I married a bad boy... and divorced a bad boy. Now I'm totally in love with the introverted, shy intellectual type of man. Now that I've grown up that is
@allwomenwantme nooo, I've nvr cheated on him. Even though we aren't bf/gf yet. It's been 4 years since either of us has had sex... neither of us date anyone else either... he is in introvert and shy, but a freak in the bedroom. Once that shyness is gone most of the time this type of man is way more attentive in the bedroom. Sexual drive and techie have nothing to do with being and introvert and shy after the line for shyness has been crossed
I agree. Stay far away from these bad girls. My friend almost lost an eye fighting over his official girl who was attracted to a bad boy in a club. Bad boys form gangs r cowards and girls that fall for this crowd normally have issues. Some of these crazy girls want blood to flow between men others want to b notorious. Either way society wants a bad ass person in a job situation or workplace to handle things and get stuff done. After these girls have sense screwed into them they want the quiet decent guys to care for their "bad" babies and play happy family. Best advice is to tell them to f*uck off back to "bad heaven". I broke a few fingers in that fight with the bad gang and my friend almost lost his eye. So bad ass girls can f*uck off !!!
How are you defining bad & good and why aren't you factoring in different aspects like chemistry, values, interests/hobbies, and life goals. Some guys just expect girls to flock to them without any self-improvement or social skills. And no I don't mean the guy has to be a pick up artist. I've met some self proclaimed, "good guys" who were overtly sexual and were unable to pick up on the discomfort of everyone watching. This whole deflective, victim mentality is ridiculous. Life isn't black and white and if you want to see results then work on your ability to observe and adapt.
its not all about girls. men have to find a proper, marriage material woman as well. most girls especially your age aren't like that. not from the values and training they received from their home nor from personal development.
My observation skills led me to the conclusion that women don't know how to pick decent men. My experiences of watching women fuck valueless men that don't provide, treat them with respect, or put forth effort in household duties AND THE having those women complain to me about their relationship problems gave me the black and white perspective.
When all I witness is females in bad relationships or bad females that ruin good relationships... How you gonna tell a man that his perspective is wrong? I witnessed this shit with my own two eyes! I was in the room when they started throwing dishes! I was her shoulder to cry on when she poisoned her relationship with el fuckboy! Girls that like bad boys are the worst types of females, they deserve that broken relationship cause they ignore decent men.
@Wwwyzzerdd Then find yourself a decent woman. Why are you pursuing self destructive and toxic women? I said observe and adapt, not observe and lament over other people's short comings. If you've OBSERVED toxic women then ADAPT and stop letting them dump their baggage on you.
And know for a fact that I want a long term, healthy, mutually supportive relationship. Guess who's not chasing punks? Me. I know what I want, it's interesting that you think you know every single female on the face of this planet. I've seen too much to settle for a destructive relationship. I'm not as naive as you assume.
I don't like bad boys- I've always liked the good, smart even nerdy, guys because my biological mother liked bad boys and that led to her becoming a drug addict, prostitute, getting all of her 5 kids (each from a different bad boy) taken away from her and going in and out of jail. I've got no interest in following in her steps. Yep, just good boys for me...
'I have NEVER known an Asian, direct African, or Indian girl to ever be interested in bad boys or want anything to do with them, though I have known some secular Arab girls who have been born and raised here who do. If other races do like bad boys, please fill me in. But to my knowledge this is usually an exclusive Western world thing.'
.. yeah. It's a largely western thing because women in the middle east/India will often get brutally murdered if they date who THEY want to date. Only in the west do women have the right to meet men they're interested in so kindly keep your beliefs as to who women should be 'permitted' to get to know to yourself.
@Omar5881 I'm aware those aren't the only middle eastern countries. You're right in saying that Egypt is not alone in terms of forcing women to cover every part of their bodies other than eyes, not permitting women to leave the house without being accompanied by a husband chosen for her to spend the rest of her life with by her family, etc.
In most of the middle eastern countries that doesn't happen In Saudi niqab ain't obligatory by the government
I'm against what Iran , Pakistan , Saudi , Afghanistan do in terms of laws and inhuman behaviour of the society
But just to notice , do you expect someone who's ignorant to be intellect about astrophysics? I think not
Poverty is a HUGEEE factor in these barbaric behaviours of some and that's what isis targets or other radical groups I mean it's simple maths here when you have a humble job you might starve to death that's why Arabia is mostly 3rd world countries
@Omar5881 Interesting to hear you say that doesn't happen in 'most middle-eastern countries' when all you hear about from that region is a whole regarding women is about ones who were murdered and/or gang-raped because she took the liberty to spend time with someone her family disapproved with.
I COMPLETELY understand this , for example if most of what we hear about mexcio is drugs we would think all people their are drug dealers but that's never the case
It's just due to the poverty and fuckin dumb education if found in the middle east when crimes happen they're more savage , but NORMALLY that's not the case , besides laws starting to get easy in Saudi Arabia, I am not defending or supporting I am aganist this country for several reasons besides their wahabism, but things aren't as bad as pictured, in the gulf and north Africa But Iran , Pakistan , Afghanistan are as bad as pictured coz these country as far as ik got ruled by a bunch of radials and shit
@Omar5881 hopefully that's the case. Though not so sure about it being entirely due to poverty as many of the girls I am friends with who are Afghani, for example, have the same backwards 'values' or beliefs about a woman's role of subservience in society/relationships, despite having been raised in North America.
