a dyke go be a fucking dyke , I don’t care , Yes I love sex , sex makes me feel amazing , makes me feel alone , makes me feel closer to the girl I am with , that’s how God made me , I want a girl that only wants sex with me and nobody else , I have not met a girl that thins that way , I thought my wife was that girl until she became selfish , I am not a fucking punching bag my heart will give to someone that gives the same in return , it won’t give to someone that isn’t , You want to be FWB’s with me Be Honest!! Why is it so so hard for people to be honest? I only fuck honest girls’ I am over the lying and backstabbing life is too short for misery anymore , My wife knows I love her but she knows she can’t give me what I am after , it’s like all girls want their cake and want to eat it to these days , God sends broken girls to me for some reason like I am supposed to fix them and save them , I am over that shit when is it my turn lol

[DizzyDesii]

I also have to be emotionally connected and in a longterm relationship with someone to get physical. I may be slightly emotionally wrapped up in old feelings for my friend but i’m still all about my boyfriend. I don’t believe in physical cheating and emotional is just something that is a bad habit at times. I feel he's selfish in many ways so thats why im now trying to lookout for me too and prepare myself for if we’re not together anymore. I won't even hang with my friend guy but i know if my guy and i dont make it, im gona start hanging out with my friend and see where things go. I wish you’d jusr divorce this lady because its still adultery regardless of giving eachother permission to cheat. I wouldn't even allow myself to cheat emotionally if i were married but just being boyfriend/girlfriend is a different level. Marriage is a pedestal and if you’re not happy i wish you’d just leave. If y'all decided to fck around from time to time after, so be it. But you deserve to be done with her and happy with someone else

[Finchie40]

Yes I agree and that’s what we spoke about and agreed upon , like I said I don’t hide anything from her , i. Tell her everything , we are just mutual with everything when it comes to our marriage , I told her I will completely file for divorce if I end up meeting a girl that is in it for the long haul , she agreed to do the same , we just aren’t filing the divorce officially mainly cuz of finances , , My wife knows she can file at anytime , an I can as well , our marriage is just a piece of paper at this time it really means nothing , we are both being selfish and taking time apart to reflect on ourselves , we tell each other everything we just promise not to present it in front of the kids until we know for sure what we want to do , she knows I am seeking true love and she knows she isn’t capable of fully giving that to me , She said she would like to but she has her own issues she wants to handle first , She tells me all the time that she wants me to be happy that she knows I deserve to be treated right , she admitted ahead can’t give that to me now , she says she has her own problems to deal with , we are mutual with everything kind of Like Demi Moore and Bruce Willis marriage , they were mutual for the kids sake , we both love each other but we both want different things , we can’t predict the future but we both know we want happiness , Her and I are better now then we ever were by being honest with each other

[DizzyDesii]

Yea but separation is bullshit. When married, you are supposed to not sleep with others. Thats why i was saying y'all may as well divorce since its “open” Anyways. For me, its not about hiding anything. If we marry, we can't be fckin with anyone else. We are not married and we are still not fcking around. But i have made my habit of securing a backup and he actually had phone sex with someone before we were fully official despite claiming we were exclusive. I cannot forget that and i struggle to trust that he won't do it again. The fact he no longer sees longterm makes me feel he's seeked a backup too but hasn't said so. I don't know but i will continue to secure my spot but to try to hold back on flirting out of respect for my relationship

[Finchie40]

