Girlfriend hangs out with guy friend that likes her and hates me

[Anonymous]

My girlfriend has a guy friend that hates me for the simple reason of being her boyfriend. I have NEVER MET HIM lol ! He has admitted to having feelings for her but she still hangs out with him which pisses me off. Am I right to be upset and expect her not to be friends with him ?

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they went out when they were 13 she assures it was nothing serious and I believe her. She then moved and he got jealous for every boyfriend she had after him. when she moved back he put 'extra' effort into their friendship and she had suspicion he liked her

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a few months back he admitted to liking her for all those years shed left and even now he still does and then told her that's why he hates me. I know she wouldn't be with him but why would she keep a friend like that ?

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p.s. he gets more jealous then me when she clubs lol

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oh and we have been together for 6months

[katiec22]

I think you have every right to be upset about it. I dated a guy named "P" and we were only together for about 2 months but I had a guy friend "H" like that. He "H" hated the guy I was dating. He "H" was always telling me how I am too good for that guy and so on. He was constantly trying to convince me to break up with him and I ignored it. Well when the guy "H"and I finally broke things off he got worse. He thought we were going to date because I was hanging out with him, just as a friend! Well then the guy "P" and I starting talking again and my friend freaked out and told me it was stupid and that he "H" couldn't handle it anymore and started to freak out on me and send me weird texts, etc. He "H" then told me that I had to choose between "P" and him because I couldn't have both. He "H" then stopped talking to me and told everyone I was crazy. We haven't talked in a few months and lately he has started sending me texts again saying that he wishes that he had met me before "P" and things like that. I think your reaction is perfectly justified and that she needs to be careful!

[Asker]

What should I do though ?

[HaggardDiva]

No you aren't right to expect her not to be friends with him. He is her friend, and he is the one that is in the wrong for not liking you just because you are her boyfriend. But the thing that gets to me is that you haven't even met him. That's where this whole thing is messed up. I don't care if they are guys or girls, if they like her or not, you have the right to meet her friends. I don't think there are any friends of either mine or my boyfriends that the other hasn't met or at least that they can't meet if the opportunity were to arise. (There are friends that we haven't met but they are not around here so we can't.) You should very nicely insist on meeting this guy. Who knows maybe if you meet, he'll change his mind about you, and you about him. Good Luck!

[Shlei3]

Honestly if you were my boyfriend I would attempt to have you two meet. I would try to get things on a civil level. It's normal to be upset. What would you do if one of your girl friends didn't like your girlfriend and had feelings for you?

[Rafael151]

The other friend thing is hard to deal with, but it also matters if it works both ways. Does she try to keep you apart from your female friends? All can be cool if the rules are equal, but it seems risky at the same time. That is, what constitutes hanging out and why isn't she there with you and just briefly saying hellos with him and having some laughs. lt can't hurt to voice your feelings and see if she adjusts her behavior. But it depends on what kind or agreement you have and how long you've been together. You don't want to smother her and keep her like a prisoner or property. But she should understand your side too. Touchy situation, but more info would help. They could have history back to childhood.

[kevin-camron]

yes dude you have every right in the world to be upset, look maybe your girlfriend is such a girl who takes 2 guys to get satisfaction you know? or maybe she ain't that sure about you yet and wants to keep her options open,or maybe she is playing you 2 against each other to see who wins,u never know what they are thinking man sometimes they do it,but if she didn't stop,make sure she comes up with a reasonable excuse and then make sure that guys goes out with you and your girlfriend so he see you holding her hand touching and kissing her,then you can be sure there is nothing between them.(if no crazy reactions take place)

[tazzy]

All you have to do is state your case to her by telling her, If she was in your shoes, would it be ok too?

You've never met the guy and he hates you already, not really a nice thing. You don't state however why you think he hates you which makes me wonder.

I am dating someone who has a male friend and I made sure to get to know him and be friends with him. As they say, keep your friends close, your enemies closer.

You are right to be upset but not necessarily expect her not to be friends with him but do pose the question to her that if she was in your shoes, would it be ok for you to have a friend that does not like her and knows that your friend wants you?

[Rafael151]

I got the impression that he hated him because he was in the way, but that's what it sounded like for him to - an impression. And true too that people we dislike when we don't know them often turn out to be someone else. And as you said, always wise to trade shoes. What would she do and also - how would he feel if he was the "other guy"?

[lvrgirl2011]

If she doesn't have feelings for him than you shouldn't expect her to not be friends with him. Try telling her how you feel. If you make her choose between him and you then you might not be the chosen one. Girls tend to choose friends over b/fs. Plus, if nothing has happened between them before I doubt it'll start now. Don't worry.

[girls101]

if you haven't beet the guy you can hate he you dislike him but if she likes you she will do the right thing

[girls101]

He is jealous that he can't have her because you have her he hate you because of that don't worry he has to get over the fact that he can't have her