Of course of course not the only reason It's a part it but a big part And of course you got some religious ass heads who are just inhuman and freakin radicals But you got radicals in every belief and non belief
@Omar5881 true. Though no radicals from any other religion come to mind which basically eradicate the liberty of half of the believers based on nothing but the sex they were born as.
That's not true , you never find an atheist who hates women? Never saw a Hindu raping a woman? Never saw an Asian forcing thier daughter to marry someone? Hell it's a tradition in China to tease a woman sexually and it's more like sexual harassments like out of her will
It's just happens in arabia that these people are in packs lol makes it easier to throw a grenade tho lol
@Omar5881 My boyfriend is Chinese and no, I've never heard of any sort of tradition where women are teased in any way, much less sexually. I think you've mistaken china with the middle east. (likewise with throwing grenades and males walking around in packs or 'herds' as they behave like rabid animals)
@Omar5881 oh okay if you only saw it online on a FB page, it's probably just a kink or something held by a select few individuals who just so happen to be Chinese. Degradation of women or seeing them as second-tier citizens is in no way part of Chinese culture, though.
@FýrdracaDócincel It didn't say that in the take. I'm simply replying to above posts on my opinion as such: 'Never saw an Asian forcing thier daughter to marry someone? Hell it's a tradition in China to tease a woman sexually and it's more like sexual harassments like out of her will'
@FýrdracaDócincel That was towards the take. I meant what it says- that it's amusing as well as a bit pitiful that op feels like he's in a position to tell women who they can date.
sure. In a manner that is very belittling/condescending towards women- as if a man from Egypt, of all places, would be in a position to even know what women actually want.
I would argue that women who like bad boys could use a wake-up call. You can give me as much of this "what women actually want" crap as you're able. Doesn't change the lack of farsight a lot of these women have in their dating choices, and how those choices often affect the people around them.
Now, since you're so adamant about defending this, just what do you mean by "what women want?"
@FýrdracaDócincel I'm simply answering your questions and will continue to do so as I see fit. By 'what women want', I mean that I find it ironic to have a man from a culture which hugely oppresses women to be giving advice on what women allegedly want. As if he'd give two fucks anyway.
If it's an individual thing then you really shouldn't be angry (or avoiding of challenging my points). Because it looked to me like you were making what women want synonymous with the bad boy.
@FýrdracaDócincel Uhh.. what? What women want is the same thing as a bad boy? ... right. I think I know what you mean but, if you scroll up to where I said that each women wants different things, you'd have your answer.
If it depends on the individual woman, then why are you so upset that people have a problem with this particular topic? You make it seem as if no woman will EVER be completely satisfied if something is keeping her from dating a bad boy.
Girls who go for bad boys either like trouble or they have a savior complex. Either way, it's bad news. Self-proclaimed nice guys are rarely much better though. People who truly are nice don't need to rely on labels in order for people to think well of them.
@Armourdillo I mean, in a situation where you are directly being asked, it's a little different. I think in that case, it would be reasonable to say that you are nice (or at least that you try to be nice, if you want to be humble about it). The men I'm referring to here as being "self-proclaimed nice guys" are the ones who go complaining "I'm such a nice guy, why can't I get a girlfriend?" But the reality is that their standards are way too high, they only want to date the most attractive women, and they get frustrated that those women won't date them, so they turn around and call women bitches and cunts for having standards of their own. Basically, they are bitter assholes who think the fact that they want to get married and settle down is enough to make them "nice". But NOT every guy is like this. I am referring to a very specific type here.
It's interesting how you mentioned having a "saviour complex" I didn't even know there was a name for it. I have two girls, both from very intense relationships. My eldest's dad was in a pretty dark place when I met him. He was heavy drinker and was forever seemingly trying to set a record for how many times someone could get arrested... but he had this other, vulnerable side to him and I learned stuff that explained a lot about why he was the was he was. My youngest daughter's dad was and is the opposite. He's the sweetest, shyest guy I've ever met, but also, back when I met him, in the middle of a pretty big gambling addiction. It hit me pretty recently that what they had/have in common is that they both had things about them that I wanted to rescue. I wanted to take care of them... I spoke to a friend about it and he agreed that I always go for guys like that. I just didn't realise it was a complex! Thank you for indirectly making sense of something in a single sentence!
@AperolSpritz The idea that you can care for someone, help them, or "fix" them can be an incredibly powerful pull, especially if you are a caring type of person who likes to feel needed. It's not anything to be ashamed of, but it's good to be aware of it because it can lead you into situations that aren't good for you. I'm glad I could help!
@samhradh_leannan made a good point and I'd like to add to it, that if you as a guy go after a girl who's clearly into a "bad boy", you are in every way just as dumb as she is. The both of you are trying to get with someone who clearly doesn't want you. The both of you are trying to downplay being badly treated - the girl by the "bad boy" and the "nice guy" by the girl who will pretty much ignore him and his effort. Just face it, this girl isn't as sweet as you think she is, you just want what you can't have. So if you're going to try to drag girls who like bad guys, then you should drag these "nice guys" just as much, because they're quite literally in the same dumbass boat. Both the guy and the girl in that kind of scenario needs to wake the fuck up and find someone else instead.
