Attractive Faces Don't Dictate Beauty

[Sheriblossom]

This is not to try and offend anyone out there who thinks that I am being judgmental and rude. I'm expressing my own opinion, and my own take on what I think is the difference between these two terms. Physical attractiveness is only an aspect of beauty.

I believe that these two terms often get misused; to the point that they lose their meaning and value. I think being beautiful is vastly different from having an attractive face or body. Deep down, I think that most people agree with me, even if they don't think so. But hopefully I can show you what I mean.

The other day, my teacher was talking about Picasso. I'm sure many people have probably heard of him. If you aren't familiar with his paintings, I have added some below.

My teacher admitted to the fact that he doesn't think all of Picasso's art is attractive in an artistic light. I noticed that he worded that very carefully. I agree that Picasso's art isn't very attractive. However, my teacher said that every artist has their own style, and that's what made Picasso stand out in the art world; his originality and creativity is what makes his work...Beautiful.

I understand that a majority of the people reading this would like me to make a clear point. This is the message I want to communicate.

I see so many people asking people to rate their attractiveness. I ask people for rates too. I get many positive comments, and lots of guys and also girls tell me I'm attractive. But there are guys that tell me I'm not attractive too. The problem is when a girl (that society standards deem as unattractive whether it is facial or body features) ask people if she is beautiful. It would not be "correct" to say that she isn't beautiful. Every human is their own piece of art. It's lack of attractiveness in your eyes doesn't mean it's not beautiful. Beauty is such a broad term, and it shouldn't been determined by physical beauty.

I've heard stories about girls who had birthmarks or scars on their faces. I know people who are flawed, and I am one of them. Everyone; even the most hottest models in the world are flawed (even if it's not shown through their body or face). So if everyone is flawed, and imperfect, then what do we define as beauty? "Ugly" people can be beautiful too. Another example I want to share is this. If I asked you to choose between a less attractive girl with a great personality, or a hot girl that treats everyone like sh*t, please tell me which one is more beautiful. If you chose the 2nd option as more beautiful, you may be judging both girls based only on their face and body, as being beautiful and not what that person is really like. Beauty involves more than just what appears to the eye (even though physical attractiveness is also important). That's also why makeup and looking good isn't the only important thing to most people these days. It's hard for people to want to continue interesting with you unless you are beautiful on the inside.

I believe that everyone is beautiful. and I'm not lying. But will admit that I don't think everyone is attractive. But I'm glad that I can distinguish between those two terms, I don't have to hide what I think.

Share your thoughts below :) I'd love to talk more about this concept. Perhaps someone could convince me to see if from their point of view! -Sherry

[cherryphi82]

I know what you're getting at but I have to disagree with you again. You cannot change or deny that people judge attractiveness by the outside. Not that there aren't exceptions, but to most people, looks are important. Neither is personality as clear-cut as you say. I hear this so often about the proverbial less attractive girl with a heart of gold and the pretty girl who's a bitch. Not only does this get old, it's a strawman. I really don't see a point of mentioning it unless you're jealous of people who are more attractive than you. Not everyone is appealing to everyone. Get used to the fact. Some people called you ugly. If I had a dime for every time that a guy called me ugly, especially online, I'd be rich. Nobody deserves to be called beautiful just because. Beauty is earned, just like respect.

[Sheriblossom]

hmm, you made some interesting points! :) I appreciate it! but I;d just like to know: if beauty is earned, who's calling the shots and defining beauty? Just because some people don't see the beauty in something doesn't mean it isn't beautiful or appreciated by other people. I personally don't view beauty as being only sunshine and rainbows. Beauty can be horrible depending on what the thing is. and I admit, I have standards when it comes to a guy. I am not attracted to every guy. but that's vastly different form saying that a guy isn't beautiful. Even the most horrible, "ugly", unwanted, and gruesome things in the world have their own beauty as bad as it sounds. I can accept that no everyone is going to find me physically appealing, but beauty alone is not determined by physical traits :)

[EnglishArtsteacher]

I don't think it matters much for straight men though. Women are far less visual than men are. I can see women finding a man "beautiful", or attractive in many ways.

[cherryphi82]

Right, there is an ethereal thing to it. If we get into the semantics, then attractiveness or comeliness are the words your looking for to define physical appeal. But to say that everything is beautiful is false. Yes, beauty is not just that which is comfortable. But there has to be a certain... tenderness to it, a grace. There are things in life which are decidedly awkward and unbeautiful, let's not kid ourselves about that. Also, to echo another commenter, why is beauty so important in the first place? What would make it so horrible for something, but especially, for a human being to be not beautiful? Is ugly really the worst thing you can be? Ugly is a part of life. It's a necessary part of life. You can't make it more attractive by going and saying that ugly is actually beautiful as well. Ugly is impressive in its own right, a force to be reckoned with. But no one wants to endure it or for it to stay around. I guess the real question here would be then

[cherryphi82]

... should we get more comfortable with that which is ugly and accept is as part of our lives. Not calling everything beautiful out of fear of its absence.

[cherryphi82]

@EnglishArtsteacher That's a bunch of bullshit. I want a man to look at. I would never date an ugly, dull looking dude.

[EnglishArtsteacher]

It's true for most women.