I agree separating is bullshit , , we officially broke up first, i ended it with her when I busted her with that co worker , I initially filed for divorce , we just didn’t go completely forward with it , i wasn’t screwing other girls’ when we were officially together , she pretty much cheated first , so I kicked her out of the house , she ended up moving back in with her Mom , we were t together after that for a few years , during those few years I have dated other girls ‘ my wife and I were still talking and I told her I no longer want to be with her , she begged and begged for me back but I didn’t give into her , i couldnt forget what she did to us. Even though we weren’t together I was still honest with her about what I was doing , She knew when I started dating again and I told her I met someone else , I told her the truth about everything , I wanted to file completely but due to financial reasons we decided not to go down that road right away , we have kept in touch the whole time we were apart mainly for the kids sake , I didn’t let her back into my life until this past year , I am not seeing anyone , the girl I thought I was going to be with turned out to be a liar as well , so I ended it with her. Shortly after that my Older brother passed away and then 3 months after that my Mom passed , my life was spiraling downhill from there , My wife was by my side during that time , another reason I gave her another chance , Things with her and I started to get better and she told me she is in love with me and swore to me she did nothing with that co worker , I made her prove it to me and she did but I still have my doubts but it’s in the past now , On top of the my wife has come down with health issues so I been there for her as well thinking it’s the right thing to do , We agreed to take things slow and agreed to be open , we also agreed if we do decide to be fully back together we will renew our vowels , We both have issues to deal with on our own

[Finchie40]

I am not running around screwing other girls’ I talk to other girls and been on some dates but nothing serious , my wife knows everything , Woth her health condition she told me she doesn’t think she has much longer to live , why she asked me not to fall in love with anyone else but she is ok if I have sex and find a FWB’s Intokdnher I can’t promise her I won’t fall in love with someone else , if it happens it happens , She just wants me by her side if she passes away , I know this sounds crazy but it’s the truth , She can’t give me what I want and I can’t give her what she wants , so we decided just to be friends and take things slow with barely any strings attached , No matter what happens with her and I I promised her I will be by her side if she is on. Her death bed.

[DizzyDesii]

Im sorry to hear about her health

[Rosexøxø]

AWoaaaaa the last line sis that was good.

i can’t answer this because i blanked out and the LAST LINE.

LAST. LINE.

🚨

I feel like it sums up a lot of tough scenarios with close guy friends and some dating partners.

It gets a bit tricky between romance and passion, and sometimes a lady likes both? 🤷‍♀️

At least I know I have. It’s a tough call, though.

[Rosexøxø]

Sometimes you love them but don’t want to be naked with them

And sometimes you want to be naked with them but they don’t really care about you or love you back :\\

They don’t like get you 100%

[Rosexøxø]

It’s tricky finding an in between or settling or being reasonable maybe for one that seems more important.

[Rosexøxø]

Balancing can always be an option too as long as it isn’t advantageous.

Like if he sees you as a friend too then friends- it’s mutual.

If not then you’re breaking his heart :[

[Rosexøxø]

I hope you find what makes you happy too. I feel like happiness and satisfaction are TWO different things in some cases.

They’re distinct.

And some times we’re lucky when they’re synonymous/ in the same sentence/ or match up for the same one person 🤷‍♀️

[DizzyDesii]

This why i hate im not into open relationships. I always meet someone who fulfills the physical and someone else who fulfills the mental stinulation 😂

[RoseySarah]

You can't be just friends! Your mind won't allow it neither will your body!

[DizzyDesii]

My body might cause i never just wanted to jump his bones. He is too tall of a tree to climb 😂

[jennifer_bloom]

I’ve always hated the idea of sex due to my fears of child birth and would be happy in a sexless relationship.

[Oliverlogan263]

I mean, you can definitely still be friends even if there's physical attraction but no sexual chemistry imagined. Seems like y'all got a real strong connection and care about each other, so no need to throw that away!

That said, I feel you on the height thing potentially being weird if things got intimate. But who knows, maybe once you both really connected emotionally, little stuff like that wouldn't matter in the moment. Attraction isn't always logical.

If I was you, I'd stay friends for now while you figuring stuff out with this other dude. But maybe don't completely rule out more with your boy down the line either. Feelings can change or grow over time as folks get to know each other better.

Keep it light and fun between y'all. If anything changes on your end where you start seein him that way, let him know casual. But no pressure - friendship is real too. Just sayin, I've seen odder pairings work out before! As long as y'all vibe, that's what counts.

[DizzyDesii]

Yea we always vibed emotionally, i just never seeker anything physical with him

[Oliverlogan263]

For sure, emotional connection is way more important than just physical stuff anyway. It sounds like you really get each other on a deep level, and that's not something you find every day.