I agree that "nice guys" aren't necessarily all that, but you're agreeing with the opinion that most suits you, and you want it to be that a guy/guys still have to be at fault or be pathetic just because we're talking about girls' behavior so you can feel better about it.
Also, you have cases where the guys don't know the girl they're interested in is into bad boys until it later comes up or comes out. Furthermore, unlike women, decent guys don't want to change those girls, they want to be accepted by them, which is why I'm telling guys that it's a waste of time to bother with them.
"and you want it to be that a guy/guys still have to be at fault or be pathetic just because we're talking about girls' behavior so you can feel better about it."
Uh no, I don't have anything to "feel better about" just because I think the girls and the guys in those situations are equally stupid. If the guy finds out later then that's fine, obviously you can't always foresee something like that. But a pathetic amount of them keep pining after the girl even after finding out, despite the fact that she also most likely treats them like shit. Wanting to be accepted by someone who doesn't really care about you is just about as pathetic as wanting to change someone who's "bad". Both fights are equally pointless and will end in the person getting hurt. You're right in the fact that it's a waste of time to bother with girls who are obsessed with bad guys. But I'm just saying that guys who are obsessed with girls who are obsessed with bad guys, are pretty pathetic too.
Which, is something they rarely want to take any responsibility for - which is why I'm bringing it up. Instead of being like "hey, I'm kinda acting like a loser and I need to get over this girl asap", they're like "OMG girls only like BAD GUYS not NICE GUYS like mE!! Boohoo".
"Uh no, I don't have anything to "feel better about" just because I think the girls and the guys in those situations are equally stupid." - It's because you want them to be equally stupid when that is not very much the case.
Guys are not obsessing over girls who like bad guys. Guys are feeling disappointed or discouraged because so many girls around them are wanting badboys, and they feel like no one will want them, even though there are other great girls out there. THAT is what they are consumed by.
Pf. Kinda sad to see that you won't admit that they're just as desperate as the girls pining after the bad guys. "and they feel like no one will want them, even though there are other great girls out there." Obsessed an pathetic.
You WANT me to view them the same as you do because you want them to be in the same lot.
That disappointment is really no less different than any girl who feels like guys don't want her because she's too quiet or decent. It's a human emotion, and there's really nothing desperate or pathetic about it.
Bad Boys are like slutty dress/easier girls to guys.
You are drawn to them as they are exciting and wild... but you also know they aren't good for you and NOT marriage material.
Sadly girls end up having kids with the "Bad Boys" and end up being single moms with no $$ No future for her and her kids... Story of the USA... Since the 60's feminist movement.
So what percentage of girls would say like bad boys then? I mean Romance novels are full of Bad Boy archetypes.
When you say young girls when is it these girls finally grow a brain and realize hey these guys are losers. Personally I see more teenage girls and girls in early 20s who have this bad boy obsession. Would you say they grow out of this bad boy phase once they reach around 25?
That is long time I must say. In your experience however what percentage of women would you say are drawn to bad boys, or its just safe to assume its cultural norm.
Ya know, I might agree that it's LOOSELY a cultural norm because of the stylization of bad boys. Though I would probably say about 65% of young women are into that.
See the problem with this is it completely disregards the fact the people are complex. I date people not sterotypes. Some of my best relationships have been with guys labelled the "bad boy" some of my worst with ones labelled "nice guy." People don't fit into neat little boxes and just because you can't see what someone sees in someone doesn't mean they are wrong for seeing it. I'd be more worried about distancing myself from someone who chooses to judge people based on ridiculous stereoypes rather then girls who appear to date "bad boys."
Its in the name, "Bad *BOYS*"... Not men. Bad boys will get into bar scraps, maybe deal a little weed n white too, maybe ride a crotch rocket afforded by mummy and daddy, or a stolen bmw...
Bad *MEN* on the other hand, are in the real, visceral world, fighting the good fight, boning WOMEN who aren't insecure little girls thinking that a faux "tough guy" persona is the real deal. Bad MEN have fo make the toughest decisions in life, often times at the expense of their own livelihoods, getting into all kinds of social, political, cultural and economic strife - for the long term betterment of his family, friends and country. A bad MAN maybe a killer, but for good reason, and he definitely prefers a cruiser motorcycle like an 883 sportster at the very least!
If I were a chick looking for virtue, I'd pick the latter over former...
I agree with you, especially the bit about age. Dealing with women chasing the bad boys in high school, sure, that's just what it is in high school. It's part of the growing experience. Dealing with women my age that fall for the bad boys is just not worth my time. If you're a grown adult (living on your own, paying bills, have a job, etc.) and you fall for some bad boy, that's just not someone I need in my life. Bye girl.
The higher a guy is on the social ladder, the more excuses girls will make to justify his behavior. Likewise the lower a guy is on the social ladder, the harder girls will try to condemn or downplay everything he does.
Deep down, every single one of us is a prick.
Me? Prick.
You? Prick.
The rest of your commentors? One big smelly bag of cocks.
So it really is best to just do whatever the hell you want and/or whatever you believe needs to be done. If the girls around you decide to bitch about how "terrible" a person you are, take it with grace.
You didn't do anything wrong, you're just not the guy they wanted to see doing it.