Look at famous rich people. You see conventionally unattractive, wealthy men with conventionally attractive women. Women are more likely to go for social status, and money. Maybe it's different in Switzerland, but here in the United States of America, that's not the case.

I see wealthy, fat, ugly guys with hot women. It happens quite often. However, men are more visual, and it never happens the other way around.

[cherryphi82]

@EnglishArtsteacher I live in the United States. I see fat, ugly women with attractive men all the time. It always depends on the register in which you circle.

[EnglishArtsteacher]

It doesn't really matter what we see, or not, because it's already biologically proven that men are more visual than women. I don't know one woman who would disagree. The only people who disagree with me on this are bitter man on this website.

Why do you think male doctors, lawyers, professional athletes, actors, etc. have no issues getting women? It's because of their money! My mom worked with doctors (she's a nurse) who would have women 20 years younger than them after them. And trust me, it wasn't for their looks.

[cherryphi82]

@EnglishArtsteacher Lol. You're like the majority of men on this site. You go by the truisms you want to believe instead of listening to what individual women say. You win the internet...

[cherryphi82]

@Sheriblossom One point you didn't address... if you think everything can be beautiful, then why include the uglygirl/goodheart/prettygirl/bitch example? According to your views, this pretty girl with an "ugly inside" is still beautiful because as you said, beauty isn't always sunshine and rainbows and can be unwanted and gruesome.

[EnglishArtsteacher]

Actually, I'm going by what women say. Most women disagree with you. I can poll most women anywhere on the internet, and they would agree that men are less visual than women. This is common knowledge I've known since I was 13 years old. Why do you think men ogle at women so much, and look at porn so much?

Of course, there are biologically proven facts from reliable sources.

If you want to, watch "The Science of Sex Appeal." It's on Netflix. They even did an experiment where they had a panel of women who rated men based on looks. The next panel of women rated the same men-except their income level was shown. The same "ugly" men were rated "attractive", because their income was shown.

I don't see how someone your age doesn't know this by now.

[cherryphi82]

@EnglishArtsteacher My only interest is what is true for me, and that disagrees with everything you're saying...

[EnglishArtsteacher]

That may be you. I was just saying that women in general aren't visual.

[cherryphi82]

@EnglishArtsteacher Then why include the lecture?

[OliviaDenny2000]

@EnglishArtsteacher The women on this website are so sheltered, and have no idea what they're talking about.

[cherryphi82]

@OliviaDenny2000 Speak for yourself.

[OliviaDenny2000]

I mean, you're denying the fact women have a higher beauty standard than men and that men are more visual. I don't know if you truly believe that, or that you're in denial since you know it's true subconsciously.

[cherryphi82]

@OliviaDenny2000 No, I'm saying that I go for guys who are physically appealing to me.

[OliviaDenny2000]

Okay but you also said that he should listen to what women say. And I know I'm not the only girl in this world who thinks men are too superficial about looks. I've noticed women your age are horny and visual like teen males though, so maybe it's just your age.

[cherryphi82]

@OliviaDenny2000 I feel sorry for you. Not only are you dumb, you seem to be the kind who never learns.

[cherryphi82]

@Sherriblossom Oh, and by the way, I'm an artist and there's shit that just repulses me. If you are meaning to say that there is still value in something that isn't beautiful, then we agree. But something doesn't have to have beauty in order to have value.

[EnglishArtsteacher]

I'm just going to assume you're a 35 year old single cat lady who sits inside the house all day. You're sheltered.

[cherryphi82]

@EnglishArtsteacher I'm married 16 years with four wonderful kids and a hard working husband :)

[ThisDudeHere]

"I believe that everyone is beautiful."

If everyone is beautiful then no one is. This modern trend of being overly "accepting" is just silly.

Yes, there are people who are more beautiful than others. Sexier than others. Stronger than others. More brave than others and etc. And what defines the peaks of said attributes is usually decided by an unspoke consensus of the majority, not by the wishful few.

And yes, that woman in the video, she is unfortunate but she is also ugly. That's just how it is. Is it fair? No. But that's life for you.

[Sheriblossom]

Okay, but form an artistic point of view, everything is it's own piece of art, and just because it doesn't appeal to anyone, it doesn't mean it's not beautiful in it's own original way.

[ThisDudeHere]

To any individual viewer, perhaps. But to claim that it is universally beautiful kinda negates a person's ability to disagree. If you say that everyone is beautiful, what does it mean for people that disagree? That their opinion is invalid?

[Sheriblossom]

for me, it just means that they haven't developed the ability to see beauty in all different kinds of things. I don't know how many people are artist out there, but as an art, you have to learn how to appreciate all forms of art

[ThisDudeHere]

I'm of the mind that your argument kinda doesn't make sense. You're implying that one has to learn to see beauty in everything? Then what do we even do with the word ugly? Get rid of it? I believe that I do not have to go out of my way to see beauty in stuff. That woman in the video, I'm sorry, she's not beautiful. Malevich's black square, I just don't consider art. I don't have to learn to appreciate either - I have to be free to see things as not-art and ugly because, if I can't, then the words ugly and beautiful lose their meaning.

Again, there's no point in everything being beautiful because, if so, then literally nothing is.

