Why Am I never approached by men when I go out?

[vbjordache]

I hate to even ask, but I'm a little hurt by this.Whenever I go out to concerts or to go dancing at a bar, I hardly ever get approached.I fix myself up well..smell nice..not to sound conceited or anything, but I find myself attractive.I try to be social even though I'm a little shy. At work I'm known as the social butterfly..I smile and I'm a nice girl in general. What upsets me though is I have this friend that never says anything to anyone and she's average looking like me. I guess she has a big butt and chest, which guys like and I'm on the smaller side with both, but I know there should be some guy out there that's not just all about those things. When it comes time for them to come over and talk to us, my friend won't say anything and whether I would be interested in them or not, I talk back to them because someone should if not that would be rude.I've seen them look at me before and smile and seem interested..then they talk to us and I talk back..she never says a word because she's not interested but somehow they always ask for her # or fbook message her.What's wrong here? Do they prefer a girl that doesn't talk over one that does? It doesn't make sense to me and I know I shouldn't let any guy get me down, but it kind of gets irritating after awhile and then she asks what's wrong like she knows and just kind of wants to rub it in? I can't seem desperate because I don't even go out of my way to talk to men unless they do me. I'm a happy girl with a great career. . I just don't understand. Anyone had anything like this happen before? It happens to me everytime I go out or if they are interested in me..we're completely different people or they're drunk. Is there something wrong with me? I'm a people person and I love socializing with people and making new friends and would eventually like to find a guy to have something with.

[cheesesteak7]

If you're at a club/bar, chances are the guys are super shallow and you may just not fit their ideal look or maybe your friend just has that better of boobs/butt that the guys go for her first and don't want to be rude and treat you as seconds.

As for the talkative thing, again, that's the bar/club scene for ya. Talking really doesn't matter, just looks for the majority of the people there. Do you think guys go there to meet their ideal princess? VERY highly unlikely. I know plenty of people do it - look to find "the one" at a bar or club, but it just isn't the right place. Even if you're just trying to find a decent guy, chances are any decent guy at a bar/club probably isn't going to take the time to hit on girls anyway.

Chances are your best bet of finding a man are better in sober scenarios - work, class, clubs, being a regular somewhere, etc. You seem attractive enough. You just have to pick better surroundings or environments to partake in "the game".

[cheesesteak7]

oh and by "clubs" in that last paragraph, I meant like book clubs or cooking clubs lol...not dance clubs!

[vbjordache]

Lol.. I understand. Thanks for advice :)

[Anonymous]

There are two possible reasons - 1) You're not attractive. 2) You're off putting. That is giving off the vibe that says You'd better not come and talk to me.

One of the ways you could be off putting, for example, is that you see talking back to someone as an obligation - you do it so you're not rude. Rather than talk to someone because you WANT to talk to them, or find them interesting.

[Eternallylucky]

You look pretty attractive

How small or short are you?

[vbjordache]

I'm 5'3

[Eternallylucky]

You might be one of those types that have to try everywhere before you find your special someone. Being at a concert or a bar isn't a place where the good ones hang around in. Have you tried joining a hobby club or doing volunteer work that help you to find someone where the atmosphere is more personable?

[vbjordache]

No I haven't. I honestly don't know where I would go for that. Those are things I enjoy...to go out dancing and concerts. I realize it wouldn't have to be at a bar, I just don't know where many singles hang out but therw because they're looking for people for the most part too.

[Eternallylucky]

You'll be surprised, men have a fetish for big women (motherly types) too.

[vbjordache]

So you think I'm too overweight or what do you mean? I mean you can be honest..that's what I want.. I just feel I have the personality that most people like because I'm for the most part a happy go lucky/down to earth kinda girl..bubbly..everyone's always telling me that. I've seen really pretty girls that are heavier than me and have a big bubbly personality too that get all kinds of mens attention/attracted and wanting to talk to them and get to know them.I just don't get it.

[Eternallylucky]

No I was talking about the reason why men are hitting on your friend, the bigger one.

[vbjordache]

Oh ok. Yeah.. i understand that they like her big boobs and butt. It's just how can you really try to have anything with someone that won't even talk? I guess it just doesn't matter to men. I would want to be able to at least have a conversation with someone before i did anything with them or tried to be more with them. Things are so hard to understand sometimes...lol
Well thanks for your input. I appreciate it.

[Eternallylucky]

It's most likely a sexual attraction rather than emotional. I mean they could be just players. No problems!

[thatbuffedkid]

It really really depends on how hot you are so

[Anonymous]

You're cute. How much you weigh?

[vbjordache]

Ok..so someone else just asked me about my height..is this just about weight and height? My friend is a lottle heavier than me...just has all the right parts I guess..lol

[Opinion Owner]

Well because guys usually care about those things your height is fine as long as you have a butt and nice boobs your all set and not "fat". Your face is cute though so I don't see why guys aren't going for you.

[vbjordache]

Thanks..you just helped me figure it out. If I need to lose weight I can do that, but I can't get a bigger chest/butt without being fake and I don't want that. So I guess single is what I'll be..lol.
Thanks for the input though.

[Opinion Owner]

You can get a bigger butt... squats and workout but the trick it losing weight at the same time. Its all diet. Do cardio too.