@frozenhorizon Maybe not. But it means a hell of a lot for how much you can "get away with" asserting yourself. If a girl thinks you're an asshole or something similar because you got what you wanted, she would have been disgusted with you no matter what you did anyway.
They want each other. Since i am not that kind of guy i will leave them both to it. They probably even deserve each other. In the meantime i am still a single virgin, who never had a girlfriend but doesn't really mind. If i find a good woman, then that's great. If not then there is no harm. The way i see rejection is their loss, not mine. I just live my life the way it is.
Sure, it gets lonely at times and sometimes i get frustrated or sad but hey, that's life. I grow strong of all of that. Luckily porn is keeping me in check and holding me together as a substitute. It works at least.
i like someone who i think will prtect me and stand up for me a guy standing up for you is great my boyfriend one time went off on this guy for looking at me because the guy was being a pervert and that was so great, and guys that are actively chasing a female with flowers and compliments are the problem not nice guys, like you make the girl feel like she's better than you and i want someone who is actually real like someone with a personality other than just being nice like my boyfriend being nice to me and treating me right is usper important but so is him having a personality and standing up for me
This was great. Personally i find it ridiculous all these girls who hang out with "bad boys" I tend to socialise with neither. I have a gentlemen of a boyfriend and wouldn't ask for any different.
You can balance it by finding someone who's not a push over and someone who's exciting. Bad boys are always assholes. Sometimes they're exciting people.
Like I said though, an exciting person isn't necessarily bad. I want someone who keeps me excited. I don't want someone who just goes through the motions of life because that's not what I'm about.
I guess it depends on your definition of what's exciting, because a lot of these girls want momentary, senseless thrills, quick entertainment and laughs in a hate-myself moment, danger and defiance.
I love how you like to put everything into tiny definitions of what is and isn't what girls should want or do want. It's pathetic. I used to think you were cool and actually weren't a misogynist but clearly I was wrong. 'These girls'. I assume you're throwing me into that definition, cause we're all the same right?
But again it's blaming women. Instead of saying men shouldn't behave that way, it's women's fault for dating them. In the same way it's a woman's fault if she gets raped or it's a woman's fault that she stays with an abuser when we all know there's a fucking lot of blame that should go on the man. Men are not innocent. And it's disgusting that this mentality is still around.
@Blonde401 Oh men certainly shouldn't behave that way, and many people have said as much. No one is teaching guys to be bad, but again, women are making the choices to date the ones who are. It IS all up to them in the end. Just because a guy is bad, doesn't mean she has to go with him. We could even argue that women are being misogynist to their own selves for picking them.
You do realise men don't start out as cunts right? They are nice and fun and lovely when they draw you in. Nobody dates an asshole who behaves that way on the first date. By then you've caught feelings etc. It's more complicated that you think.
@Blonde401 I'm not that complicated unfortunately, I'm perfectly capable of looking like an (unintentional) bellend on any occassion, let alone saving it for a first date! ;p;
Um can't say I ever liked bad boys when I was 14 I liked a boy who was sweet as can be his hair was 2 toned though and a few weeks later he shaved his head and Started ignoring me acting a real ass to everyone I was like um no we are done here I'm not dealing with a brat
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I married a bad boy... and divorced a bad boy. Now I'm totally in love with the introverted, shy intellectual type of man. Now that I've grown up that is
have you ever cheated on your introvert dude? Do you miss the thrill that you got from hot guys (bad boys)?
@allwomenwantme nooo, I've nvr cheated on him. Even though we aren't bf/gf yet. It's been 4 years since either of us has had sex... neither of us date anyone else either... he is in introvert and shy, but a freak in the bedroom. Once that shyness is gone most of the time this type of man is way more attentive in the bedroom. Sexual drive and techie have nothing to do with being and introvert and shy after the line for shyness has been crossed
@Marsha003 Wowww. You guys haven't had sex in 4 years? Interesting.
I agree. Stay far away from these bad girls. My friend almost lost an eye fighting over his official girl who was attracted to a bad boy in a club. Bad boys form gangs r cowards and girls that fall for this crowd normally have issues. Some of these crazy girls want blood to flow between men others want to b notorious. Either way society wants a bad ass person in a job situation or workplace to handle things and get stuff done. After these girls have sense screwed into them they want the quiet decent guys to care for their "bad" babies and play happy family. Best advice is to tell them to f*uck off back to "bad heaven". I broke a few fingers in that fight with the bad gang and my friend almost lost his eye. So bad ass girls can f*uck off !!!
How are you defining bad & good and why aren't you factoring in different aspects like chemistry, values, interests/hobbies, and life goals. Some guys just expect girls to flock to them without any self-improvement or social skills. And no I don't mean the guy has to be a pick up artist. I've met some self proclaimed, "good guys" who were overtly sexual and were unable to pick up on the discomfort of everyone watching. This whole deflective, victim mentality is ridiculous. Life isn't black and white and if you want to see results then work on your ability to observe and adapt.
*goals?
its not all about girls. men have to find a proper, marriage material woman as well. most girls especially your age aren't like that. not from the values and training they received from their home nor from personal development.
@levantine99 Same with guys my age. I'm still a teenager. What's your point?
Most guys in their late teens and below 25 aren't ready for marriage.
My observation skills led me to the conclusion that women don't know how to pick decent men. My experiences of watching women fuck valueless men that don't provide, treat them with respect, or put forth effort in household duties AND THE having those women complain to me about their relationship problems gave me the black and white perspective.