I understand that you have good intentions at heart to make people feel better by letting them know that they "also" are beautiful but that, in my humble opinion, leads to more damage than good. Certain people should learn to accept the reality that they are unattractive so that they could deal with it accordingly. They shouldn't live in delusions.

[Sheriblossom]

I understand your points :) and they are valid; even if I may not agree to all of them. Personally, I'm starting to see the divide between beautiful and ugly. I think they they are not really opposite terms as everyone thinks. For me, I aspire to see the beauty in something that is physically ugly. Ugly isn't really the correct term to use on a person other than to comment on physical appearances

[ThisDudeHere]

That I can agree with.

[Sheriblossom]

:) yay, I'm glad

[loveslongnails]

I can't agree with the "everything is beautiful in its own way" statement. For example, a painting of vomit, no matter how exact you get the colors or detail, isn't beautiful. LOL

[DianaWest]

you know, I think that even ugly people can become more physically beautiful if they have good personalities. And I don't understand what you mean by, "everyone is beautiful, but not everyone is attractive." Those words are synonymous, or at least according to many dictionaries.

[DianaWest]

@loveslongnails ok, but even ugly people are humans with feelings. Maybe "vomit" would not be a very good comparison. and to me, a person, regardless of how ugly, really does become more attractive if they have good personalities. I have been called beautiful, but I also know a few "beautiful" people who look downright ugly because of their shitty personality.

[ThisDudeHere]

@DianaWest then they're just good people. Beautiful is mostly a physical attribute.

[cherryphi82]

@Sheriblossom Sorry to bud in here... but this is interesting. So you do think there's an objective standard of beauty? At least that's what this implies. You are saying that objectively speaking, everything is beautiful in its own way, people just disagree. If we see it from this perspective, you basically are saying anyone who disagrees is subjectively right but objectively wrong because "it' is still beautiful by some universal, all-encompassing standard. Which goes back to the discussion we've had at the beginning... it's like you're saying there is no objective beauty as society sees it (or the simply the majority) but it's the way YOU say it... with which you then impose your own standard of beauty?

[Anon-ymous1]

@ThisDudeHere Well said.

[DianaWest]

@cherryphi82 Hmm, I don't know if this is what she meant to say, but I would like to think that everyone has something about them that is beautiful. Even the most ugliest, most hideous person who by "objective standards" is deemed so by the majority, I still think that at least 1 or 2 people WILL find that person beautiful. I don't believe in that sappy "beauty is only skin deep shit," as it somehow implies that people who are objectively beautiful have nothing else going for them, but I do believe that everyone has at least one quality that is beautiful about them. Maybe their face is not, but maybe they have gorgeous, thick, luscious hair, or beautiful big eyes, or a really hot body, or a wrinkle free, smooth face. See, everyone has at least one trait, and sure, as absurd as it may sound to some people, even if you think something is ugly, another person will think it is beautiful. After all, what is that cheesy saying, "one man's junk is another man's treasure" or something likethat

[DianaWest]

I think that is partially true, but haven't you ever felt that someone you thought was hideous upon first glance became more physically attractive because they were good people? I am not trying to be sappy or cheesy, I honestly do feel this way. For instance, I am crushing on a guy who is not the most beautiful man in the world. Some, by their standards (my Mom's) would even call him unattractive, but I find him attractive. Especially since he is so smart, kind, and well rounded. He is a photographer and is a student in university as well, and he has a sick sense of humour. Funnier than most comedians, I swear. Hell, he beats Amy Schumer's ass any day. And maybe it is just my infatuation, but he did actually become more physically attractive (for me at least). I think the worst combination on someone is to be ugly on the inside and outside, unfortunately I've met too many people like this.

[DianaWest]

Last comment I swear: I agree with the whole thing about objective beauty, someone who is objectively unattractive may always be considered so by the majority upon first glance. I just thought it important to include that previous bit.

[cherryphi82]

@DianaWest Hmm.. no offense but what you said goes exactly into the territory you tried to avoid. You say that you don't believe beauty is only skin deep, or that everyone has at least one beautiful quality, and then go on to elaborate nothing but physical markers of attractiveness. I thought the discussion here was that beauty was something more than just physical.

[Phoenix98]

That's just not true I am afraid and @ThisDudeHere makes valid points on that.

And there is an actual standard for beauty it's called the golden ratio if you took a human that fits it and you viewed that person to the mass majority of people that person would be aesthetically pleasing to see with our eyes.

This ratio is also used in virtually everything in the world to.

Attraction is simply mathematics, measurements, eyes not being to far apart or to close, a forehead that isn't to tall or to shallow, hips, just right, etc, etc.

This can be proven just by the fact that the greatest masterpieces in the art world are perfectly aligned with the ratio, I myself use it to create perfectly pleasing paintings where everything is placed just right and looks visually perfect.

You can even find this ratio on a microscopic level within plants and nature.

Everyone would like to believe that beauty is subjective and that everyone has their individual tastes but in reality that's really true.

[Sheriblossom]

it's funny, because according to humans, humans are the most complicated things in the world. and according to our own standard, mathematics and science dictate beauty but it really doesn't. I don't go up to a tree and judge how straight all the limbs are. I can appreciate the beauty of all the parts of the tree and its differences with other trees. All the standards we compare everything to was made by us. Think about it, we kill animals because we believe we are more important than them. lots of it also relates to religion, but again, not all people believe in it.