I can totally see why the physical side of things never felt right, with the height difference and all that. But it's cool that you were still able to have an awesome friendship despite being attracted to each other. Not every guy would be mature enough to separate those feelings.

I'd say don't worry too much about labeling it or figuring out what could've been. Just be glad you have someone who really gets you as a friend. The emotional connection you have is way more meaningful in the long run. Who knows, maybe down the track your feelings will change as you both mature and stuff. But for now, sounds like you made the right call staying buddies.

Keep appreciating what you have, and don't ruin it by stressing over the "what ifs". Friendship like that is way too dope to lose over something that may never happen anyway. You're both young - I'm sure you'll meet other people and your views on relationships will keep evolving. But this friend will always have your back no matter what.

[DizzyDesii]

Yea i just Adore him and i can tell he adores me Too. It feels so innocent

[Oliverlogan263]

It really is so amazing when you can have that kind of close friendship with someone, where there's just such a deep care and appreciation for each other. To be able to adore someone platonically like that is such a beautiful thing.

You can just tell how much you both value your friendship - like there's this unspoken understanding and respect between you. Even with the attraction being there too, you've managed to keep it so pure and innocent. It's awesome that you can express your feelings for each other without things ever having to get weird or messy.

I'm kinda envious of what you've got honestly! Too often friendships between guys and girls can get complicated by other stuff. But it sounds like you're both able to just enjoy each other's company and be there to support each other through everything. That kind of bond is so rare and precious.

Just keep nurturing it and don't doubt how much you clearly mean to each other. Friends that truly "get" you on that deep a level are hard to find. Cherish what you have together - it's really special the way you can adore each other in this innocent, caring way. I'm happy for you guys!

[DizzyDesii]

I was falling into depression last night cause of how stupid my dude was being and my friend was like “cheer up beautiful. We about to talk this through because im not about to watch you go out like that.”
He so sweet. y'all all are
😩

[SamIam96]

The dude is into you. You're into him. Why wouldn't you give it a try? He might be the Clark Kent of passion.

How will you feel if he gets serious with someone and you wonder if you could have been great with him?

[DizzyDesii]

Well thats last paragraph has been the story of our life for the last 14 years. When we really are ready to give it a go, one of us is taken. And that is the case again. Im taken this time

[SamIam96]

I remember you mentioning him in the past. He's captured your imagination. I'm hoping the planets align for you two.

[DizzyDesii]

You’re right but deep down im hoping things work with my current guy

[loveslongnails]

I have limited personal experience with this, so combined with my observations, I believe this is what happens on the male side of things:

**** If a guy is into you and wants the whole deal, but you don't see getting physical with him, he will stick around because he likes you, but also because he holds out "hope" that you'll change your mind and want it all with him. However, that will change if he finds a new crush or someone he's hot for that will reciprocate his feelings and desires. Usually when it does, the behavior change comes as a bit of a shock when he re-focuses on the new girl.

Has that ever happened to you?

[DizzyDesii]

Yea I've been through that before. Its not that i dont want to be with physical with him. I just never envisioned it

[NathanDavis]

I've made it work before... we

but we saw each other as very attractive, and we had some chemistry... we just didn't entertain that attraction at the moment, and then we got over it

we were able to value so many other things about one another

[DizzyDesii]

Thats the thing tho. We are attracted to eachother physically. We’ve had chemistry for over 10 years. Our feelings just come/go because i keep postponing thing. We value a lot about one another. I just never considered sexual acts with him

[NathanDavis]

well... what about him? do you know if he's been considering this long? or maybe recently

[DizzyDesii]

he's wanted a relationship with me since 9th or 10th grade. I don't know when sexual dreams started for him but we didn't admit them until last summer before i got in a relationship. He was pretty disappointed i got with someone else when we finally had good timing and were both single. But im afraid of not seeing myself get sexual with him down the road and so i hate to risk the friendship. I def see myself with him romantically i just dk about sexually

[NathanDavis]

definitely not a good idea... if there's not true desire and passion for it... it won't be worth it

[DizzyDesii]

I’ve always felt a desire for him romantically but i’ve never thought about what he looked like “down there” lmao. I mean my dream last year was the first time where i was like… well damn

[NathanDavis]

romantic indeed... if there's no sexual idealization

[Joshydavid25]

Yeah, while you are in a relationship the only thing he can be is your friend honestly.. But you should have just bypassed that "I can't think of getting freaky with him" and see if it would have worked out.. Some feelings don't come instantly, and y'all already damn near love each other.. But alas, you are with somebody so might as well squash it..