When all I witness is females in bad relationships or bad females that ruin good relationships... How you gonna tell a man that his perspective is wrong? I witnessed this shit with my own two eyes! I was in the room when they started throwing dishes! I was her shoulder to cry on when she poisoned her relationship with el fuckboy! Girls that like bad boys are the worst types of females, they deserve that broken relationship cause they ignore decent men.
@levantine99 Well spoken.
@Wwwyzzerdd Then find yourself a decent woman. Why are you pursuing self destructive and toxic women? I said observe and adapt, not observe and lament over other people's short comings. If you've OBSERVED toxic women then ADAPT and stop letting them dump their baggage on you.
And know for a fact that I want a long term, healthy, mutually supportive relationship. Guess who's not chasing punks? Me. I know what I want, it's interesting that you think you know every single female on the face of this planet. I've seen too much to settle for a destructive relationship. I'm not as naive as you assume.
I don't like bad boys- I've always liked the good, smart even nerdy, guys because my biological mother liked bad boys and that led to her becoming a drug addict, prostitute, getting all of her 5 kids (each from a different bad boy) taken away from her and going in and out of jail. I've got no interest in following in her steps. Yep, just good boys for me...
Same here. Sometimes being raised by bad examples teaches you what NOT to do.
'I have NEVER known an Asian, direct African, or Indian girl to ever be interested in bad boys or want anything to do with them, though I have known some secular Arab girls who have been born and raised here who do. If other races do like bad boys, please fill me in. But to my knowledge this is usually an exclusive Western world thing.'
.. yeah. It's a largely western thing because women in the middle east/India will often get brutally murdered if they date who THEY want to date. Only in the west do women have the right to meet men they're interested in so kindly keep your beliefs as to who women should be 'permitted' to get to know to yourself.
Girls here date however they want , paki and Saudi ain't the only middle eastern countries kayla
@Omar5881 I'm aware those aren't the only middle eastern countries. You're right in saying that Egypt is not alone in terms of forcing women to cover every part of their bodies other than eyes, not permitting women to leave the house without being accompanied by a husband chosen for her to spend the rest of her life with by her family, etc.
In most of the middle eastern countries that doesn't happen
In Saudi niqab ain't obligatory by the government
I'm against what Iran , Pakistan , Saudi , Afghanistan do in terms of laws and inhuman behaviour of the society
But just to notice , do you expect someone who's ignorant to be intellect about astrophysics? I think not
Poverty is a HUGEEE factor in these barbaric behaviours of some and that's what isis targets or other radical groups I mean it's simple maths here when you have a humble job you might starve to death that's why Arabia is mostly 3rd world countries
@Omar5881 Interesting to hear you say that doesn't happen in 'most middle-eastern countries' when all you hear about from that region is a whole regarding women is about ones who were murdered and/or gang-raped because she took the liberty to spend time with someone her family disapproved with.
I COMPLETELY understand this , for example if most of what we hear about mexcio is drugs we would think all people their are drug dealers but that's never the case
It's just due to the poverty and fuckin dumb education if found in the middle east when crimes happen they're more savage , but NORMALLY that's not the case , besides laws starting to get easy in Saudi Arabia, I am not defending or supporting I am aganist this country for several reasons besides their wahabism, but things aren't as bad as pictured, in the gulf and north Africa
But Iran , Pakistan , Afghanistan are as bad as pictured coz these country as far as ik got ruled by a bunch of radials and shit
@Omar5881 hopefully that's the case.
Though not so sure about it being entirely due to poverty as many of the girls I am friends with who are Afghani, for example, have the same backwards 'values' or beliefs about a woman's role of subservience in society/relationships, despite having been raised in North America.
Of course of course not the only reason
It's a part it but a big part
And of course you got some religious ass heads who are just inhuman and freakin radicals
But you got radicals in every belief and non belief
@Omar5881 true. Though no radicals from any other religion come to mind which basically eradicate the liberty of half of the believers based on nothing but the sex they were born as.
That's not true , you never find an atheist who hates women? Never saw a Hindu raping a woman? Never saw an Asian forcing thier daughter to marry someone?
Hell it's a tradition in China to tease a woman sexually and it's more like sexual harassments like out of her will
It's just happens in arabia that these people are in packs lol makes it easier to throw a grenade tho lol
@Omar5881 My boyfriend is Chinese and no, I've never heard of any sort of tradition where women are teased in any way, much less sexually. I think you've mistaken china with the middle east.
(likewise with throwing grenades and males walking around in packs or 'herds' as they behave like rabid animals)
That Chinese stuff I saw online on playground page of Facebook I think or AJ not sure
@Omar5881 oh okay if you only saw it online on a FB page, it's probably just a kink or something held by a select few individuals who just so happen to be Chinese. Degradation of women or seeing them as second-tier citizens is in no way part of Chinese culture, though.
Oh for fuck's sake..
Where in this MyTake did he say anything that would imply that women should be restricted on who they can meet?
@FýrdracaDócincel It didn't say that in the take. I'm simply replying to above posts on my opinion as such:
'Never saw an Asian forcing thier daughter to marry someone?
Hell it's a tradition in China to tease a woman sexually and it's more like sexual harassments like out of her will'
"so kindly keep your beliefs as to who women should be 'permitted' to get to know to yourself."