[Phoenix98]

No not our standard, natures, scientists have actually found this golden ratio this mathematical equation on a microscopic scale encoded into the DNA of plants like flowers and tree's and other things. This same equation was used by the Greeks to dedicate beauty, same for architects, personal trainers, bodybuilders and artists.

That's because your looking at a tree with a equation revolving around perfection encoded into it.

The Golden Ratio was not created by mankind, we merely discovered it.

Mmmm no we kill animals to survive we always have, we created clothing to protect ourselves in hard environments out of animals and food to fill our bellies in places where crops couldn't be farmed.

And we currently kill animals to eat them because farming is unsustainable alone for our ever increasing and large populations.

[Phoenix98]

You can of course fight agaisnt it, but what's there is there, it was there long before us and the ratio will be there long after us.

[Sheriblossom]

that's interesting, the ratio thing. But at the end of the day, everyone is just making the assumption we are more powerful than the rest. But you made good points :)

[Stoner710]

Beauty isn’t here I am at the beholder. The standard of beauty goes back for thousands of years When the Romans made sculpture of been as they made her perfect that is the ic when the Romans made sculpture of being as they made her perfect. Why not the statue of David was sculpted the artist made him look perfect. This is where our standard of beauty comes from.

Outward beauty is very important in society especially when it comes to breeding most humans are not going to go for the big girls we want somebody who is healthy and attractive looking we don’t care what your personality is like we’re guys for all we care i outward beauty is very important in society especially when it comes to breeding most humans are not going to go for the big girls we want somebody who is healthy and attractive looking we don’t care what your personality is like we’re guys for all we care you could be a total bitch as long as you have a hot body sweet We don’t care. This is how society runs doesn’t matter how attractive your personality is if you’re ugly you’re not going to find a man or a girl that’s life. It’s cool when a women like that one that has pojeria can model but let face it she not going to find a man and if she does it’s for her money not her looks

[Sheriblossom]

I never said looks didn't matter, it actually matters quite a bit to me. Guys probably wouldn't flirt with me if they didn't think I was somewhat attractive, and tbh I usually only talk to guys I'm attracted to in some way. But it's not to say someone that I'm not attracted to is not beautiful. the standards we follow for beauty is made by us. We are the ones defining what beauty is. But as an artist, you just have to learn to admire art of all shapes and forms even if it's not attractive.

[Stoner710]

If we’re just talking the word beauty then we have many standard of beauty. I have my Rainer in view every day when I wake up that’s beauty. If we’re talking humans yes there is inward beauty but that’s not what we talk about I don't know if you’ve ever heard of Susan boyal (probably spelled it wrong) She has a beautiful voice but she’s not nice to look at.

[Sheriblossom]

true, but something I learned as an artist is to see something ugly as beautiful ( not seeing beuaty in something ugly, but actually seeing something that is ugly as something that is also beautiful), I am attracted to guys wiht nice faces and stuff, but the concept I;m addressing isn't about which one is more preffered. It's about the defiition of beauty itself. Beauty sholdnt be deterrmined by what we want to see, its an open minded process

[Stoner710]

I think I’m getting. Kinda like me with possums I think there cute and badass (especially since they’ve been around since the Jurassic period

[Aki6000]

It is a really nice mentality to have. However I believe it is also somewhat unrealistic. The thing that constitutes most relationships is the physical attraction of them both to each other. It is not the only factor but it is certainly one of the foundations; that said, personality is just as important as the physical attraction.
I feel people like to emphasise one's importance over the other but I do not believe that to be the case; if either one is missing a relationship will most likely break up or not form at all. Referencing your example about two women, one with a bad personality and the other you percieve to be unattractive, realistically speaking, most people wouldn't go for either.
When admiring pictures that do not seem to have much beauty to them you may eventually get used to it and see the meaning and uniqueness behind it, however romantic love is not as simple. As unpleasant as it is to talk about, romantic love is based primarily on the human urge to reproduce, conducted through hormones which create sexual drives. Perception of physical attractiveness is generally a way for a man to find the right woman to raise their child; in more modern times personality is more emphasised but it simply cannot and will not overtake physical attraction in MOST cases unless we find some way to transcend beyond the flesh. Lets be honest, that's never going to happen.

[Sheriblossom]

I never said the physical beauty wasn't important. tbh I usually don't continue to talk to guys unless I somewhat liked how they looked, and the things they talked about. and I don't doubt that physical beauty is really important to everyone, and in relationships. Personally, I'm starting to see the divide between beautiful and ugly. I think they they are not really opposite terms as everyone thinks. For me, I aspire to see the beauty in something that is physically ugly. Ugly isn't really the correct term to use on a person other than to comment on physical appearances. I'm not talking about which aspect is more important in a relationship, just saying people shouldn't uses physical appeal as the standard of all the beauty in the world; some of which many of us lack the skill to appreciate, including me. but I am learning

[Aki6000]

Hmm I've been thinking about the 'learning to appreciate' part and I just want to ask: how do you know whether what you achieve in the end is really that or is it simply the ability to 'tolerate' what is generally considered inattractive? I mean even when you look at anything that seems unattractive, if you continue to expose yourself to it then you will develop a tolerance to it and it would seem less unattractive. However if you stop your exposure to such things, you would once again return to percieving it as unattractive.
To summarise, do you think there's a way to understand and appreciate rather than merely tolerate what is generally considered not attractive?

