What does it mean when she says "Wait for me to come to you"?

[Anonymous]

So I recently told my best friend that I was in love with her, she took it they way I expected it cause well I knew I caught feelings first, but she wants me to be patient and as she said "Wait for me to come to you" now what does this mean exactly? I've know her alittle over 5 years and she knows I got love for her I felt like our friendship is solid as fuck and it's means everything but now that she knows I'm In Love with her I feel she is keeping her distant from me, she doesn't try texting me or talking the way we use too I feel I might have made her uncomfortable with me.

Am I thinking too much on this? Or is their something that I am not seeing for allowing myself to see? Cause I really feel we should be close enough to have a real conversation like this, it's the hope in me that thinks 'Maybe it's because of all she went through that she isn't just going to jump into another relationship' I get that an honestly I'm just asking for more because I've grown so attracted to her that it's just hard to be around her without controlling that lust but she doesn't seem to see nor care for the feelings that I have for her and if she does she refuse to share it with me. Again what do I do?

[Anonymous]

Here’s what I’m getting from this (keep in mind that this is simply an outside opinion, not fact): “wait for me to come to you” was like a placeholder. She’s essentially asking (again, speculation) you to be patient and give it time, so her feelings to grow naturally. Which gives the impression that she never had them to begin with. You probably caught her off guard by saying you’ve gained feelings for her, and she bought herself some time. However, it sounds like she’s not exactly interested in you the way you’re interested, but doesn’t want to hurt your feelings. I say this because she’s now backpedaling (talking less, being distant, etc), rather than trying harder, or flirting, etc. So, if this theory is correct, then where should you go from here? I’d say talk to her in person. I know it’s an uncomfortable topic and you fear destroying the friendship but let me make one thing very clear: if she is really your friend, then she will stick around. But you need some clarity! You need that final answer so you can act accordingly.

[Asker]

I've gotten to a point in this situation that made me act.. impatiently an we had gotten to a point where she has told me don't be impatient with her and that she is trying to figure things out.

I feel a lot of what you said sounds correct but I feel if I try to push the issue again it will really show that I am not respecting her feelings, I want to wait but I also don't want her feeling like she has to hide from me as she do so, and I think she feels she has to because I am no longer willing to hide how I feel around her.

[Opinion Owner]

I genuinely feel like you’re overthinking this too much. Still, you know her best and if you truly feel like clearing the air is like twisting a knife, then don’t do it.

[Asker]

Your right I do it a lot especially when it's important to me. I need to get better with it. I appreciate what you're saying and it's what needs to be said, I just feel like I'd be giving up *Sighs*

[Opinion Owner]

You feel like you’d be giving up by not saying anything?

[Asker]

Well I feel like she will think that I'm being impatient again waiting for her. She is a complicated ass person lol she has gone through some shit. My problem is, why does she become more distant after telling me to give her time to have the conversation? That's what makes me think I might have fucked our friendship up.

[Opinion Owner]

Her telling you to wait makes me feel even more like she’s not interested because honestly, what’s there to wait for? You’ve known her for years now, where is the impatience? She’s completely putting up obstacles that she can victimize herself behind, when in reality she already knows what she wants. She knows how she feels. The problem is that rather than just telling you, she’s distancing herself from you and that isn’t fair. You aren’t doing anything wrong or pushy but now you feel like a villain for having feelings. That’s not ok.

[Waldoe]

WAIT... she was surprised, and needs time to think about what you just said... wait for her to decide, and if its a yes, she will "Come to you"... DO NOT PRESSURE her, or you will lose the friendship too

[Asker]

That's what's driving me, I want to be patient, last thing I want is to pressure her, but how do I wait? How do I not worry when she just says Wait and then don't talk to me for a week? 😂

[Waldoe]

mmmm that's tough... Just send her an XOXOXO... without comments