Then what did you mean by this?
@FýrdracaDócincel That was towards the take. I meant what it says- that it's amusing as well as a bit pitiful that op feels like he's in a position to tell women who they can date.
He's not, though. He's telling guys not to chase those girls because it only leads to unmitigated bullsh*t, which I myself can attest to.
sure. In a manner that is very belittling/condescending towards women- as if a man from Egypt, of all places, would be in a position to even know what women actually want.
I would argue that women who like bad boys could use a wake-up call. You can give me as much of this "what women actually want" crap as you're able. Doesn't change the lack of farsight a lot of these women have in their dating choices, and how those choices often affect the people around them.
Now, since you're so adamant about defending this, just what do you mean by "what women want?"
@FýrdracaDócincel I'm simply answering your questions and will continue to do so as I see fit.
By 'what women want', I mean that I find it ironic to have a man from a culture which hugely oppresses women to be giving advice on what women allegedly want. As if he'd give two fucks anyway.
I mean what are YOU saying women want?
@FýrdracaDócincel That's an individual thing so.. I can tell you what I want. Which isn't universally applicable to all women.
If it's an individual thing then you really shouldn't be angry (or avoiding of challenging my points). Because it looked to me like you were making what women want synonymous with the bad boy.
@FýrdracaDócincel Uhh.. what? What women want is the same thing as a bad boy?
... right. I think I know what you mean but, if you scroll up to where I said that each women wants different things, you'd have your answer.
"I think I know what you mean but"
You don't.
If it depends on the individual woman, then why are you so upset that people have a problem with this particular topic? You make it seem as if no woman will EVER be completely satisfied if something is keeping her from dating a bad boy.
@FýrdracaDócincel why do you keep pulling these completely random conclusions out of your ass?
I'm putting 2 & 2 together.
Africans love bad boys. Idi Amin had 4 wives and he was well naughty!
Girls who go for bad boys either like trouble or they have a savior complex. Either way, it's bad news. Self-proclaimed nice guys are rarely much better though. People who truly are nice don't need to rely on labels in order for people to think well of them.
So if a girl asks me "are you a nice guy or a bad guy" what should i respond with?
@Armourdillo "I'll let you be the judge of that"
@Armourdillo I mean, in a situation where you are directly being asked, it's a little different. I think in that case, it would be reasonable to say that you are nice (or at least that you try to be nice, if you want to be humble about it). The men I'm referring to here as being "self-proclaimed nice guys" are the ones who go complaining "I'm such a nice guy, why can't I get a girlfriend?" But the reality is that their standards are way too high, they only want to date the most attractive women, and they get frustrated that those women won't date them, so they turn around and call women bitches and cunts for having standards of their own. Basically, they are bitter assholes who think the fact that they want to get married and settle down is enough to make them "nice". But NOT every guy is like this. I am referring to a very specific type here.
@CollieWinters Actually yeah that's a really clever response.
@Armourdillo say " I am what I am "and if they look at you oddly they are not for you
It's interesting how you mentioned having a "saviour complex" I didn't even know there was a name for it. I have two girls, both from very intense relationships. My eldest's dad was in a pretty dark place when I met him. He was heavy drinker and was forever seemingly trying to set a record for how many times someone could get arrested... but he had this other, vulnerable side to him and I learned stuff that explained a lot about why he was the was he was.
My youngest daughter's dad was and is the opposite. He's the sweetest, shyest guy I've ever met, but also, back when I met him, in the middle of a pretty big gambling addiction.
It hit me pretty recently that what they had/have in common is that they both had things about them that I wanted to rescue. I wanted to take care of them... I spoke to a friend about it and he agreed that I always go for guys like that. I just didn't realise it was a complex! Thank you for indirectly making sense of something in a single sentence!
@AperolSpritz The idea that you can care for someone, help them, or "fix" them can be an incredibly powerful pull, especially if you are a caring type of person who likes to feel needed. It's not anything to be ashamed of, but it's good to be aware of it because it can lead you into situations that aren't good for you. I'm glad I could help!
@samhradh_leannan made a good point and I'd like to add to it, that if you as a guy go after a girl who's clearly into a "bad boy", you are in every way just as dumb as she is. The both of you are trying to get with someone who clearly doesn't want you. The both of you are trying to downplay being badly treated - the girl by the "bad boy" and the "nice guy" by the girl who will pretty much ignore him and his effort. Just face it, this girl isn't as sweet as you think she is, you just want what you can't have.
So if you're going to try to drag girls who like bad guys, then you should drag these "nice guys" just as much, because they're quite literally in the same dumbass boat. Both the guy and the girl in that kind of scenario needs to wake the fuck up and find someone else instead.
I agree that "nice guys" aren't necessarily all that, but you're agreeing with the opinion that most suits you, and you want it to be that a guy/guys still have to be at fault or be pathetic just because we're talking about girls' behavior so you can feel better about it.
Also, you have cases where the guys don't know the girl they're interested in is into bad boys until it later comes up or comes out. Furthermore, unlike women, decent guys don't want to change those girls, they want to be accepted by them, which is why I'm telling guys that it's a waste of time to bother with them.
"and you want it to be that a guy/guys still have to be at fault or be pathetic just because we're talking about girls' behavior so you can feel better about it."
