I asked a girl out and she's giving me a confusing answer?

[Anonymous]

Me and this girl have known each other for around 3 years now at college, and we get on super well. We have only really been good friends over the last 4 months, but we definitely haven't friendzoned eachother. She told my friend a while ago that she liked me, and my friend told me to go for it but I haven't until recently as I recently got out of a relationship. A couple of weeks ago, I saw her on a night out and asked if she wanted to go for a drink, and she said yes and seemed pretty keen for it. She also told me to remind her tomorrow because she'll probably forget about it, as we were both pretty drunk. The day after I messaged her asking if she remembered my proposition and she said no, and when I told her I asked her out she said "I'm too nice sometimes" and then "I need to wise up". Obviously taking this as rejection I just left it thinking she didn't want it, which I was gutted about but accepted we were just going to be friends. Then that evening, she was out drinking with friends, and messaged me asking if I was joking. I said no and she replied "of course I'll go for a drink with you, which date suits you?" and we also talked about where we were going to go. Again, she seemed pretty keen. Were her friends just convincing her to go on a date with me? The day after that I messaged her again confirming which day I was free and I didn't get a reply for a while. When I finally did she said "Sorry I definitely won't be able to do this week as I'm pretty busy", and she didn't offer an alternative. I left it at that, rejection, which really confused me because she technically said yes twice. I've been waiting to bump into her around campus to ask her again, as I don't want to message and seem desperate, but I haven't seen her yet. Should I just man up and message her once more? Should I just take this as she doesn't want to go on a date?

[APEXGuerrilla]

This is known as being hot and cold, or ambiguous. Personally, I really hate when girls pull this shit, but some guys supposedly really like it. So, basically, she is in one of two camps, & its your job to find out which & defuse the situation. Either, she really likes you, but also has like probably a sexual rape fantasy or something where she idealizes the guy being really aggressive or especially bold in his approach, OR- she actually doesn't like you or is very on the fence about it. (And indecisive) So, my advice is this, try to increase your Sexual Market Value by a small but respectable margin, let her cool off for a while, try talking with a few other girls in the class, flex in front of her in some meaningful way, and then try again. My experience tells me she probably likes you to some degree but she's probably on the fence, so this will be your best bet, but alas it will still be up to you to decipher. Good luck!

[Mexicvn]

Totally agree with you.

[Peuples_Francs]

I would leave things as they are. She starts off seemingly interested and then brushes you off, then claims it was a joke. Then again brushes you off due to "lack of time".

I don't know how it is for most people, but when I'm interested in hanging out with someone, I not only make it clear from the get-go, but also make some time to be with them.

[Asker]

I made it pretty clear too but obviously didn't want to rush it seen as I had just come out a relationship. She claimed she thought I was joking, is it possible she is somehow intimidated by the thought of me haha

[MikeGaveO]

Waaaay too confusing, let it go, she can't make her mind.

[Laozi]

Just go and talk to her. And ask her why she's doing this to you.