[Sheriblossom]

Sure, :) but learning to appreciate everything has a subtle art to it. You can't be close minded, nor can you let your personal ideas of attractiveness affect you during the process. It's not a simple idea to unpack in just a singular paragraph. I think appreciating things you don't like it important because thats how you know once you find something very stunning.

[Aki6000]

I'll keep that in mind. In any case I do hope you can eventually achieve this goal because it's nice to know there are people like you who are willing to be open minded on such matters 😊

[Sheriblossom]

:) thank you for putting time into discussing my writing and thinking! Have a lovely day!

[BuchitaBuchys]

I'm sorry, but I don't know why it's ok so "bad" to say to people aren't beautiful, but we are ok to say if we're not athletic, we aren't funny, we aren't smart etc. Why is beauty the most controversial qualitty to lack?

Personally, I dont feel that everyone is beautiful, if everyone is beautiful then no one is beautiful. There would be no point of having a distinguishing word if everyone possessed it. But there are 2 different forms of beauty, subjective and objective in my opinion. Objective is more like what the general consensus regards to as beautiful, it doesn't mean you HAVE to have these traits, but typically these are the most aesthetically appealing to most people. Like clear skin, for example. Yea. you may find some random person who prefers acne, but overall, most would prefer clear skin. Subjective is individual, like that one weirdo who prefers acne, or the BBW fetishizer, most fetishes fall into this category as they go for unconventional beauty or standards outside of the norm.

These are just my 2 cents. I dont wanna come across as offensive. Not everyone is attractive physically, but that isn't a bad thing. And I wish we were in a society that instead said "everyone is beautiful" to a more realistic "not everyone is beautiful, but you still matter".

[EnglishArtsteacher]

I think everyone is beautiful to someone, it's just that some people are considered "beautiful"(or handsome) to many many many many more people than others. Someone like Megan Fox (just an example I'm using) is considered "beautiful" by nearly the entire population. It's very rare to find someone who doesn't find her pretty. On the other hand, Kathy Bates is conventionally unattractive from a physical standpoint. It would be very very rare to find someone who would disagree with that.

And since I'm a man, we don't have to worry about our looks as much, since straight women are less visual in general.

[OliviaDenny2000]

I've had so many people tell me I'm beautiful, but I just see a fat, ugly girl in the mirror. I have a permanent duck face, and I need to lose weight.

[RationalMale]

"Every human is their own piece of art. It's lack of attractiveness in your eyes doesn't mean it's not beautiful. Beauty is such a broad term, and it shouldn't been determined by physical beauty."

If everyone is beautiful, no one is. The fact that beautiful is an adjective literally means that is describes people who are not the average, not default.

It's like calling someone "brave." The default person isn't brave. Brave is someone who rises above the average and does things that soooo many people would be too afraid to do.

Beauty of the soul is indeed something. There are people with amazing personalities, or who are particularly kind, or noble, or overall are remarkable beings.

But "Beautiful" unless you're being specific, means someone is very attractive. Beauty also relates to great genetics--because finding beauty in the opposite sex is related to reproduction on a core level. Beautiful women are a combination of living healthy, and great genes.

You can lie and say "every human is a work of art! Every human is beautiful!" but in the end, that's feel good lies. Some humans are very attractive. Some humans are definitely not nearly as attractive. That's reality.

[Aki6000]

Indeed, trying to bend the perception of the people to something as simple as physical beauty is just not going to work. I think one cannot 'learn' to percieve something as beautiful, at most it will merely 'tolerating' it and even then that will wear off very fast when not constantly exposed to it. Perhaps there are a few who can naturally appreciate what most feel as unattractive but the reality is that most do not feel that way and unfortunately there's nothing that can be done to change that.

[Sheriblossom]

@Aki6000 I like to see it from my Picasso example: just because something doesn't appeal to you in anyway possible, doesn't mean it's not beautiful. There lots of beauty in this world that not every will be able to appreciate, and that includes me. I am trying to learn to appreciate things that don't appeal to me, especially because that helps me to be grateful when I find something stunning :)

[Sheriblossom]

just saying, I think both of the girls you posted on there are beautiful; beautiful in their own ways. Not everything is about sex appeal or physical appearances. that's only an aspect of beauty it's not the whole story

[RationalMale]

Ehhhh I think you're trying to be nice and do that thing of everyone is beautiful. It's not true. It's like those feedies who say massively obese people are beautiful. They're not.

[Sheriblossom]

I'm not trying to pretend to be nice, not naming what, but really horrible undesired things in this world also have their own beauty, it just depends on who appreciates those things. People tend to get the impression that beauty is sunshine and rainbows when it really doesn't have to always be like that

[BuchitaBuchys]

Ughhhh. I can't believe I actually agree with this guy. Damn you OP for making me agree with this dude :(

[Sheriblossom]

@BuchitaBuchys everyone thinks differently so I'm okay with it :) whatever floats ya goat

[EnglishArtsteacher]

I think you're confusing the terms beauty, and attractive, because you have them flipped

What you're trying to say is, that a face doesn't dictate ATTRACTIVENESS. Beauty is defined as something that is aesthetically pleasing, where as attractive can be physical, or emotional.