Uh no, I don't have anything to "feel better about" just because I think the girls and the guys in those situations are equally stupid. If the guy finds out later then that's fine, obviously you can't always foresee something like that. But a pathetic amount of them keep pining after the girl even after finding out, despite the fact that she also most likely treats them like shit.
Wanting to be accepted by someone who doesn't really care about you is just about as pathetic as wanting to change someone who's "bad". Both fights are equally pointless and will end in the person getting hurt.
You're right in the fact that it's a waste of time to bother with girls who are obsessed with bad guys. But I'm just saying that guys who are obsessed with girls who are obsessed with bad guys, are pretty pathetic too.
Which, is something they rarely want to take any responsibility for - which is why I'm bringing it up. Instead of being like "hey, I'm kinda acting like a loser and I need to get over this girl asap", they're like "OMG girls only like BAD GUYS not NICE GUYS like mE!! Boohoo".
"Uh no, I don't have anything to "feel better about" just because I think the girls and the guys in those situations are equally stupid."
- It's because you want them to be equally stupid when that is not very much the case.
Guys are not obsessing over girls who like bad guys. Guys are feeling disappointed or discouraged because so many girls around them are wanting badboys, and they feel like no one will want them, even though there are other great girls out there. THAT is what they are consumed by.
Pf. Kinda sad to see that you won't admit that they're just as desperate as the girls pining after the bad guys.
"and they feel like no one will want them, even though there are other great girls out there."
Obsessed an pathetic.
You WANT me to view them the same as you do because you want them to be in the same lot.
That disappointment is really no less different than any girl who feels like guys don't want her because she's too quiet or decent. It's a human emotion, and there's really nothing desperate or pathetic about it.
I disagree.
There's a difference between being desperate and feeling like you aren't good enough. Not even close to being the same thing.
@FýrdracaDócincel Exactly the point I was trying to make. Well said.
Bad Boys are like slutty dress/easier girls to guys.
You are drawn to them as they are exciting and wild... but you also know they aren't good for you and NOT marriage material.
Sadly girls end up having kids with the "Bad Boys" and end up being single moms with no $$ No future for her and her kids... Story of the USA... Since the 60's feminist movement.
but what's funny is that , not all girls who are attracted to bad guys dress up as sluts, they are often pretty formal.
@lacorine197 "but what's funny is that , not all girls who are attracted to bad guys dress up as sluts".
True... normally it's "OPPOSITES ATTRACT" The conservative girl wants the bad boy. Nerdy Guy is attracted to the dominate slut.
You're a good writer, probably should utilize it.
So what percentage of girls would say like bad boys then? I mean Romance novels are full of Bad Boy archetypes.
When you say young girls when is it these girls finally grow a brain and realize hey these guys are losers. Personally I see more teenage girls and girls in early 20s who have this bad boy obsession. Would you say they grow out of this bad boy phase once they reach around 25?
No, not even by then. I would say once they get even older, like mid-30s.
That is long time I must say. In your experience however what percentage of women would you say are drawn to bad boys, or its just safe to assume its cultural norm.
Ya know, I might agree that it's LOOSELY a cultural norm because of the stylization of bad boys. Though I would probably say about 65% of young women are into that.
See the problem with this is it completely disregards the fact the people are complex. I date people not sterotypes. Some of my best relationships have been with guys labelled the "bad boy" some of my worst with ones labelled "nice guy." People don't fit into neat little boxes and just because you can't see what someone sees in someone doesn't mean they are wrong for seeing it. I'd be more worried about distancing myself from someone who chooses to judge people based on ridiculous stereoypes rather then girls who appear to date "bad boys."
Haha...
Its in the name, "Bad *BOYS*"... Not men. Bad boys will get into bar scraps, maybe deal a little weed n white too, maybe ride a crotch rocket afforded by mummy and daddy, or a stolen bmw...
Bad *MEN* on the other hand, are in the real, visceral world, fighting the good fight, boning WOMEN who aren't insecure little girls thinking that a faux "tough guy" persona is the real deal. Bad MEN have fo make the toughest decisions in life, often times at the expense of their own livelihoods, getting into all kinds of social, political, cultural and economic strife - for the long term betterment of his family, friends and country. A bad MAN maybe a killer, but for good reason, and he definitely prefers a cruiser motorcycle like an 883 sportster at the very least!
If I were a chick looking for virtue, I'd pick the latter over former...
I agree with you, especially the bit about age. Dealing with women chasing the bad boys in high school, sure, that's just what it is in high school. It's part of the growing experience. Dealing with women my age that fall for the bad boys is just not worth my time. If you're a grown adult (living on your own, paying bills, have a job, etc.) and you fall for some bad boy, that's just not someone I need in my life. Bye girl.
Here's what i think:
The higher a guy is on the social ladder, the more excuses girls will make to justify his behavior. Likewise the lower a guy is on the social ladder, the harder girls will try to condemn or downplay everything he does.
Deep down, every single one of us is a prick.
Me? Prick.
You? Prick.
The rest of your commentors? One big smelly bag of cocks.
So it really is best to just do whatever the hell you want and/or whatever you believe needs to be done. If the girls around you decide to bitch about how "terrible" a person you are, take it with grace.
You didn't do anything wrong, you're just not the guy they wanted to see doing it.