[DizzyDesii]

Yea i wasn't gonna do anything while in a relationship. And yea feelings have always been there i just never considered sexual
feelings

[Joshydavid25]

Of course, and well so far your sexual feelings haven't lead you to any rainbow.. 😂.. No need to pass up a good guy just cause at the moment, you feel weird about doing the deed with him.. I mean if you were single of course..

[DizzyDesii]

I wasn't into the 3 i had sex with sexually. I didn't even see myself dating them when i met them lmao

[DizzyDesii]

They grew on me

[Joshydavid25]

Exactly, and you could've been in a long lasting relationship with ol big boy if you followed the same principle.. LOL..

[DizzyDesii]

Probably since we were actually friends first and have a lot in common

[Joshydavid25]

Those are the best honestly..

[DizzyDesii]

Not normally to me because if we end i lost two things

[Joshydavid25]

SMH, maybe you could've been with a highs sweetheart and married with children by now.. But you mucking it up Desii.. 😂.. Hopefully this current guy is on business.

[Joshydavid25]

Highschool sweetheart**..

[DizzyDesii]

Well see this guy and i started talking again around June or July. I asked him something about kids and i forgot his answer but it was disappointing. So then August i got with my guy. So I don't know if i’d get a baby out of either

[Joshydavid25]

Lmao.. Geez.. Well with men they really gotta feel it I guess.. I mean Not once have I gotten a girl to ask me about kids.. SMH..

[DizzyDesii]

Which is odd cause we’re at that age

[Joshydavid25]

This generation and the next sucks when it comes to responsibility and becomes parents.. LOL.. So I guess that would explain it..

[DizzyDesii]

Not in my opinion. I think our gen has done pretty good and are less abusive than our parents gen. I think the generation after us is pretty fcked up and ruining kids at a young age

[Joshydavid25]

I don't know I've seen the complaints about how millennials parents and how Gen Alpha is turning out already.. Just a bunch of brats listening to Pound Town, and not listening to adults, and feeling havoc.. Lmao..

[CandyLandAm3ircan]

Lack Of Honesty
Tension Miscommunication
Overall Is Just Back & Forth
Mind Games

Waste Of Time

Stop Hiding Ur Feelings
Just Speak Up
Let Them Know
Or Them Go

And forget it, Move On

Don't Try Making It Work
If u Think u
Want Nothing More
To Happen
But Can't Fully Stick With It

No One Foot In One Foot Out

Sort Ur Feelings, No Mix Signals please

[DizzyDesii]

Of course

[TommyMountainFigure]

There is nothing wrong with having friends of the opposite sex, but dreaming about someone else when you are married isn't good, even if you say to yourself nothing will ever happen! The temptation will always be there methinks!

[DizzyDesii]

Im not married. I wouldn't even put myself in the position to think about another guy while married

[RavVid]

If you were free why not? I've seen lots of 5' girls marry with 6' 6" guys. I get the physical concerns but it seems to have worked out.

The biggest drawback is having to look up at your son from maybe 7 on wards.

[DizzyDesii]

Lol you really think the kid would get his height? Haha

[RavVid]

From what I've seen

[Drew-1990]

If you are attractive to him I'm sure you will be fine in the end. Probably a little weird to begin but you have the attraction already.

[DizzyDesii]

I don't know I've definitely been attracted but sexually incompatible before

[Drew-1990]

Maybe I'm wrong but I feel over time you can change that

[nawtee_me]

Are you looking to soften the pain? Are you trying to find someone to hold you up so you don’t fall so far? I may be way off base since I am just going from our last conversation and not knowing if that is working ou t with you are your dude?