With that being said, I agree with what you're saying. Physically speaking, I would actually have a hot body than a hot face. I love big butts, slim waists, and big boobs on women. Thin girls are cute too, but I prefer curvy girls. A curvy girl with an ugly face is better than a non-curvy girl, and a cute face. I don't prefer overweight women, but if they have a cute face,

Most men are visual though, so they won't understand this.

[Sheriblossom]

I don't expect everyone to agree with me, everyone will have different opinions :) I'm and art student, and part of the thing you learn in art is to appreciate all art in a different way; even if you don't like it or find it appealing

[Anonymous]

I know that I am considered physically attractive, without wanting to sound over confident. And you are right, every human is beautiful, but not every human is physically attractive. It's the way of the world, as awful as it sounds. For example, I work with a girl who is almost exactly like me, blonde hair, blue eyes, almost same height and build, but I am considered more physically attractive, but I find her personality so beautiful and her confidence in herself makes her more beautiful. I also know that I have a beautiful personality, as being told on the regular. But just because a person is less attractive than other shouldn't mean anything. There will always be someone more or less attractive than you.

However you look, be confident. Love yourself, love your imperfections, because I find those are the most intriguing aspects to a persons features.
I don't have perfectly straight teeth, the fittest body or the clearest skin. but I still have guys knocking over each other for 10 minutes of my attention. Confidence is key baby

[Anonymous]

I had a friend who well is not my friends anymore for various reasons and this is one of them - She would go around the town that I live in and look at people and say "Oh my god, she's so ugly or oh my god she's so fat" and then whenever I saw someone who I thought was really pretty she would laugh at me and tell me that I'm blind. She only thought she was beautiful, but as you were saying, she isn't nice on the inside so therefore she isn't technically beautiful. My other friend would laugh when someone with obvious special needs would walk pass (like down syndrome). She is 15 and she still does this. But they are beautiful inside, and outside. People now a days are so insecure on how they look that they have to judge what other people look like. I agree with you that everyone is beautiful in their own way. There is a difference in the word pretty and beautiful. Pretty is if your face looks nice, but whose to say what a nice face looks like? How can we know what the ideal face looks like because everyone is unique and different so who is to say that one person is ugly and one person is pretty. Beautiful is a much more powerful word and only should be used if your talking about someones ins and outs. If they are a nice person, caring, loving, loyal etc. It's much more important to be beautiful in the inside than pretty on the outside.

I really liked your question and I feel so strongly towards that.

[Mr_Smile]

Beauty is such a subjective term. You may think yourself attractive, and many others may too, but some people will not find you attractive. I personally think some people are just not beautiful, physical or otherwise. Maybe a disapable human being who take thousands of pounds from people to spread lies and manipulate people, or maybe I just don't find them physically attractive. But people I don't find attractive, someone else might. I actually think that woman is somewhat attractive. She's no Marilyn Monroe, but even so I think she is somewhat physically attractive, and her strength and refusal to give up in the face of such a terrible illness is amazing and gives her an attractive personality. However, I'm sure there are people who don't think she is good looking at all, and maybe just don't like her as a person. It's completely subjective really.

But overall, this was a rather interesting read and I enjoyed it. Thank you for sharing :)

[Sheriblossom]

:) I like to see it from my Picasso example: just because something doesn't appeal to you in anyway possible, doesn't mean it's not beautiful. There lots of beauty in this world that not every will be able to appreciate, and that includes me. I am trying to learn to appreciate things that don't appeal to me, especially because that helps me to be grateful when I find something stunning :)

[Mr_Smile]

I don't neccessarily agree with that perspective. If you believe that, that's fine, I'm not going to try and say your view on the world is wrong or anything, but I believe it is important to recognise when something is just not beautiful. Modern art today for example often uses the excuse that "it's abstract" and "it has a deeper meaning". Someone made a sculptre by throwing some wood and literal horse shit in a pile. Is that beautiful? Debatable.

With Picasso, most of his work does not interest me. He has some stuff that's ok I guess, but a lot of just doesn't appeal to me because it looks like a child who just learnt what shapes are started scribbling on some paper. If other people like it, then sure, I think you have odd taste, but we are different people with different opinions, and this is why I think beauty is subjective and not everything is beautiful, at least not from my perspective.

[Sheriblossom]

:) interesting view! But I actually believe that beauty is not always positive, horrible and gruesome things in this world still have their own beauty even if they are not desired by other people

[Ayer93]

The definition of beautiful is: pleasing the senses or mind aesthetically. Everyone's perception of what beautiful is, whether it's personality or physical attractiveness is different and therefore beauty is a subjective concept and literally "in the eye of the beholder." However, people also tend to have similar perceptions of what beauty is, which is why there are people who are considered "beautiful" by many. That is why we have universal standards of beauty. Social media has made us very aware of our preference in "taste." We are all not created equal. That is the sad truth of life. Going by your logic of everyone being beautiful, that means a psychotic serial killer with a disfigured face and body is also beautiful. I disagree with you entirely.