Your "rank" on the social ladder doesn't mean much for girls trying to talk to you
@frozenhorizon Maybe not. But it means a hell of a lot for how much you can "get away with" asserting yourself. If a girl thinks you're an asshole or something similar because you got what you wanted, she would have been disgusted with you no matter what you did anyway.
You know...
cf.girlsaskguys.com/.../...b8c5-e91984296631-m.jpg
I leave such girls to such boys because let's face it, they want
(stupid smartphone again...)
They want each other. Since i am not that kind of guy i will leave them both to it. They probably even deserve each other.
In the meantime i am still a single virgin, who never had a girlfriend but doesn't really mind. If i find a good woman, then that's great. If not then there is no harm.
The way i see rejection is their loss, not mine.
I just live my life the way it is.
Sure, it gets lonely at times and sometimes i get frustrated or sad but hey, that's life. I grow strong of all of that. Luckily porn is keeping me in check and holding me together as a substitute. It works at least.
Bingo.
damn I wish I would've saw life so much simpler the way you see it when I was younger.
@lacorine197 Worry not my friend! You came just around the right time. Waste no more of your time on undeserving females ;)
i like someone who i think will prtect me and stand up for me a guy standing up for you is great my boyfriend one time went off on this guy for looking at me because the guy was being a pervert and that was so great, and guys that are actively chasing a female with flowers and compliments are the problem not nice guys, like you make the girl feel like she's better than you and i want someone who is actually real like someone with a personality other than just being nice like my boyfriend being nice to me and treating me right is usper important but so is him having a personality and standing up for me
I love men who have everything together.. men who work, who have a sense of humor, who appreciate a submissive woman...
That's me 😉
This was great. Personally i find it ridiculous all these girls who hang out with "bad boys" I tend to socialise with neither. I have a gentlemen of a boyfriend and wouldn't ask for any different.
I don't like bad boys. I also don't like 'nice guys' because most are white knights or they're just push overs. A good balance is better.
I don't think you can balance good with bad. I think what you want is what I call a 'decent' guy.
You can balance it by finding someone who's not a push over and someone who's exciting. Bad boys are always assholes. Sometimes they're exciting people.
And the excitement is what I said was ridiculous. Chicks get excited by these guys for all the wrong reasons.
Like I said though, an exciting person isn't necessarily bad. I want someone who keeps me excited. I don't want someone who just goes through the motions of life because that's not what I'm about.
I guess it depends on your definition of what's exciting, because a lot of these girls want momentary, senseless thrills, quick entertainment and laughs in a hate-myself moment, danger and defiance.
Is that exciting to you?
I love how you like to put everything into tiny definitions of what is and isn't what girls should want or do want. It's pathetic. I used to think you were cool and actually weren't a misogynist but clearly I was wrong. 'These girls'. I assume you're throwing me into that definition, cause we're all the same right?
I'm not putting you into any box, I'm seriously asking you, not labelling you.
I try to break things down so people can understand a little better, not to box one person into something.
'These girls'. Is a definition, a box.
And someone exciting doesn't mean momentary, senseless thrills. I can be more than just monotony.
'These girls' is A box for THOSE girls. Putting all females in one box would be me saying 'all girls.'
I can't believe this is upsetting you so much. That's not like you.
And I thought it wasn't like you to be a misogynist and yet here we are.
This isn't misogyny. Misogyny would be me saying 'I hate women and think they're all terrible.'
Moral of the story? Don't try to please anyone because it's a senseless balancing act. This isn't Goldilocks and the three faces of Dr Jackal.
You're basically saying we're all terrible because we choose terrible men. Which again, is women's fault and not men's for behaving poorly.
@Blonde401 I'm not necessarily saying you're terrible, but no one can force you to choose the guy you pick.
But again it's blaming women. Instead of saying men shouldn't behave that way, it's women's fault for dating them. In the same way it's a woman's fault if she gets raped or it's a woman's fault that she stays with an abuser when we all know there's a fucking lot of blame that should go on the man. Men are not innocent. And it's disgusting that this mentality is still around.
@Blonde401 Oh men certainly shouldn't behave that way, and many people have said as much. No one is teaching guys to be bad, but again, women are making the choices to date the ones who are. It IS all up to them in the end. Just because a guy is bad, doesn't mean she has to go with him. We could even argue that women are being misogynist to their own selves for picking them.
You do realise men don't start out as cunts right? They are nice and fun and lovely when they draw you in. Nobody dates an asshole who behaves that way on the first date. By then you've caught feelings etc. It's more complicated that you think.
@Blonde401 I'm not that complicated unfortunately, I'm perfectly capable of looking like an (unintentional) bellend on any occassion, let alone saving it for a first date! ;p;
@AndrewMG 😂 We all can man!
Bad Boy = Saturn.
He will ruin your life. Nobody, likes bad things isn't it?
A bad boy could harm you mentally and physically.
A bad boy can have sex with many girls and women besides married to you.
A bad guy can cheat you and can have an aggressive personality.
Bad guys don't respect their girls because they are already having sex with other girls, then why he may be worried? lol.
Um can't say I ever liked bad boys when I was 14 I liked a boy who was sweet as can be his hair was 2 toned though and a few weeks later he shaved his head and Started ignoring me acting a real ass to everyone I was like um no we are done here I'm not dealing with a brat