[DizzyDesii]

My dude and i are still in limbo. After he ruined vday week, we’re just going with the flow and now my mind has started considering other tunnels to flow down for if we dont workout

[DizzyDesii]

Plus I've started back going to church and it feels like the preachers talking to me when he says “God wakes you up in the middle
Of the night because he's telling you thats not where you should be” 😩

[nawtee_me]

You know if you ever need or want someone to pray with you, I am here for you…

[DizzyDesii]

Thank you. he's surprisingly started using words like “blessings/blessed”. Maybe he's changing

[nawtee_me]

Fingers crossed….

[DizzyDesii]

I think he's shocked I've started back church

[nawtee_me]

I am glad to hear it, I need to do that too. It has been a long time since I went to church.

[DizzyDesii]

Yea i hadn't been to church since like 2020. But yesterday was my second Sunday. And i personally want a new church because i dont trust my preacher. But it def felt like Gods word was directed at me last Sunday

[nawtee_me]

Funny how that happens…. lol. Like God knows what you need to hear or something….

[DizzyDesii]

But what if the preacher wasn't actually talking to me
And what if this is where im mean tto be

[nawtee_me]

The preacher delivers the message and the Holy Spirit opens the ears of the one who needs to hear it.

[DizzyDesii]

I feel like ima cry 😩

[nawtee_me]

Now is the time to ask God to show you what you need to do.

[TallAnon]

Height is really no issue when it comes to sex, tall guys like us are very used to the height difference, so we're used to it.
More to the point, better not to string them along if you're not going to be interested.

[DizzyDesii]

I know he’d be great at lifting 😆 but I don't know if it would be stringing him along. I def like him i just dont know if i sexually like him

[TallAnon]

Well, you're in a relationship, so cross that bridge when you get there 😁 Are you planning to break up?

[DizzyDesii]

Sounds like that huh

[laly520]

no harm in staying friends but boundaries has to be set

[DizzyDesii]

Yea we def know the boundaries

[SunnyRS]

I don't think I can stay friends with someone like that, I wish I could but it's not possible for me always having a what if in my mind.
A clean cut is better than the nagging daily pain.

[DizzyDesii]

Maybe

[Twalli]

I think you love him, but aren't in love with him. You should probably tell him that you do love him, but you don't think you could ever be "in love with" him.

[DizzyDesii]

Interesting considering i love my boyfriend but am not in love with him. As for my friend who im referring to above, last year i admitted that i was in love with him. He reciprocated And then i immaturely freaked out and got with my current boyfriend 😆💀

[Twalli]

Why would you date someone you aren't in love with?

[elaphe]

It seems from your description that you have a major crush on this guy. Why not try to date him if he has all of these positive qualities? If it doesn't work out, what have you lost?

[DizzyDesii]

I’d have lost my friend

[Yannae]

How can you be physically attracted to someone and not want to be sexual?

[DizzyDesii]

Thats never been hard for me. I find a lot of people hot but sex never crossed my mind with them. Normally it would take a person to grab or kiss me a certain way to even envision that. I didn't even see myself fckin my current dude until he grabbed my ass and then suddenly i saw him differently 😆

[Yannae]

Okay I see. Yeah we think differently. You pass by me and I have to do a double check. If you're already eye candy with clothes on, I don't see why you wouldn't be without.

[DizzyDesii]

Haha. I mean i know he's hot shirtless and stuff. But that doesn't mean i wanna see what that dick can do

[Yannae]

I was looking at google pictures of women now and I still had trouble not seeing it, so as a last ditch effort, I read the description of your post. So it could be because of the height difference. If my girl was freakishly tall my mind would probably think other things. Can she even fit on the bed? 69 doesn't exist then? If she's on top is my pelvis going to be okay? 😭

[Yannae]

If it's something I haven't done before that isn't quite similar to what I've experienced, it's hard yeah.

[DizzyDesii]

Aww man yea we prob can't do 69 🙈

[Yannae]

Yeah when I have to ask me questions like that I don't think I can see it either. Thanks, I learned today