[Sheriblossom]

beauty is a dangerous term, In my opinion it's not sunshine and rainbows as we always perceive it

[apple24]

You can put lipstick on a pig and it's still just a pig. What I'm trying to say is it doesn't matter beauty is everything. Everyone has an ideal standard of beauty. People will look at beautiful girl as the goal in life. No one care if she stupid or has a bad personality as long as she looks good. Blame it on our human brain. By the way, I dated a guy based on his heart and no matter how much I try I didn't want to kiss him! I didn't want be seen with him but I gave him a try... and I was wrong. Beauty as well as personality is important. I am sure U already knew. But it's also hard to find a beautiful girl with a wonderful personality.

[Sheriblossom]

many people are misusing the term that I am trying to clarify. You should've said "its hard to find a attractive girl with a wonderful personality" because in my whole MyTake, I'm addressing that fact that I believe beautiful and attractiveness/ physical appeal is very different

[apple24]

What I am trying to say is that just because someone is ugly doesn't mean they have a beautiful personality

[Sheriblossom]

I never said that. but something could literally be unattractive on the outside, AND on the inside and it could still be beautiful. Art is not always appealing. But sometimes the flaws and horrible-ness of it is what makes it beautiful. Beauty is not always sunshine and rainbows.

[apple24]

I guess so that was just my my two cent.

[Sheriblossom]

:) everyone thinks differently, nothing wrong with it. I'm not saying I'm right and your wrong, I'm just expressing a point of view

[apple24]

Meh I am just tired

[EnglishArtsteacher]

Wait... a guy actually dated you? I mean, a man dated the most sheltered girl in the world? Lol.

[gentlemanscholar]

Thank you, for your thoughtful and engaging article. I agree with the point you make about how both beautiful and attractive have been completely misused and applied in regards to the way these words are defined and how they are interchangeably used. Particularly, in relation to describing a persons physical appearance.
However, I would say that the difference between the word, attractive is that it is by nature subjective in how people perceive it. Whereas, beauty is by its nature more to do with the qualities of an individual, such as the beauty of their mind or musical talent.

[Anonymous]

I can see what you're saying, but it all boils down to this: something can be "beautiful in its own way", but that doesn't make it desirable to anyone.

This is basically the female version of the "nice guy" mentality. Im ugly, but I'm "beautiful in my own way", so someone owes it to me to give me a relationship. And most of the time, the women who claim this sort of entitlement have some ugly guy close to them who would treat them right in a relationship, but she rejects him because "handsome in his own way" isn't good enough for her; she's not attracted to him, no matter how good he is on the inside.

[Sheriblossom]

I don't know how attractive I am, but I;d say every guy I've mostly encountered just wanted my pics and to sext and flirt honestly. It's fun but I really get annoyed by it

[Opinion Owner]

Men these days generally have nothing to talk about other than video games or a sport someone else is playing or maybe a tv show or movie series. They have nothing to use for a conversation other than sex.

[Sheriblossom]

I feel worthless to be used just to talk about sex, I wish guys would realize that about me

[Opinion Owner]

Try to spark up a deeper conversation. If they can't hang, then don't waste your time

[Sheriblossom]

haha i feel like jet gonna fail that test

[Opinion Owner]

Most will. Most people haven't had a thought deeper than "what to eat for lunch" in years.

[Sheriblossom]

lmao "... turrrkeey sandwichhhhh"

[Poppykate]

@asker I am going to have to agree with you on that one. But maybe men need to just get off the couch... 🤔

[Sheriblossom]

@Poppykate lol

[VaIiant]

You’re confusing beauty and attractiveness. Your physical appearance is all that matters on the scale of beauty, but attractiveness can stem from any number of things. On that note, facial symmetry and being healthy (combined they equal attractiveness) is all that matters in beauty. We’re designed that way. And don’t give us that “everyone is beautiful” bullshit. No one actually believes that, and certainly not you. So was Mao beautiful? How about Stalin?

[IlyaTheImpaler]

Stalin yes 11/10 beauty

[desidoll]

I agree. I like it how people think beauty is "subjective" when you need to possess certain *features* to be called beautiful.

[ElvenMr]

Did you see young Stalin tho? Looks like male models today.

[LazyDork]

Merriam-Webster defines "beauty" as "the quality or aggregate of qualities in a person or thing that gives pleasure to the senses or pleasurably exalts the mind or spirit". This is involves more than just having an appealing physicality.

[Cosytoasty]

1.bp.blogspot.com/.../young_Stalin_1.jpg

Stalin *was* actually a hottie 😂

[Sheriblossom]

Sure, science can prove that you're right on facial symmetry and stuff like that. But I feel like that's in terms of physical attractiveness. The art of being beautiful is way more complicated than everyone thinks. Tbh, just because someone has a nice face, it doesn't mean they are automatically more beautiful than someone with a less attractive face. It just means the other person less physically appealing.

[VaIiant]

@Cosytoasty you make a fantastic point

[Cosytoasty]

Maybe just me, but I prefer the hot girl who treats everyone like shit. Although the caveat is that she is hot and smart.

The tolerance for bitchyness goes up way higher if she has a pretty face. An ugly chick who is bitchy and annoying gets no such leeway.

[Sheriblossom]

That's okay, everyone has their preferences :) and I agree with you, but I'm still sticking with my point that just because someone has a nice face doesn't mean they are automatically more beautiful than someone who is less physically appealing than them

[Cosytoasty]

Now since it’s impossible to get to know someone’s personality without interacting with them for some time, the only thing we can go is their looks, when *deciding* whether to get to know them or not.

- The ugly person will always be ugly no matter how nice they are.
- The attractive person will always be attractive AND has s 50/50 chance of being a wonderful person too.

My life is too short and I am a guy so I have to play the odds when it comes to dating because no girls are queuing up for me to pick. As a girl you likely have the luxury to pick and choose who’s personality you will get to know so yeah you do have time to try and see beyond looks.

[Sheriblossom]

I'm almost half your age, so I guess you could put it that way. I'm not encouraging people to stop going for people who are hot. and yes, people who are not physically attractive, will mostly remain that way. But I'm just saying beauty is not only skin deep. Refer back to the example I used of picasso. His paintings aren't physically attractive yet all of them put together would probably be more money than many of us could every make in our lives, and they are in museums and they are still considered "beautiful"

[ZELLxoxo]

'I believe that everyone is beautiful. and I'm not lying. But will admit that I don't think everyone is attractive.'

What's the difference between being beautiful and being attractive?

Anyways, I think you wrote a great and inspiring take so thank you :)

[Sheriblossom]

lol I already explained the difference between being beautiful and being attractive in my my take

[ZELLxoxo]

Ohhh 😀

[Caaarl]

If our ancient selves used the logic that everyone is just as beautiful as everyone else or everyone has beauty we would be extinct by now. Beauty is a part of biological fitness. People are looking to create the best children they can possibly can by breeding with the person that they think will strengthen their kin's gene pool. This everyone is beautiful bs is dangerous. It creates this illusion that each person is equally valuable which just isn't true.

[Sheriblossom]

I never mentioned anything about which is more desirable. Obviously I'm more attracted to hot guys than else attractive guys! and it has nothing to do with which I choose to marry. the point I'm making is that there is very beautiful ugly things out in this world.

[Caaarl]

@Sheriblosson not in my opinion beauty is used to liberally. Just because an ugly thing has something special about it doesn't make it beautiful.

[Sheriblossom]

That's interesting!!! You opened my mind up a bit!!! :)

[bubble_tea]

If you're ugly but have a great personality, you're not beautiful.
If you're pretty, but have a shitty personality, you're not beautiful either.
I think true beauty is exceptionally rare, therefore I don't believe everyone is beautiful.
People can have many positive attributes, but to be beautiful in my eyes, you need to possess inner AS WELL AS outer beauty... And both parts of beauty are absolutely subjective.. e. g. some like "bad boys", others like "good guys".
As the old adage goes, beauty is in the eye of the beholder.. it's true, and I'm a stingy beholder.

[Sheriblossom]

Okay, and it's fine if you view it that way :) I like to view it as "just because I am not attracted to something physically, or in terms of their personality, doesn't mean they aren't beautiful". I personally don't like guys that just sit there and "nerd out" about video games and don't do anything else with their life. I also do really like k pop that much. But that doesn't mean that person can't be beautiful. I just lack the ability to appreciate them. thats why I think everyone is beautiful. I think it's different from attractiveness. Refer to my Picasso example.

[bubble_tea]

Essentially, we're both saying "beauty is in the eye of the beholder" in different ways.

[Sheriblossom]

mh i guess? but I'm thinking "everyone is beautiful whether anybody likes it or not. though I admit not everything is attractive in my standards"

[bubble_tea]

I see the emperor's new clothes. I swear.

[szy_________]

I think that the human body is beautiful, which sounds really off the topic and random but this whole thing is just a difference on what you define as beauty. beauty by definition is: "the quality or aggregate of qualities in a person or thing that gives pleasure to the senses or pleasurably exalts the mind or spirit". Some people will find a person mind to be beautiful, some will only find the appearance to be beautiful, and that's completely okay. The lady in the video you linked isn't "beautiful" in appearance. it's the truth, don't deny it. But what she became because of this negative attribute she brought lights to people who are suffering from self-image and what not. You don't have to be attractive to be content with yourself. That's another thing I'd like to think about. You don't have to be good looking to be successful, or achieve your goal. Sure, people will be attracted to you and you will feel wanted and etc, but when you grow up that is not left with you. only your mind.

[Bananaman177]

You have to have beauty privilege to even think like this, so congratulations on winning the genetic lottery, but stop telling the teeming masses of ugly people that their suffering is imaginary just because it makes you feel bad.

[Sheriblossom]

... am I suppose to say thanks? But anyways, thank you, I appreciate the first part of your comment :) I'm not trying to make "ugly" people feel better, and I don;t know how they personally feel about themselves, but I'm just trying to acknowledge the fact that not all beauty is sunshine and rainbows and "perfect"

[cherryphi82]

This!

[Sheriblossom]

@cherryphi82 haha what? :)

[cherryphi82]

Yes. I think he expresses what I'm trying to say. You're not ugly enough to complain that there is an objective standard of beauty. By that same standard, you would be considered pretty. And I think that's what makes me suspicious about this take. You have to actually be ugly to make an appeal to this kind of cosmic justice.